So due to switching jobs and medical issues, my bridesmaid dress shopping was put off until about a month ago (5 months before the wedding) I did mention to my four bridesmaids over the summer that we would be going in November and that I would certainly take into consideration their general financial situations. My four bridesmaids consist of my sister (MOH), a friend I have known 18 years, another I have known 17 years, and my fiance's cousin.
My sister, my friend of 18 years, and I went to two different shops to try on several dresses. My friend happens to be fairly large up top and has little to no hips/butt, so I wanted to find a dress that she would feel lovely in. After 4 hours, we found the perfect dress and it would look great on everyone and was priced at $166. Everything seemed perfect until three weeks goes by and my friend has still not gone for measurements or put her order in. Finally 2 weeks ago she tells me "I can't be in your wedding I can't afford it." So I tried to help her out by offering to put in the order for the dress and she can always pay me back at another time. She continues to put me off and says "Just replace me then." This coming from her, who just purchased a $600 camera and loves to go drinking on Friday and Saturday nights and spends money on other frivolous stuff. Finally she gave me a final answer of she just can't afford to be in my wedding.
Here are my two issues: First, my (old/ex) bridesmaid doesn't understand now why I am pissed at her. She thinks I should be okay w/everything.
My 2nd dilemma..I would like my wedding to look symmetrical (same amount of bridesmaids to groomsmen). I have two close friends at work; one I directly work with every day and another I talk to quite frequently. I have known the teacher I talk to frequently longer, but I have become better friends with the coworker I work with. How do I ask either of them? I don't want to offend them where they feel they were chosen 2nd, but I also feel bad choosing between one or the other.
So my two questions are: Do I have a right to be mad at the bridesmaid who dropped out of my wedding and how do I go about choosing a new bridesmaid w/out offending anyone, including the person I choose?