Please close

vegasgroom · March 2014

Since no moderators appear to be watching, please close the following uncharacteristic drama-causing threads on the Vegas board.

http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/1014118/unfortunately
http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/1013979/we-had-a-big-argument
http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/992963/feeling-confused-vent

[Deleted User] · March 2014

Hey @vegasgroom! Thanks for sending along...looking into it now.

-KP

KrisLSmiley · April 2014

@KnotPorscha- any update on closing these? vegasgroom always is looking out for this board and he's right, these should be closed. Thanks

KatWAG · April 2014

Why should these threads be closed? It doesnt break any TOS. I thought the Knot Gods promised to stop closing threads simply because the OP didnt get the advice/ validation they wanted.

And can an individal poster request a thread be closed, when they didnt start the thread?

[Deleted User] · April 2014

Hey guys,

I haven't seen any comments on those threads that violate our TOS, but please feel free to page me if you do. I'll also keep an eye on them!

Thanks!

KP

doeydo · April 2014

What exactly in those threads qualify them for closing? I don't see anything wrong with them.

vegasgroom · April 2014

I'm not clear why you guys care about a topic (Vegas) that is not something you participate in. In any case, the reason for the request was because those threads were WAY out of line from the normal behavior of people in that topic, and it does not sit well with newcomers to the Vegas forum nor many of the regulars; some of whom were in the threads and later apologized to one another. Newbies come to learn about having a wedding in Vegas, not to see drama. Is there tons of drama in other forums? Yes, and it has been there forever. In those, it would be a lot more appropriate to let a thread run its course, to an extent, but in the Vegas forum, it is not. This is why states have their own laws; what's good for one group of people with certain interests may not be for others. Don't get worked up that people in the Vegas forum don't like to see drama threads while in others they relish in them.

KatWAG · April 2014

vegasgroom said:

I'm not clear why you guys care about a topic (Vegas) that is not something you participate in. In any case, the reason for the request was because those threads were WAY out of line from the normal behavior of people in that topic, and it does not sit well with newcomers to the Vegas forum nor many of the regulars; some of whom were in the threads and later apologized to one another. Newbies come to learn about having a wedding in Vegas, not to see drama. Is there tons of drama in other forums? Yes, and it has been there forever. In those, it would be a lot more appropriate to let a thread run its course, to an extent, but in the Vegas forum, it is not. This is why states have their own laws; what's good for one group of people with certain interests may not be for others. Don't get worked up that people in the Vegas forum don't like to see drama threads while in others they relish in them.

::eye roll::

The Vegas sub board is still a part of The Knot. It has to follow the same TOS as the rest of the boards. And the Knot Gods should implement those rules evenly across all boards.

The Vegas board is not the special snowflake of TK forums.

vegasgroom · April 2014

Same TOS yes, it doesn't mean there should not be different styles of moderation applied to one topic versus another. SB has drama nearly expected just based on its name, a city-specific board, not so much. I'm sorry you're upset because you didn't get what you wanted on a board you like to hang out on, but the Vegas topic was drama free for several years and now it's not. So I guess congratulations are in order, it's now being run like the rest of the site and the users in that topic are less happy, so consistency has been achieved.

KatWAG · April 2014

vegasgroom said:

Same TOS yes, it doesn't mean there should not be different styles of moderation applied to one topic versus another. SB has drama nearly expected just based on its name, a city-specific board, not so much. I'm sorry you're upset because you didn't get what you wanted on a board you like to hang out on, but the Vegas topic was drama free for several years and now it's not. So I guess congratulations are in order, it's now being run like the rest of the site and the users in that topic are less happy, so consistency has been achieved.

And who decides and enforces the different types of moderation? Its a really slippery slope, which is why its best to have one overaching set of rules.

If the users on the Vegas Board are that unhappy, why do so many keep coming back?

doeydo · April 2014

vegasgroom said:

I'm not clear why you guys care about a topic (Vegas) that is not something you participate in. In any case, the reason for the request was because those threads were WAY out of line from the normal behavior of people in that topic, and it does not sit well with newcomers to the Vegas forum nor many of the regulars; some of whom were in the threads and later apologized to one another. Newbies come to learn about having a wedding in Vegas, not to see drama. Is there tons of drama in other forums? Yes, and it has been there forever. In those, it would be a lot more appropriate to let a thread run its course, to an extent, but in the Vegas forum, it is not. This is why states have their own laws; what's good for one group of people with certain interests may not be for others. Don't get worked up that people in the Vegas forum don't like to see drama threads while in others they relish in them.

What the what? How about free speech? Do you really want this forum to be moderated by people who delete threads and/or ban users because the conversations were not "normal behaviour"? If you don't like those threads just don't click on them, for Pete's sake.

doeydo · April 2014

Right, I meant "free speech" as in people having different opinions and being able to say what they want as long as they don't break the TOS.

vegasgroom · April 2014

KatWAG said:

And who decides and enforces the different types of moderation? Its a really slippery slope, which is why its best to have one overaching set of rules.

If the users on the Vegas Board are that unhappy, why do so many keep coming back?

That would be because there is no other wedding-specific site that has information on getting married in Vegas. That joke of a forum wedding bee, if you can actually post there without getting banned for having come from TK, averages about ten threads per year. The others are equally useless.

There should not need to be any formal decision making process or code of conduct on a topic by topic basis, it comes from the normal ebb and flow of the users in that topic.

vegasgroom · April 2014

shrekspeare said:

Ditto this. Also, you can't have different levels of moderation on different boards. Isn't that what got all of the previous mods kicked out? Some were ban happy and others were more lax? If people are so unhappy, there are always other sites available.

I know you're not naive enough to believe the mods all being removed was based on different styles of moderation; if one is rubbing their members the wrong way, they're easy enough to replace.

We've all been on here long enough to know the no notice moderator purge, and the behind the scenes "secret moderator" fiasco paid by Amazon gift cards, was solely a XO Group control decision because moderators weren't towing the company line which is do whatever is in the interest of XO Group's financials and nothing else.

vegasgroom · April 2014

doeydo said:

What the what? How about free speech? Do you really want this forum to be moderated by people who delete threads and/or ban users because the conversations were not "normal behaviour"? If you don't like those threads just don't click on them, for Pete's sake.

My one and only interest is helping people get married in Vegas; that's why I still participate post-wedding. I did not ask that people be banned, threads be deleted or their free speech rights be violated, as laughable as that claim is in this context; I asked that two threads that had clearly run their course, resulting in members who had previously been friends hurling insults at each other, simply be closed. Fortunately some made up about the mess afterward, but , someone coming in and stoking the coals days, weeks or months later would not help matters.

Like I said, you want to keep those kinds of threads open indefinitely in other forums where drama is a daily thing, fine, it just wasn't routine for that board. It also isn't good for a board where most people are newcomers; all it takes is a couple drama threads to pop up to the top on a day someone new rolls in, they think it's always like that, they move on trying to plan their Vegas wedding with the very little useful information that can be found online. I simply did not want someone having a less than optimal wedding experience because of a dumb thread.

doeydo · April 2014

Again, there was nothing in those threads that warrant them being closed. Personally, I am glad you are no longer a moderator.

vegasgroom · April 2014

Feel better now?

MobKaz · April 2014

vegasgroom said:

doeydo said:

What the what? How about free speech? Do you really want this forum to be moderated by people who delete threads and/or ban users because the conversations were not "normal behaviour"? If you don't like those threads just don't click on them, for Pete's sake.

My one and only interest is helping people get married in Vegas; that's why I still participate post-wedding. I did not ask that people be banned, threads be deleted or their free speech rights be violated, as laughable as that claim is in this context; I asked that two threads that had clearly run their course, resulting in members who had previously been friends hurling insults at each other, simply be closed. Fortunately some made up about the mess afterward, but , someone coming in and stoking the coals days, weeks or months later would not help matters.

Like I said, you want to keep those kinds of threads open indefinitely in other forums where drama is a daily thing, fine, it just wasn't routine for that board. It also isn't good for a board where most people are newcomers; all it takes is a couple drama threads to pop up to the top on a day someone new rolls in, they think it's always like that, they move on trying to plan their Vegas wedding with the very little useful information that can be found online. I simply did not want someone having a less than optimal wedding experience because of a dumb thread.

There are newcomers on any given board on any given day. Not only are new posters new to wedding planning, very often they are new to internet forums as well. If all it takes is a few threads to "scare a newcomer off", then they probably weren't ready for internet forums. Many women on many of the boards encourage newcomers to lurk to get a feel for posters, questions, and the way responses are given. It affords newcomers an opportunity to adjust to the diversity of the boards, and to make informed and independent decisions as to whether internet forums are for them. Censoring and/or closing any thread defeats the purpose of an international, internet forum. Let the newcomers decide for themselves.

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