My fiance just received an invite to his cousin's stepson's wedding that is in a couple of months from now. The stepson's mother (fiance's cousin) knows that we are engaged, and SHE is the one in charge of sending at least some of the invites to her stepson's wedding, as their return address is on our invitation. I got a little offended when I noted that only my fiance's name is on the invite envelope, dictating that only HE is invited to this wedding. I kind of think it's odd he was invited at all, since he doesn't know them, but he was and here we are.
We have been engaged since April and I know for a fact that his cousin is aware of it. My fiancé, of course, wants to go to the wedding, even though he doesn't even KNOW the stepson or the bride at all. He, his sister and his mother all told us when we explained situation to them that it is IMPLIED that I am invited and I should just go with him. ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME?? Who DOES that?? I would be mortified to just crash someone's wedding, first of all, and secondly, does this mean this is how his entire family is going to treat OUR wedding invites and just show up uninvited??!! Holy crap!
So, since my fiance (and his family) is hell-bent on us all going to this wedding (I would have rather just RSVP'd 'no' and moved on but that isn't an option apparently), I wrote a simple and politely-worded note and stuck it to the reply card, saying that we were confused and wanted to ask if the invite is intended for both of us or just him and that we totally understand that they may have restrictions on how many guests they are able to accommodate and just to let us know with a phone call. I really don't want to go to this wedding, but pressure from his mother indicates we have to try to go. I feel really bad about having to ask, but I refuse to just be rude and show up uninvited or just add a "2" to a reply card that was only for him --I would not want people just randomly adding guests to my reply cards, so I wouldn't want to do that to someone else. I thought including the note would be OK since they could take time to think it over and get back to us instead of putting them on the spot with a phone call or just assuming.
What's worse is that we are not inviting them to our wedding as our guest list is already done and the venue is booked and (the obvious) we don't even know them --I didn't even know of the couple until we got the invitation and I asked my fiance who they are. He agreed with me at least that they are not getting added to the guest list, thank goodness. This is already so darn awkward. Any advice or tips on how to handle this? Am I freaking out over nothing? I am now really worried about the RSVP's we are going to get from his side of the family, based on what has happened with this already. I guess I have to tell his mother that under no circumstances should she advise ANYONE to just "show up" to our wedding if the invited didn't have their name on it. I mean really.
Any advice on how to handle this is welcomed. Especially for how to handle actually having to go to this wedding and being totally embarrassed when I get there. Ugh. Thanks!
-Worried Bride To Be