Singing at my wedding

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

So I want to sing with my dad at my wedding... is this something that could come off as AWish? I do not want to be the center of attention at all- even though it is my wedding. In fact I'd rather have someone else be, but singing is a passion of mine and my dad does it as a career so singing has always been something we feel strongly about. I am a pretty good singer but don't want to come off as though my father and I are trying to show off. Should we not do this? Does this generally come off as good or bad at weddings?

QueerFemme · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:ffccf21e-2f8d-40c9-8530-c6a744a50344">Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]So I want to sing with my dad at my wedding... is this something that could come off as AWish? I do not want to be the center of attention at all- even though it is my wedding. In fact I'd rather have someone else be, but singing is a passion of mine and my dad does it as a career so singing has always been something we feel strongly about. I am a pretty good singer but don't want to come off as though my father and I are trying to show off. Should we not do this? Does this generally come off as good or bad at weddings?
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

This WILL come off as AWish. If your father wants to sing, I probably wouldn't side-eye it as much. But, if the bride or groom do a performance of any sort, it comes off as "ohhh, look at me. Look at how special and talented I am".

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

I figured someone might say that... let me ask you though, what if said father and daughter also happen to be great dancers- is that still showing off or not since a father/daughter dance is expected but singing is not? Either way, whether we sing or dance or both, could it be construed as showing off?

Ultimately my father is paying for the wedding so I can't say no to him if he wants to sing. He sang at my sister's and she didn't want it, but again he paid, so how do you really say no?

QueerFemme · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:403b70d5-5c36-4503-acaa-7471ff834dab">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]I figured someone might say that... let me ask you though, what if said father and daughter also happen to be great dancers- is that still showing off or not since a father/daughter dance is expected but singing is not? Either way, whether we sing or dance or both, could it be construed as showing off?
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

I think it depends on the type of dance. Are father and daughter, who happened to be great dancers, doing a waltz? Or are they doing an overly choreographed PERFORMANCE.

Any time there is a <strong><u>performance</u></strong>, it comes across as AWIsh. People still do it, but that doesn't mean it doesn't get side-eyed by guests. Also, as a guest at plenty of weddings.... those performances are also usually very boring for the guests.

GoodLuckBear14 · October 2012

The only time I have seen something like this NOT come off as AWish is when a friend of mine who is an Irish musician and her husband who plays Irish fiddle joined the band on stage to play about a half hour or so of Irish music that people were dancing the jigs and reels to. Nobody was really paying attention to the B&G because it had turned into a ceili at that point.

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:344c3f68-1c2c-4bdb-bbd7-5b537204ccab">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Singing at my wedding : I think it depends on the type of dance. Are father and daughter, who happened to be great dancers, doing a waltz? Or are they doing an overly choreographed PERFORMANCE. Any time there is a performance , it comes across as AWIsh. People still do it, but that doesn't mean it doesn't get side-eyed by guests. Also, as a guest at plenty of weddings.... those performances are also usually very boring for the guests.
Posted by cmgilpin[/QUOTE]

I have found some performances to be entertaining although one wedding I went to the bride's sister sang and she was terrible. I want to look at it at and say that everyone is there for us so they will enjoy it, but that might not be correct. People are already asking if I'm going to be singing... it wouldn't be out of character if I did and in fact, it would probably be out of character if I didn't, but again, asking b/c I'm not sure how appropriate this is for one's own wedding.

QueerFemme · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:e42b9e03-a40f-449e-a47d-4b3fc04471ed">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Singing at my wedding : I have found some performances to be entertaining although one wedding I went to the bride's sister sang and she was terrible. I want to look at it at and say that everyone is there for us so they will enjoy it, but that might not be correct. People are already asking if I'm going to be singing... it wouldn't be out of character if I did and in fact, it would probably be out of character if I didn't, but again, asking b/c I'm not sure how appropriate this for one's own wedding.
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

Well, if memory serves me, you also didn't find a donation card at weddings offensive. I think you must just be a perfect guest, becuase you find nothing AWish or offensive.

Just because people are asking you if you are going to sing, doesn't mean you have to. And just because your father sang at your sister's wedding, doesn't mean he has to sing at yours, even if he is paying. You could have a conversation with him and say "Dad, I really don't want to have any performances at the wedding. I hope you understand". He might get butt hurt for a minute, but honesty goes a long way with most people. Do you honestly think your father would say "well FUCCKKKK you then. If I can't sing at your wedding, I'm not paying!"?

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

No he would def still pay but he would be really hurt, I know. I guess I wouldn't mind him singing alone but I really want to join him b/c we used to sing together all the time when I was little... it has a special place in my heart.

I try to not find things offensive b/c I'm an easy-going person and I try to make the best of all situations. Personally if someone is paying for you to attend a wedding and are feeding you and buying you drinks, you really shouldn't complain about it. That's MY feeling anyway.

Yeahhh not sure if i will sing now... ughhh I really want to.

QueerFemme · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:a253c3a7-d568-4d4a-9980-c822312d96ac">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]No he would def still pay but he would be really hurt, I know. I guess I wouldn't mind him singing alone but I really want to join him b/c we used to sing together all the time when I was little... it has a special place in my heart. I try to not find things offensive b/c I'm an easy-going person and I try to make the best of all situations. Personally if someone is paying for you to attend a wedding and are feeding you and buying you drinks, you really shouldn't complain about it. That's MY feeling anyway. Yeahhh not sure if i will sing now... ughhh I really want to.
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

Why don't you do a song at the rehearsal dinner?

Edit: Which, by the way, will STILL be AWish, but at least it doesn't stop the flow of your wedding so you and your father can have a spotlight moment.

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:e13e8b65-f25d-4bc2-b4c7-765107591e31">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Singing at my wedding : Why don't you do a song at the rehearsal dinner? Edit: Which, by the way, will STILL be AWish, but at least it doesn't stop the flow of your wedding so you and your father can have a spotlight moment.
Posted by cmgilpin[/QUOTE]

I think that would be more AWish b/c the rehearsal dinner will be at a restaurant and it will probably be open to the public so we would be disturbing people's dinner. I feel like a wedding there is already going to be music, so it's not like we are disturbing anyone... sometimes people at a restaurant just want to eat and don't enjoy music.

If I do this, it will be at the weding not at the rehearsal dinner, but I probably won't do it at all.

QueerFemme · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:2449e274-3e01-48ca-ad37-818774f59eac">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Singing at my wedding : I think that would be more AWish b/c the rehearsal dinner will be at a restaurant and it will probably be open to the public so we would be disturbing people's dinner. I feel like a wedding there is already going to be music, so it's not like we are disturbing anyone... sometimes people at a restaurant just want to eat and don't enjoy music. If I do this, it will be at the weding not at the rehearsal dinner, but I probably won't do it at all.
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

Ahhhh, well, maybe consider having the rehearsal dinner somewhere more private, or in a restaurant with a private banquet room.

No matter what, doing this is going to be AWish. I know you say that you probably won't do it at all, but I get the feeling, in the same way I got the feeling about your other post about the donation cards, you really just want someone to co-sign this idea.

Like, waaaaaaaaaa, but I wanna do this, and this is why... Dad loves to sing, his feelings will be hurt, I really want to, No one will be offended, people are asking me already, people will already being enjoying the music, there is music and entertainment already, it won't disturb anyone, we are providing free food and liquor, why would this bother them?, people will be there for us... etc. etc. etc. etc.

If you want to do it so badly, then do it. But, if you think people won't be side-eyeing you, and being like, "um, WTF was that. I thought this was a wedding and not a lounge act", you are kidding yourself. Yes, of course, people love you and want you to be happy, and they will still talk shittt about you behind your back.

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:8aefa786-7094-4268-92ce-75d572c6fa45">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Singing at my wedding : <strong>Ahhhh, well, maybe consider having the rehearsal dinner somewhere more private, or in a restaurant with a private banquet room.</strong> No matter what, doing this is going to be AWish. I know you say that you probably won't do it at all, but I get the feeling, in the same way I got the feeling about your other post about the donation cards, you really just want someone to co-sign this idea. Like, waaaaaaaaaa, but I wanna do this, and this is why... Dad loves to sing, his feelings will be hurt, I really want to, No one will be offended, people are asking me already, people will already being enjoying the music, there is music and entertainment already, it won't disturb anyone, we are providing free food and liquor, why would this bother them?, people will be there for us... etc. etc. etc. etc. If you want to do it so badly, then do it. But, if you think people won't be side-eyeing you, and being like, "um, WTF was that. I thought this was a wedding and not a lounge act", you are kidding yourself. Yes, of course, people love you and want you to be happy, and they will still talk shittt about you behind your back.
Posted by cmgilpin[/QUOTE]

FI's family is taking care of this- it's not up to me.

I guess I am looking for people to say this is ok. I've been at weddings where it was done and the only time I side-eyed it was when the bride's terrible sister sang... mostly I just felt embarrassed for her... but if people are legitimately good, I have never side-eyed it or thought bad things about it or thought they were showing off. Most of the time I was pretty entertained. I'm asking b/c I don't know if what *I* feel is what the general public feels. Thanks for the input.

QueerFemme · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:2e0108df-b2c5-49b9-9dc1-093517d090a9">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Singing at my wedding : FI's family is taking care of this- it's not up to me.
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

Well, then. I guess you are ass out.

yoshijo · October 2012

I would think that any kind of performance by the bride or groom or even close family member is AWish. A band or dj should be the performers. It is not the place for that at a wedding no matter if the person is a professional or not. To me it feels like the person is trying to show off. You are getting advice but instead of accepting it you are trying to convince people it is ok.

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:123b314d-690c-418d-acf4-9bfb24c1cf4e">Re:Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]I would think that any kind of performance by the bride or groom or even close family member is AWish. A band or dj should be the performers. It is not the place for that at a wedding no matter if the person is a professional or not. To me it feels like the person is trying to show off. You are getting advice but instead of accepting it you are trying to convince people it is ok.
Posted by yoshijo[/QUOTE]

No I appreciate the advice- I just don't know why this so frowned upon... I've never frowned upon it... genuinely curious as to why... or am I just too nice? lol

lls31 · October 2012

I personally think it would be a bit AWish. I know several people who are musicians and they did not play at their own weddings. If they had, I probably would've side-eyed it.

ETA: Also, if you don't want to be the center of attention, this is the absolute last thing I would recommend doing. Putting on a show is going to draw ALL attention to you and your father.

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

ok, fair enough... but why? Not everyone who performs at their own wedding is trying to show off. I guess for mine, I'm just trying to have that moment with my dad. I guess our dance could be our moment, but we didn't dance together when I was little, we sang. It probably wont make a difference to the guests- a show is a show- but not everyone has the intention of showing off about it. That probably doesn't matter, I'm just saying.

Would this be ok let's say if my dad and I were terrible singers but were just doing it b/c we enjoy it?

yoshijo · October 2012

Well I think its because you see it from a different perspective. It is your dad and Im sure it is sentimental for you. And maybe a few close family members or friends may think it is sweet. But personally I think that should be done in a more private setting. It just gives off a look at me vibe to me . That's just my opinion.

lls31 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:e9bc4bca-d296-4271-b826-c099b5690e43">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]ok, fair enough... but why? <strong>Not everyone who performs at their own wedding is trying to show off.</strong> I guess for mine, I'm just trying to have that moment with my dad. I guess our dance could be our moment, but we didn't dance together when I was little, we sang. It probably wont make a difference to the guests- a show is a show- but not everyone has the intention of showing off about it. That probably doesn't matter, I'm just saying. Would this be ok let's say if my dad and I were terrible singles but were just doing it b/c we enjoy it?
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

<div>I have never known anyone to perform at their own wedding. </div><div>
</div>

QueerFemme · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:e9bc4bca-d296-4271-b826-c099b5690e43">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]ok, fair enough... but why? Not everyone who performs at their own wedding is trying to show off. I guess for mine, I'm just trying to have that moment with my dad. I guess our dance could be our moment, but we didn't dance together when I was little, we sang. It probably wont make a difference to the guests- a show is a show- but not everyone has the intention of showing off about it. That probably doesn't matter, I'm just saying. Would this be ok let's say if my dad and I were terrible singers but were just doing it b/c we enjoy it?
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

And again, it sounds like you are really trying to argue why you think this is a good idea. It isn't.

You are going to have thousands of moments with your dad. I am guessing he is walking you down the aisle. You will be doing a father/daughter dance. Maybe he will give a toast at the wedding. All of those will be special. Any sort of performance is AWish.

Your wedding isn't a play or theatrical moment. Being good singers is not only irrelevant, but its about preference. I may hate the way you or your father sing. But, whether I liked your particular voice or not, I would still think it was a ridiculous LOOK AT ME.LOOK AT ME!!! moment.

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

It isn't a look at me moment if the person sucks, but I get it.

A dance would still be a performance... especially my father, he makes everything a performance.

I'm not trying to justify my want, I'm just seeking honesty, honestly... lol.

Is there anyone out there who isn't bothered by this besides me? I mean I really cannot be the only one who wouldn't be bothered or side eye a performance. This may be b/c all my friends are thespians and musicians and have done it but regardless... Bueller??

courtski2004 · October 2012

I had a few non-verbal shoutouts to my dad during our ceremony. He is a gifted piano player, and I used to play the violin. We would perform duets when I lived at home, and I included two of those songs in my ceremony. He walked me down the aisle to 'Pachelbel's Canon in D', and the song played during our unity candle lighting was 'Ashokan Farewell'. Those moments were touching for us both, and I didn't care if our guests knew the importance or not. Would he have played the piano while I played the violin during the reception? Yes, gladly. I chose to include those special moments during the ceremony because it wasn't our performance hour. I'm sure a handful of guests would have enjoyed it, but I know it would have bored most of our guests to tears.

Maybe he could dedicate a song to you in place of a toast at the reception while people are being served?

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:74f45434-d685-415f-9ae5-2dca90e05933">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]I had a few non-verbal shoutouts to my dad during our ceremony. He is a gifted piano player, and I used to play the violin. We would perform duets when I lived at home, and I included two of those songs in my ceremony. He walked me down the aisle to 'Pachelbel's Canon in D', and the song played during our unity candle lighting was 'Ashokan Farewell'. Those moments were touching for us both, and I didn't care if our guests knew the importance or not. Would he have played the piano while I played the violin during the reception? Yes, gladly. I chose to include those special moments during the ceremony because it wasn't our performance hour. I'm sure a handful of guests would have enjoyed it, but I know it would have bored most of our guests to tears. Maybe he could dedicate a song to you in place of a toast at the reception while people are being served?
Posted by courtski2004[/QUOTE]

he could... it just sucks I have to change my plans now, lol. He would want me to sing with him for sure... so I think he wouldn't even be interested in that.

QueerFemme · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:d6903e2b-78d8-4f02-863c-a819c09f69e7">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]It isn't a look at me moment if the person sucks, but I get it. A dance would still be a performance... especially my father, he makes everything a performance. I'm not trying to justify my want, I'm just seeking honesty, honestly... lol. Is there anyone out there who isn't bothered by this besides me? I mean I really cannot be the only one who wouldn't be bothered or side eye a performance. This may be b/c all my friends are thespians and musicians and have done it but regardless... Bueller??
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

I have bunches of musician and actors as friends. Not one of them would ever consider performing at their own weddings. A friend of mine who is a professional jazz vocalist and flautist was even worried about playing the flute at MY wedding, because she knows a lot of the guests and didn't want to seem AWish. It wasn't even her wedding.

More people than you think will side-eye it. The ones who don't will be bored and wish it was over. Seriously, people are bored during the father/daugther and mother/son dances also, but they sit through it because it's just expected at a wedding. But, no one WANTS to see the father/daughter dance. They are just happy when it's over.

KatWAG · October 2012

Has anyone seen the episode of bridezillas where the bride sings at her reception? OP I suggest you look it up.

FWIW, I agree with PPs, its a bad idea.

jcg98 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:d6903e2b-78d8-4f02-863c-a819c09f69e7">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>It isn't a look at me moment if the person sucks, but I get it.</strong> A dance would still be a performance... especially my father, he makes everything a performance. I'm not trying to justify my want, I'm just seeking honesty, honestly... lol. Is there anyone out there who isn't bothered by this besides me? I mean I really cannot be the only one who wouldn't be bothered or side eye a performance. This may be b/c all my friends are thespians and musicians and have done it but regardless... Bueller??
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

<div>It's a "look at me" moment whether the person sucks or not. And let's face it, a lot of people think they are better singers then they are. Case in point, your friend's sister.</div><div>
</div><div>My H and I are both professional musicians, and we did not perform at our wedding. Now, when I was dancing with my dad (definitely NOT a singer, LOL) we sang to each other while dancing because the song I picked was one from my childhood. But it was completely spontaneous and there were definitely no mics involved.</div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>
</div>

lls31 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:2bcd93ad-5c60-4d6a-b0bb-314070740671">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]My .02. I think anything (aka a performance) that implies that people should applaud you afterward is weird on a wedding day. People don't applaud the father/daughter dance at the end. They might clap when the bride and groom are announced at the end of the ceremony, or when they enter the reception, but that's about it. They can also ignore you during the first dance or the father/daughter dance because it's designed to be a moment between you and your husband or dad - they don't need to watch it. Singing, on the other hand, demands an audience because it is a performance. Since the reception is a thank you to the guests, you shouldn't make them be appreciative of you / your talents during it.
Posted by kwitherington[/QUOTE]

<div>This! I couldn't have said it better myself!</div>

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

In Response to Re:Singing at my wedding:[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Singing at my wedding:It isn't a look at me moment if the person sucks, but I get it. A dance would still be a performance... especially my father, he makes everything a performance. I'm not trying to justify my want, I'm just seeking honesty, honestly... lol. Is there anyone out there who isn't bothered by this besides me? I mean I really cannot be the only one who wouldn't be bothered or side eye a performance. This may be b/c all my friends are thespians and musicians and have done it but regardless... Bueller??Posted by OwningAHome1981I have bunches of musician and actors as friends. Not one of themnbsp;would ever consider performing at their own weddings.nbsp; A friend of mine who is a professional jazz vocalist and flautist was even worried about playing the flute at MY wedding, because she knows a lot of the guests and didn't want to seem AWish.nbsp; It wasn't even her wedding.nbsp;nbsp;nbsp;More people than you think will sideeye it.nbsp; Thenbsp;ones who don't will be bored and wish it was over.nbsp;nbsp;Seriously, people are bored during the father/daugthernbsp;and mother/son dances also, but they sit through it because it's just expected at a wedding. But, no one WANTS to see the father/daughter dance.nbsp;nbsp; They are just happynbsp;when it's over.nbsp; Posted by cmgilpin[/QUOTE]

I think dances can be boring too thats why I threw the singing idea out there... Plus its more sentimental to us... But bc father/daughter dances can be boring thats why I know my father will make it into a performance he is a showman he does everything big... So wondering if I need to scrap the dance then too?

AmandaSC1988 · October 2012

I totally agree that the Bride or Groom shouldn't be performing in wedding, it looks AWish.

I am actually really surprised by the answers about the father singing. FIL and MIL both were in the choir and were cantors for the church we got married in. We opted to get other people so they didn't have to work our wedding, but FIL sang 2 songs throughout the course of our Nuptial Mass, he wasn't AW or anything, he was just as professional as he would have been at any other wedding he sang at, there was no announcement except for a small note in the program. (FYI The Church we got married in has a choir loft and went up there when it came time for him to sing so it wasn't like he was in front of everyone). It was something H had always envisioned his father doing throughout the years.

ETA - different songs are typical during a Catholic mass, it wasn't like his songs were above and beyond what a normal ceremony was....there was no applause

FFIW - H and his mom danced to a song that she sang to him when he was younger, that might be an option to keep the spotlight dance special for both of you.

samantha24p · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_singing-at-my-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1a7bff3f-8e4b-4149-9dd7-1700c76fa7b9Post:96a0161b-25f0-4929-bf84-b017d5e71618">Re: Singing at my wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]Has anyone seen the episode of bridezillas where the bride sings at her reception? OP I suggest you look it up. FWIW, I agree with PPs, its a bad idea.
Posted by KatWAG[/QUOTE]

I was just thinking of that.

OwningAHome1981 · October 2012

In Response to Re:Singing at my wedding:[QUOTE]I find it odd that you don't want to be the center of attention yet your post on LOOK AT WHAT WE DID: DONATION FOR YOU and wanting to peform with your dad are exactly that. nbsp;Are you worried about not gettig enough attention? nbsp;You will. nbsp;Even without your AW donation card or singing, you'll be receiving plenty of attentioin. nbsp;You just contradict yourself and I agree with PP, you're really just looking for people to validate a bad idea. Posted by jcbsjr[/QUOTE]

Dad and I singing together is not about attention it is about sharing a moment and having some fun together.

I understand how it comes off but it has nothing to do with attention.

I didnt say it was a good idea or not, but no I'm not looking for attention.

Singing at my wedding

Re: Singing at my wedding

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