Bridesmaid Duty! How many times have you been one?

DanieKA · August 2011

Just got the call (it was actually a letter-Cute!) for bridesmaid duty again. Every time I say that I picture a batman like symbol in the sky, but in the shape of a bouquet or gown silhouette. Haha!

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?

Share your experiences!

DanieKA · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

This will be #5, I think. 1 for a family member, 4 for friends. I've been a MOH once!

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?

I like being in the bridal party. Being the MOH is intense. Lots of planning and work. When I'm just a part of the party I can offer up help, make sure the bride and MOH know how to reach me and kind of wait for instructions. I also like being there early the days leading up to the wedding. I love seeing everything come together, and the anticipation reach a fever pitch, and the bride getting ready the hours before the wedding. I'm kind of a sap for that stuff. It's stuff not everyone gets to see, and I think it's fun.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?

They've all been okay, mostly pretty typically bridal, though I wear them with a smile! It's whatever the bride wants. My favorite came from J.Crew. We got to pick our own style, but all had the same color. I still ended up donating that dress with the others, but my boobs looked excellent in that dress. Haha!

Share your experiences!

I've always dropped a good amount of weight being in anyone's wedding because I don't want to look like sh!t in their pictures. Other people's pictures tend to be a big motivator for me. I lost over 25lbs when I was the MOH for my BF's wedding, so I'm excited to get my @ss in gear. Weird, right!

IrishDreamer · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?
I have been a MOH once, and a bridesmaid twice
Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity? I enjoyed the first two, the last one - the bride was an effing b!tch during the pre-wedding, and during pictures and the reception....she didn't care about anyone (her new sister in law passed out from the heat and not eating all day)
Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?They've all been good....I'll dig up some pics and post later. I got to pick two of them and the third we all wore the same dress, and it was poofier than i would've liked but it was alright
Share your experiences!I usually end up keeping the guys in line and where they are supposed to be (i'm a b!tch and don't take the guys bullying)

motoLyn · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?
3, 1 for my sister, 1 for my sister's friend and now 1 for a college friend.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
For my sister and my sister's friend I didn't really have to do anything but show up and smile. So I don't really count them. As for my college friend, this is a learning experience. Between the bridal shower and bachelorette party in Vegas I'm stretching my budget thin. The BM dresses my sister and her friend paid for mine. I never wore those again. One was long and red and the other was long and dark pink. As for my college friend the dress is knee length and the cut is nice but the color is watermelon. So I highly doubt I will wear that again. At least the dress was just over $100. So far it is a bit stressful but that's because I''m trying to remodel a house and plan my own wedding.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
Refer to above. Bleh. This is the BM dress for my college friend's wedding in December.

orangehills · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?
twice- once for my brother's wedding, and once for a good friend's wedding

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
It was fun... but expensive!

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
Both were actually normal and cute. But I just never had any reason to wear either ever again

NurseyK · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid? Once, last December, and just got asked today to be one for my other very best friend! I'm so excited for them! I still have a sister and another best friend whose weddings I'll be in. Total times in my life expected: 4 (not including any new friends I will make).

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity? Considering I haven't been in so many where it gets annoying, I can honestly say that I loved it. I know people who have been in like 10 weddings.... and they are kinda over being a BM.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
The one and only one I wore was super cute, but I'll never wear it again.

jedoublefdoubles · August 2011

None!

Lol... I'm actually somewhat glad because I hear it can be expensive.

DanieKA · August 2011

Lyn, That dress for your college friends wedding is a really cute cut! I'm with you on the color though. A pink that shade (or watermelon, whatever the bridal industry wants to call it) is really hard to repurpose. It would be awesome in black or navy blue. I'd wear that thing over and over again!

My favorite from J.Crew was this cut, but a different fabric. The best part, they were on clearance! But again, the color was hard to pull off in real life.

DanieKA · August 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_bridesmaid-duty-many-times-one?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:9a6bf6f5-7607-45db-9e39-5b472bff094bPost:59b96dfa-9e5e-4b9c-83ff-8223d1f6c117">Re: Bridesmaid Duty! How many times have you been one?</a>:
[QUOTE]None! Lol... I'm actually somewhat glad because I hear it can be expensive.
Posted by jedoublefdoubles[/QUOTE]

<div>It can be expensive, but it's usually not that bad. The dress is usually the most expensive part, but that's for a local wedding. I was in one that was a destination and the cost of going to the wedding itself was a bit of a stretch (but that was for every guest), on top of the normal expenses of a bridal party. </div><div>
</div><div>But in general, between showers and bachelorette and the wedding, the cost is usually spread out over a few months so it's not one huge chunk at one time. At least that's been my experience (thank heavens!)</div>

SopChick · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

I've only been a bridesmaid twice. Once for my sister, the other for a friend.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?

It was ok I guess. For my sister's wedding I was only 16, so I didn't really get to do any of the super fun stuff (my sister and I are 8 years apart) like hanging out with the wedding party at the bar after the reception. For my friend's wedding, I was sort of an afterthought, so that felt kinda shitty actually, because I knew I wasn't the first choice. I have a really hard time saying no though, so I did it. The friend had a lot of pre-wedding parties, which I thought were excessive. They had 2 Jack&Jills - which I don't particularly agree with in the first place, but 2?! Just seems grabby to me. She also had 3 bridal showers.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?

I've been lucky that the dresses were pretty good. My sister was living in a different province from all the BMs for her wedding, so my mom and I did most of the dress shopping. Basically I got to choose what I wanted to wear, and everyone else had to go with it. I also didn't have to pay for that dress, because I was young, and it was sort of expected that I would be in the WP. The dress for my friend's wedding was pretty, but it was also expensive! I didn't get a say in the dress, and by the time alterations, etc were done, it was about $400! You'd think with all the money from those Jack&Jills that she could have pitched in... jk... kinda.

ETA: the dress we wore for my friend's wedding

**DanieKA - YGPM**

DanieKA · August 2011

Sop, YGPM

Also, that bride sounds crazy! Does one person really need 5 parties to celebrate?!?! Not including the actual wedding. She sounds like a real life AW.

Ember01 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?
3 Times... In my brothers wedding and in 2 other friends weddings

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
Yes and no. My brother's wedding, the girls had all been each other's bridesmaids, so they had it down to a science. My two friends? That was another story. Both times the MOH dropped the ball, and I had to pick up the slack. I planned the entire shower for both girls (and both times the MOH came in and took all the credit).

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
One was cute. We were bubble gum pink A-lilne skirts with ivory tops with a sweetheart neckline.

One was okay. Red, off the shoulder, a-line, with some bead detail in the top.

The third wedding... it was halloween themed. We were dressed as Disney princesses. I went as Cinderella.

Share your experiences!
For the one wedding, I was asked to be a bridesmaid, a looooong time after everyone else. I later found out, the groom asked an additional guy to be a groomsmen, and the bride was scrambling to make things even. In the end, one bridesmaid didn't even show up on the day of the wedding, so the numbers were off anyways. She made up some excuse about her sister had to move that day and she had to help her move.

SopChick · August 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_bridesmaid-duty-many-times-one?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:9a6bf6f5-7607-45db-9e39-5b472bff094bPost:31ff5ef5-7ce9-4854-b2d4-7e3dc0cd22b5">Re: Bridesmaid Duty! How many times have you been one?</a>:
[QUOTE]Sop, YGPM Also, that bride sounds crazy! Does one person really need 5 parties to celebrate?!?! Not including the actual wedding. <strong>She sounds like a real life AW. </strong>
Posted by DanieKA[/QUOTE]
Honestly, I was surprised how much of an AW she became. She isn't normally like that!

The other things that bugged me with her wedding were that her BIL and I ended up doing all the cleanup after the reception, and that no one considered rides for the WP after the reception. The WP that had brought dates were ok, but the BIL (best man) and I were stuck because everyone got outta there while we were cleaning up. He ended up driving the groom's car home (the groom was originally going to pick it up in the morning from the venue) and he gave me a ride too.

**sounds good re:the PM, I'll talk to you tomorrow :)

leia1979 · August 2011

I've only been one once, and it was a lot of fun.

I'll probably only ever be one once more, when/if my MOH gets married.

sparkles88 · August 2011

I just got asked to be a bridesmaid yesterday! It will be my first time being in a wedding, so I am super excited!

tdwpg1984 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid? 1/2 time. I was asked to be a BM at my sister's wedding, and then the wedding didn't end up happening as planned and I didn't get to be a BM after all. It's kind of a long story how things went down in the end. I was a FG once when I was little.
Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity? My sister was kinda bridezillaish so it wasn't all that great, but I think with the right bride it would be fun! There were parts that I was really looking forward to though even with my sister...
Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy? My sister wanted me to wear a gold dress, but I was supposed to pick it out myself, because she wanted me to have a dress that I would wear again. Well no matter what gold dress I picked I'd never wear it again because gold looks awful on me!

Peaseblossom55 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid? twice
Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?It is ok, don't mind it so much, I find the day before and the day of so much more fun
Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy? The two times I was a BM I loved my dresses, both times they were a shade of purple, the brides in both cases were great about being a part of the choosing process to find something we all looked good in.

thejucheidea · August 2011

NONE

! I don't hang around with chicks, so I don't have any female friends except dirty hippies like myself, and my few female friends don't want to get married because they don't believe in the institution of marriage. My one who IS getting married isn't having bridesmaid and it's gonna be in LA anyway, and I don't go into LA when I'm visiting my family in Newport Beach because I'm not getting on the 405.

marleylikeair · August 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_bridesmaid-duty-many-times-one?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:9a6bf6f5-7607-45db-9e39-5b472bff094bPost:78d0ac2a-584c-4878-a72a-f9baf191ccc2">Bridesmaid Duty! How many times have you been one?</a>:
[QUOTE]Just got the call (it was actually a letter-Cute!) for bridesmaid duty again. <strong>Every time I say that I picture a batman like symbol in the sky, but in the shape of a bouquet or gown silhouette. </strong>Haha! How many times have you been a bridesmaid? Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity? Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy? Share your experiences!
Posted by DanieKA[/QUOTE]

<div>I giggled at the bolded part. :)</div><div>
</div><div>I've only been a 'maid once. I was a flower girl twice when I was a kid, though...heh.</div><div>
</div><div>This is the dress we wore for my BFF's wedding:</div><div><a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/8/7/38ccf955-ab4c-4ead-9708-cf89aaab9247.large.png" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '38ccf955-ab4c-4ead-9708-cf89aaab9247', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));" class="PhotoLink"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/8/7/38ccf955-ab4c-4ead-9708-cf89aaab9247.medium.png" alt="" /></a>
</div><div>Not too bad. I felt pretty in it.</div><div>
</div><div>I enjoyed being a bridesmaid. To me, it kinda feels like being in a special club. I'm a dork...</div>

oceana919 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

Twice.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
I've enjoyed being able to stand up for people I care about on such an important day. It's been an honor both times I've done it.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
They haven't been crazy, but I didn't care for either dress I had to wear on me...just didn't work for my body. One of my BMs has mentioned she wants to do the pick-your-own dress (what we did) when her time comes, so I'm looking forward to that.

snorwo3 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

Only one time.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?

It was okay. The bride had family drama and had to get married much earlier than planned.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?

Well, there was lots of drama and it's a long story, but the bride married a Pentecostal guy (basically because they were found out by the church for having sex and forced to marry or be kicked out) and her family was distraught over the engagement and super fast wedding and change of religion. The bride converted to Pentecostal for the groom. Anyway long story short, we had to wear dresses that covered our arms and legs for the church. This can be done in a cute way, but it wasn't. It was not pretty. The dress hasn't been touched since.

Luckily, they let us wear makeup since we weren't the ones who are Pentecostal.

misikes · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?
Once, for my father's (third) remarriage. My step-mom actually asked me to be one of her bridesmaids. I thought it was sweet.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
It was alright, I suppose. The irksome part was going shopping for bridesmaid dresses less than two weeks before the ceremony. It was not the easiest thing trying to find a red dress for a Summer wedding. My step-sisters ended up picking out the dresses from Forever21 and they arrived (in the mail) the DAY before the wedding. Talk about waiting until the last minute!

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
I won't say that I necessarily hated the dresses they picked out, but I do not believe they were at all appropriate for a wedding. My step-sisters (bless their hearts) are really sweet girls, but they're "built" very well, and they like to show every last bit of it off. The dresses were strapless and so short that we couldn't sit down once we put them on, for fear that our "hoohas" would be showing. I, on the other hand, am not very well endowed at all, and the dress was a little too big "upstairs" so I was constantly pulling on it to make sure my bra wasn't showing. (On a side note, my step-sisters are half Filipino, so they have very dark skin, and dark hair. I, on the other hand, take after my father and his German complexion, which is very pale with blonde hair. I stuck out like a sore thumb.)

Share your experiences!
Here's a picture.

csousa1 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

I have been a junior BM once, in my cousin's wedding when I was 13, and I'm a BM in my BFF's wedding in December (pseudo-MOH, because her MOH is her 16 year old sister, so all of the planning falls to me). I'm the MOH in my sister's wedding next year, but that is over a year away.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
So far I am having fun with being my BFF's BM, but it is a little stressful. We all already bought our dresses (in May), which at first I thought was way too early, but now I am relieved that that particular expense is behind me. Now I am trying to plan her bachelorette and shower, and it is fun, but the other BM's are having trouble getting back to me on certain things. My BFF gave me everyone's cell numbers and told me to text them if they don't answer emails, but since the girls didn't give them to me themselves, I am not comfortable texting them. I will stick to email for now!

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?

The junior BM dress (which was the same as all of the other BM dresses), was cute, but very bridal. I never wore it again. The dress for my BFF's wedding is a gorgeous halter that I love. I probably won't have occasion to wear it again unless I get it hemmed, since it is long. It's also a dark red, but I wouldn't be opposed to wearing that color again sometime. My sister is planning to have some form of blue dress, preferably paisley, so I'm hoping we find something amazing next year.

Share your experiences!
Nothing much to report yet. Although, at the wedding I was a JBM in, apparently I looked about 19 to everyone, so guys kept trying to dance with me or flirt with me and my dad nearly had heart failure. I looked much older than I was when I was a young teenager - now I'm 26 and I look about 17. Humph.

wink0erin · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?
Once, for one of my cousins. I was asked to be a BM for one of my other cousins when I was 13 or 14, but my mom shot it down because she didn't want to go to New York for a wedding.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
I LOVED it! I wished I could have attended the pre-wedding stuff though, at the time work was crazy and I had a lot going on so I couldn't make the trip to go to the shower or bach party.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
The dress was super cute AND it had pockets! I doubt I'll ever wear it again but it is sitting in my closet just in case.

Hazel_B · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

Let's see...5. Once for my cousin, twice as MOH and two for friends.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?

Since I live so far away and most of my friends don't like asking for help, it has never been a difficult job. I've always felt honoured that they've included me in their day. The only part I don't like is the sheer expense of it all, it can add up really quickly and all of my brides have never been particularly demanding either.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?

Whenever the bride has allowed me to wear black it has turned out pretty good, but that is because I was able to buy off the rack in a regular store. Aside from that they've been meh. An awful two piece thing in navy that wasn't flattering on anyone...anyone not stick thin looked very boxy and another awful lilac corseted thing....yes you read correctly. This weekend my dress is pretty good, although not sure if I'll wear it again.

heyimbren · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?
This is my first time right now. And it all ends, TOMORROW! Eeek!

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
I have no experience on being a bridesmaid on the actual wedding day but I'm sure it will be beautiful. I'm excited for that.
I have not enjoyed the time before that. But then again, maybe my experience in this one isn't typical? I think I'm just exhausted from wedding talk. It's been going on for nearly 2 years now (there was pre-planning).

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
I only have this one- which is just a yellow sundress. It really isn't that flattering on me, but it isn't terrible either. Plus it was really cheap, and with the money I saved I'd wear anything.

Share your experiences!
I'm actually unsure if I'd ever want to do this again, for anyone. I LOVE the part about a good friend getting married, and being happy. And I can't wait to stand up with her on her wedding day tomorrow. But I really, truly loathed the months beforehand. But I wonder if I'm just a bad friend who isn't sympathetic enough. Ask me about this after tomorrow aha.

peekaboo2011 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid? I was a Junior BM once, for my mom's BFF.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
I hated it, actually. TK was not around when she got married, and I was 10 or 11. The Planner/Coordinator/Whoever ran the rehearsal kept calling me a flower girl. I ran out of the rehearsal sobbing because I was too old to be a flower girl and WHY COULDN'T SHE JUST GET IT RIGHT?! The bride eventually came out and got me and told me she was just a big old meanie head, and she'd be talking to her later.
Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy? Eh. It was okay. The bride's mom made everyone's dresses, so I think my parents saved a good chunk of money. But the dress was dupioni silk or something else, and wasn't very awesome fabric. It was super scratchy. I wish I had pictures. They were a not so pretty lilac. I did get to keep the Longaberger basket that my flowers were in though, so I guess that's a plus!
Share your experiences!
I think, looking back on how I felt, I'll never make the mistake of having a "junior BM." Seriously. It was really hurtful that the coordinator couldn't get her shiit together and figure it out, especially when the flower girls were half my age. Ugh.

Elle1036 · August 2011

I've never been a bridesmaid. It kinda makes me sad.

sarebear25 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

Once (family friend), plus flower girl duty when I was little

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
It was pretty fun, but I was still in undergrad at the time, 2 hrs away, so I missed out on almost everything other than reherasal dinner/ the actual wedding

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?

Actually it was a really pretty dress- practical, even- but it was petite, and i'm tall, so it's a bit too short on me

Share your experiences!
My high school job was playing harp for people's weddings, so it was really nice to be part of a wedding for someone I actually knew

Except the bride couldn't decide if she wanted me to play harp or be a BM, so I did both- walked down the aisle to a pianist, then sat down and played for the bride's walk. Surpisingly, that worked well

niknik15 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

I was a biridesmaid in my FSIL's wedding this past summer. I stood at my dad's second marriage (13). I was the only one up there and I felt a little akward. I was a flower girl at my mom's wedding (6).

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
I feel like I've only been a maid only once and it was a relatively good experience. I wish she would have asked for more help with stuff. I kinda felt useless.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?

I liked the dress I wore this past summer, although I doubt if I will ever wear it again. It is a weird material. We got them from Ann Taylor. My favorite part were the pockets

Here is the pic.

I think I wore my stepmom's black leather skirt and a white shirt to my dad's wedding. Like I said, I felt very akward.

jemmini6 · August 2011

How many times have you been a bridesmaid?
Twice, I was a BM for each of my sisters.

Do you enjoy it or is it not your favorite activity?
Because it was for my sisters, it was fun and they weren't bitches about it, but the money involved would make me not want to do it for anyone unless we were super close.

Any truly good dresses you've been asked to wear, or have they all been crazy?
They were both okay, nothing I'd ever wear again though, obviously. This was my first sister's dress:

And this was my second sister's dress:

Bridesmaid Duty! How many times have you been one?

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