Stock The Bar Party

AllieBear725 · July 2013

OP was asking advice about the wedding she's in. She asked how to word a stock the bar party for said bride, and we all went on a semi-rant about how those aren't okay especially if it's stocking the bar for the reception.

Then OP said she's not sure if it's for said bride's new house or wedding reception, and we all just kept talking about how they are two different things, but it's never polite to ask for gifts (apparently some people find this the norm in their circles though), even if it's a housewarming. It's pretty much implied.

cwaggoner07 · July 2013

Keith+Brenna said:

My friend had a stock the bar party for their wedding. I did not attend. They had so many different types of alcohol, that no one drank the same thing more than once. To have to switch wines every glass was horrible.

Oh I didn't even THINK about that! Gross.

Like I said, I've only heard about them for housewarming-type events, OR for wedding showers where the couple hadn't lived together previously.

misscecelia8 · July 2013

PLEASE do not do this! I'm the MOH in my friends wedding and she begged for a STB Party. It caused huge tension between guest and even the wedding party and family. Unfortunately it makes the bride and groom look somewhat greedy and since you're the one helping to plan...you'll look just as bad for going along w/ the idea. Although it's a very up-to-date thing to do now, older generations (grandparents, Aunts/Uncles) do NOT understand this concept. It's better not to. Just my advice.

gpeeples · July 2013

I wouldn't call it a "Stock the Bar" party. Just call it a housewarming party. Every housewarming party I've ever been to has involved most guests bringing a bottle of something. "House warming" doesn't sound rude or gift-grabby, and your friend will still get to stock up her bar.

gpeeples · July 2013

fyrefly76 said:

I actually threw myself a "Help me Empty the Bar" party. When I moved into my own place, dad "helped" by giving me all the bottles of his crap liquor; Apple Pucker, Cinnamon stuff, blue stuff, etc. After moving and taking bottles of this crap to new apartments several times, I decided it was time to get rid of it all. Instead of a BYOB, I had them bring their favorite mixer, so cranberry juice, tonic, diet soda, etc. We got crazy boozy, created a drink called Nerds (that tasted like the candy consisting of cranberry juice, blue pucker, 7up, and some crappy watermelon kiwi stuff I had), and had a generally good time.

Can we be friends?

MandyMost · July 2013

It is so incredibly rude and tacky to host a party for yourself and ask for gifts of any kind. If you are have recently moved and are having a housewarming party, you do not ask for gifts, but guests generally know to bring something. Same as if you have a birthday party, you don't ask for gifts, but people usually bring a card or present.

If you someone is throwing you a shower of some sort, and you want to make it cheaper/easier on your guests, I think it's fine to have a theme shower. I went to a baby shower that was a "book shower", where everyone was asked to bring their favorite childhood book for the couple--essentially they had all the baby stuff they needed, and/or plenty of money to buy it themselves, so this was a nice way of having a shower that wasn't a massive gift grab. I could see a "stock the bar" shower being similar.

snoopycac · July 2013

My myfriend had a 'grocery' party after her wedding. I didnt go because i could afford groceries for myself, let alone her. But i found it strange. Has anyone else heard of a grocery party?

Weezy56 · July 2013

My moms friend offered to throw us a couple's shower. She asked if we would like a "Stock the Bar" theme, we said sure. It was not for the reception, and we did not consume any of the gifts until after we were married just like with a traditional shower. I personally don't see anything wrong with it as long as it's not self hosted and isn't for reception alcohol.

[Deleted User] · July 2013

snoopycac said:

My myfriend had a 'grocery' party after her wedding. I didnt go because i could afford groceries for myself, let alone her. But i found it strange. Has anyone else heard of a grocery party?

What in the holy hell is that. That is one of the rudest themes for a party that I have ever heard. I hate your friend.

kipnus · July 2013

snoopycac said:

My myfriend had a 'grocery' party after her wedding. I didnt go because i could afford groceries for myself, let alone her. But i found it strange. Has anyone else heard of a grocery party?

That is so weird! I would never let anyone buy groceries for me unless I was incapacitated, and I had given them money and a detailed list. Groceries involve lots of personal preferences! And this was AFTER the wedding, where she presumably had already gotten gifts?

gpeeples · July 2013

fyrefly76 said:

gpeeples said:

fyrefly76 said:

I actually threw myself a "Help me Empty the Bar" party. When I moved into my own place, dad "helped" by giving me all the bottles of his crap liquor; Apple Pucker, Cinnamon stuff, blue stuff, etc. After moving and taking bottles of this crap to new apartments several times, I decided it was time to get rid of it all. Instead of a BYOB, I had them bring their favorite mixer, so cranberry juice, tonic, diet soda, etc. We got crazy boozy, created a drink called Nerds (that tasted like the candy consisting of cranberry juice, blue pucker, 7up, and some crappy watermelon kiwi stuff I had), and had a generally good time.

Can we be friends?

Sure! I live in Chicago, come on over. I still have a bottle of "Hot Damn! Cinnamon Schnapps" in the back of the bar that I keep threatening to regift to random friends. Come over with a bottle of apple juice and we'll invent a new cocktail.

I live in PA, not very close to Chicago.

PrimRoseMama · July 2013

holy crap. Its not up to anyone to help stock the bar for her wedding. How tacky is this? VOM.

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