Wedding Pet Peeves

Eggshell31 · June 2011

I HATE HATE HATE when weddings have DJs that talk too much. You know- the ones that think the party is all about them!!!!

I HATE line dancing.. Well I'm ok with one in the beginning to get everyone on the dance floor. BUT THAT IS IT!!!

I really dont like cake smashing

i dislike anything to do with lighting of candles or sand or anything like that.

I HATE HATE HATE DRY weddings.. ya know- the ones without any booze. THAT IS NOT OK! lol

lastly- I don't like when the bride thinks the day is all about her.. YES it is "your" day but with your future husband.. Let the guy pick the cake, or the colors or the song.. SOMETHING

goobersinlove · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:58562de3-758f-49ea-92ac-0a26b8e586af">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE] *inappropropriate music - I knew the bride when she used to rock n' roll; songs that are overtly sexual. Just doesn't seem right for a wedding
Posted by gottadance64[/QUOTE]

Totally agree with this! It just seems very un-classy to me to see a beautiful bride and an elegant white gown... grinding like a 17 year old at prom to a rap song about hoes and b*tches.

Money dances.

DJ's with bad equipment that causes mic malfunctions alllll nighttttt.

marleylikeair · June 2011

I don't mind the bouquet toss; as long as enough people want to do it, I think it's fine. When it gets awkward, IMO, is when the DJ has to cajole people to come over and do it when they don't really want to. Someone mentioned it being trashy; I think this tradition is only as tacky/trashy as the behavior of the participants. If the girls are practically fighting each other to get the bouquet, ick. I got toe-stabbed once by a stiletto. That sucked.

I don't know about the garter toss, though. I really don't need my grandparents watching my man go up my dress and then throw my undergarment at a bunch of other dudes.

I've never been to a wedding where there was a chicken dance. IMO, that was only fun when I was eight and went to the daddy-daughter dance with my Girl Scout Troop. I'm okay with most other group dances. They can be fun and get people on the floor, so why not? I just don't love the Cupid Shuffle, because it's too repetitive and I don't happen to love the song itself. (Something about the singer's voice--which probably has just as much to do with Autotune as anything.)

goobersinlove · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:cf4a0066-93a2-4817-9198-57b5945f92a3">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE]I think there's a good chance that FI and I will be, if not full-on smashers, at least icing-smearers. Our relationship is silly that way. We pull immature pranks on each other on a near-daily basis; I see no reason for our wedding day to be different.
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]

I personally don't understand why some people think cake-smashing is mean. I anticipate cake smashing with us too, because we have a VERY goofy and playful relationship. We wrestle all the time... sometimes we even get carried away and hurt each other, but it's all light-hearted and good fun. I think that if you are like that, it's a great way to let some of your personality as a couple out. After all, it's YOUR wedding. I'm looking forward to getting my sinuses packed with frosting at the end of it all.

gottadance64 · June 2011

ugh - smashing wedding cake - I hate the whole feeding each other cake thing - it's weird if you ask me. We don't feed each other at home, why would we do so in public in front of everyone, at our wedding no less! I'm hoping to get out of that - fi is more traditional. I didn't even want a cake, I wanted brownies and cheesecake - things that I love. I'm not big on cake.

AudgiePodge · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:f4fa32f6-0874-4abc-8e7a-2c6a1ccce418">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE]<b> I'm not big on cake.</b>
Posted by gottadance64[/QUOTE]

<b>SHUN!!!</b>

zipis1 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:cf4a0066-93a2-4817-9198-57b5945f92a3">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE]I think there's a good chance that FI and I will be, if not full-on smashers, at least icing-smearers. Our relationship is silly that way. We pull immature pranks on each other on a near-daily basis; I see no reason for our wedding day to be different.
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]

Same here. I don't know if I want an all out smashing, because I'd be afraid of it getting on my dress, but if we didn't do at leasy an icing smear, well it just wouldn't be us.

Heck, I did it at my prom with my bestie, how could I <em>not</em> do it at my wedding :P

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But my pet peeves would definitely be a head table and the garter toss, especially when it involves the groom goint up there with his head and fishing it out with his teeth while the bride's 90 yeard old grandmother watches...

peekaboo2011 · June 2011

I think the gloves thing is weird. I don't even think we carry gloves at our salon. And we get some weird requests.

Money dance = tacky. Although those money roses are pretty, but I'd rather them be from books that were falling to shreds anyways. Please do not destroy a book just in the name of roses.

Dry weddings/cash bar. Who the hell do you think you are? That's all I have to say on that one. Although, we'll probably do a seriously scaled back bar to save money (it's an extra $18 a head for a full bar. Yikesymama), but we would NEVER ask our guests to pay for their own drinks or deny them the pleasure of getting shitfaced.

Those stupid group dances. They're obnoxious.

As far as cake smashing, we have a pretty playful relationship, but I will kill him if he ruins my hair or makeup. If I'm going to spend all day getting ready, he had better play nice. I think the sweet feeding to each other is cute though. And something we'll probably do.

Sparrow87 · June 2011

All of my pet peeves have been mentioned, but I want to hear some of the crazy requests that you get at work Peek!

bethsmiles · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:aac834ea-cb9b-44d6-9a1d-4aabe0f996b0">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE]All of my pet peeves have been mentioned, but I want to hear some of the crazy requests that you get at work Peek!
Posted by Sparrow87[/QUOTE]

Ditto! Spill it, Peek!

lunarsongbird · June 2011

You get any requests for stuff like this?

Peaseblossom55 · June 2011

Not a fan of garter or bouquet toss. I've never been to a wedding with a money dance but it does sound tacky.

peekaboo2011 · June 2011

There be a crazy dress post

lilphillips14 · June 2011

As far as the garter toss/bouquet toss thing goes, maybe I'm in the minority, but I like both traditions. My dad did the whole going under the dress and coming back up with the teeth thing with my mom and somehow, I found it kind of adorable...then again, my family's not exactly high class. I think we'll probably end up doing it because it's a tradition in my family, unless my fiance has a strong objection to it, but I don't think he will.

Group dances are fun to me, at least the Cha-cha slide and the Electric Slide because they get people out on the dance floor and are good icebreakers.

One big pet peeve (especially in my family) is people getting WAY too drunk at receptions and causing drama. It ruins everyone else's good time, especially if people close to you have to deal with you throwing up everywhere. Ugh, too many personal experiences with that one.

jaycee7389 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:ce253a1f-61b5-4532-9594-d5fdd540ed2e">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE]My pet peeves: - Overly formal weddings. I get the point "if you can't be formal at your wedding, when can you be?" but IMO it needs to fit in with the couples' personalities and most of my friends are not super formal/traditional but had super formal weddings. I just feel like they are going through the motions and no one can REALLY let loose and celebrate because of the atmosphere. This isn't just for weddings, but for any type of social event. - Dry weddings or cash bars. I understand dry for religous purposes, but I honestly don't know anyone to whom that applies in my circle. It just makes me irate to go to a wedding and see thousands of dollars worth of flowers, a photobooth, ridiculous centerpieces, a $10,000 dress on the bride, and be asked to fork over $10 for a beer. I just think it's improper hosting. - Bouquet/garter toss. Bouquet just because I feel awkward getting forced to go do it. Garter because I don't think the groom should go up the bride's dress in public. -<strong> Head tables that include the bridal party without their significant others.</strong> I would seriously be tempted to decline if I knew for a fact this would be the case and I didn't know anyone else going. I seriously hate smalltalk with people I don't know and would be uncomfortabel the whole evening. - In my circle there aren't money dances or stag/doe fundraising parties, but I would be against those if I ever saw them done. - Bride/groom who don't make sure to interact with each guest at least for a few moments, either at table visits, or on the dance floor, or something. I was at two weddings in the last year where BF and I literally did not see up close/talk to the bride/groom all night...and that's sort of the point of our being there. - This comes after the wedding, but either no thank you note at all, or thank you notes after, like, a year. It's just rude. If someone even does something really nice for me in my everyday life, they get a handwritten thank you note.
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]

Me too! How is that fair to the BP and their dates? blahh

Swazzle · June 2011

I loathe the electric slide.

Sosteadilygo · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:ce253a1f-61b5-4532-9594-d5fdd540ed2e">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE]My pet peeves: - Overly formal weddings. I get the point "if you can't be formal at your wedding, when can you be?" but IMO it needs to fit in with the couples' personalities and most of my friends are not super formal/traditional but had super formal weddings. I just feel like they are going through the motions and no one can REALLY let loose and celebrate because of the atmosphere. This isn't just for weddings, but for any type of social event. - Dry weddings or cash bars. I understand dry for religous purposes, but I honestly don't know anyone to whom that applies in my circle. It just makes me irate to go to a wedding and see thousands of dollars worth of flowers, a photobooth, ridiculous centerpieces, a $10,000 dress on the bride, and be asked to fork over $10 for a beer. I just think it's improper hosting. - Bouquet/garter toss. Bouquet just because I feel awkward getting forced to go do it. Garter because I don't think the groom should go up the bride's dress in public. - Head tables that include the bridal party without their significant others. I would seriously be tempted to decline if I knew for a fact this would be the case and I didn't know anyone else going. I seriously hate smalltalk with people I don't know and would be uncomfortabel the whole evening. - In my circle there aren't money dances or stag/doe fundraising parties, but I would be against those if I ever saw them done. - <strong>Bride/groom who don't make sure to interact with each guest at least for a few moments, either at table visits, or on the dance floor, or something. I was at two weddings in the last year where BF and I literally did not see up close/talk to the bride/groom all night...and that's sort of the point of our being there</strong>. - This comes after the wedding, but either no thank you note at all, or thank you notes after, like, a year. It's just rude. If someone even does something really nice for me in my everyday life, they get a handwritten thank you note.
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>All of this.</div><div>
</div><div>About the bolded part - One of my good friends getting married next year has the ridiculous idea in her head that her and FI won't need to thank their guests at the reception. She is also 23, and got engaged when they were dating for 8 months. </div><div>
</div><div>Her words: "I really don't see the point of going up to tables to thank people, it takes so much time and I want to spend the whole night with H. If people want to talk to us, they should come to us instead". I explained to her the whole reason you go up to your guests is to THANK them for watching you get married. Her response? "Oh I don't think of it like that at all, it's just a party". :face palm: </div><div>
</div>

marleylikeair · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:ce253a1f-61b5-4532-9594-d5fdd540ed2e">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE] - This comes after the wedding, but either no thank you note at all, or thank you notes after, like, a year. It's just rude. If someone even does something really nice for me in my everyday life, they get a handwritten thank you note.
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]

I think I read somewhere, that technically, according to etiquette rules, the bride and groom have up to a year to send out a thank-you note, and guests have up to a year to get a gift. Something like that. Anyone else heard of this? I might just be crazy.

I can understand your irritation, though, Liv.

GreenPepperBurger · June 2011

Proper etiquette states that couples have up to a year to receive gifts and send thank yous. Personally, I would feel weird sending a thank you note for something that was a year ago...

Sosteadilygo · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:60b48c9f-0847-4fd8-9b46-7712fcf2bb5f">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE]Proper etiquette states that couples have up to a year to receive gifts and send thank yous. Personally, I would feel weird sending a thank you note for something that was a year ago...
Posted by GreenPepperBurger[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>We just got a TY from someone from a wedding that was last July. I know etiquette states that it's in the range of time, but I personally agree with you and would feel super weird about it.

</div>

GreenPepperBurger · June 2011

Some people like to send a pro pic of themselves as part of a thank you, which can take a while, since they have to wait for the photos to come in. This is understandable, I guess, but I really don't care if your thank you card has your pro pics on it.

bsidebella · June 2011

Totally late to the party on this but WHATEVA I DO WHAT I WANT!

I HAAAAAAAAAATE cake smashing. Come on, we are adults, not children. My FSIL and FBIL did this at their wedding. Here was my FSIL in this gorgeous gown and her makeup all nice and then she gets cake smeared all over her face. Then she chased him around the reception hall with a handful of cake until it was mashed all over his face. *sigh*

I think the garter thing is trashy. I know I won't be taking any part in that.

Colored wedding dresses bug me (a pink dress? Really? It's a wedding not a Sweet 16). Well, okay let me amend that. I don't mind an accent color, like a lovely white dress with a pretty sash that matches the bridesmaids dresses. I think that's nice.

FI brought up the subject of having a karaoke machine at the wedding. No, no and more no. A wedding is not the place for your drunk friends to warble through "Every Rose Has Its Thorn".

[Deleted User] · June 2011

the garter and bouquet toss. unfortunately we'll be doing the garter because it's the one thing FI really wants to do, only because it's a big tradition in his family/friends and we're not doing the "groom holds onto the bride's train and all the guys try to knock him over or rip the train" game or letting them pin money on me. it was the least humiliating out of the three. also, I think we've worked out a deal where FI will have the throwing garter in his pocket and we won't have to do the up the skirt part. we'll see, I'm crossing my fingers.

and I never participate in the bouquet toss, so we're going to do something like honor the couple who has been married the longest with a bouquet.

and I don't like it when people get completely drunk at weddings. we won't be having alcohol at our wedding, but for personal and religious preferences. the reception is in our church, so no alcohol. most of our closest friends and family don't drink (or drink very little) so it won't be a big deal in our group of friends. most of the weddings I go to are dry, or just champagne for a toast.

heyimbren · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:83b10dc3-6ac1-4c0f-8625-e1797faac4f5">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE] and I don't like it when people get completely drunk at weddings. we won't be having alcohol at our wedding, but for personal and religious preferences. the reception is in our church, so no alcohol. most of our closest friends and family don't drink (or drink very little) so it won't be a big deal in our group of friends. <strong>most of the weddings I go to are dry, or just champagne for a toast.
</strong>Posted by CocoBellaF[/QUOTE]

Coco, that's what I was thinking. I don't think I've ever been at a wedding with anything more than wine, and that's only been once or twice. Because of that, I guess I never see weddings as drinking occasions, which is strange because I actually have nothing against social drinking at all.

MLekathLEEN · June 2011

If I'm spending a good amount of money on my makeup, I do not want cake to ruin it. A little around the lips and maybe the tip of my nose is ok but if I have to wash at least 50% of my makeup off midway through the reception, I will be pissed.

I love all awful dances. I can dance but usually I choose not to. The sprinkler and the cabbage patch? Yes, please. Cha Cha Slide, even better.

I know etiquette states a year for Thank You but I think it looks better to send them a few weeks after or so.

I HATE any form of money dance. This DJ I've seen at two weddings does a think where the bride and groom run around the room to see who can collect the most money. The loser has to do one task of the winner's choosing for a whole year. It's a cute idea but I will not be running around in my nice dress trying to get money after these nice people have already spent however much. I'll rub FI's back anytime he wants, whatev.

I'm cool with the garter/bouquet toss. However, at the rate FI and I are going, we will be only (fairly recently) single people who would have been eligable if it were 6 hours prior.

The jumping photo. Not sure why, but it drives me nuts.

[Deleted User] · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-pet-peeves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eb2d224b-09ee-4f5d-bc16-2b5a39236a07Post:a5bb0b60-8b6b-4091-9512-694ef0e82a86">Re: Wedding Pet Peeves</a>:
[QUOTE]If I'm spending a good amount of money on my makeup, I do not want cake to ruin it. A little around the lips and maybe the tip of my nose is ok but if I have to wash at least 50% of my makeup off midway through the reception, I will be pissed. I love all awful dances. I can dance but usually I choose not to. The sprinkler and the cabbage patch? Yes, please. Cha Cha Slide, even better. I know etiquette states a year for Thank You but I think it looks better to send them a few weeks after or so. I HATE any form of money dance. This DJ I've seen at two weddings does a think where the bride and groom run around the room to see who can collect the most money. The loser has to do one task of the winner's choosing for a whole year. It's a cute idea but I will not be running around in my nice dress trying to get money after these nice people have already spent however much. I'll rub FI's back anytime he wants, whatev. I'm cool with the garter/bouquet toss. However, at the rate FI and I are going, we will be only (fairly recently) single people who would have been eligable if it were 6 hours prior. <strong>The jumping photo.</strong> Not sure why, but it drives me nuts.
Posted by MLekathLEEN[/QUOTE]

oh, yes! this, too. I've had to do it as a BM and it sucked.

Louisa1000 · June 2011

I may be a minority here, but I hate everything about a wedding that turns it into a narcissistic show. Like: crazy long first dances with five permutations while everyone is staring awkwardly at people waddling with each other, the head table -as if they are king and queen holding court, and while we're on it, gloves and tiaras, big elaborate entrances as if they were Elvis or something, bouquet toss-as if she is a rock star throwing a scarf to the audience, (and I just resent it every time I'm forced to go try and catch it), garter toss (more because it's just inappropriate and tacky to go under your bride's dress with your teeth in public, not so much because it's narcissistic.) I know most brides will do these things because it's such a part of our cultural tradition now and they've dreamed about it for years, and i don't fault anyone for it, but I am ditching them all! Getting married does not make you a queen or a celebrity.

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