BIL'S on/off/on wedding (updated, end)

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

DH's brother called at 8 a.m. and said the wedding today was off because all the JOP offices were closed.

Called back at 10 a.m. and said they found one open in a town about 35 minutes away, and can we still come, the wedding is now at 2.

Agreed to still come.

DH hung up with BIL, and not 10 seconds later, BSC granny called and said, 'The wedding has been moved, so what time are you picking me up?'

Didn't bother to ask first if we were still going, just assumed.

DH got short with her and said we'd be there at 1.15. She says she's ready now and she's been ready all morning.

Y'all, I have had neither coffee NOR alcohol yet today. It's gonna be a long day.

ETF word TK ate. Wtf?

kmmssg · February 2014

They sell those little bottles of Bailey's irish cream - you will need them for your coffee.

grumbledore · February 2014

Hang in there!

FiancB · February 2014

This much back and forth the day of? Doesn't sound too... well planned.

Perhaps granny will start sharing some of her cray with the new DIL?

climbingsingle · February 2014

Ay yi yi! This is going to be a mess, for sure.

pumpkinsandturkeys · February 2014

I've been waiting all week for today. Not because FI and I are going out for a really nice dinner, but because I'm dying to hear what a train wreck this is going to be.

However, I feel bad that you have to endure it and I'm sending you allllllll the V-Day wine, cookies, and chocolates.

mellyD2014 · February 2014

I'm with @pumpkinsandturkeys . We'll be looking forward to an update! Make sure you make up for your current lack of alcohol later today!

firebabe6519 · February 2014

*whipping up a Godiva chocolate liqueur and peppermint schnapps latte for you*

Good luck with BSC granny!

Chipmunk415 · February 2014

Yesterday, I found smaller champagne bottles with a wrist strap...I'd send several to you, but I'm not sure it would get there in time. Also sending a virtual version of the chocolate/peanut butter fudge brownies I made for my office.

Evil Chipmunk suggests strapping BSC grandma to the roof of the car when driving her- the cold air will be invigorating for her, and keep her occupied without bothering you. Tell her its a beauty treatment to make sure she has roses and cream cheeks and lips for the photos.

chibiyui · February 2014

There's a loooot of little liquor stores in PA.....

cruffino · February 2014

hang in there. and happy first married valentines day!

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

chibiyui said:
There's a loooot of little liquor stores in PA.....

But the ones here are all closed because of the damn snow!!

@cruffino, thanks, and you, too!

chibiyui · February 2014

HisGirlFriday13 said:

There's a loooot of little liquor stores in PA.....
But the ones here are all closed because of the damn snow!! @cruffino, thanks, and you, too!

Oh, that blows.

Of course, I can't say I'm surprised, I called off today because I literally can not get out of the driveway.

afox007 · February 2014

kmmssg already gave you the best advice Bailey's and coffee is MUCH needed today! Can't wait to see the updates on this shit show. I'm out of wine, but have FI's homemade cider ready and waiting.

SmileDamnit · February 2014

Oh, snap! Sending zen AND booze vibes your way. Be safe, stay sane, and be prepared to debrief cuz we'll all be eagerly awaiting the recap!

MobKaz · February 2014

Can you give them all up for Lent?

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

We have picked up BSC granny. DH is driving. I'm backseat Knotting.

Granny is wearing a polyester pant/sweater combo and garish clown make-up. Her justification for the outfit is not that's it's a slushy mess outside (it is and that would make sense) but that this 'isn't a real wedding since they've been living together for so long and there's no preacher so I don't have to dress nice.'

Well OK then.

We bought her a V-Day card (my idea, you're welcome DH), and she was effusively thankful to DH until he said it was all Mr and then she was like, 'Oh. Thanks I guess.'

And to make small talk, DH wants me to tell her about my new job. I'm going to slap him.

cruffino · February 2014

Loving the play by play. Tell her your new job is working for a religious organization trying to get converts to Catholicism, especially Lutherans.

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

We're all here except MOB. DH's parents aren't coming (MIL not invited and FIL boycotting in protest).

Granny has been making small talk with FSIL's grandmother, and they're taking turns insulting each other over whose fault (BIL or FSIL) it was for the pregnancy (11 years ago) and the long-delayed wedding.

lyndausvi · February 2014

Love the play-by-play.

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

Y'all are keeping me sane here.

Chipmunk415 · February 2014

HisGirl, what's FSIL's grandma wearing?

I have a mental image of BSC grandma dressed the way my bio grandma used to- teal or pink sweatsuit and house shoes, with wild hair and oversize glasses. She had a legit excuse- she was in her 80s with advanced alzheimers; these outfits were comfortable for her, warm, and easy for my mom to clean/get her in and out of.

Since "it's not a real wedding," it wouldn't offend her if you suggested to BIL and FSIL they consider coming to mass with you on occasion and offering a blessing on the marriage, right?

If all else fails, favorite Irish Blessing:

May you have food and rainment/A soft pillow for your head/ May you have 40 years in Heaven/ Before the Devil knows you're dead

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

BSC granny just hugged BIL and SIL and told DH's nephew, 'Congrats, you're not a bastard anymore. You're almost a family.'

That started WWIII with FSIL's side of the family, as one might imagine.

Chipmunk415 · February 2014

HOLY SHIT.

If you really want to screw with BSC granny, tell her the Church must give a dispensation legitimizing the child.

If I were the nephew, I'd have decked her.

*grabs moose munch for more updates*

firebabe6519 · February 2014

Oh dear God! I can't imagine someone saying that to a child! How awful!

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

Nephew is not quite 10. He just looked like he wanted to cry. DH looked furious.

I took granny to the parking lot. I don't want to spend time with her but SIL doesn't deserve this bullshit on her wedding day.

lyndausvi · February 2014

To grandma:

garnetandgold60 · February 2014

@HisGirlFriday13 I'm usually more of a lurker/here-or-there poster but I just had to comment. BSC granny's comment made me laugh so hard my dog just gave a me a startled look and got off the couch next to me! I can see how that would start WWIII but holy crap, if you're gonna be rude you might as well go all in, apparently.

Fingers crossed for y'all at the after-lunch and here's hoping they have a good wine and liquor selection!

P.S. I've been looking for an excuse for this gif...and I can only imagine this is how everyone else reacted to that comment, and then how you reacted since you'd be updating us on TK of the ensuing crazy...

ETA: I think it's an absolutely AWFUL thing to say to anyone, let alone a child, but my laugh was more of a "Holy Shit, I cannot believe someone actually said that!" laugh. If that makes sense. I'm not heartless, I promise!

Chipmunk415 · February 2014

as a child born out of wedlock whose parents later married....HisGirl, please smack granny with my compliments.

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

Oh and BSC granny just told me DH and I are 'selfish and rude' for having plans tonight that mean we can't take BIL and SIL out to dinner and that mean we can't watch nephew overnight.

Excuse me while I find a margarita machine and shove my face in it.

Chipmunk415 · February 2014

granny needs a big dose of STFU.

HisGirl, let me know when you arrive in FL. The margarita bucket is waiting.

BIL'S on/off/on wedding (updated, end)

Re: BIL'S on/off/on wedding (updated, end)

Choose Another Board

Search Boards