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Changing my name

ash273ukash273uk member
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in Wedding Recap and Withdrawal
After a month of being married, I am changing my name today!  While I am super excited about this, for some reason it's a little bittersweet for me to be losing my maiden name. I am going to keep my maiden name as my middle name, but it's still a little sad to lose the name I've had for 30 years!  I know that I don't HAVE to change my name, but I want to.  These feelings are not enough to make me change my mind and not change my name, but it's just a little bittersweet. 
Did/Does anyone else feel this way?
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Re: Changing my name

  • Summer2011BrideSummer2011Bride member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    My maiden name is SO common that I was actually excited to get a new last name that was more unique. It was weird at first to sign everything with my new name and to get called it at work (I'm a teacher), but after a month or so, it just became habit. Now I feel weird if I get referred to by my maiden name!

    I think keeping your maiden as your middle name is a good compromise if you want to change your name but will miss your old one.


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  • mattycammattycam member
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    My married name is harder to pronounce and longer than my maiden name but I'm okay with it. Many people still know me by my maiden name so it's not completely gone.
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  • Turtle&StarTurtle&Star
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    I was surprised at how hard it was for me to change my name once it came time to do it - bittersweet, as you said. I had known for a long time that I would take H's name, and felt fine with it - excited, in fact - and then when the day came to actually go down to Social Security, I freaked out. I had to take another couple of days before I felt ready to do it. And even now (it's been a little over a month), I have some mixed feelings. It IS weird to lose that name that's been yours your whole life. And it also feels strange - stranger than I thought it would - that I'm making this huge change and H is not.

    Having said that, though, I'm also still, fundamentally, glad that I made the change. I love having the same name as H. So...yeah. I feel you, and I think it's ok to feel a bit funny about the whole thing, without feeling that you need to change your mind.
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  • Cackle6Cackle6 member
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    I'm probably one of the lone voices of dissent. H kinda talked me into adding his last name to mine, so now I'm Cackle Middle Maiden Married. H's last name is super common, and hearing my first name with his last name just makes me cringe a little. It's a lot like Jenny Johnson, in that my first name and his last name start with the same letter, so it's very sing songy. Also, like my mom pointed out, when they picked my name, they picked a more "plain" name because my maiden name is very unique - so pairing my first name with a  "plain" last name, well, it just sounds funny to me, heh.

    So long story short, I added his last name so that if we have kids someday, I'll legally have the same last name. I'm still going by my maiden name professionally and socially though. And it's been 2 months and I still haven't offically changed anything, heh. I figure as long as I get it done by the time we file our taxes I should be fine, lol. :)

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  • cwaggoner07cwaggoner07 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-recap-withdrawal_changing-my-name?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:12Discussion:71f3153a-d94b-44ff-b34a-0761094e9e90Post:b6fcf1dd-39f0-485e-ab5f-5b30124359df">Re: Changing my name</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm probably one of the lone voices of dissent. H kinda talked me into adding his last name to mine, so now I'm Cackle Middle Maiden Married. H's last name is super common, and hearing my first name with his last name just makes me cringe a little. It's a lot like Jenny Johnson, in that my first name and his last name start with the same letter, so it's very sing songy. Also, like my mom pointed out, when they picked my name, they picked a more "plain" name because my maiden name is very unique - so pairing my first name with a  "plain" last name, well, it just sounds funny to me, heh. So long story short, I added his last name so that if we have kids someday, I'll legally have the same last name. I'm still going by my maiden name professionally and socially though. And it's been 2 months and I still haven't offically changed anything, heh. I figure as long as I get it done by the time we file our taxes I should be fine, lol. :)
    Posted by Cackle6[/QUOTE]

    Just my .02 as a CPA, it doesn't matter at all what your name is, as long as you are legally married.
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  • Cackle6Cackle6 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-recap-withdrawal_changing-my-name?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:12Discussion:71f3153a-d94b-44ff-b34a-0761094e9e90Post:8051495d-a287-4c03-adea-d237571ddd6a">Re: Changing my name</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Changing my name : Just my .02 as a CPA, it doesn't matter at all what your name is, as long as you are legally married.
    Posted by cwaggoner07[/QUOTE]

    <div>Well that's good to know! I guess for some reason I assumed I'd have to have changed my name in order to file together, good to know that's not the case, thanks! :)</div>

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  • arrestclementinearrestclementine member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-recap-withdrawal_changing-my-name?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:12Discussion:71f3153a-d94b-44ff-b34a-0761094e9e90Post:b6fcf1dd-39f0-485e-ab5f-5b30124359df">Re: Changing my name</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm probably one of the lone voices of dissent. H kinda talked me into adding his last name to mine, so now I'm Cackle Middle Maiden Married. H's last name is super common, and hearing my first name with his last name just makes me cringe a little. It's a lot like Jenny Johnson, in that my first name and his last name start with the same letter, so it's very sing songy. Also, like my mom pointed out, when they picked my name, they picked a more "plain" name because my maiden name is very unique - so pairing my first name with a  "plain" last name, well, it just sounds funny to me, heh. So long story short, I added his last name so that if we have kids someday, I'll legally have the same last name. I'm still going by my maiden name professionally and socially though. And it's been 2 months and I still haven't offically changed anything, heh. I figure as long as I get it done by the time we file our taxes I should be fine, lol. :)
    Posted by Cackle6[/QUOTE]

    I did this too.  I use my maiden name for work, and H's last name for everything else but legally I'm Amber Middle <Maiden H's Name /> for my last name.  So far it seems to be working out well. 
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  • annmarie714annmarie714 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    I was so thrilled to change mine!  I love my maiden, VERY unique, 12 letter long last name but am SO happy to have a common (but not "Smith" kind of common) last name that people can SPELLLLLL! and SAY!
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  • Jana711Jana711
    First Comment First Anniversary
    Nope, I was excited to change my name and to take my husband's name.
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  • KamirareneeKamirarenee
    First Comment
    I felt that way for a second but happy to change my name. Marks a new chapter. Plus I like my last name short and sweet.
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  • natsfans84natsfans84 member
    First Comment
    We just got married 8/4 and people keep calling me Mrs HisLast even though I haven't changed my name and am not sure I want to. I LOVE my name, it's unique and means a lot to me.. DH's last name is very common and I don't love the idea of having a "plain" name after 24 years of being one of very few people with my last name. Everyone's pressuring me to change it, but idk.. we'll see lol. Eventually we have to decide one way or the other!
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  • amg8amg8
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    I'm going to Social Security tomorrow to begin the name change procedure. I am feeling sad about it too--I do love my last name, plus I'm a teacher, so I feel that my last name is such a huge part of my professional identity and I'm accustomed to hearing it all day.  I am also a traditionalist though, and I have always intended to take the plunge and take his name, especially because we plan to have children and it just seems easier. I am sure once I have time to adjust to the change (I am not good with change!) it will be fine though.  
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  • FlorenceMichelle123FlorenceMichelle123 member
    First Comment

    My boyfriend and I are getting married on June 1st, 2013.  We've been engaged since August 1st.  We've talked about everything for the wedding, and we've decided for me to take his last name.  But I am sad, because I love my last name... What can I do? 

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