Diamonds only?

Caitlinmmk · December 2010

Not really an ettiquette question, just something I was thinking about and you girls are pretty awesome so I thought I'd ask you

I don't understand why diamonds are considered the only stone for wedding rings. I personally would prefer something that has color. The price of diamonds is rediculously inflated and I've heard of plenty of people paying for diamonds, but not getting real diamonds. Does anyone know why diamonds are considered the only kind of stone you should get for a wedding ring and if you could pick a different kind of stone what would it be?

Simply Fated · December 2010

"Diamonds are forever."

or so the ad says.

It was started as a fashion statement and didn't become common until the 20th century as engagement rings.

Personally, I prefer Anne's ring from the Anne of Green Gables series. She refused a diamond ring because the first time she saw one, she was disapoointed by it's lack of color. She imagined it to look more like an amethyst. So she requested a ring made of pearl to represent the happy tears she shed.

shortee426 · December 2010

There are plenty of women wearing e-rings that are not diamond these days. One of my good friends was given a ring that was a diamond center stone with amethyst (I think...is that the birthstone for February?) sidestones.

Me personally? I am a diamond girl. 100%. I seriously thanked my parents once for giving birth to me in April (because diamond is that month's birthstone).

aMrsin09 · December 2010

I have an antique three stone sapphire ring as an e-ring.

It's "traditional" because DeBeers has an awesome marketing department ;-)

stephasuasu · December 2010

Supply and demand! That is why they are so expensive, and DeBeers controls the marketplace....They are actually geniuses when it comes to their marketing plan, they took something worth nothing and created and empire. While diamonds are clear, some shapes really do sparkle! Other colors are pretty as well. Get what suits you!

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_diamonds-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:66db3b46-adb6-4c0c-bd8f-eeeb6fa85236Post:a84ed00e-f675-4ac0-98db-1bd6148895f7">Re: Diamonds only?</a>:
[QUOTE]I have an antique three stone sapphire ring as an e-ring. It's "traditional" because DeBeers has an awesome marketing department ;-)
Posted by aMrsin09[/QUOTE]

<div>This. The DeBeers corporation (owns basically all the diamond mines in South Africa) marketed diamond rings in the early 20th century to all men who were proposing. </div><div>
</div><div>At first, the were meant as sort of insurance - an engagement was very serious, and women who were engaged, but then had it broken off were sometimes seen as "tarnished." So in theory, she could sell the ring and have some money if another man wouldn't marry her. So her parents liked the idea of not having to support her and women liked the idea of a pretty ring.</div><div>
</div><div>The price of diamonds IS ridiculously inflated, also by DeBeers. They're much more common than some other stones, and what the price would have you believe. </div><div>
</div><div>FWIW, my mom has an emerald engagement ring.</div>

sarah0725 · December 2010

I don't have a diamond. Neither did Princess Di (or the soon to be Princess Kate, for that matter). Do what you want.

NatandIsaac · December 2010

Msmery- cool info; I had no idea.

thesuninherhead · December 2010

I have to echo the others: diamonds aren't any more 'traditional' to engagement rings than iphones are to mobile phones.

[Deleted User] · December 2010

There are many women who get engaged with a stone other than a diamond these days. And it is perfectly okay.

Mary Susan and Chris · December 2010

I don't have a diamond. My is a Tanznaite with diamonds around it. I did not want a diamond, and FI knew that so he listened and got me something different. The only problem we had was finding a band to fit with my e ring. But Kay Jewelers worked with us and we got a beautiful one.
The reason I didn't want a diamond is that I am an only daughter and granddaughter and I got my grandmothers diamonds...so I wanted something different.

lyndausvi · December 2010

There are plenty of woman who do not have a diamond engagement ring.

I have a diamond for a few reasons. (1) My MIL gave us the diamond and (2) I would rather wear a neutral colored ring everyday than a colored stone. (3) diamonds are harder stones and can hold up to my everyday use.

It's only a preference, it's not like the police are going around making sure your engagement ring is a diamond.

Mary Susan - be careful with wearing the Tanzanite ring everyday. It's a softer stone than other gems. I have one and it chipped one day washing dishes

Pirata13 · December 2010

I know several people with other gemstone e-rings. My cousin has an emerald. I have my grandmother's e-ring, but if I didn't have that, I most likely would have had a sapphire.

Rosie109 · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_diamonds-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:66db3b46-adb6-4c0c-bd8f-eeeb6fa85236Post:07b641ad-a601-4021-a224-e6f2cc58ac4c">Re: Diamonds only?</a>:
[QUOTE]There are plenty of woman who do not have a diamond engagement ring. I have a diamond for a few reasons. (1) My MIL gave us the diamond and (2) I would rather wear a neutral colored ring everyday than a colored stone. (3) diamonds are harder stones and can hold up to my everyday use. It's only a preference, <strong>it's not like the police are going around making sure your engagement ring is a diamond</strong>. Mary Susan - be careful with wearing the Tanzanite ring everyday. It's a softer stone than other gems. I have one and it chipped one day washing dishes
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

<div>Not true. You better have documentation about your engagement ring if you live in Arizona. </div>

lyndausvi · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_diamonds-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:66db3b46-adb6-4c0c-bd8f-eeeb6fa85236Post:7c66b4d7-b80f-46e6-935c-9be4ee079edc">Re: Diamonds only?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Diamonds only? : Not true. You better have documentation about your engagement ring if you live in Arizona.
Posted by Rosie109[/QUOTE]

<img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" />

MrsMLRB · December 2010

My mother has an aquamarine engagement ring (her birthstone and a stone from Brazil, which has significance to my parents). It is gorgeous.

I wanted a colored gemstone ring (maybe sapphire) but my parents had a diamond that belonged to my grandmother and great-grandmother which we used as the center stone for my ring. I love it because it has significance in my family. Otherwise I would not have a diamond engagement ring.

marissa_claire · December 2010

I'll be honest: I know some girls who only want diamonds because of the $$ value that's attached to them. I think there probably exist some circles where diamonds are the only way to go so that you can judge your friends and their wealth. I'm hardly saying it's okay, but I know people that are of that opinion.

I actually think that with soon-to-be Princess Kate's ring, other stones will become a more popular choice.

Calypso1977 · December 2010

you can have any type of ring you want or even no ring at all.

the only downside to having another type of ring is the ignorant comments you get. my best friend has a solitaire sapphire in a platinum setting. when she got engaged, people did the typical "where's the ring" and she'd show her hand, and theyd be really confused and say "no, your engagement ring" and she'd say "this is my engagemetn ring" and they would just have a really dumb look on their face and some even went as far as to say "he didnt get you a diamond?".

andy71781 · December 2010

yeah I'll second calypso - some people are pretty ignorant. But I love love love my ring and I know how much it cost and he didn't buy it to be cheap. Nobody else posted pics...but I'll do it.

Calypso1977 · December 2010

andy, why is it on your right hand?

ehathewa · December 2010

I think some of it has to do with how hard diamonds are. They are a 10 (hardest) on Moh's scale. Sapphires and Rubys are a 9. Anything else isn't as resistant to scratching as it might need to be for a lifetime of wear. http://gemologyonline.com/mohs.html

missy68 · December 2010

I also have a colored stone as both an engagement ring and a wedding band. They are both sapphires, which I chose because they were the stone not only for J's birth month, but also the month in which we were getting married. My ering stone is smaller than others, but it matches perfectly in color and goes with the style of the wedding band which has 34 smaller sapphires and diamonds in between them.
Sapphires were also the traditional stone given a long time ago, and as mentioned before, it is what Diana and now Kate have received.

shortee426 · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_diamonds-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:66db3b46-adb6-4c0c-bd8f-eeeb6fa85236Post:d1652253-1884-4fda-9577-44bd0a956e59">Re: Diamonds only?</a>:
[QUOTE]yeah I'll second calypso - some people are pretty ignorant. But I love love love my ring and I know how much it cost and he didn't buy it to be cheap. Nobody else posted pics...but I'll do it. :)
Posted by andy71781[/QUOTE]

<div>That's a really pretty ring, Andy. But we wanted to see your engagement ring.</div><div>
</div><div>;-)</div>

Cynthia1207 · December 2010

It's perfectly fine to have another stone than a diamond. I have a diamond and wouldn't have it any other way. I just love the look of it and as PPs have said, it's the most resistant stone so I know I don't have to worry about it getting scratched. Plus it's italian tradition to give a diamond. Diamond engagement rings actually started very early in the 1400's in Italy.

The Mel and Todd Show · December 2010

Andy! We have the same e ring! Mine is a yellow sapphire, not blue, but same setting. We're awesome

I'll ditto what pps said about ignorant people. When I show people, they say "oh, is that a canary diamond?" and when I say "no, it's a yellow sapphire" they make a face that clearly indicates that a) they don't know how much sapphires cost and b) they think I was cheated out of a diamond. When you explain that you don't like diamonds to these people, they will assume you are lying.

Bubbalub · December 2010

I believe that in the UK sapphire engagement rings are more common than diamonds.(Don't quote me on that, though!) I love colored stones and would have been ecstatic with a sapphire of any color but I am even more thrilled with the diamond in my ring because my MIL gave my H her own diamond ring to use. She told him to take the diamond out of her ring and have it set in something I would love so he did and it is absolutely stunning.

My friend is a master goldsmith and he advises against emerald rings of any kind because emerald is so brittle and is extremely likely to chip or crack. That makes me sad because emerald is my birthstone and I would love one in a cocktail ring. Oh well.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_diamonds-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:66db3b46-adb6-4c0c-bd8f-eeeb6fa85236Post:d4d74cb7-abe2-4272-8bc4-d4f0966f8852">Re: Diamonds only?</a>:
[QUOTE]It's perfectly fine to have another stone than a diamond. I have a diamond and wouldn't have it any other way. I just love the look of it and as PPs have said, it's the most resistant stone so I know I don't have to worry about it getting scratched. Plus it's italian tradition to give a diamond. Diamond engagement rings actually started very early in the 1400's in Italy.
Posted by Cynthia1207[/QUOTE]

They've been around, they're just more ubiquitous now.

But I think it's coming around again - people are getting the rings they want rather than what is traditional or what you're supposed to do.

NuggetBrain · December 2010

Noodle, bless his heart, is very traditional when it comes to jewelry and accessories. So even if I had of wanted something other than a diamond as an e-ring I think I still would have ended up with a diamond as an e-ring. And I love it - he got me the exact style and setting I wanted and it fit perfectly into my wedding ring.

adrop · December 2010

I've seen some gorgeous pictures of rings with pearls in them. But I have a diamond and I love it. I think sapphires are gorgeous too though. My friend recently got engaged and has a champagne coloured diamond, it's gorgeous!

run2bfree · December 2010

Diamonds are a DIME A DOZEN~ I say boo on getting a store stocked ring. blah blah now you can be cookie cutter like all the other brides out there!

I am think its lame if the bride to be picks out her ring.

My fiancee designed my ring and had a sapphire imported, untreated, from SriLanka. not bragging - I am just saying his effort and originality goes way farther than Jareds and all the social pressure rings...

Get something FUN, unique and that represents HIM - as the ring is supposed to be a SYMBOL of HIS LOVE TO YOU.

Below are our rings.

NuggetBrain · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_diamonds-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:66db3b46-adb6-4c0c-bd8f-eeeb6fa85236Post:d092dd6c-00d3-465b-a223-4ea01be06e02">Re: Diamonds only?</a>:
[QUOTE]Diamonds are a DIME A DOZEN~ I say boo on getting a store stocked ring. <strong>blah blah now you can be cookie cutter like all the other brides out there! I am think its lame if the bride to be picks out her ring.</strong> My fiancee designed my ring and had a sapphire imported, untreated, from SriLanka. <strong>not bragging - I am just saying his effort and originality goes way farther than Jareds and all the social pressure rings</strong>... Get something FUN, unique and that represents HIM - as the ring is supposed to be a SYMBOL of HIS LOVE TO YOU. Below are our rings.
Posted by run2bfree[/QUOTE]

Wow. You sound like kind of a b*tch. Way to be judgemental. And yes, you totally were bragging, you heifer. Don't front.

Diamonds only?

Re: Diamonds only?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards