Wedding Etiquette Forum

FFF/LFF

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Re: FFF/LFF

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:b459c333-3ab9-492d-bffc-52c4604c57b3">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF : I HAD TO SAY SOMETHING. I just am tired of her, and as a proud person from upstate NY, she can eff off with her LI talk. You had me damn near rolling laughing at that. TY.
    Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]

    Link please?
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:a1956d5b-2390-4dae-8258-994610774dd5">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF : Link please?
    Posted by steign[/QUOTE]

    <div><a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_engagement-party-offered-by-venue-but-were-not-supposed-to-throw-our-own">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_engagement-party-offered-by-venue-but-were-not-supposed-to-throw-our-own</a></div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:dfe0501a-3730-4a0a-ae00-eab681a4dfba">Re: FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]I totally don't understand the idea of not liking other people opening presents because YOU don't have presents. I'm seriously considering not opening gifts in front of guests at my shower because I don't have a poker face, and that's a LOT of pressure to be equally surprised/elated/stoked for every present. It just sounds like a lot of anxiety on my end. I'd rather thank everyone for the gifts and open them later with my FI, and then send thank you cards after.
    Posted by CourtaniaLynn[/QUOTE]

    I disagree. I would be so mad if I spent all of that time and money to get a shower gift, and the person didn't open it at the shower.
  • kmbryant2413kmbryant2413 member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:ec4e7e40-1b03-4cf4-abe8-7ff4cd029878">Re: FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF/LFF : I disagree. I would be so mad if I spent all of that time and money to get a shower gift, and the person didn't open it at the shower.
    Posted by ladytori[/QUOTE]

    <div>Would you really be 'so' mad? I'm not trying to fight, but I mean they're still receiving the gift, they will send you a card with their appreciation, and they will use it. So what's the issue?</div><div>
    </div><div>ETA: I never had one, and have never attended one, so I guess that is the 'point'. My bad. But getting angry about it, I dunno. *shrug*</div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:ec4e7e40-1b03-4cf4-abe8-7ff4cd029878">Re: FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF/LFF : I disagree. I would be so mad if I spent all of that time and money to get a shower gift, and the person didn't open it at the shower.
    Posted by ladytori[/QUOTE]

    I agree with this.

    I could be wrong but, I thought a bridal shower was to shower you with gifts? What's the point of having a part if you don't open your gifts and thank your guests.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:e9d0020b-7361-4916-94e2-a8a649c607a4">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF : <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_engagement-party-offered-by-venue-but-were-not-supposed-to-throw-our-own">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_engagement-party-offered-by-venue-but-were-not-supposed-to-throw-our-own</a>
    Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]

    Thanks, not sure how I missed it. I think I was looking for a 50+ post with her starting drama in it lol.
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  • In Response to Re:FFF/LFF:[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF/LFF:In Response to Re: FFF/LFF : I disagree. I would be so mad if I spent all of that time and money to get a shower gift, and the person didn't open it at the shower.Posted by ladytoriWould you really be 'so' mad? I'm not trying to fight, but I mean they're still receiving the gift, they will send you a card with their appreciation, and they will use it. So what's the issue? Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]

    I would be upset. Most of the reason I go to a shower is so I can see her open my present. It's exciting for me as the giver. And if they don't open them at the shower, it really looks like, 'thanks for the gift. But I can't be bothered to open it.'
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:fd9b77f3-86c4-44e2-acf5-ebc7c983c366">Re: FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF/LFF : I almost have to flame the OP on this one because the "only reason" mpierce came to play was because OP sent her the link? After they ended their friendship, and she stepped out of the wedding she really sent the bride a link? "look what everyone is saying about you". I think ataloss, mpierce and terminator were all the same people. IMO
    Posted by Jessalyn2013[/QUOTE]


    This. And I flame anyone who disagrees! That whole thing was just way too suspicious to me.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • I feel the same about people who don't want to open their cards at the shower. My sister wants a card box at her baby shower so she can take them home and open with her DH. I just ignored her Lol.
    You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back. - Barbara DeAngelis
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:2a0adc6b-6677-4537-885f-21d0f367fab7">Re: FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF/LFF : Would you really be 'so' mad? I'm not trying to fight, but I mean they're still receiving the gift, they will send you a card with their appreciation, and they will use it. So what's the issue? ETA: I never had one, and have never attended one, so I guess that is the 'point'. My bad. But getting angry about it, I dunno. *shrug*
    Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]

    Since it's your first shower, please open up the gifts in front of your guest. They spent so much of their time and money to find you these gifts.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:5e830263-940e-4d09-a4f0-680246f84dd6">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF: I would be upset. Most of the reason I go to a shower is so I can see her open my present. It's exciting for me as the giver. And if they don't open them at the shower, it really looks like, 'thanks for the gift. But I can't be bothered to open it.'
    Posted by misshart00[/QUOTE]

    <div>Alright. That I get. I just haven't been to one (besides one baby shower). I will uninformed. TY! :)</div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:5a1e4dec-968a-4c01-80ea-173e3351de93">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF : Alright. That I get. I just haven't been to one (besides one baby shower). I will uninformed. TY! :)
    Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]

    Then, I sent my LFF out to kymbryant who took excellent advice from knotties! Have a great time at your shower. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:029f356a-cfab-4457-b147-45c396ca068d">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF : Then, I sent my LFF out to kymbryant who took excellent advice from knotties! Have a great time at your shower.
    Posted by ladytori[/QUOTE]

    <div>...I'm not having a shower. I was just curious in response to what someone posted about being upset. I was just asking why, because in my first marriage I did not have a shower and hadn't attended any previously.</div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
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  • I'm a little late on this one but..
     

    Oh no she didn't just diss upstate New York! ::head weave::

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    J + A [4-15-13] + JJ [1-22-14] 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:5e830263-940e-4d09-a4f0-680246f84dd6">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF: I would be upset. Most of the reason I go to a shower is so I can see her open my present. It's exciting for me as the giver. And if they don't open them at the shower, it really looks like, 'thanks for the gift. But I can't be bothered to open it.'
    Posted by misshart00[/QUOTE]

    Would you be upset even if you had to sit through 2 hours of gift opening on top of the time already spent at the shower playing games, etc?  Do you think there is a point when a shower is too big that opening the gifts in person would take too long and make ppl bored, annoyed, etc?

    I'm not being argumentative, I can see and respect both sides of this discussion.  I'm just curious, having been to a huge shower once where it took the bride 1.5+ to open gifts. . . I say 1,5+ because she was still openoing gifts when my mom and I had to duck out.

    Sorry if this is thread jacking!

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • I flame every OP that posts a question, and doesn't come back with more info, or if the advice was good. 
  • For the showers- I flame people that have HUGE showers knowing that it'll take hours to open gifts and so they can get so many gifts. If you can't suck it up to get hundreds of dollars worth of gifts to open them in public, don't have a freaking shower.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:b908636c-e5d7-4b29-b2ae-0ce7c17d5f36">Re: FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]For the showers- I flame people that have HUGE showers knowing that it'll take hours to open gifts and so they can get so many gifts. If you can't suck it up to get hundreds of dollars worth of gifts to open them in public, don't have a freaking shower.
    Posted by misssunshine17[/QUOTE]

    Agreed!
  • In Response to Re:FFF/LFF:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF:In Response to Re:FFF/LFF: I would be upset. Most of the reason I go to a shower is so I can see her open my present. It's exciting for me as the giver. And if they don't open them at the shower, it really looks like, 'thanks for the gift. But I can't be bothered to open it.'Posted by misshart00Would you be upset even if you had to sit through 2 hours of gift opening on top of the time already spent at the shower playing games, etc?nbsp; Do you think there is a point when a shower is too big that opening the gifts in person would take too long and make ppl bored, annoyed, etc?I'm not being argumentative, I can see and respect both sides of this discussion.nbsp; I'm just curious, having been to a huge shower once where it took the bride 1.5 to open gifts. . . I say 1,5 because she was still openoing gifts when my mom and I had to duck out.Sorry if this is thread jacking! Posted by cmsciulli[/QUOTE]

    I personally find showers that large to be distasteful. But that may be regional. Where I'm from, everyone has a shower at someone's home with snacks and cake. It's never these grand affairs where people rent a hall. To me, a shower should be the brides closest friends so, in theory, it shouldn't take that long to open gifts. I'm not knocking huge expensive showers, but if you don't even have time to open the gifts, maybe you should have had multiple showers or even a non gift event like a luncheon.
  • In Response to Re:FFF/LFF:[QUOTE]For the showers I flame people that have HUGE showers knowing that it'll take hours to open gifts and so they can get so many gifts. If you can't suck it up to get hundreds of dollars worth of gifts to open them in public, don't have a freaking shower.
    Posted by misssunshine17[/QUOTE]

    I definitely posted my reply at the same time. This expresses my sentiment better.
  • kmbryant2413kmbryant2413 member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:629e95f6-513e-4879-b203-2765dc410fa1">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF: I personally find showers that large to be distasteful. But that may be regional. Where I'm from, everyone has a shower at someone's home with snacks and cake. It's never these grand affairs where people rent a hall. To me, a shower should be the brides closest friends so, in theory, it shouldn't take that long to open gifts. I'm not knocking huge expensive showers, but if you don't even have time to open the gifts, maybe you should have had multiple showers or even a non gift event like a luncheon.
    Posted by misshart00[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>To bash family a little bit, my cousin (who works very hard, had a the time a lazy husband, whole other story) got surprise pregnant (yes, her fault) and just *didn't* have the money to get everything she needed. She threw a huge shower purposefully to get a lot of the stuff she needed. I side-eyed that one pretty hard.</div><div>
    </div><div>That being said, she's done with nursing school, her husband has a good job now, and they support their children very well. So only sort of bashing ;) 

    </div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:629e95f6-513e-4879-b203-2765dc410fa1">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF: I personally find showers that large to be distasteful. <strong>But that may be regional</strong>. Where I'm from, everyone has a shower at someone's home with snacks and cake. It's never these grand affairs where people rent a hall. To me, a shower should be the brides closest friends so, in theory, it shouldn't take that long to open gifts. I'm not knocking huge expensive showers, but if you don't even have time to open the gifts, maybe you should have had multiple showers or even a non gift event like a luncheon.
    Posted by misshart00[/QUOTE]

    You mean a LI thing? :-P

    I always thought multiple showers were kind of AWish, but from what you said I understand why a bride might have multiple showers better now. 

    I have never been to a shower in a person's home, they have always been at a restaurant, a hall, park, etc. and have had 20+ guests.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • I don't like to interrupt, but I'd like to request that you please just focus flames (unless they're LFFs) on ideas not people.  Thanks.
  • In Response to Re:FFF/LFF:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF:In Response to Re:FFF/LFF: I personally find showers that large to be distasteful. But that may be regional. Where I'm from, everyone has a shower at someone's home with snacks and cake. It's never these grand affairs where people rent a hall. To me, a shower should be the brides closest friends so, in theory, it shouldn't take that long to open gifts. I'm not knocking huge expensive showers, but if you don't even have time to open the gifts, maybe you should have had multiple showers or even a non gift event like a luncheon.Posted by misshart00You mean a LI thing? :PI always thought multiple showers were kind of AWish, but from what you said I understand why a bride might have multiple showers better now.nbsp; I have never been to a shower in a person's home, they have always been at a restaurant, a hall, park, etc. and have had 20 guests. Posted by cmsciulli[/QUOTE]

    I knew I was gonna get busted for the regional thing!

    I have no problem with multiple showers as long as they have different guest lists and are hosted by different people. And as long as the bride doesn't ask for them.

    Side note that I'm still bitter about: I hosted a shower for a friend, not super close, but a friend. I found out at the shower that I wasn't invited to the 150 person wedding. And the bride couldn't believe her friends were RSVPing with their FIs. It took everything in me not to just break down in tears. I worked hard on that stupid shower and she got a ton of presents. She had four showers. None of the attendees were invited to the wedding.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:233a080c-8e76-4aac-973f-0c42f7aaec41">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF: I knew I was gonna get busted for the regional thing! I have no problem with multiple showers as long as they have different guest lists and are hosted by different people. And as long as the bride doesn't ask for them. Side note that I'm still bitter about: I hosted a shower for a friend, not super close, but a friend. I found out at the shower that I wasn't invited to the 150 person wedding. And the bride couldn't believe her friends were RSVPing with their FIs. It took everything in me not to just break down in tears. I worked hard on that stupid shower and she got a ton of presents. She had four showers. None of the attendees were invited to the wedding.
    Posted by misshart00[/QUOTE]

    Ouch.

    None of the shower attendees were invited to the wedding?  Just from the shower you kindly hosted or from some of the other 3 showers too?

    I'm sorry. . . are you both still friends?

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • In Response to Re:FFF/LFF:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF/LFF:In Response to Re:FFF/LFF: I knew I was gonna get busted for the regional thing! I have no problem with multiple showers as long as they have different guest lists and are hosted by different people. And as long as the bride doesn't ask for them. Side note that I'm still bitter about: I hosted a shower for a friend, not super close, but a friend. I found out at the shower that I wasn't invited to the 150 person wedding. And the bride couldn't believe her friends were RSVPing with their FIs. It took everything in me not to just break down in tears. I worked hard on that stupid shower and she got a ton of presents. She had four showers. None of the attendees were invited to the wedding.Posted by misshart00Ouch.None of the shower attendees were invited to the wedding?nbsp; Just from the shower you kindly hosted or from some of the other 3 showers too?I'm sorry. . . are you both still friends? Posted by cmsciulli[/QUOTE]

    I think some from all three showers weren't invited to the wedding. We're still friends... On Facebook. I don't really talk to her. I just remember her being so baffled as to why people were RSVPing for their fiances. And why her guest list was out of control. And why people were asking if it was a private wedding.
  • edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:f550d43d-41bc-47c8-b260-fe1f0653e3b5">Re: FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm flaming OwningAHome for starting the 'be nice to each other' thread when she's the one who posts on the E board all this rude stuff about not personally greeting guests and how showers are rude, but she's still having one. LFF to Lia for my inspiration for my BMs and for being all around spot on with advice.
    Posted by misssunshine17[/QUOTE]

    WHAT HAVE I SAID TO YOU THAT WAS RUDE PERSONALLY REGARDING YOU? MAYBE YOU THINK MY IDEAS ARE RUDE, FINE, BUT I HAVE NEVER SAID ANYTHING RUDE ABOUT YOU.

    AT LEAST IF YOU CAME TO WEDDING I WOULD BE NICE TO YOU. YOU SEEM LIKE A REALLY INSECURE PERSON.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:e3040926-02c5-4d5c-a814-402f651c13d2">Re: FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF/LFF : WHAT HAVE I SAID TO YOU THAT WAS RUDE PERSONALLY REGARDING YOU? MAYBE YOU THINK MY IDEAS ARE RUDE, FINE, BUT I HAVE NEVER SAID ANYTHING RUDE ABOUT YOU. AT LEAST IF YOU CAME TO WEDDING I WOULD BE NICE TO YOU. YOU SEEM LIKE A REALLY INSECURE PERSON.
    Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

    <div><img style="-webkit-user-select:none;" src="http://rlv.zcache.com/capslock_cruise_control_for_cool_card-p137652809910574341en8ks_210.jpg" alt="" /></div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:5c1ccd13-f009-4c73-a2e6-8ea4d59c930e">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]If OAH is so offended by prayer, why would she have prayer at her ceremony? You can have a completely prayer free ceremony that is still very lovely.
    Posted by StephJean83[/QUOTE]

    I'm not having any prayer. Our ceremony and reception are 100% non-religious.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ffflff-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c65678b6-ef12-4474-8f3a-7c58236869abPost:3f3f22d1-3b44-41b8-b330-8f07d4c6404a">Re:FFF/LFF</a>:
    [QUOTE]And another flame to OwningAHome for saying that a bridesmaid who hosts a shower doesn't get a hostess gift because that's "covered" by the bridesmaid gift. <a href="http://m.theknot.com/forums/weddingboards_etiquette_hostessgifts9">http://m.theknot.com/forums/weddingboards_etiquette_hostessgifts9</a>
    Posted by TXKristan[/QUOTE]

    I didn't say it was. It ASKED if it was. Difference.
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