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Surprised @ how rude....

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Re: Surprised @ how rude....

  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Karen you should really change your username if that is your real first and last name.
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  • spedteach1102spedteach1102 member
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    misshart00 said:

    Here's the thing. We get one of these "all of you are so mean!!!" posts about once a week. Making a post like this is not going to make people change. If you don't like how the forum is, you don't have to stay here. Now, I'm not saying get out by any means. I'm saying that different Internet forums have different dynamics. If you don't like this one, there are hundreds of others out there. The Internet is a big place. I just don't understand why you hang around somewhere where you hate everyone and think they're all so horrible. Furthermore, if you really think people are so mean, call them out in the individual thread. Creating a new thread looks weak. If you call someone out, own it.


    I was under the impression that the chit chat boards purpose was to post stuff that doesn't necessary have a specific board. I don't hate everyone here and it was my thoughts as I was reading three threads this evening on the etiquette board. To be honest after I posted my comment I saw another thread that this was also being discussed. That was the first time I saw a thread about the subject of others rudeness on here. You may think it looks weak. However, me trolling thru threads turning into a "rudeness" police would be way too time consuming. I'm a mom of 4, a special education teacher to 15 students and I'm planning a wedding no time to police grown women.(but I can vent) I frequent this forum maybe once or twice a week as I think of questions that personally pertain to me. I look up post because my question may be answered through someone else's thread. I'm not individually calling out people because that's just childish.. I posted because I was venting. Maybe to see if anyone could relate to my experience thus far or maybe I was wrong to think that way. However, the first few responses proved my point.
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  • spedteach1102spedteach1102 member
    10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    huskypuppy14 said:

    Karen you should really change your username if that is your real first and last name.

    Thanks although it was my first name and not my full last name. I changed it anyway. Just in case.
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  • spedteach1102spedteach1102 member
    10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    I'm sorry I missed my post where I stated I hated this site. I made an observation. Yes as an outsider looking in.... My post was MY observation of what I deem as some pretty obnoxious women. If you are not one of those women who enjoy making fun of others' questions, tagging your knot friends to join in the fun and turn post into games then this post does not pertained to you.
    Just as you are allowed your opinions and your freedom to post, I also may post my opinions. Do I think that my venting is going to change any of you or your thinking? Nope.....
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I never understand people who make these posts and then say they didn't intend to or think they would change anyone or anything. What's the point of such a post, then?
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited May 2014
    AddieCake said:
    I never understand people who make these posts and then say they didn't intend to or think they would change anyone or anything. What's the point of such a post, then?

    * STUCK IN BOX

    $1Million question.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I don't even know! I am terrible at keeping track of my squares, @JCbride2015!
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Rebl90Rebl90 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    How do I always miss the start of one of these threads???? Geez, no wonder I still feel like a newbie, I miss all the good stuff!

    And where is Tony???
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  • spedteach1102spedteach1102 member
    10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    beethery said:

    I try to be as nice as possible if someone is asking a question, is soliciting advice, or needs help. If the person, in turn, gets crabby when they don't like the answers, and starts being a dick, I'm going to bring it right back to them. 


    I will occasionally acknowledge trolls, because at base level, it is entertaining. Also, it means I get to use gifs. Like this one!

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    I do love me some NeNe!!!

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  • spedteach1102spedteach1102 member
    10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    lyndausvi said:


    AddieCake said:

    I never understand people who make these posts and then say they didn't intend to or think they would change anyone or anything. What's the point of such a post, then?

    * STUCK IN BOX

    $1Million question.



    It's called venting -- (verb) to give public utterance to: to vent one's opinions
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I've been an English teacher for 14 years. I don't need a definition. And it doesn't answer the question, either, really. It makes no sense to vent that here with no expectation of change.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • spedteach1102spedteach1102 member
    10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    JCbride2015 said:


    spedteach1102 said:

    I'm sorry I missed my post where I stated I hated this site. I made an observation. Yes as an outsider looking in.... My post was MY observation of what I deem as some pretty obnoxious women. If you are not one of those women who enjoy making fun of others' questions, tagging your knot friends to join in the fun and turn post into games then this post does not pertained to you.
    Just as you are allowed your opinions and your freedom to post, I also may post my opinions. Do I think that my venting is going to change any of you or your thinking? Nope.....

    But this is a community.  We all know each other and have running little jokes.  It doesn't mean we're making fun of the OP, just that we're having fun.  See the difference?

    @AddieCake and @beethery how many BINGOs did you make today? <--not making fun of you, OP.  Just having some fun.

    Yes actually I do. And honestly I didn't look at it from that point of view. I can admit that I may be sensitive to the way others speak to each other and how I perceive it. It's probably the fact that I am a special education teacher that makes me more sensitive to how people respond and interact with others. I admit I get a tad defensive. I still feel like some (not all) threads I've read have some mean nasty post that just aren't necessary in my opinion. I do come back to this site because I do find some helpful comments when reading others threads.
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  • SmileDamnitSmileDamnit member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    AddieCake said:
    I don't even know! I am terrible at keeping track of my squares, @JCbride2015!
    At least SIX! Pretty sure I've been drunk since 10:00 am. 
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  • misshart00misshart00 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    Please stick around OP. It is a really awesome community once you get to know us.
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    But that's the thing. You don't think what a lot of us post is necessary, and we don't think these venting posts about what we post are necessary. It's silly to come into a community and try to tell people how to post.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • beetherybeethery member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    edited May 2014
    The main thing to keep in mind when it comes to internet forums is that tone gets lost in these kinds of conversations. I can say something and look like the Grand Marshal of the Shitdick Parade (I try not to), when I am being facetious.

    It's the internet, shit happens, it isn't that serious.

    ETA: I'm going to paraphrase from a delightful young lady who appeared on Bad Girls Club. If you aren't fucking, feeding, or financing me, you don't get to tell me what to do. Anybody can complain about how I post, but if they expect me to give a shit they're going to find that I come up short.
    --

    I'm the fuck     out.

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  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    This thread was helpful. How did I miss that Jenna was a troll. Damn meetings and work this morning!
    SmileDamnit said:
    JCbride2015 said:
    spedteach1102 said:
    I'm sorry I missed my post where I stated I hated this site. I made an observation. Yes as an outsider looking in.... My post was MY observation of what I deem as some pretty obnoxious women. If you are not one of those women who enjoy making fun of others' questions, tagging your knot friends to join in the fun and turn post into games then this post does not pertained to you. Just as you are allowed your opinions and your freedom to post, I also may post my opinions. Do I think that my venting is going to change any of you or your thinking? Nope.....
    But this is a community.  We all know each other and have running little jokes.  It doesn't mean we're making fun of the OP, just that we're having fun.  See the difference?

    @AddieCake and @beethery how many BINGOs did you make today? <--not making fun of you, OP.  Just having some fun.
    This IS a community. It's made up by a number of women (and men - hi Tony!) who have come together with a like-minded interest in weddings…marriage…relationships…life. We are of all ages, locations, walks of life, and opinions, but we have invested the time it takes to develop a rapport with each other and it gets mind numbing when there are near daily posts from people who don't take the time to either read the BAZILLION other posts asking the exact.same.question OR get a sense of the community's culture. 

    Are we rude? I'm going to say 9.5 times out of 10, the answer is NO. Blunt…harsh…honest…snarky…unbiased? You betcha. See, if you would take the time to lurk a little more, you'd find that there are actually faaaarrrr more threads of support - support for the young woman who is questioning her fiancé's fidelity, or the one who unexpectedly lost a loved one (NOT the one who lied and pretended to), or the one who has a crazy Gma but a stellar husband, or the one who is busting ass to get through school while working full time, or the one who is struggling with in-law boundaries, or the one who just loves cake. THIS is what I love and appreciate about this community. That, and the gifs…and bingo.

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  • KGold80KGold80 member
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    Cheers! On my 3rd glass now. :)
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  • APDSS22APDSS22 member
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    I really do try to post with class.  Not always treacle nice, but with class.  Some posters do get frustrated with the frequency with which the same questions will get asked and lose it a bit or not be as diplomatic as they are otherwise, but the great thing about the internet is you can just ignore them until they either regain their control or stop posting.

    I really do appreciate the community we have here, so I really don't like vent posts in this community that are venting about this community.  It never goes over well.  If you want to vent about something your FI won't understand or your besties are sick of or that is just too real to share with people who know who you are, here are a bunch of internet strangers that can give you a straight opinion, a kick in the rear, sympathy/empathy or point out something you might not have noticed. 

    That being said OP, thanks for at least trying to see the other side of things after your initial post.
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