Snarky Brides

tk confessions

You know how this works. Tk confessions only, maybe let's focus in on what we are sick of on here. Minus 11000 points if anyone says they are sick of glitches. That goes without saying.
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Re: tk confessions

  • NebbNebb member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Ok seriously where the hell is everyone. That's what I think sucks about this place lately is noone is ever around. Its a freaking ghost town.
  • I'm sick of the random people who've never been on this board coming in here and venting about whatever because they think they're "snarky".

  • I confess that the first time I started a morning thread, I was worried that people would be like "who the hell are you and why are you saying good morning?"  Which is incredibly lame, I know.  

    I was a creepy lurker for a really long time (see join date).  It sometimes freaks me out a little when I think about how many other people must be lurking like I did, and how much they know about me when  I know nothing about them. 
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  • I get annoyed when people get all up in arms over certain topics (cash bar, dollar dance, brides wishing their BMs would help with something, etc). Especially when some things are common to people and their families, they still are given the third degree. Or maybe I'm just tired of seeing the word "tacky."

    When people tell brides to just give their BMs a dress color and fabric when the BMs are being bitchy. Assuming the bride has taken budget and other considerations into account, then I think she has every right to be upset when the BMs won't STFU and wear the damn dress.
  • LP11509LP11509 member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited June 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:8cbfa309-443e-486f-8301-28519dce5c95">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]This is probably more of an "i judge" but it has to do party lines. I am so sick of seeing "just host cake and punch" when someone says they are on a tight budget.  Is cake and punch a perfectly acceptable reception?  YES.  Should it always be suggested? NO.  I saw it suggested multiple times in a  thread a week or so ago concerning a DW. (Reception board).   <strong>I'm sorry, but DWs up the hosting ante to me.   You invite everyone to hop on a plane and come see you get married? You better offer than more than a freaking slice of cake for doing so. I know, I know, invitations are not subpoenas and all that jazz. Couple has a low-key wedding where they live and serves cake and punch? Fine by me.  You spend the bucks to get yourself to your DW spot and then give your guests just a slice of cake?  I judge you hardcore. </strong>
    Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

    <div>I agree.  I'd be kind of pissed if I dropped several thousand dollars and used several vacation days to travel far for a wedding, and all they served me was cake and punch.  Even if H and I made a vacation out of it.</div>
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  • Confession: I was really nervous playing in the "TK Memories/First Impressions" thread. I was a real asshat when I first started posting, and I have the worst TK memory in the history of TK, so when you combine those two, it can be pretty annoying. It took me a good 9 or so months before I became really comfortable on this board. But, I love it here, and I even welcome it when people flame me because how the hell else am I supposed to know I need fixin' if no one tells me?
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  • It really bothers me when people don't apply the same standards (totally not the right word, but I'm at a loss for a better one) to regs and new posters.  If a new poster had come along wanting to do a vow renewal like Any did, they would have been shot down.  But nobody said anything to Any about hers (that I saw, anyway) because we all like her.  Also, I'm pretty sure she referred to hers as a wedding several times and nobody said anything, including me which I realize makes me a big ol hypocrite. .

     
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:93075a0d-8a6f-41a2-9e5c-b6bef21ff371">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]I get annoyed when people get all up in arms over certain topics (cash bar, dollar dance, brides wishing their BMs would help with something, etc). Especially when some things are common to people and their families, they still are given the third degree. Or maybe I'm just tired of seeing the word "tacky." When people tell brides to just give their BMs a dress color and fabric when the BMs are being bitchy. Assuming the bride has taken budget and other considerations into account, then I think she has every right to be upset when the BMs won't STFU and wear the damn dress.
    Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

    Agreed on both accounts Sesh.
    panther
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:93075a0d-8a6f-41a2-9e5c-b6bef21ff371">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]I get annoyed when people get all up in arms over certain topics (cash bar, dollar dance, brides wishing their BMs would help with something, etc). Especially when some things are common to people and their families, they still are given the third degree. Or maybe I'm just tired of seeing the word "tacky." When people tell brides to just give their BMs a dress color and fabric when the BMs are being bitchy<strong>. Assuming the bride has taken budget and other considerations into account, then I think she has every right to be upset when the BMs won't STFU and wear the damn dress.</strong>
    Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

    Word.  And, honestly, I also don't think its a big deal if the bride wants all of the girls to wear their hair up or down.  Not as in, do this crazy updo style, but just wear it up?  Okay.

  • NebbNebb member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I sorta side eye DWs. It seems to me like saying "drop a wad of cash to see me get married or tough titties". As someone who doesn't have that kind of money, it sucks. I just think its sorta selfish.
  • I remember that post DJ.

    Honestly - whenever the dollar dance subject comes up I immediately look at where the poster is from.  Some areas I can understand why people don't like them, and I say this a lot sometimes - but it's legit, no one in ND really gives a flying fig about dollar dances.  In fact these people love them and expect them and think you're stupid and boring if you don't have one.  It doesn't make a dollar dance any less tacky - but as far as I'm concerned, no one in the midwest really cares, and if no one cares, then there's just no problem.  So what.
    panther
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:f6919cf1-85a3-44fb-9f59-2202a2912ad7">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: tk confessions : Word.  And, honestly, I also don't think its a big deal if the bride wants all of the girls to wear their hair up or down.  Not as in, do this crazy updo style, but just wear it up?  Okay.
    Posted by MyUserName1[/QUOTE]
    I don't have a problem with the bride saying that she wants the BMs to wear their hair up.  "Up" doesn't necessarily mean a big elaborate updo with tons of hairspray and bobby pins.  "Up" can be as simple as a dancer's bun.

    If a bride asked me to do anything I can't manage by myself in my own bathroom, however, I'd be expecting her to front the money for it.
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  • Lp- I also lurked for a way long time before I started posting. Then it started bothering me that I was investing time and getting to know people that didn't know me at all- so I told myself to either start posting and make it a mutual thing or stop lurking altogether. I was intimidated and still sometimes am, if I am being honest.

    I actually don't mind the new posters coming in randomly and starting a post- not that it is my favorite thing but at least it spices things up a bit! 
  • I'm pretty sure I'm going to get eaten alive for this since I'm still a newb but here goes...

    I confess I get irritated by the party line about all bridesmaid have to do is buy a dress and show up.  I have been a bridesmaid in several weddings and have always expected to be involved in hosting/attending a bridal shower and bach party.  I get that the brides coming on here with entitlement issues are annoying but I also get being disappointed if none of the people you thought were your nearest and dearest offered to host a party for you, especially if you have done it for them.  I also get that not everyone wants these parties, which is fine but most likely they are not the ones coming on here to talk about how they didn't get one so I don't think they count.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:c69490bd-4db0-4d16-a628-fbd03fb2907c">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: tk confessions : I don't have a problem with the bride saying that she wants the BMs to wear their hair up.  "Up" doesn't necessarily mean a big elaborate updo with tons of hairspray and bobby pins.  "Up" can be as simple as a dancer's bun. If a bride asked me to do anything I can't manage by myself in my own bathroom, however, I'd be expecting her to front the money for it.
    Posted by baystateapple[/QUOTE]

    Oh, absolutely. 

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:401c88fd-4181-4944-a050-c1c7a351dd58">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oh, and there was a dollar dance thread a couple of weeks ago that really irked me, Sesh.  OP didn't want one, but FI and his family really wanted one and had always had them.  Now, I don't like dollar dances and I suggested they reach a compromise (a wish dance or something) but many posters said something along the lines of "put your foot down and say absolutely not."  I feel like anytime the bride is being told to completely disregard the groom's wishes and put her foot down, it's a bad thing.  The wedding is just as much his as hers, so if it's something they both care about, no one should be putting their foot down.  If a bride came on here and said she wanted xyz in her wedding but her groom "put his foot down," he would probably be called controlling, a douche, emotionally abusive, etc. <strong>And then toward the end of the thread, someone compared the dollar dance to prostitution.</strong> That's way too far for something that is at worst slightly offensive and at best, a cultural tradition.
    Posted by djhar[/QUOTE]

    <div>WTF?  The only way a dollar dance would be prostitution is if the bride/groom were banging their guests during the dance.  </div>
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  • I don't get why people get pissy pants over a bride making plans for her own bachelorette party. Maybe I don't view bparties as that big of a deal, so it makes no sense to me when everyone is all 'RAWR, you can't throw your own bachelorette party!"
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:67dd9eef-b694-42a3-bba5-7828ddac7055">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm pretty sure I'm going to get eaten alive for this since I'm still a newb but here goes... I confess I get irritated by the party line about all bridesmaid have to do is buy a dress and show up.  I have been a bridesmaid in several weddings and have always expected to be involved in hosting/attending a bridal shower and bach party.  I get that the brides coming on here with entitlement issues are annoying but I also get being disappointed if none of the people you thought were your nearest and dearest offered to host a party for you, especially if you have done it for them.  I also get that not everyone wants these parties, which is fine but most likely they are not the ones coming on here to talk about how they didn't get one so I don't think they count.
    Posted by calixtine[/QUOTE]

    There's a difference though in being disappointed, and coming RAGING onto a message board full of strangers.

    My bridesmaids (H's sisters) suuuuuuuuuuuucked. One of them didn't do a darn thing except argue with me. The other one helped with somethings on the day of the wedding and nothing else. Was I disappointed that they didn't plan a shower or bachelorette or help with stuff?  Yes, of course.  But have I said anything to anyone? (...until now...) of course not.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:689af974-d488-4cd8-86ed-72a2d3554ff7">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't get why people get pissy pants over a bride making plans for her own bachelorette party. Maybe I don't view bparties as that big of a deal, so it makes no sense to me when everyone is all 'RAWR, you can't throw your own bachelorette party!"
    Posted by maratea[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Agreed. I don't bat an eye when a friend plans their own birthday party either though, which apparently some people don't like?  I DO see the issue with planning your own shower since it's a gift giving event.  But I don't generally see bachlorette parties as gift-giving occasions (unless it's lingerie or something), so meh.  

    </div>
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  • NebbNebb member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    In Response to Re:tk confessions:[QUOTE]I don't get why people get pissy pants over a bride making plans for her own bachelorette party. Maybe I don't view bparties as that big of a deal, so it makes no sense to me when everyone is all 'RAWR, you can't throw your own bachelorette party!quot; Posted by maratea[/QUOTE]
    I told my girls what I wanted to do and made the reservations. I don't see why it matters. A bparty isn't the same as a shower.
  • Oh I totally would have been sad if my BMs didn't plan anything for me.  Big time.  But like, I know that life is busy and sometimes that stuff just doesn't get done.  I'm a BM for my best friend this year and her MOH is the ring leader of planning these parties - and thank God because if I was MOH it either wouldn't get done or they would be shitty, lol.  I hate that about myself but it's true.  It's annoying having the MOH up my ass about party ideas but in the end my bff is lucky to have her.  I just don't have time for it.
    panther
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:689af974-d488-4cd8-86ed-72a2d3554ff7">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't get why people get pissy pants over a bride making plans for her own bachelorette party. Maybe I don't view bparties as that big of a deal, so it makes no sense to me when everyone is all 'RAWR, you can't throw your own bachelorette party!"
    Posted by maratea[/QUOTE]

    I agree. Who the eff cares who planned the party? Any party, really. Engagement, birthday, whatever. It's not like you're forced to bring a gift. Just go and have a good time, or don't go, and miss out on a what may be a good time.

    I actually prefer registry and wardrobe details on the invitation. The "word of mouth" method is stupid to me. I don't want to have to call people to find out what to wear. If it's casual or fancy, then tell me on the invitation so I can avoid a phone call or two. Same with a registry.
  • This is more of a... thought? than a confession:  I don't really understand why being a newb is seen as a bad thing. I mean, everyone was new at one time.  It just seems like if you have under X amount of posts, if you say something that deserves a side-eye, it is taken much worse than someone who has been here awhile.

    Confession:  I always laugh when a poster makes a spelling/grammatical error when they are flaming someone for a spelling/grammatical error.

    imageVacation
  • Oh yeah, the registry info on the invite - I totally don't judge at all.  I have never, ever seen a wedding invitation without that stuff on there and if I did I would automatically assume that the couple just didn't register.  People call putting it on the invitation "gift grabby."  FFS, stfu.  Having a flucking registry is gift grabby, then - you're picking stuff out all "buy this for me."  Why not put it on the damn invitation, who cares. 
    panther
  • I feel like there hasn't been many new people on the board lately. And I mean new people that stick around. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:7254312d-bbfd-49c9-9c4c-34dad693e095">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: tk confessions :<strong> Agreed. I don't bat an eye when a friend plans their own birthday party either though, which apparently some people don't like? </strong> I DO see the issue with planning your own shower since it's a gift giving event.  But I don't generally see bachlorette parties as gift-giving occasions (unless it's lingerie or something), so meh.  
    Posted by LP11509[/QUOTE]

    I don't like when people plan their own birthday parties/nights out. Then again I've never really had a birthday party so maybe I am just jealous lol. But FSIL throws herself a birthday party every year (with theme and favors, etc) and FI and I both just kinda shake our heads.
    June 16, 2012
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  • I also don't see the big deal in planning your own birthday party/night out. I think it is different if gifts are expected, or the birthday person gets mad at people that can't come though. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:b2b361dd-4b51-4d10-b1b1-6fddfdc81392">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: tk confessions : I agree. Who the eff cares who planned the party? Any party, really. Engagement, birthday, whatever. It's not like you're forced to bring a gift. Just go and have a good time, or don't go, and miss out on a what may be a good time. I actually prefer registry and wardrobe details on the invitation. The "word of mouth" method is stupid to me. I don't want to have to call people to find out what to wear. If it's casual or fancy, then tell me on the invitation so I can avoid a phone call or two. Same with a registry.
    Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

    <div>I agree with all of this.  I also don't understand why showers in general are acceptable by etiquette standards, really.  So it's not ok to put registry information in an invitation.  But it IS ok to invite people to an event where the sole purpose is to give the bride gifts, and it's ok to include registry information there.  It doesn't really make a whole lot of sense to me.</div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:06db9cd3-2bcf-4dbb-adb4-6c2949a056ed">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: tk confessions : I agree with all of this.  I also don't understand why showers in general are acceptable by etiquette standards, really.  So it's not ok to put registry information in an invitation.  But it IS ok to invite people to an event where the sole purpose is to give the bride gifts, and it's ok to include registry information there.  It doesn't really make a whole lot of sense to me.
    Posted by LP11509[/QUOTE]


    I think the reasoning behind it is because for showers, you are required to give a gift.  I mean if you show up to a shower without a gift, I'm sorry, but you're an idiot.  And with weddings, you don't necessarily have to give a gift.  But let's be real - most people show up to a wedding with AT LEAST a card, it's pretty rare to go to a wedding empty handed.  People want to wish the couple well and many do so with a gift.  IMO because of that it's not tacky to put registry info on the invitation.  And if you don't want to buy off the registry just don't. 
    panther
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:a1e7c2bc-7cd5-40ba-be06-09d9cfd571bfPost:cf8de6d1-23dd-43b5-9790-7e47cf0929ea">Re: tk confessions</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: tk confessions :<strong> I think the reasoning behind it is because for showers, you are required to give a gift</strong>.  I mean if you show up to a shower without a gift, I'm sorry, but you're an idiot.  And with weddings, you don't necessarily have to give a gift.  But let's be real - most people show up to a wedding with AT LEAST a card, it's pretty rare to go to a wedding empty handed.  People want to wish the couple well and many do so with a gift.  IMO because of that it's not tacky to put registry info on the invitation.  And if you don't want to buy off the registry just don't. 
    Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

    <div>But that's my point.  If asking for gifts in general is bad etiquette, then why is it even ok to have an event in the first place where gifts are required?  I mean I get what you're saying, and I follow it because I know it's considered ok by etiquette standards.  It just seems weird to me. </div>
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