Wedding gift... have you heard of this?

kimberly0315 · May 2014

We are invited to a wedding in August. We won't be able to attend so I went on their wedding website to RSVP. They aren't sending formal invitations, just a postcard directing you to their website. This is where you RSVP and they have a gift section. They registered on Amazon, which is fine. Then they listed their bank accounts and paypal account to give money. Is this new? I would never dream of giving out my paypal and bank account details so people could give us money.

I didn't like the idea of no formal invitation (but that is a personal preference). But I felt like it was a bit cheeky to post 2 different bank accounts and a paypal to give money. Am I missing something? I would never never do this, but maybe I'm a bit old school. Just curious what your thought are.

Cheers.

Viczaesar · May 2014

kimberlyw939 said:

We are invited to a wedding in August. We won't be able to attend so I went on their wedding website to RSVP. They aren't sending formal invitations, just a postcard directing you to their website. This is where you RSVP and they have a gift section. They registered on Amazon, which is fine. Then they listed their bank accounts and paypal account to give money. Is this new? I would never dream of giving out my paypal and bank account details so people could give us money.
I didn't like the idea of no formal invitation (but that is a personal preference). But I felt like it was a bit cheeky to post 2 different bank accounts and a paypal to give money. Am I missing something? I would never never do this, but maybe I'm a bit old school. Just curious what your thought are.
Cheers.

My thoughts are that they (the couple) are horribly rude and tacky.

KGold80 · May 2014

Oh my god. Are you serious? No formal invitation and bank and paypal accounts to give money? I can't even....

misshart00 · May 2014

This seems like a good way to get your bank account info stolen. Especially if it's an open website available to anyone.

phira · May 2014

Ahahahaha oh hell no.

Grabows14 · May 2014

No, I never heard of this. I would believe that would leave you pretty vulnerable.

Can't stop tacky

HisGirlFriday13 · May 2014

That's one of the tackiest things I've ever heard of, and I've been on TK long enough to hear some seriously tacky-ass shit.

sweetwisconsin · May 2014

In a world of identity theft this is just an all around bad idea. As for the online RSVP I also think this is in poor taste. When it comes to invites, go traditional. One of my friends got married 4 years ago and they utilized the online RSVP because her H was a graphic designer. It was a huge mess. A lot of people didn't RSVP because it was confusing. Some people just randomly showed up. They ended up having to call 1/3 of their guest list. It caused them more of a headache in the end.

kimberly0315 · May 2014

I'm not sure what the deal is. I thought maybe I was missing something. Apparently not. I agree, it is extremely tacky and I'm absolutely shocked. I couldn't even imagine specifically asking for money. It is just so weird!

beethery · May 2014

sweetwisconsin said:
In a world of identity theft this is just an all around bad idea.

As for the online RSVP I also think this is in poor taste. When it comes to invites, go traditional. One of my friends got married 4 years ago and they utilized the online RSVP because her H was a graphic designer. It was a huge mess. A lot of people didn't RSVP because it was confusing. Some people just randomly showed up. They ended up having to call 1/3 of their guest list. It caused them more of a headache in the end.

UUUUGH. I'm a GD and I know not to trust web stuff. The OP gives me the willies SO BAD, because it's, 1. Super fucking TACKAAAYYYY and 2. PayPal can be extremely odd about holding onto your money. Plus they take a fee. Not to mention the complaints I've seen about TK wedding tools making a mess of things.

I am designing our STDs, invitations, RSVP cards, and any other printed materials we end up needing. I'm going to include mini pre-stamped postcards with standard yes/no checkboxes for attendance and meal choice. That's it. Some things, if they ain't broke, don't need fixing. RSVP cards have worked great for a long time, and I can easily fill out my google spreadsheet for the guest list myself, without relying on faulty PHP modules and adding another web project I don't want to my pile of stuff to do.

I still can't get past that they basically have a paypal donation button on their website. So much GURL bye. Sooooo much.

MNVegas · May 2014

That is really disgusting! Can't believe how rude these people are.

climbingsingle · May 2014

Tacky! And gross!

Lizzieyounce · May 2014

Very tacky and it would rate one of these, (monogrammed with the happy couples monogram) as a gift…

theartistformerlyknownas · May 2014

That is horrifying.

ElcaB · May 2014

That is tack WAIT FOR IT...

...y.

smalfrie19 · May 2014

How gross..no thanks. I asked someone last night were they were registered and they told me "Bank of America" I was like "ok...cash"

beethery · May 2014

smalfrie19 said:

How gross..no thanks. I asked someone last night were they were registered and they told me "Bank of America" I was like "ok...cash"

I don't have other words for that shit.

Cookie Pusher · May 2014

chibiyui · May 2014

kimberlyw939 said:

We are invited to a wedding in August. We won't be able to attend so I went on their wedding website to RSVP. They aren't sending formal invitations, just a postcard directing you to their website. This is where you RSVP and they have a gift section. They registered on Amazon, which is fine. Then they listed their bank accounts and paypal account to give money. Is this new? I would never dream of giving out my paypal and bank account details so people could give us money.
I didn't like the idea of no formal invitation (but that is a personal preference). But I felt like it was a bit cheeky to post 2 different bank accounts and a paypal to give money. Am I missing something? I would never never do this, but maybe I'm a bit old school. Just curious what your thought are.
Cheers.

I would get them this

bmydesigner · May 2014

beethery said:

In a world of identity theft this is just an all around bad idea. As for the online RSVP I also think this is in poor taste. When it comes to invites, go traditional. One of my friends got married 4 years ago and they utilized the online RSVP because her H was a graphic designer. It was a huge mess. A lot of people didn't RSVP because it was confusing. Some people just randomly showed up. They ended up having to call 1/3 of their guest list. It caused them more of a headache in the end.
UUUUGH. I'm a GD and I know not to trust web stuff. The OP gives me the willies SO BAD, because it's, 1. Super fucking TACKAAAYYYY and 2. PayPal can be extremely odd about holding onto your money. Plus they take a fee. Not to mention the complaints I've seen about TK wedding tools making a mess of things. I am designing our STDs, invitations, RSVP cards, and any other printed materials we end up needing. I'm going to include mini pre-stamped postcards with standard yes/no checkboxes for attendance and meal choice. That's it. Some things, if they ain't broke, don't need fixing. RSVP cards have worked great for a long time, and I can easily fill out my google spreadsheet for the guest list myself, without relying on faulty PHP modules and adding another web project I don't want to my pile of stuff to do. I still can't get past that they basically have a paypal donation button on their website. So much GURL bye. Sooooo much.

I'm a graphic designer too

I definitely would not want to do online RSVPS. I don't know enough PHP to feel comfortable enough using it. It would be a disaster, and it is most definitely TACKYYYYY.

Also, I can't get past the fact that these people have their bank account & information online where anyone can see it!

MandyMost · May 2014

Totally agree that it's tacky and terrible and all that...

...BUT, we live in a world that is becoming more and more comfortable with online banking. While I have a checkbook, I probably only write out a few checks a year at most. I wouldn't be surprised if pretty soon people (especially young people) don't have a checkbook at all. There needs to be a non-tacky way to give someone money electronically, because pretty soon that's going to be the only way we deal with money.

wrigleyville · May 2014

MandyMost said: Totally agree that it's tacky and terrible and all that...
...BUT, we live in a world that is becoming more and more comfortable with online banking. While I have a checkbook, I probably only write out a few checks a year at most. I wouldn't be surprised if pretty soon people (especially young people) don't have a checkbook at all. There needs to be a non-tacky way to give someone money electronically, because pretty soon that's going to be the only way we deal with money.

---------------------------
Whoa. The box disappeared.

A few people asked if they could PayPal us and wanted to confirm my email address before they did so. We didn't put that option on our wedding site, though. I can't imagine doing something that tacky. I felt bad even when they ASKED for my email address, but I figured it was sort of like confirming my mailing address so they could send a check. They were asking me, so it wasn't like a money grab. I still felt sort of icky, though.

luckysnorkel · May 2014

kimberlyw939 said:

We are invited to a wedding in August. We won't be able to attend so I went on their wedding website to RSVP. They aren't sending formal invitations, just a postcard directing you to their website. This is where you RSVP and they have a gift section. They registered on Amazon, which is fine. Then they listed their bank accounts and paypal account to give money. Is this new? I would never dream of giving out my paypal and bank account details so people could give us money.
I didn't like the idea of no formal invitation (but that is a personal preference). But I felt like it was a bit cheeky to post 2 different bank accounts and a paypal to give money. Am I missing something? I would never never do this, but maybe I'm a bit old school. Just curious what your thought are.
Cheers.

When I read the bolded I blurted out "WHOA." out loud. At work. I never do that.

Not only is it tacky and rude, it's really reckless. Echoing the PPs who said they hope that website is password-locked (although it's still a dumb move regardless).

larrygaga · May 2014

Ohhh, they posted two accounts so you could pick your choice of where your money goes. How cute and fun!

bananasplit472001 · May 2014

No this is not a new thing. People should not be asking for anything when offering an invite to their wedding.

kitty8403 · May 2014

bmydesigner said: beethery said: In a world of identity theft this is just an all around bad idea. As for the online RSVP I also think this is in poor taste. When it comes to invites, go traditional. One of my friends got married 4 years ago and they utilized the online RSVP because her H was a graphic designer. It was a huge mess. A lot of people didn't RSVP because it was confusing. Some people just randomly showed up. They ended up having to call 1/3 of their guest list. It caused them more of a headache in the end. UUUUGH. I'm a GD and I know not to trust web stuff. The OP gives me the willies SO BAD, because it's, 1. Super fucking TACKAAAYYYY and 2. PayPal can be extremely odd about holding onto your money. Plus they take a fee. Not to mention the complaints I've seen about TK wedding tools making a mess of things. I am designing our STDs, invitations, RSVP cards, and any other printed materials we end up needing. I'm going to include mini pre-stamped postcards with standard yes/no checkboxes for attendance and meal choice. That's it. Some things, if they ain't broke, don't need fixing. RSVP cards have worked great for a long time, and I can easily fill out my google spreadsheet for the guest list myself, without relying on faulty PHP modules and adding another web project I don't want to my pile of stuff to do. I still can't get past that they basically have a paypal donation button on their website. So much GURL bye. Sooooo much. I'm a graphic designer too

I definitely would not want to do online RSVPS. I don't know enough PHP to feel comfortable enough using it. It would be a disaster, and it is most definitely TACKYYYYY.
Also, I can't get past the fact that these people have their bank account & information online where anyone can see it!

----boxes go bye-bye---
Exactly. I can't imagine being that idiotic. You can't fix stupid.

adverb1129 · May 2014

That bank account idea is tacky and extremely unsafe. I get anxiety just thinking about hosting that kind of private information online.

However, I think that is a different discussion from online RSVPs being tacky. I had online RSVPs and didn't run into any problems- hope none of the guests were offended

ashleyep · May 2014

beethery said:

In a world of identity theft this is just an all around bad idea. As for the online RSVP I also think this is in poor taste. When it comes to invites, go traditional. One of my friends got married 4 years ago and they utilized the online RSVP because her H was a graphic designer. It was a huge mess. A lot of people didn't RSVP because it was confusing. Some people just randomly showed up. They ended up having to call 1/3 of their guest list. It caused them more of a headache in the end.
UUUUGH. I'm a GD and I know not to trust web stuff. The OP gives me the willies SO BAD, because it's, 1. Super fucking TACKAAAYYYY and 2. PayPal can be extremely odd about holding onto your money. Plus they take a fee. Not to mention the complaints I've seen about TK wedding tools making a mess of things. I am designing our STDs, invitations, RSVP cards, and any other printed materials we end up needing. I'm going to include mini pre-stamped postcards with standard yes/no checkboxes for attendance and meal choice. That's it. Some things, if they ain't broke, don't need fixing. RSVP cards have worked great for a long time, and I can easily fill out my google spreadsheet for the guest list myself, without relying on faulty PHP modules and adding another web project I don't want to my pile of stuff to do. I still can't get past that they basically have a paypal donation button on their website. So much GURL bye. Sooooo much.

I'm a web developer, and as much as I've enjoyed building random crap on my website that no one will look at (photos pulled from instagram!), I'm smart enough to know that while I'm super tech savvy, not everyone else is. We'll use normal RSVP cards (and Google docs to track them) because I can't deal with the repercussions if something online crashes. There's no guarantee that something I write (or a plug in I find) will be bug free.

beethery · May 2014

ashleyep said:

beethery said:

In a world of identity theft this is just an all around bad idea. As for the online RSVP I also think this is in poor taste. When it comes to invites, go traditional. One of my friends got married 4 years ago and they utilized the online RSVP because her H was a graphic designer. It was a huge mess. A lot of people didn't RSVP because it was confusing. Some people just randomly showed up. They ended up having to call 1/3 of their guest list. It caused them more of a headache in the end.
UUUUGH. I'm a GD and I know not to trust web stuff. The OP gives me the willies SO BAD, because it's, 1. Super fucking TACKAAAYYYY and 2. PayPal can be extremely odd about holding onto your money. Plus they take a fee. Not to mention the complaints I've seen about TK wedding tools making a mess of things. I am designing our STDs, invitations, RSVP cards, and any other printed materials we end up needing. I'm going to include mini pre-stamped postcards with standard yes/no checkboxes for attendance and meal choice. That's it. Some things, if they ain't broke, don't need fixing. RSVP cards have worked great for a long time, and I can easily fill out my google spreadsheet for the guest list myself, without relying on faulty PHP modules and adding another web project I don't want to my pile of stuff to do. I still can't get past that they basically have a paypal donation button on their website. So much GURL bye. Sooooo much.

I'm a web developer, and as much as I've enjoyed building random crap on my website that no one will look at (photos pulled from instagram!), I'm smart enough to know that while I'm super tech savvy, not everyone else is. We'll use normal RSVP cards (and Google docs to track them) because I can't deal with the repercussions if something online crashes. There's no guarantee that something I write (or a plug in I find) will be bug free.

Sometimes, I get tired of being the IT support person for my friends and family. I know that if I just give them something to check off and drop in the mail, they aren't going to fuck it up or have to ask me for help. I might be a dick for that, but I've accepted it.

FILs are absolutely terrified of buying/paying for/DOING anything online (read: they have somehow managed to never ever have to do this at all), FBIL/FSIL are the same way. I know not everyone we invite will be like that, but I also know that it is far less likely for me to have to walk anyone through signing in or having to find where I fucked up some code if I just go the analog route.

photokitty · May 2014

If the B&G are all tree hugging green hippies and they send a postcard to save trees, landfills and the whales...and they live like this every freaking day of their lives...I'm cool wight he postcard and the online RSVPs.

I refuse to acknowledge that they posted their bank and paypal accounts...this can't be real...no one can be this dumb and tacky all at once...barf

selenathegreat · May 2014

For a wedding I am going to this weekend the b&g posted on their FB page (sigh) some weird app that I can give them money on. Yeah no. I would rather have a PayPal link.

I'm down with the online RSVPs, personally, but as (yet another) graphic designer I was SO EXCITED to design our invites, no way they were going online. I can't wait to get our cards back!

Wedding gift... have you heard of this?

Re: Wedding gift... have you heard of this?

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