Dogs in Wedding party????

deidrababe · March 2010

Has anyone ever been to a wedding where Dogs have been in the wedding party?

I want to have my two dogs as "Bridesmaids" or "Flower Dogs"

I am getting married for the second time and the dogs are our children. My thoughts are each dog would have a special "Attendant" and the person I choose as a Dog Attendant would be a VERY VERY special person in my life. Perhaps the dog attendants would be more special than a bridesmaid since they would be in charge of my Babies.

I want to have the Dog Attendant walk each dog down the aisle - and YES, I have dresses for the dogs - in fact, that is how I chose my wedding colors - I saw these "children's dresses" and the color grabbed me and I bought them for my dogs.

I am in the very beginning stages of planning our wedding, but I KNOW the dogs are a must.

thoughts?

Dog Horror Stories?

Deeds

BlameCanada · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dogs-wedding-party-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:021d8981-9410-4687-95b7-61208f6788a9Post:5c206e8c-b7a5-4bfa-bd5d-bdff8ca0399e">Dogs in Wedding party????</a>:
[QUOTE]Has anyone ever been to a wedding where Dogs have been in the wedding party? I want to have my two dogs as "Bridesmaids" or "Flower Dogs" I am getting married for the second time and the dogs are our children. My thoughts are each dog would have a special "Attendant" and the person I choose as a Dog Attendant would be a VERY VERY special person in my life. Perhaps the dog attendants would be more special than a bridesmaid since they would be in charge of my Babies. I want to have the Dog Attendant walk each dog down the aisle - and YES, I have dresses for the dogs - in fact, that is how I chose my wedding colors - I saw these "children's dresses" and the color grabbed me and I bought them for my dogs.<strong> I am in the very beginning stages of planning our wedding, but I KNOW the dogs are a must. thoughts? Dog Horror Stories?</strong> Deeds
Posted by deidrababe[/QUOTE]
Why'd you ask for thoughts if you've already made up your mind? It's not going to matter to you what anyone says, unless they are saying "yes go for it."

What if one of your guests is allergic to dogs? Just let them suffer? How about if they are terrified of dogs? Again, just let them suffer?

What are you going to do with the dogs after the ceremony? Who's going to take care of them?

Don;t dress your poor dogs up. Most animals do not like being dressed. Why do you want to make not only your guests but also your pets uncomfortable?

This is just a bad idea all around, but you're not going to listen to me anyway, so whatever.

trix1223 · March 2010

I agree with pp. As soon as you say I am in the very beginning stages of planning our wedding, but I KNOW the dogs are a must. there's absolutely NO reason to ask for thoughts. You clearly have your mind made up. But since you asked.....

Let me begin by saying that we loved dogs. We've had dogs as pets. Two of my children have 4 dogs between them, and we LOVE the dogs. We love to have them visit. We love to get pictures of the kids' pets. And the operative word here is PETS.

Your dogs are PETS. Well loved, no doubt doted on, spoiled PETS. But they're PETS. They are not people, and as such it is not appropriate at all to have them in a wedding ceremony.

The church in which I work as an organist has, fortunately, dealt with these requests by simply saying "No." I think that it's unfair to your guests and even more unfair to your dogs.

DO you know for 100% sure how your dogs will respond to being put on display in front of a large group of people? Dogs can feel tension, and will feel the natural "stress" of a wedding. (And stress doesn't mean "bad" or "good"-it's just a heightened emotion.)

Do you know for 100% sure that you don't have guests who are allergic to dogs or very afraid of dogs? Do you know for 100% sure that your dogs won't start to bark or try to run during the ceremony? Do you know for 100% sure that your dogs won't squat and pee or poop right in the middle of your ceremony?

And what happens if the dogs do become agitated? Which of your people guests now has to leave your ceremony to care for the dogs? And what will you do with them during the reception?

I think that treating dogs like people is just unfair to the dogs. I get that you love them. Then why in heaven's name would you put them in dresses DRESSES!!! and parade them around like little freaks.

I think you're being silly. So will many of your guests. But you won't care, because clearly your dogs are more important.

mapales2 · March 2010

I have not been to a wedding were the pets have been directly involved, but I do understand your desire to involve them. Being a veterinarian and all around lover of animals, I have struggled with how much I want my beloved pets to be involved in my wedding. My fiance and I both feel that our pets are our children and knew that our wedding day wouldn't be complete unless we feel there presence. Ultimately, we decided that we will take a few photos with our "babies" after the ceremony is complete. Also, we are making table number cards in there honor. Each table number card will have a different photo of one of the pets. Many of my friends have done similar things. Actually involving your dogs in the ceremony may be difficult because there will be a lot of people present and your dogs may be easily distracted and may feel overwhelmed if they are not used to being around large crowds. It may be easier on you and them to find a less involved role for them. If you feel that they can handle the situation and the ceremony site has no problems allowing pets, I say go for it! Just remember that pets can sometimes do strange things in stressful situations (you don't want one of them to go potty while walking down the aisle). As long as you are ok with the possible issues you may encounter then you should do it. After all, it is your wedding and you are entitled to have all your family present, even the four legged members!

Good luck!

[Deleted User] · March 2010

Not a fan. At all.

trix1223 · March 2010

Oh, and FWIW, if you asked me to be a "dog attendant" in your wedding, I'd burst out laughing, and continue laughing as I walked away from you, because I'd be so insulted that I wouldn't be able to adequately express myself other than to laugh.

SarahPLiz · March 2010

I've never seen it, because none of my friends personify their pets in the same way. I guess we are all medicated a bit too well for that.

kaynix21 · March 2010

I don't think it's a great idea, personally.

aggiebug · March 2010

why not just take engagement pictures with them and have them around the reception? or make pictures of your dogs the table markers? then you can show how much they are apart of your lives without having the have them there.

goheels05 · March 2010

Let's try to keep the replies constructive.

maratea · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dogs-wedding-party-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:021d8981-9410-4687-95b7-61208f6788a9Post:bbe31a68-720d-4289-8fc6-fe9d85086048">Re: Dogs in Wedding party????</a>:
[QUOTE]why not just take engagement pictures with them and have them around the reception?Posted by aggiebug[/QUOTE]

H and I did this. And our dog was hard to deal with just during the engagement photos because there were "new people" (photographer), we were outside, so she wanted to chase everything, etc.

I have also been to a wedding where a dog was used in the ceremony... and it turned out bad. The dog was the ring bearer (never give precious jewelry to a dog), and the B&G thought the dog was well-behaved enough to walk calmly down the aisle to give them the rings. Well, no. The dog wanted to visit every person there, and attempted to hump someone's leg. It was kinda funny, but I felt bad for the couple, plus there's that whole "dog carrying your rings, could potentially lose them or eat them thing."
If your ceremony is going to be outside, maybe (and that's a faint maybe) this would work. But if I were at a wedding, I wouldn't want to focus on taking care of a dog, I'd want to watch the ceremony and see how happy the B&G are!

jennyp08 · March 2010

It really depends on the size, setting, and guest list I suppose. Personally, my FI's grandparents would freak if my gigantic chow/german shepard mix came walking down the aisle... plus, my black lab is so not sociable or well behaved enough for this. it would ruin the day.

keep in mind that someone will have to be dog sitting all day, and it means they won't get to enjoy the day as much. I wouldn't be thrilled about being stuck on dog duty instead of being able to enjoy my friend's wedding.

KatyRoseM · March 2010

My Fi and I have 2 dogs, who are therapy dogs, as in they are allowed to go anywhere. However we will not be having them in our wedding because people might not appreciate it, further who is going to look after them? I would not ask someone to do that when they want to be a part of my wedding and love me, and I'm not picking up after them in my dress. In short, no matter how well behaved the dogs are, they are still dogs and do not understand what is happening and cannot be asked to behave as if they do.

deidrababe · March 2010

wow!

I'm honestly in shock at the comments regarding my mental health here!

My dogs are small - NON-Allergenic dogs - with HAIR, not fur - a miniature Schnauzer, my darling Abbie Rose and a Bichon Frise, my sweet Jolee.

I would never put my dog in a costume for my wedding. Dresses are to be custom made for them after a seamstress modifys the original dress to fit them both comfortably.

I have 6 girls bickering over who will be chosen as the dog attendant. In my post, the dog attendant is not to CARE for the dogs and clean up after them, they are to Walk the dogs down the aisle and be a part of my wedding party - this is not an insult by any means.

I guess those who don't "get it" just don't get it and that's okay. I did ask for opinions, I just never thought I would be treated so badly on these boards for asking a question.

I was so excited to be on the Knot and planning my wedding and honestly, I just feel like a big idiot know for expressing some thoughts and asking opinions.

Thank you ladies.

aprovencher21 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dogs-wedding-party-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:021d8981-9410-4687-95b7-61208f6788a9Post:7b2b3451-80be-4de4-a092-224efafce4c8">Re: Dogs in Wedding party????</a>:
[QUOTE] Don;t dress your poor dogs up. Most animals do not like being dressed. Why do you want to make not only your guests but also your pets uncomfortable? This is just a bad idea all around, but you're not going to listen to me anyway, so whatever.
Posted by BlameCanada[/QUOTE]

My dogs love to be dressed up....okay not in full dresses and suits but they do love shirts and sweaters.

But I agree as much as I adore my furbabies....I will not be having them in my wedding. I just don't think it's a good idea.

jena.n.ross · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dogs-wedding-party-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:021d8981-9410-4687-95b7-61208f6788a9Post:3d50095f-f88c-4d22-99f7-7fc4a0b159d6">Re: Dogs in Wedding party????</a>:
[QUOTE]I would never put my dog in a costume for my wedding. Dresses are to be custom made for them after a seamstress modifys the original dress to fit them both comfortably.<div><strong>
</strong></div><div><strong>How do you not consider that a costume?</strong></div><div>
</div><div> I have 6 girls bickering over who will be chosen as the dog attendant. In my post, the dog attendant is not to CARE for the dogs and clean up after them, they are to Walk the dogs down the aisle and be a part of my wedding party - this is not an insult by any means. </div><div><strong>
</strong></div><div><strong>So who will be taking care of the dogs, if not their attendants? </strong></div><div>Posted by deidrababe[/QUOTE]

</div><div>I don't think anyone here was unkind to you... These boards are a wealth of knowledge and frank opinions. May I suggest, in all kindness, that you toughen up a bit. </div>

phoeny_moonstar · March 2010

I had my dog in our ceremony and he did just perfectly fine. We let people know in advance that there was going to be a dog as a groomsman in the ceremony and people thought it was the cutest idea ever. We put people that he knew in the front row in case he got away from his attendant he would immediately go to one of those people first. We also had our DOC keep an eye out for him in case he got lose. Our dog acted like a gentleman the entire night. I don't think that he has ever had so much fun! The kids ran him around the park and the reception place and he got fed and played and petted so much by the time we ran him home he barely wanted to wake up the next morning. Having your pets in your wedding ceremony can be done.

trix1223 · March 2010

I've noticed that the people who claim that their dogs are their "children" usually don't have children. Just saying'.....

pakarufus · March 2010

If you want to do it I say go for it! I know some will take offense at this post but I am an animal person and would rather have animals at my wedding than children. To each his own. As for animals "not liking to wear clothes" my dog will not go outside until I put his coat on him.

Liz4444 · March 2010

you said that your friends want to walk the dogs down the aisle, but who is going to take care of the dogs after that during the ceremony? are you going to take them home?

i think it really depends on the venue, if it's an outdoor venue, like it seems it was for a few posters up... that would be better than an indoor venue. i was at a wedding at a very nice hotel and the bride was carrying her dog instead of a bouquet. the poor little thing, in a poofy pink dress, looked miserable and it was so out of place... the whole thing looked ridiculous.

if it is an indoor wedding, who is going to take the dog out and walk it? i'm assuming that you aren't going to want to leave your reception to walk the dogs and pick up after them in your wedding gown. and while your friends may be so excited to walk your dogs down the aisle, i highly doubt you are going to get that kind of enthusiasm when you ask them to take them for another kind of walk!

my MOH has a 3lb maltese who is her baby... she jokes about Coco walking down the aisle with her! but she pays a good amount of money to her dog walker so that she can go to work, go out at night, etc. i'm not trying to be nasty here, i'm being realistic. if you really want them at the reception, hire a dog walker to be there and take care of them... don't make your friends do the job, and yes, that is a job, not an honor.

futuremrsrichardhall · March 2010

Honestly, I'm kind of shocked at the nastiness in here. I don't think it's a superb idea either, but I don't have dogs.

To the original poster- I'm sorry people responded this way to you. I guess their mothers never taught them "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all." I hope that you will give some other posts a try dispite your experience here. There are some decent people among these boards. I hope you do have your dogs at your wedding and I hope it works out beautifully for you!

To Trixx1223 who said the people who call their pets their "children" usually don't have children.... That girl may have female dogs for children, but at least she isn't a female dog, like you. Just saying.....

ohwhynot · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dogs-wedding-party-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:021d8981-9410-4687-95b7-61208f6788a9Post:865b4ff6-9438-4cb0-a30b-7ff8be6c103f">Re: Dogs in Wedding party????</a>:
[QUOTE]Honestly, I'm kind of shocked at the nastiness in here. I don't think it's a superb idea either, but I don't have dogs. To the original poster- I'm sorry people responded this way to you. I guess their mothers never taught them "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all."<strong> This is a public board. She asked for opinions and got them. She didn't ask only for validation, although that appears to be what she really wanted. People are free to offer their opinions that this is a stupid idea. Often, the harsh responses you get from strangers reflect what others in your life are really thinking, but are afraid to say directly to you. </strong>

I hope that you will give some other posts a try dispite your experience here. There are some decent people among these boards.<strong> No one was indecent. Unless by "indecent" you mean "failing to fawn over an idea they find ludicrous."</strong>

I hope you do have your dogs at your wedding and I hope it works out beautifully for you! To Trixx1223 who said the people who call their pets their "children" usually don't have children.... That girl may have female dogs for children, but at least she isn't a female dog, like you. Just saying..... <strong>And how, exactly, does this fit into your "I guess their mothers never taught them" quote? Please explain. </strong>
Posted by futuremrsrichardhall[/QUOTE]

cukimerrydoll · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dogs-wedding-party-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:021d8981-9410-4687-95b7-61208f6788a9Post:aac5ffb3-fff1-4b8d-8175-cad471daf2c5">Re: Dogs in Wedding party????</a>:
[QUOTE]I'll throw out a reply because I was just a BM in a wedding and the dog was a ring bearer (the Best Man carried the real ring). I must say that little Gizmo, who is normally not the most laid-back of dogs, was a perfectly behaved gentleman (or gentlepup). If they get a little rowdy, someone can scoop them up, I suppose.
Posted by Knot Annie[/QUOTE]
Even in outdoor weddings, this can get tough. What if your dog is too big to pick up?

A friend of mine had his dogs in their ceremony, the one that was small enough to be carried was carried... and she peed on the one holding her during the ceremony. Which gave him a nice cleaning fee for his tux.

CA2MT4EveR · March 2010

is this MUD? I seriously think it leans towards it. Otherwise someone probably has some issues to address

RELAX0X0X0X0 · March 2010

"My dogs are small - NON-Allergenic dogs - with HAIR, not fur - a miniature Schnauzer" There is no such thing as non-allergenic dogs. I am allergic to Schnauzers, Bison Frises, and every other dog that's less likely to cause allergies. It doesn't matter if they have hair or fur, as I'm allergic to their dander... so unless you have a skinless dogs, I'd be SOL at your wedding.

I have extreme pet allergies that cause my trachea to swell and make it hard for me to breathe. If I came to your wedding without warning that there were going to be animals, there would be serious health risks.

While it's your wedding and you're free to do as you please, at least give fair warning to all your guests if you choose to do this.

jenn.daniel · March 2010

Most dogs I've met are better behaved than most children I've encountered. I have pollen allergies and I don't make a fuss about people having flowers at their weddings. It'd be a lot easier to avoid a dog than flowers on every table.

I personally would be honored if I was asked to walk the dog down the aisle. oh, and my best friend had her wedding reception at home, and her parents' dog was there. He was happy and so were all of us guests.

deidrababe · March 2010

Thanks to all of you who have been kind and respectful in your replies regarding my dog and my wedding.

I think what bothered me the most is the poster who questioned my MENTAL HEALTH regarding my thoughts and choice about my dogs being in my wedding.

So, if anyone is stll reading at this point -

Wedding is going to have less than 50 people in attendence.
NOT in a hotel - a small chapel on a military base and MAY be in the Gazebo on site.
Everyonethat will be invited has been to my home and loves my dogs and has no allergies.
Small dogs with hair, rather than fur are used to clothing because they lack and undercoat of fur that keeps them warm. My dogs wear clothing all the time to keep warm (although the dresses are sleeveless!)
My dogs don't have to pee or Poo 100 times a day - they are very well trained and have their potty times pretty well situated - if they did need to go out during our reception, I'd be happy to take them out in my gown and scoop poop - just as if I was a parent and had a diaper wearing age child I would change his or her diaper in my gown as well.

In a nutshell, I don't need anyone's approval to have my girls in my wedding. I just wanted thoughts and opinions, and I got them. I think the poster that said that I'm having strangers give opinions that my friends are probably thinking - well, that may be true......I hope not....but it may be.

Again, thank you all for your thoughts on this subject!

Deeds

Huskerfanz · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_dogs-wedding-party-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:021d8981-9410-4687-95b7-61208f6788a9Post:1d1bb58a-2e13-4634-adfb-9be7b279bc49">Re: Dogs in Wedding party????</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks to all of you who have been kind and respectful in your replies regarding my dog and my wedding. I think what bothered me the most is the poster who questioned my MENTAL HEALTH regarding my thoughts and choice about my dogs being in my wedding. So, if anyone is stll reading at this point - Wedding is going to have less than 50 people in attendence. NOT in a hotel - a small chapel on a military base and MAY be in the Gazebo on site. Everyonethat will be invited has been to my home and loves my dogs and has no allergies. Small dogs with hair, rather than fur are used to clothing because they lack and undercoat of fur that keeps them warm. My dogs wear clothing all the time to keep warm (although the dresses are sleeveless!) My dogs don't have to pee or Poo 100 times a day - they are very well trained and have their potty times pretty well situated - if they did need to go out during our reception, <strong>I'd be happy to take them out in my gown and scoop poop </strong>- just as if I was a parent and had a diaper wearing age child I would change his or her diaper in my gown as well. In a nutshell, I don't need anyone's approval to have my girls in my wedding. I just wanted thoughts and opinions, and I got them. I think the poster that said that I'm having strangers give opinions that my friends are probably thinking - well, that may be true......I hope not....but it may be. Again, thank you all for your thoughts on this subject! Deeds
Posted by deidrababe[/QUOTE]

I honestly don't think you will have time to take care of your dogs during the reception. It's crazy how fast the wedding day goes. Have your dogs ever been around that many people with a lot of activity? How do they act when they are stressed? Even if they are on a schedule, stress can throw that off. What are you going to do with them after you leave the reception? Who is going to provide them with food and water if they are going to be hanging out all day? Somebody is going to have to take care of them and it's not really fair to ask a guest to dog sit. Are you sure that every single person there is not allergic? Have you warned your vendors?

quotequeen · March 2010

I recently attended a wedding with a dog as ring bearer, but it was an outdoor wedding that was a little more casual, and there were a number of odd things about it. I personally would not do this and would raise my eyebrows at anybody who thought it was a good idea for a formal wedding.

deidrababe · March 2010

I think that maybe my wedding is being perceived to be something it is not going to be.

my first wedding was the "big, tons of money, tons of people, tons of oppulance, in a fancy ballroom" wedding.

This wedding will be small, intimate, 50 or less people, NO HUGE BALL ROOM - it may even be a simple reception with cake and punch - not a long affair....small short and sweet.

hopefully all will go well but still very early in the planning stages.

Thank you again for all of your input.

JenniferC2010 · March 2010

I think it's cute to want to include your furbabies but too much of a pain for those attending. I know that my FI would not attend anything with animals (he was attacked twice by dogs as a child and is visibly scared of them now), so that would leave me out too since I wouldn't go without him.

Unless you have informed all of your guests that dogs will be present so that they have the chance to opt out before showing up and exiting swiftly after the processional I'd involve the dogs in another way. I love the idea of doing table cards with their pictures on them. I have two cats that I love to death and wanted to figure out how to bring them into our day and this just might be the ticket for me.

I was also considering (before I knew of the table cards idea) of putting a picture of them in a locket and pinning it inside my dress.

Just as those with children might want to bring them into the ceremony I can see having pets in the ceremony. Just as the tiny ring bearer might have to be drug down the aisle in stunned shock, animals can act out too.

Dogs in Wedding party????

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