moissanite ring question

beatlesgirl25 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:0df83a88-8f4e-49c4-9300-57cd1034a092">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]Beatles, i also don't understand the obsession with meat flavored soy. If meat is so yummy, eat meat. If eating meat is evil, then I would think you wouldn't want to have anything to do with something that resembles flesh in taste, look or texture. It think the idealism gets skewed when you carve into a Tofurky at Thanksgiving, feeding into the idea that turkey tastes great, but you should never eat actually eat it. I just don't get that.
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

This is a good point. And I think within the realm of objecting to meat for moral reasons, it can seem bizarre that people go to such lengths to make non-meat look like meat.

That said, not all vegetarians choose that diet for moral reasons. I think it makes perfect sense for vegetarians who are meat-free for health reasons to want to have the same kinds of food as meat-eaters, even if it's just pretend. Most vegetarians I know became this way in late adolescence/early adulthood, once they became informed on the subject and better able to make choices for themselves and their lifestyles. But they grew up on hot dogs and Thanksgiving turkey and Christmas ham, and have sentimental and traditional ties to this type of food.

I don't judge people for wanting some semblance of what they've known all their lives and what foods make them happy to see. If you grow up loving something and then learn more about it and realize it comes from a "bad place," I think it makes sense to use alternatives like tofurkey at Thanksgiving so you can have the best of both worlds. Not everything has to be a moral statement of one's beliefs. Sometimes you just want some fake turkey.

ETA: Actually, this whole argument also applies to the diamond debate. Please consider it as such.

MandK9 · May 2011

I actually think Tofurkey tastes gross, but my poor mother was devastated when I decided I wasn't eating turkey at Thanksgiving anymore. So this gives her at least a little sense of how she thinks it should be.

But I seriously love my fake burgers and chicken wings. And I had absolutely not a clue that people were judging me for it. Oh well.

SarahPLiz · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:b9f13af3-aed0-43de-bdc3-5f09b7ff6e12">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : This is a good point. And I think within the realm of objecting to meat for moral reasons, it can seem bizarre that people go to such lengths to make non-meat look like meat. That said, not all vegetarians choose that diet for moral reasons. I think it makes perfect sense for vegetarians who are meat-free for health reasons to want to have the same kinds of food as meat-eaters, even if it's just pretend. Most vegetarians I know became this way in late adolescence/early adulthood, once they became informed on the subject and better able to make choices for themselves and their lifestyles. But they grew up on hot dogs and Thanksgiving turkey and Christmas ham, and have sentimental and traditional ties to this type of food. I don't judge people for wanting some semblance of what they've known all their lives and what foods make them happy to see. If you grow up loving something and then learn more about it and realize it comes from a "bad place," I think it makes sense to use alternatives like tofurkey at Thanksgiving so you can have the best of both worlds. Not everything has to be a moral statement of one's beliefs. Sometimes you just want some fake turkey.
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]
I don't judge people for it, I just don't understand it at all. People can make their own decisions.

number55 · May 2011

I eat meat and I still like veggie burgers better at least 80% of the time. Esp. at A&W. mmm.

MandK9 · May 2011

A&W has veggie burgers?!? Awesome. I think I'll go, like, today.

beatlesgirl25 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:b3044164-dac4-4265-a309-be8927169cce">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : I don't judge people for it, I just don't understand it at all. People can make their own decisions.
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

Fair enough. I just read your "if meat is so yummy, eat meat" statement as kind of judgey. I think you and I know it's more complicated than that for people opposed to eating meat. I was also thinking of it in the context of your diamond argument.

Also, thanks for your input MandK. ;) I'm not a vegetarian so I was hoping some people who were could provide their insight instead of me blathering on about it!

[Deleted User] · May 2011

I wouldn't give two fucks about someone trying to pass off a moissanite ring as a diamond. It's not mine. It has absolutely no impact on my life. Why the hell would I care?

SarahPLiz · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:30b0a939-f07f-4f40-9137-edd2d425f58a">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : Fair enough. I just read your "if meat is so yummy, eat meat" statement as kind of judgey. I think you and I know it's more complicated than that for people opposed to eating meat. I was also thinking of it in the context of your diamond argument. Also, thanks for your input MandK. ;) I'm not a vegetarian so I was hoping some people who were could provide their insight instead of me blathering on about it!
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]
I get that. I know people are opposed to eating meat for various reasons (religious, nutritional, etc), but the majority of vegetarians and vegans I know are opposed for moral reasons. That's why the fake meat doesn't make sense to me.

TheCranberry · May 2011

SarahP, I think we are saying the same thing. You having a "clean" diamond because you don't want your money going to the conflict diamond trade is the same to me as someone having a moissanite stone because they don't want their money going to the conflict diamond trade. The fact that they chose moissanite doesn't make them any better or worse than you having a "clean" diamond.

I don't really get your point on the meat thing though. If someone is a vegetarian because they don't want to kill animals, how does eating a soy burger or soy bacon make them a hypocrite? No animals were killed to make the food so their goal is met right? Liking the taste of bacon and eating a non-animal substitute doesn't change the fact that you haven't killed a pig. It's the same thing with fake fur or polyesther fiber instead of wool. No animals were harmed so how is that being hypocritical? Maybe I am misunderstanding your point.

beatlesgirl25 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:27c1e77d-3ad3-4fb8-9311-9077f5238e89">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : I get that. I know people are opposed to eating meat for various reasons (religious, nutritional, etc), but the majority of vegetarians and vegans I know are opposed for moral reasons. That's why the fake meat doesn't make sense to me. 
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

Just curious, what do your veggie/vegan friends say/think about the fake meat? I don't know that I've had this conversation too often with my vegetarian friends.

SarahPLiz · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:3162271a-ab7f-436a-8597-291ccc71f721">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : Just curious, what do your veggie/vegan friends say/think about the fake meat? I don't know that I've had this conversation too often with my vegetarian friends.
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]
I've never asked. I guess I should. Its just one of those random thoughts I had one day while in the grocery store that just sort of stuck with me as odd.

MandK9 · May 2011

I think SarahP means it in the same way that it was being discussed about rings earlier. Some people think it's hypocritical to wear a diamond-looking stone but to say that you don't support the diamond industry. Similarly, some people think it's hypocritical to eat beef-looking food but to say that you don't support the slaughter of cows.

Again, I'm guilty on both counts. I'm not trying to change anyone's behaviors with my choices though. The choices I make about moral issues are for myself only. So no, I'm not comfortable wearing a ring that may have caused another person major suffering, because I would be reminded of that far too often. And I don't want to eat real meat, because it makes me sad to think of the animals being killed. The texture of fake meat is different than real meat, plus I know that it didn't cause any animals any suffering. The taste is good. That's really all there is to my choice.

jenjenaz · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:663372a6-a562-4e78-897a-0196ce5a52ea">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : So do you feel the same way about lab created sapphires?
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]
yep, i actually do.

TheCranberry · May 2011

That's what I thought they were getting at, but I just don't agree. If you're against killing animals for food or clothes or whatever and no animals are killed as a result of your food choices or clothes choices, I don't see the problem. I actually think developing meat-less or faux ways of enjoying people's favorties might convince people to give it a try. If faux fur is as pretty as real fur, then there's no need to kill a chinchilla. If a veggie burger gives you the same flavor as ground beef, there's no need to kill a cow, right*?

I don't think people who are against these things for moral reasons are against coats that look like fur or burgers that taste like meat. They are against an actual animal being harmed. If no animal is harmed, I don't see why they shouldn't wear or eat those products.

*Note: I'm not saying faux fur or veggie burgers are as good as (however one might measure that) as a chinchilla stole or a hamburger. I know opinions vary wildly on these!

SarahPLiz · May 2011

Then we can agree to disagree. It doesn't affect my life one way or another. Its just one of those things that doesn't fit into my logic.

Blueyed228 · May 2011

The first time I ever heard about moissanite was when I was getting my nails done and the lady doing them said "pretty ring! Moissanite right?" when I told her no she went off on a tirade about how buying a real diamond was stupid since you can get a big fake one like hers for $800. And how no one will ever know since its not like people go around asking if diamond e-rings are real". That may be why im salty about it. But like I said, I don't care what you have. I just personally don't like them.

beatlesgirl25 · May 2011

I'm catching what you're throwing down, Cranberry, and I like it. Providing meat-free meat that doesn't taste bad is a great way to encourage others to try it too, by giving them what they want along with something you want. I was at a vegan restaurant with my vegetarian friend last year, and he went on and on about how impressed he was with the texture of the tofu "beef" in the "beef and broccoli," and tried to get the technique from someone in the kitchen. It really did feel and look like (pale) beef, and tasted pretty good! So I can see how a meat-eater could be impressed enough with a faux meat dish to give it a try instead of their usual. And that's a win-win, at least healthwise and also for creating a lesser demand for meat if that's one's agenda.

And well said, Mand.

SarahP, I'm curious now too and I think I'll ask my friends about it next time.

MandK9 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:e3a0d293-bcf3-415e-889a-c97937d6a9e4">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]The first time I ever heard about moissanite was when I was getting my nails done and the lady doing them said "pretty ring! Moissanite right?" when I told her no she went off on a tirade about how buying a real diamond was stupid since you can get a big fake one like hers for $800. And how no one will ever know since its not like people go around asking if diamond e-rings are real". That may be why im salty about it. But like I said, I don't care what you have. I just personally don't like them.
Posted by Blueyed228[/QUOTE]

That woman sounds like quite a peach. I tend to feel cranky about anything when someone lectures me about my choices. I hope you put her in her place.

There are people who wear moissanite to fool people into thinking it's a real diamond, and those who are upfront about it being something else. I'm in the latter group, and while those in the former group don't necessarily bother me personally, I can understand why it makes some people mad.

Wiscisbliss · May 2011

I guess that I understand people who get a moissanite and don't advertise that it is a diamond.

I was teased and excluded in grade school because my family was "too poor" No matter what I wore, I never looked quite like the other kids. Nothing had the nike swoosh on it or a name brand logo, my gym clothes didn't have three stripes down the side, stupid crap like that. I did get a pair of Doc Martins style sandals at Target and my mom helped me color the stitches with a yellow Sharpiemarker. I didn't correct anyone who made assumptions.

As an adult, I understand that that was sort of lame, and your should be confident in yourself, blah, blah, blah, but not feeling "good enough" during many years of childhood can really stick with you.

Blue's attitude reminds me of it a little. "It's OK for you to have/wear, but I personally think xxx is lame." Those words can really hurt someone's feelings who really cannot afford a diamond but would like one.

It does seem like the perspective of a "have" and not a "have not" I don't know you personally, that it just what it seems like to me.

Blueyed228 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:596b3f55-df89-4c51-9a1a-06f25bbe89a9">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]I guess that I understand people who get a moissanite and don't advertise that it is a diamond. I was teased and excluded in grade school because my family was "too poor" No matter what I wore, I never looked quite like the other kids. Nothing had the nike swoosh on it or a name brand logo, my gym clothes didn't have three stripes down the side, stupid crap like that. I did get a pair of Doc Martins style sandals at Target and my mom helped me color the stitches with a yellow Sharpiemarker. I didn't correct anyone who made assumptions. As an adult, I understand that that was sort of lame, and your should be confident in yourself, blah, blah, blah, but not feeling "good enough" during many years of childhood can really stick with you. Blue's attitude reminds me of it a little. "It's OK for you to have/wear, but I personally think xxx is lame." Those words can really hurt someone's feelings who really cannot afford a diamond but would like one. It does seem like the perspective of a "have" and not a "have not" I don't know you personally, that it just what it seems like to me.
Posted by Wiscisbliss[/QUOTE]

Thats not what I said. I said I dont like them. I also dont like the color green. It doesnt meant that I think that since my walls are painted blue that you are a horrible loser for having green ones. I dont see the difference.

jenjenaz · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:596b3f55-df89-4c51-9a1a-06f25bbe89a9">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]As an adult, I understand that that was sort of lame, and your should be confident in yourself, blah, blah, blah, but not feeling "good enough" during many years of childhood can really stick with you.
Posted by Wiscisbliss[/QUOTE]

i see where you're coming from and had similar experiences as a child. we weren't poor, but that it wasn't something my parents were going to spend money on. kmart was fine. and i can see the value in that as an adult (but boy did it suck as a kid!)

i guess where i worry, especially after the financial meltdown, is in people trying to 'keep up with joneses ' - and that's what a 'fake' diamond ring feels like to me. i understand the moral conflicts around diamond mining, so perhaps i need to be a little less judgemental - i'll admit that i'm not perfect. :) get what you can afford and be proud of it.

jaycee7389 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:b9f13af3-aed0-43de-bdc3-5f09b7ff6e12">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : Most vegetarians I know became this way in late adolescence/early adulthood, once they became informed on the subject and better able to make choices for themselves and their lifestyles. But they grew up on hot dogs and Thanksgiving turkey and Christmas ham, and have sentimental and traditional ties to this type of food. I don't judge people for wanting some semblance of what they've known all their lives and what foods make them happy to see. If you grow up loving something and then learn more about it and realize it comes from a "bad place," I think it makes sense to use alternatives like tofurkey at Thanksgiving so you can have the best of both worlds. Not everything has to be a moral statement of one's beliefs. Sometimes you just want some fake turkey. ETA: Actually, this whole argument also applies to the diamond debate. Please consider it as such.
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

this basically sums up how I feel about the whole thing. I grew up wanting a diamond ring when I got engaged/married, and never knew anything different. But when I became older and learned about blood diamonds, not to mention how ridiculously expensive they are, I stopped wanting one. Then I learned about moissanite (which is a stone, not a fake diamond) and have been considering it. I like the look of them, not to mention they apparently have more fire and brilliance than a diamond anyhow. I don't have anything against people who have diamonds, it just personally isn't for me.

BecW2be · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:e3a0d293-bcf3-415e-889a-c97937d6a9e4">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]The first time I ever heard about moissanite was when I was getting my nails done and the lady doing them said "pretty ring! Moissanite right?" Posted by Blueyed228[/QUOTE]

Ok, the fact that someone asked if your ring was fake while you were getting fake nails just made me giggle. :)

Blueyed228 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:2bb8816a-9fcd-4236-a782-ec946107606a">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : Ok, the fact that someone asked if your ring was fake while you were getting fake nails just made me giggle. :)
Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE]

Ha!

artbyallie · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:1de4e2ed-5c1c-4403-8edb-b37bed279fa1">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : yep, i actually do.
Posted by jenjenaz[/QUOTE]

<div>I freely admit my ring has a lab sapphire. And it is a real sapphire. It may be man-made, but it's structurally and chemically identical to a mined stone. It's not like it's cut glass being passed off as a gemstone or something.</div>

peccavi1604 · February 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_moissanite-ring-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:444563e0-87db-4857-adbb-f42a230a344aPost:0f6e8869-593c-4015-9f28-fd9542082fd0">Re: moissanite ring question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: moissanite ring question : I read her point to be this: If you are actually opposed to the diamond trade (and not the price of a diamond), why would you get a stone that is easily mistaken for a diamond? If you are that opposed, pick another stone that shows that you aren't a slave to the world's current diamond obsession. But that's just what I got out of it. To me, its the same logic I apply when I say people are crazy for saying that they don't support the leather trade, but they buy synthetic leather shoes that look like leather...or they don't support he fur trade so they wear fake fur. If you want to make a statement, make a statement. However, if you want the look of a diamond and the cost it what is prohibiting it, then by all means pick a lab created one. I don't care. But don't say you picked it because you are opposed to the diamond trade. That seems a little hypocritical to me.
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

This doesn't make sense to me. I like a clear white gemstone against a yellow gold setting, but I don't like an artificially inflated price created by a clever marketing scheme. Moissanite is a colorless, very hard, very durable gemstone with twice the fire and much more brilliance than a diamond. I'm not getting it because I like the look of diamond. I'm getting it because I like the look of moissanite. There's nothing dishonest or hypocritical about that.

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