Hey , I'm so sorry you r going thru this. Not seeing you on mother's day bc mother in law more important. Nonsense . Sounds like the gf is a chip off old block of mom. Sounds like sons gf is a well....brat. idk best advice other than talk to your soon about how you'd like to be with him more , or make plans to take walks, lunches , etc things that don't break the bank. Invite son and gf or if gf doesn't come just son. Start to do all you can to make effort to be with son away from this so he can make sure it's what he wants . You are his mother , you deserve to be held high
July 12
Re: Crazy Ex sent wedding gift
[QUOTE]Yes we both have her blocked now. But she has called from random phone numbers before to try and reach him. Any suggestions for a sentence that is polite that basically says "don't contact us ever again"?
Posted by sarah8smack[/QUOTE]
a legally worded restraining order from the court system?
[QUOTE]Yes we both have her blocked now. But she has called from random phone numbers before to try and reach him. Any suggestions for a sentence that is polite that basically says "don't contact us ever again"?
Posted by sarah8smack[/QUOTE]
<div>OMG. Are you not listening?</div><div>
</div><div>Any communication with her,<em> regardless of the actual content of that communication</em>, is going to reinforce her idea that it is OK for her to contact you.</div><div>
</div><div>You say, "Please don't call us again."</div><div>She hears, "They answered me! They love me! I will call them always!"</div><div>
</div><div>You say, "Thanks, but we can't accept your wedding gift."</div><div>She hears, "They love me! I will go to their wedding."</div><div>
</div><div>You say, "Stay far, FAR away from us for the rest of time!"</div><div>She hears, "Call us every day!"</div><div>
</div><div>Do. Not. Reply. To. Her.</div>
It doesn't seem like you're dealing with a normal person. Any communication/response from you or your FI, no matter the content, will give her the idea that she still has a chance.
Here is what you do:
1. Grab that gift.
2. Drive to BBB.
3. Tell them you are refusing the gift from your registry.
4. Let them handle the return/refund of crazy girls' money.
5. Drive home.
You (or your FI) do not contact her. At all. Done.
News flash: you don't need other people's cash any more than you need a chip and dip set.
Also, listen to DG on this stalker thing. If you insist on responding in any way, then you are willingly feeding the drama. DG's guy wrote a book, but my undergrad major was animal behavior, and a) she will see any attention as positive reinforcement, so you'll only encourage her to continue this behavior, and b) the only thing more powerful than positive reinforcement is intermittent positive reinforcement. See also, why some people will stuff quarters into slot machines for hours on end. Ignoring her for a while and then eventually responding is actually the worst thing you can do if you want to discourage her.
DITTO.
[QUOTE]Maybe you need to have a face to face convo with this EX, because it sounds like she's looking to get back into his pants. He's brushing you off, he probably wants to get some last mminute banging in if he hasn't already done it! I'd reconsider marrying someone who is probably cheating on you and this is the EX's way of letting oyu know that something is going on.
Posted by FlaNYtattoogirl[/QUOTE]
<div>Flany, have you always been a troll or is this a new hobby for you? I thought you used to be a normal poster.</div><div>
</div><div>To the OP, keep us updated on crazypants. Despite it being drastic, you may be safer with a restraining order at this point--I believe she can't contact you at all (without getting in trouble) that way? I also vote for wedding security of some sort, so you and FI won't be worrying about her crashing the day of. </div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Crazy Ex sent wedding gift : Flany, have you always been a troll or is this a new hobby for you? I thought you used to be a normal poster. To the OP, keep us updated on crazypants. Despite it being drastic, you may be safer with a restraining order at this point--I believe she can't contact you at all (without getting in trouble) that way? I also vote for wedding security of some sort, so you and FI won't be worrying about her crashing the day of.
Posted by missfrodo[/QUOTE]
Not Me!