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Yeah...so this just happened...

RebeccaB88RebeccaB88 member
First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
edited May 2014 in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Friend just received a wedding invitation that included not only the registry info and cash bar info, but...

A menu that listed meals available for purchase, prices, as well as tax and mandatory 18% gratuity.  Plus the admission fee to the aquarium the reception is held at.

It's also an in-law so she has to attend. I will absolutely share the report on the shitshow that happens later.

Said person is also a transplant to a northern state from a southern state, and frequently gets snarky with my friend about the 'lack of manners up here'. 


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Re: Yeah...so this just happened...

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    climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
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    Holy shitballs. Bring a gift, pay admission and buy your meal. Yup, sounds like a great plan. 
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    countrygirl061513countrygirl061513 member
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    That sounds awful. Can't wait to read the update.

     *Formerly ctexasgurl26 and mrsridings061513*

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    CrazyCatLady3CrazyCatLady3 member
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    Did they include credit card slips to take deposits too?  You know, to make sure no one stiffs them at the end of their meal.
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    beachyone15beachyone15 member
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    sarah1551 said:
    She is NO Southerner....
    YAY! That was my 100th comment!


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    lyndausvilyndausvi mod
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    edited May 2014
    Once again I will say... ... Cash bars are the down fall of the art of hosting. Once it's okay to have your GUESTS open their wallets for a beverage someone will take it to the next level. GRRR






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    beetherybeethery member
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    As a southern transplant to a northern state, I am ashamed of this B&G who thought all that shit is ok. The damn menu with prices is a whole new level of garbage. Nooooo fucking ma'am. NAW.
    --

    I'm the fuck     out.

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    catlady14catlady14 member
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    It's funny how it is often jokingly suggested to SS to just charge an entry fee to their wedding to make it easier to get cash from guests but this is requires entry fee AND paying for your own meal?!
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    PrettyGirlLostPrettyGirlLost member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    FFS I'm a "Yankee" and this would never fly with anyone I know!

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


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    lyndausvilyndausvi mod
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    PrettyGirlLost said:
    FFS I'm a "Yankee" and this would never fly with anyone I know!
    That would not fly in  my mid-Atlantic or DH's Long Island social circles.  Like at all.  They may have gaps, but they sure as hell host their guests properly otherwise. 






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    PrettyGirlLostPrettyGirlLost member
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    lyndausvi said:
    PrettyGirlLost said:
    FFS I'm a "Yankee" and this would never fly with anyone I know!
    That would not fly in  my mid-Atlantic or DH's Long Island social circles.  Like at all.  They may have gaps, but they sure as hell host their guests properly otherwise. 
    So what I hear you saying is that this is a regional thing?

    :-P

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


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    windiewindie member
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    I included a note about the entrance fee for our ceremony site (its a state park) but so they would know to tell the gate they are with our wedding, so our guests DON'T have to pay!

    was the registry info for a honeyfund too?

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    melbensomelbenso member
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    Billing guests for their meals?  That's so much worse than a potluck wedding.

    Tacky. Tacky. Tacky.

    I'm predicting about a 5% acceptance rate on those invites: Wedding party and close family, might consider it.
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    SmileDamnitSmileDamnit member
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    Ha!
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    This invite wins the "hell to the nizzo" award...and makes the wedding last weekend look like a dream.
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    phiraphira member
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    If I *had* to go, I'd suddenly come down with the flu. Or I'd attend the ceremony and then suddenly come down with the flu.
    Anniversary
    now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
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    climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
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    PrettyGirlLost said:
    FFS I'm a "Yankee" and this would never fly with anyone I know!
    Seriously! That shit don't fly in NY/NJ, I'll tell ya that. 
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    lyndausvilyndausvi mod
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    PrettyGirlLost said:
    lyndausvi said:
    PrettyGirlLost said:
    FFS I'm a "Yankee" and this would never fly with anyone I know!
    That would not fly in  my mid-Atlantic or DH's Long Island social circles.  Like at all.  They may have gaps, but they sure as hell host their guests properly otherwise. 
    So what I hear you saying is that this is a regional thing?

    :-P
    he he.  Well those are 2 different regions and 2 different social circles.   You decide.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 member
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    RebeccaB88 said:
    We suggested the gift be a copy of Miss Manners with post it tabs attached to strategic pages.

    She has her own blog, so she's hoping to be able to live-blog the whole thing. Stay tuned.
    When is this wedding and what is the blog. This is going to be juicy!
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    HisGirlFriday13HisGirlFriday13 member
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    I jus woke up from a nap, so maybe I'm still groggy, but what the what now?!
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    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
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    lyndausvilyndausvi mod
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    I have to say as a former event coordinator/bartender/waitstaff/every other job in catering industry I can not wrap my head around the logistics of this?   I've worked for many venues/restaurants/etc I can't think of any who allows for split checks 100+ ways.   

    How the hell is this going to even work?








    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    ElcaBElcaB member
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    If you "have" to go, go...and get them nothing but a lovely card. 
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    gladyscfgladyscf member
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    Sounds like they will have someone there with Square on their phone for the convenience. 

    *Rolled my eyes so hard I have a headache now*
    *msstaticfancypants*
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    Simply FatedSimply Fated member
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    lyndausvi said:
    I have to say as a former event coordinator/bartender/waitstaff/every other job in catering industry I can not wrap my head around the logistics of this?   I've worked for many venues/restaurants/etc I can't think of any who allows for split checks 100+ ways.   

    How the hell is this going to even work?


    Every server's worst nightmare.
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    ShellD13ShellD13 member
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    I have hosted birthday dinners and the like at restaurants and if we are an extremely small party - I'll download a copy of the menu from the website and dress it up/reprint it without prices with the expectation that people could order whatever they want without worrying about cost (although I will admit I have on occasion excluded those menu items that would be budget busters) but asking people to pay for their reception meal?????  Yikes!
    Anniversary
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    FizzySipsFizzySips member
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    RebeccaB88 said:
    Friend just received a wedding invitation that included not only the registry info and cash bar info, but...

    A menu that listed meals available for purchase, prices, as well as tax and mandatory 18% gratuity.  Plus the admission fee to the aquarium the reception is held at.

    It's also an in-law so she has to attend. I will absolutely share the report on the shitshow that happens later.

    Said person is also a transplant to a northern state from a southern state, and frequently gets snarky with my friend about the 'lack of manners up here'. 



    FFS what are they actually hosting?? What an etiquette nightmare. Nightmare. Metal rooster, if anything.
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