She left a message, because he didn't answer the phone. She's called a number of times since the fiasco of BIL and SIL's wedding, but she hasn't apologised, or even admitted any wrong-doing.
In her message, she told DH she 'wants to have a family dinner on Saturday night for you and your wife (not even HisGirl, just 'your wife') and BIL and SIL (both of whom got mentioned by name), and Nephew and Aunt.'
DH called me and told me about it, and then said, 'I told her no. I called her back and told her that until she apologises to you for her behaviour, neither of us will be seeing her and we certainly won't be having dinner with her.'
(So proud of him!)
So then his Aunt (BSC granny's daughter) called and tried to guilt-trip DH into going to dinner on the grounds that 'we're celebrating BIL's and SIL's wedding, and besides, you don't know how much time Granny has left and this is really important to her.'
DH said, 'HisGirl and I have already celebrated BIL's and SIL's wedding with them, thankyouverymuch, and if Granny is worried about her mortality, perhaps she should think about how she treats people and be worried about that instead.'
Aunt sputtered and hemmed and hawed and finally said, 'Well, you should just get over it and accept that that's how she is.'
DH said, 'Nope. Actions have consequences. If your action is to treat my wife horribly, the consequence is that you don't get to see her OR me. She comes first -- always, forever.'
Aunt said a few more kind of guilt-trippy things, then hung up.
I'm SO PROUD of DH for standing his ground, because it's hard for him, but I am also SO ANGRY at BSC Granny and Aunt.
I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'