DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests

rlavach · July 2012

Just wondering how the E-board feels on this. An acquaintance is invited to a DW and was told that if they don't stay at the resort, there is a $100 fee. I've heard that on here & unfortunately it's becoming more common. The guest feels that the B&G should pay this fee & that the guest shouldn't be responsible for it.

What does the E-board say?

aragx6 · July 2012

If the couple chooses to do this, I am very much in the camp that feels they need to pay it.

ericaandtom2012 · July 2012

I think the couple should pay for it as well. It's part of properly hosting their guests.

kcscejal · July 2012

I think the bride and groom should be responsible for the fee. I shouldn't have to pay an entrance fee to a wedding just for staying somewhere different.

rlavach · July 2012

I have a hard time understanding that. So what about the guests that decide to stay in the resort. Wouldn't they feel short changed that those who got to stay elsewhere got their fee paid for. Like, 'damn, if I would've known I would've stayed somewhere else too!' I guess it's just me.

Mrs.B6302007 · July 2012

I remember a thread about this within the last couple of years. That's the only time I've ever heard of non-guest charges. My vote is for the B&G to cover it since it's an entrance fee.

Mrs.B6302007 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-resorts-that-charge-fees-for-non-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5acb0120-f772-47de-9f41-170b31236a68Post:4c831403-2a9b-494d-b70c-075b4f1318ef">Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests</a>:
[QUOTE]I have a hard time understanding that. So what about the guests that decide to stay in the resort. Wouldn't they feel short changed that those who got to stay elsewhere got their fee paid for. Like, 'damn, if I would've known I would've stayed somewhere else too!' I guess it's just me.
Posted by rlavach[/QUOTE]

They're probably getting a lot of inclusions though that offset that $100.00

aragx6 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-resorts-that-charge-fees-for-non-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5acb0120-f772-47de-9f41-170b31236a68Post:4c831403-2a9b-494d-b70c-075b4f1318ef">Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests</a>:
[QUOTE]I have a hard time understanding that. So what about the guests that decide to stay in the resort. Wouldn't they feel short changed that those who got to stay elsewhere got their fee paid for. Like, 'damn, if I would've known I would've stayed somewhere else too!' I guess it's just me.
Posted by rlavach[/QUOTE]

But the ones who stay on the resort choose to do so (most likely at a higher cost) because they want to be on the resort. I don't really see how they're short changed.

achiduck · July 2012

I very much feel the B&G need to cover that fee. As a guest, if I had just spent how much money on travel and my hotel and showed up for the wedding only to be asked to fork over another $100 I'd probably be pretty pissed.

kcscejal · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-resorts-that-charge-fees-for-non-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5acb0120-f772-47de-9f41-170b31236a68Post:4c831403-2a9b-494d-b70c-075b4f1318ef">Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests</a>:
[QUOTE]I have a hard time understanding that. So what about the guests that decide to stay in the resort. Wouldn't they feel short changed that those who got to stay elsewhere got their fee paid for. Like, 'damn, if I would've known I would've stayed somewhere else too!' I guess it's just me.
Posted by rlavach[/QUOTE]
The couple doesn't get to dictate where the guest's stay, period. If that means they have to pay fees for every guest that stays somewhere else, oh well. DW are really expensive to attend. Guests have the right to choose to stay where they want/can afford without having to worry about paying to get into the wedding.

jessicabessica · July 2012

I think the couple should prearrange with the resort to cover these fees for any guests that will incur them. IMO, that's a cost the couple should budget for when they decided on a venue like that. I have never been to an all-inclusive resort and had never heard of these fees until reading about them here, but it just seems outrageous to charge the guests of a wedding for coming onto the property like that.

Mrs.B6302007 · July 2012

I'm not a big fan of resort DWs. If I'm working hard to save money for a vacation then I don't want to have to change my plans from say, Ireland to Jamaica for a DW wedding. If I was planning on going somewhere tropical anyway then it might work out where I can combine the wedding and my vacation but most likely, I'm going to have to chose between my own vacation or the DW when it comes to budgeting. If I can swing both trips (or just the DW at all if I'm not vacationing anywhere else), the DW is probably going to have to be low budget which means staying off site of the resort. Because the B&G are doing a DW at the location THEY chose and at a resort THEY chose, if I have to really stretch my money in order to attend at all and stay in a less expensive place, I shouldn't be charged an additional fee to actually attend the wedding because I couldn't afford to stay at the more expensive place. To me, B&G should be thrilled that people can attend DWs at all because a lot of us are having to really be budget conscious.

rlavach · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-resorts-that-charge-fees-for-non-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5acb0120-f772-47de-9f41-170b31236a68Post:bc33237f-7edf-4578-99ec-6fd3181750f6">Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests</a>:
[QUOTE]I think the couple should prearrange with the resort to cover these fees for any guests that will incur them. IMO, that's a cost the couple should budget for when they decided on a venue like that. I have never been to an all-inclusive resort and had never heard of these fees until reading about them here, <strong>but it just seems outrageous to charge the guests of a wedding for coming onto the property like that. </strong>
Posted by jessicabessica[/QUOTE]
Agreed. I think it's totally ridiculous and never heard of it until TK.

msuprincess04 · July 2012

I feel like it is up to the guests to cover it. If they choose to stay elsewhere then they choose to pay the fee. It's no different then having a wedding at a hotel that has a pay for parking lot. Parking isn't free. And those that choose to attend the wedding and drive will need to cover their own fee. Those who choose otherwise, choose not to pay the fee.

jessicabessica · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-resorts-that-charge-fees-for-non-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5acb0120-f772-47de-9f41-170b31236a68Post:5c1001e5-d733-452e-bbbe-4205f04e5fea">Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests</a>:
[QUOTE]I feel like it is up to the guests to cover it. If they choose to stay elsewhere then they choose to pay the fee. It's no different then having a wedding at a hotel that has a pay for parking lot. Parking isn't free. And those that choose to attend the wedding and drive will need to cover their own fee. Those who choose otherwise, choose not to pay the fee.
Posted by msuprincess04[/QUOTE]

Actually, if your venue has paid parking, it's really best if you cover it for your guests. True, you don't pay for their gas or their airfare, but once they arrive at your wedding, they shouldn't be paying for things themselves.

Summer2011Bride · July 2012

As far as the parking, I feel if the venue the B&G chose charges for parking in their lot, the B&G should cover that too.
And for the resort, I agree the couple should be paying. It's outrageous that they even charge $100 (per person?) to attend a wedding at their resort when they are already getting so much money from having a wedding there to begin with. I think just because a couple wants to or can only afford a cheaper resort doesn't mean they should be stuck paying an entrance fee. At any other venue, i think people would agree an entrance fee should be covered by the B&G, so why not here?

Kate61487 · July 2012

I'm thinking this is kind of like the cruise wedding posted about a few months ago - the B&G aren't really paying for their wedding reception (except maybe a room fee) b/c all the guests are already paying for all their food. The $100 probably covers the outside guest's meal, as well as drinks and such as Duds pointed out. I could be wrong, maybe the B&G are still paying a per plate cost, but I doubt it. The B&G should absolutely pick up the $100 fee or choose a different venue.

AdeleDazeem · July 2012

I haven't read the rest of the reponses but I think this is so amazingly crappy of the bride and groom. They choose to get married at an all-inclusive because it's cheaper for them and then BAM! the guests have to pay a fee. But, what do they care? They're wedding is cheaper!

Sorry - it really makes me angry. The bride and groom should pay this fee for all guests, full stop.

boomboom1243 · July 2012

Yea i dont think the bride and groom should pay for it at all. thats like having the bride and groom pay for your parking(i see the bride above did but ive never been to one where if i did have to pay they paid for it) if you are wanting to go to their wedding you are either going to say in the resort or stay around it. and the only reason why someone would stay at a different resort is cuz its cheaper so if its still cheaper with the extra fee included thats on the guests its their choice.

WELLL i just read a post and it made me think.. if the bride and groom arnt paying for the food of the guests and its the hotel that charges it so they can eat at the reception and drink they BETTER cover that fee. i think it all depends on what the fee covers.

AdeleDazeem · July 2012

oh, and to the parking point above? We paid for valet parking for every guest that drove to our AHR. That's what you do when you host - you don't be a d*ck.

Summer2011Bride · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-resorts-that-charge-fees-for-non-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5acb0120-f772-47de-9f41-170b31236a68Post:1ad075f8-4742-4efa-9dd1-b2010a09b214">Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests : <strong>They can't really police non-resort guests once they are on the resort and AIs have food/beverages available everywhere you go. They don't have people to escort them to the wedding location and make sure they don't stray. It's not fair to the people staying and paying for the AI aspect that a bunch of wedding guests can just show up and hit the bars for free before/after the wedding. </strong> I don't have a problem with resorts charging the $100 "one day pass" fee, but the think the couple needs to pick up the tab on it.
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

I guess I was assuming the cost for having a reception at the resort (you mentioned possibly $7000 for the B&G to have it there) would have taken those kind of things into consideration (guests drinking for free, etc). If not, then I agree with you.

pkontk · July 2012

The bride and groom should be responsible for a 'cover'. Why don't the AI resorts have a way to make sure that non-resort guests have a way to pay for food and drinks separate from the wedding? I'm more than happy to pay for a drink or two prior to a DW at an AI resort if I'm not staying there. But $100 is a LOT of money to ask someone to pay just to get into your wedding.

aragx6 · July 2012

What about in places where free parking is nonexistent? Like Chicago or New York?

I think it's kind to pay for parking, but I can't say I'm convinced it's necessary if (and only if!) you live in a place where paying for parking is always expected. If I was invited to a wedding in downtown Chicago I would take public transit or take a cab because I'd expect to pay to park, KWIM? In a place like that I feel like parking is a luxury because guests have plenty of other options.

TheSlowskys · July 2012

I think the parking situation is completely different, and having your guests have to pay to get onto the property where your wedding is being held is not acceptable in any way, shape or form.

Guests at a DW are already paying for air and hotel, and to get charged an admission fee would absolutely p*ss me off to no end. If I am reading it right, it is $100 pp, so a couple would be charged $200? That is just mind boggling to me. Imagine this was a zoo or public park or something with an admission fee, would anyone be ok with the B&G having their guests pay to get in?

I hadn't realized DW venues may do this, but I would think it would be a negotiable point and something to consider and budget for before booking.

BostonGIrl4732 · July 2012

I think the B&G should pay the $100 fee. I also don't think the guest should even be told about it. If your closest friends and family are spending all that money to fly somewhere and stay at a resort, they shouldn't have to pay to get in to the wedding itself.

There are plenty of reasons not to stay at a specific resort and not all of them have to do with money. Some resorts are more child-friendly than others, some people are beach people and some are pool people (something to consider if it's also going to be your vacation for the year), some people like certain foods and pick a resort based on the restaurants, etc. Other people like to stay at a specific resort because they've stayed there before.

rlavach · July 2012

So if the B&G are to cover the fee, then I wonder about the logistics of it. For example, how do the B&G know who is staying out of the resort? Most people don't report back to them to let them know where they'd be. They'd somehow have to let guests know that they need to know if they're staying on/off site so they can arrange for the fee to be paid? That would be so awkward. I guess that's what they get for picking a place like that.

thurmanpowell · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-resorts-that-charge-fees-for-non-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5acb0120-f772-47de-9f41-170b31236a68Post:c3c6fa82-63cd-4f09-8e9d-bf8ceba64a75">Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I'm not a big fan of resort DWs. If I'm working hard to save money for a vacation then I don't want to have to change my plans from say, Ireland to Jamaica for a DW wedding. If I was planning on going somewhere tropical anyway then it might work out where I can combine the wedding and my vacation but most likely, I'm going to have to chose between my own vacation or the DW when it comes to budgeting.</strong> If I can swing both trips (or just the DW at all if I'm not vacationing anywhere else), the DW is probably going to have to be low budget which means staying off site of the resort. Because the B&G are doing a DW at the location THEY chose and at a resort THEY chose, if I have to really stretch my money in order to attend at all and stay in a less expensive place, I shouldn't be charged an additional fee to actually attend the wedding because I couldn't afford to stay at the more expensive place. To me, B&G should be thrilled that people can attend DWs at all because a lot of us are having to really be budget conscious.
Posted by Mrs.B6302007[/QUOTE]

That's exactly how I feel too (although, I'll expand that to any out of the country weddings). That's soooo much to ask of a guest.

dumdumfroggie · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dw-resorts-that-charge-fees-for-non-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5acb0120-f772-47de-9f41-170b31236a68Post:67c6fa48-893d-420a-8de1-73e40eaf6c9a">Re: DW Resorts that Charge Fees for Non-Guests</a>:
[QUOTE]So if the B&G are to cover the fee, then I wonder about the logistics of it. For example, how do the B&G know who is staying out of the resort? Most people don't report back to them to let them know where they'd be. They'd somehow have to let guests know that they need to know if they're staying on/off site so they can arrange for the fee to be paid? That would be so awkward. I guess that's what they get for picking a place like that.
Posted by rlavach[/QUOTE]

<div>I would assume the resort would have some way of checking people off when they come in and then billing the B&G.</div>

LiLe422 · July 2012

The AI I am getting married at charges a $100 day-pass fee for guests not staying at the resort. There is also a cheaper ($25 or so) fee for the ceremony and reception only. If I was having guests at my wedding, I would absolutely pick up the ceremony-reception fee. If the guests wanted a entire day-pass, I would think the guests would be responsible for the fee (minus the $25 ceremony-reception fee I would pay.)
But like a pp mentioned the day-pass is access to the all amenities/restaurant/bars the entire day.
Also, at my AI a wedding with guests IS NOT free. It costs extra money to have a ceremony and reception.

aragx6 · July 2012

We went to a DW and they just asked us to send them our travel itinerary so they'd know who was arriving when and where we were staying. There were only about 40 people -- most of them couples -- and all close friends or family so it wasn't a big deal.

jemmini6 · July 2012

I don't think parking fees and admittance fees are even in the same category. For me, parking falls under 'guest travel expense', which is nice if the B&G can cover it, but not necessary. An admittance fee to even attend the wedding should fall under 'B&G venue expense'.

Besides, paying />$20 per car for parking (up to 8 people in the car depending on the type) is A LOT different than paying $100 per person just to walk into the venue.

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