Christian Weddings

Premarital Classes, where are you at?

We just took our first one-on-one session with our Pastor yesterday evening. I was SO nervous at first, but it ended up being great. We took a test called PREPARE-ENRICH to test our compatability and values in various areas of life and it turns out we scored very high, consequently making us very compatible : ) What are your experiences? How early have you/did you start pre-marital counseling or one-on-one sessions with your officiant?

Re: Premarital Classes, where are you at?

  • ASquared11ASquared11 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Hi!  My fiance and I took Prepare-Enrich too!  We had one meeting with our pastor, then went home and took the assessment, and have had one meeting since then.  We will continue to meet to get through everything from this test.  Technically it's not a test, and for compatibility.  Most it looks at your communication strengths/weaknesses which I really liked.  We had our first meeting at the beginning of the summer and we're getting married in June and we will continue to meet every month or other month until then.  I have really enjoyed it!
  • edited December 2011
    Yes! You articulated that better than I did. Not compatibility but your strengths and "work areas" as a couple. I loved it! So glad you did too.
  • fpaemp2011fpaemp2011 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    We're doing an 8 week class at church going through Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts by Les & Leslie Parrot.  Today was our 2nd class.  I actually JUST finished my part of PREPARE-ENRICH...FI will do his part later this week, and then we'll meet with the couple teaching the class to go over it.  The other couple taking the class with us is our age and getting married on the same day we are, so it's been great getting to know them.  We've been making a point of making sure we get time together on Sunday afternoons to talk about the class, and then have focused time later in the week to go over the homework.
  • jsimmjsimm member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    PP- we took the same class back in March, and we're getting married next month.  We absolutely loved it!  We were such dorks, coming back to his house, running through the HW and talking for hours about it. Our teachers considered us the over-acheivers, as the other couples, on the surface, didn't seem to put as much into it as we did.  The class only works as well as what you put into it.  Enjoy the rest of your class.  
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  • GJones27GJones27 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My experience with Orthodox Christian premarital classes was very different.  We just talked very generally about our relationship, and our priest provided some guidance on how to handle fights and such.  He didn't recommend that we take surveys... he said he used to do it, but it caused more problems between couples!  I think we'll meet a couple more times with the priest.
  • edited December 2011
    Wow looks like a lot of you girls did the same class! I guess it's more popular than I thought. JSimm -- we were totally psyched about our homework and class, you are not the only "dorks", we stayed up late and talked about everything we reviewed with our Pastor.
  • edited December 2011
    We also took the Prepare/Enrich survey and met to discuss the results, along with other common issues newlyweds face.  It was helpful to get some advice, especially from our Pastor, learning where to look in the Bible. 

    But I wish we had gone with our other Pastor, who looks in-depth at the Bible, Martin Luther's writings, and a sermon on marriage written by Bonhoeffer.  He did give us all of the readings, so we're hoping to at least read them sometime.
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  • iamjoesgurliamjoesgurl member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We wanted to do the Prepare/Enrich inventory, but we went through a marriage resource center and had a mentor couple who felt more comfortable with FOCCUS (even though they were certified for Prepare/Enrich).  We did three sessions with them (DH and I were long distance at the time so 3 long sessions worked much better than 6 shorter sessions).  I think that as long as you both have the right attitude and willingness to apply yourselves, the preparation is very helpful.
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  • azdancer8azdancer8 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We're doing counseling with FI's former pastor who lives out of state, so he comes to town once a month to meet with us. We've met once, where we talked about what marriage means and compatability, and already my relationship with FI is deeper than it was and we're communicating better. :)

    We have our next meeting scheduled for the end of September. He's got 6 topics he wants to cover, including intimacy, conflict management, and communication. We'll have to squeeze two topics in on a few of our sessions, since we're limited on time. But hopefully we won't do intimacy and conflict management on the same day, LOL! ;)
  • iamjoesgurliamjoesgurl member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    By the way JoyMatt - I'm totally craving pumpkin spice latte now!!!
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  • edited December 2011
    Haha -- I was thinking I should probably take it down because I crave a pumpkin spice latte everytime I post on TK! : )
  • KikoLoveAndiKikoLoveAndi member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yeah totally wanting that too lol.

    I think we also took Prepare/Enrich.   We worked through it in a few sessions (that were rather long but sence he lives 4 hours away we made the most of the time we had).  As of now we have two sessions left.  Finances  (next week) and sex (the last week or so).  It has been very good for us to see our strengths and weeknesses and how we can use them to grow each other. 
    Photobucket Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    I can't wait to do ours!!! It's next month :o) congrats to you all!
  • edited December 2011
    Before Matt left for basic. We were going to a Christian therapist for our premarital counseling and working through a book and corresponding workbook called "Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts." Both have been very beneficial especially the therapy learning how to properly communicate and fight fair etc. The church will require us to also do some sessions with the pastor before getting married.

    Off subject... i'm with the others the pumpkin spice sticker makes me wish i could go get one right now lol

    also how do have put your countdowns into your signatures? and the pictures i cannot seem to figure it out lol 
    Brittany and Matthew December 28 USAF- Proud Fianc? Wedding Countdown Ticker
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