Since this is the first post I've ever made on TK, I'm sure some people will tell me I'm super mean and whatever, but my honest first thought when I read this was......why waste the postage? Just hang a sign outside the venue that says "first 125 people welcome".
Honestly though, we all had to cut our guest lists. First to go for me were kids. Like some PP's, I have a huge family. I'm the third youngest of 25 grand kids on my mom's side. I'm inviting my first cousins and their spouses, but not the adult children of my first cousins (AKA my second cousins). It was a hard decision because I obviously love them, but good grief.......inviting the second cousins is another 40 people not including their spouses or SO's.
We are attempting to cut down my guest list to 125. At the moment I have 230 people on my guest list. Would it be bad form to send out a letter to all 230 people stating that I would love to have them come however we are limited in space so the first people to respond will be invited. Please note this was my fiancé's idea. Any suggestions would help.
What????? My suggestion is that you do something other than this.
My first reaction was the first 50 to respond should get a bonus set of steak knives.
Make your list starting with immediate family (parents, siblings + SOs) then branch out to aunts and uncles, the cousins. Do a separate list of your friends. Only put people that you're close to or that you see on a regular basis. Add the lists together and see what you have. If you still need to cut you can start with either friends or family, up to you. Cousins may get cut, or maybe you decide to only invite aunts/uncles/cousins that you see regularly. If you haven't seen aunt Mildred in 15 years you might decide to cut her.
It can be done. People may be hurt, but most will understand that weddings are expensive and not everyone can be invited.
I know most on here don't like it- but I am doing it anyway. The only people who get a date are those who are married or engaged. Also its easier to cut out whole groups of people (ie dates, coworkers, bible club members) than risk hurting feelings by only inviting a few Also cut out children- will some couples not be able to come because they can't find sitters? Sure, but it's not my problem to worry about their children. Establish rules and stick to them. Also maybe let it be known before hand that you are planning a very small event. Just remember its your wedding and you don't owe anyone an invite.
I know most on here don't like it- but I am doing it anyway. The only people who get a date are those who are married or engaged. Also its easier to cut out whole groups of people (ie dates, coworkers, bible club members) than risk hurting feelings by only inviting a few Also cut out children- will some couples not be able to come because they can't find sitters? Sure, but it's not my problem to worry about their children. Establish rules and stick to them. Also maybe let it be known before hand that you are planning a very small event. Just remember its your wedding and you don't owe anyone an invite.
Well you sure are a peach aren't you! And she can't say it is a very small event...because she is inviting over 100 people just on her side not including any of her FI's family/invites...
I know most on here don't like it- but I am doing it anyway. The only people who get a date are those who are married or engaged. Also its easier to cut out whole groups of people (ie dates, coworkers, bible club members) than risk hurting feelings by only inviting a few Also cut out children- will some couples not be able to come because they can't find sitters? Sure, but it's not my problem to worry about their children. Establish rules and stick to them. Also maybe let it be known before hand that you are planning a very small event. Just remember its your wedding and you don't owe anyone an invite.
So I would get a date because I have a ring on my finger but my my best friend (who has been with her bf for a week longer than I've been with FI) wouldn't because they have just moved in together and are waiting until they are financially secure to take that step?
I know most on here don't like it- but I am doing it anyway. The only people who get a date are those who are married or engaged. Also its easier to cut out whole groups of people (ie dates, coworkers, bible club members) than risk hurting feelings by only inviting a few Also cut out children- will some couples not be able to come because they can't find sitters? Sure, but it's not my problem to worry about their children. Establish rules and stick to them. Also maybe let it be known before hand that you are planning a very small event. Just remember its your wedding and you don't owe anyone an invite.
So I would get a date because I have a ring on my finger but my my best friend (who has been with her bf for a week longer than I've been with FI) wouldn't because they have just moved in together and are waiting until they are financially secure to take that step?
That's good logic.
Seriously Bubbles, we all know that if you aren't engaged, you aren't serious about your relationship and don't really enjoy attending events with your SO anyway...
I know most on here don't like it- but I am doing it anyway. The only people who get a date are those who are married or engaged. Also its easier to cut out whole groups of people (ie dates, coworkers, bible club members) than risk hurting feelings by only inviting a few Also cut out children- will some couples not be able to come because they can't find sitters? Sure, but it's not my problem to worry about their children. Establish rules and stick to them. Also maybe let it be known before hand that you are planning a very small event. Just remember its your wedding and you don't owe anyone an invite.
So I would get a date because I have a ring on my finger but my my best friend (who has been with her bf for a week longer than I've been with FI) wouldn't because they have just moved in together and are waiting until they are financially secure to take that step?
That's good logic.
Seriously Bubbles, we all know that if you aren't engaged, you aren't serious about your relationship and don't really enjoy attending events with your SO anyway...
I think I'll call my best friend right now and tell her to leave her
boyfriend in England when she comes over for my wedding. Can't be paying
all that money for dinner and drinks for someone that she isn't
committed to.
I know most on here don't like it- but I am doing it anyway. The only people who get a date are those who are married or engaged. Also its easier to cut out whole groups of people (ie dates, coworkers, bible club members) than risk hurting feelings by only inviting a few Also cut out children- will some couples not be able to come because they can't find sitters? Sure, but it's not my problem to worry about their children. Establish rules and stick to them. Also maybe let it be known before hand that you are planning a very small event. Just remember its your wedding and you don't owe anyone an invite.
So I would get a date because I have a ring on my finger but my my best friend (who has been with her bf for a week longer than I've been with FI) wouldn't because they have just moved in together and are waiting until they are financially secure to take that step?
That's good logic.
Seriously Bubbles, we all know that if you aren't engaged, you aren't serious about your relationship and don't really enjoy attending events with your so.
Don't forget if you're not banging, and over 25, you also are not serious about your relationship.
I know most on here don't like it- but I am doing it anyway. The only people who get a date are those who are married or engaged. Also its easier to cut out whole groups of people (ie dates, coworkers, bible club members) than risk hurting feelings by only inviting a few Also cut out children- will some couples not be able to come because they can't find sitters? Sure, but it's not my problem to worry about their children. Establish rules and stick to them. Also maybe let it be known before hand that you are planning a very small event. Just remember its your wedding and you don't owe anyone an invite.
So I would get a date because I have a ring on my finger but my my best friend (who has been with her bf for a week longer than I've been with FI) wouldn't because they have just moved in together and are waiting until they are financially secure to take that step?
That's good logic.
Seriously Bubbles, we all know that if you aren't engaged, you aren't serious about your relationship and don't really enjoy attending events with your SO anyway...
I think I'll call my best friend right now and tell her to leave her
boyfriend in England when she comes over for my wedding. Can't be paying
all that money for dinner and drinks for someone that she isn't
committed to.
Good to know my mother and stepfather's 20+ year relationship doesn't count. Buy a house, a couple cars, raise some kids, put them through college, pay for the first one's wedding, raise a dog, but none of that shit matters. No ring no bring, amirite?
Re: How to cut down the guest list of the wedding
Make your list starting with immediate family (parents, siblings + SOs) then branch out to aunts and uncles, the cousins. Do a separate list of your friends. Only put people that you're close to or that you see on a regular basis. Add the lists together and see what you have. If you still need to cut you can start with either friends or family, up to you. Cousins may get cut, or maybe you decide to only invite aunts/uncles/cousins that you see regularly. If you haven't seen aunt Mildred in 15 years you might decide to cut her.
It can be done. People may be hurt, but most will understand that weddings are expensive and not everyone can be invited.
That's good logic.
I think I'll call my best friend right now and tell her to leave her boyfriend in England when she comes over for my wedding. Can't be paying all that money for dinner and drinks for someone that she isn't committed to.
Don't forget if you're not banging, and over 25, you also are not serious about your relationship.
Previously Alaynajuliana
I THOUGHT PEOPLE LIKED ME. Now I know that I'm just awful.
Who are the people that you care about and are regular participants in your lives?
Invite those people.
Done.
You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.