Wedding Etiquette Forum

wedding party

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Re: wedding party

  • Bahahaha, @Addiecake you are by far my favourite person right now! At this rate, OP will be having a cash bar, dollar dance, big gap, putting registry info in her invites with a full-on honeyfund, and not to mentioning designating duties to all of her "brideslaves" and any other loved ones she can boss around.

    OP, I know you think all us ladies here are "big meanies" but if you told a friend to not get a tattoo of hello kitty on her face and then she got all huffy because you are trying to explain to her why it is a bad idea and talk her out of it you would start to get pretty darn annoyed too. So take a deep breath, pull up your big girl panties and listen to what people are saying. We are trying to help you. Oh, and when picking your BM's try to limit it to people you could call up any time of the day/night and rely on to help you out, people you couldn't imagine ever being out of your life. Whether that is 2 or 10, it doesn't matter.

    And I just have to use these....

    imageimage

    hehehe

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  • .
    Jen4948 said:
    Addie was being sarcastic.  She's a regular in this forum and has advocated strongly against "back up bridesmaids" in other threads.
    I may have reconsidered my position. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Cute, but still a troll.
  • tcnoble said:

    I can't tell if she just has really poor grammar, spelling, etc. or if she is maybe 12 years old.

    And besides that... she's currently thinking of having 10 bridesmaids. What?

    You guys are just SO MEAN!!!! :)


    Meh, I have 10 BMs. It's not really a big deal. . .they are picking their own dresses, shoes, jewelry, and hair styles.

    I am just responsible for their gifts and bouquets.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • Meh, I have 8.  Some people just have large families/ lots of friends.  I don't judge the number of BMs unless the bride is asking people she isn't really close to just because she wants to have a lot.
    What them girls said. I only have three people because that's all I wanted to have. But if you want 10 or 20 or 42 then yeah have it. But don't just pick people to have a giant entourage. Pick people you're close to.
  • phiraphira member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    MagicInk said:
    What them girls said. I only have three people because that's all I wanted to have. But if you want 10 or 20 or 42 then yeah have it. But don't just pick people to have a giant entourage. Pick people you're close to.
    (edited because so many quotes!)

    Absolutely. It's one thing to say, "These are the people I wanted to honor, and I just happen to have 10 people I want to honor." It's another to say, "I want to have 10 bridesmaids, so I need to fill 10 spots."
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    now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    AddieCake said:
    . I may have reconsidered my position. 
    Oh!
  • tcnobletcnoble member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    Meh, I have 8.  Some people just have large families/ lots of friends.  I don't judge the number of BMs unless the bride is asking people she isn't really close to just because she wants to have a lot.

    Poor word choice on my part. I was more startled at her line of thinking with her BMs.
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  • With the wedding being less then a year away, you need to ask ASAP because depending on where they end up getting their dresses from, they may need to be ordered soon. I would just ask each of them individually over coffee or drinks. After you ask each girl, ask them to get back to you in a week with what price range they would be comfortable paying for their dress and then start looking based on the cheapest budget you are given. You are going to have a very large wedding party. Not sure if you have a strict budget you need to stick with but keep this in mind, for every person you have in your wedding party you need to budget for flowers and wedding gift for. Plus that is another person you have to invite (plus SO) to the rehersal dinner. Also if you plan on renting a limo, the more people you have the larger the limo you will need & the higher the price the limo will be. If you have 20 people, you need a limo bus that will hold 30 people else you will all be sitting hip to hip and you don't want to be that close to people in your dress. Also, how well do these individuals get along? Do they get along great or will there be fights amongst the bridal party for control and clashing personality? You may not think that's your problem, but they will all come to you to complain & make your planning a nightmare.

     

  • Jen4948 said:
    Addie was being sarcastic.  She's a regular in this forum and has advocated strongly against "back up bridesmaids" in other threads.


    Uh oh, I think you burst her bubble....

  • Erikan73 said:

    With the wedding being less then a year away, you need to ask ASAP because depending on where they end up getting their dresses from, they may need to be ordered soon. I would just ask each of them individually over coffee or drinks. After you ask each girl, ask them to get back to you in a week with what price range they would be comfortable paying for their dress and then start looking based on the cheapest budget you are given. You are going to have a very large wedding party. Not sure if you have a strict budget you need to stick with but keep this in mind, for every person you have in your wedding party you need to budget for flowers and wedding gift for. Plus that is another person you have to invite (plus SO) to the rehersal dinner. Also if you plan on renting a limo, the more people you have the larger the limo you will need & the higher the price the limo will be. If you have 20 people, you need a limo bus that will hold 30 people else you will all be sitting hip to hip and you don't want to be that close to people in your dress. Also, how well do these individuals get along? Do they get along great or will there be fights amongst the bridal party for control and clashing personality? You may not think that's your problem, but they will all come to you to complain & make your planning a nightmare.

    Wait, her wedding is in 2015, I don't think she needs to hurry on that. I can't believe that they would need to order dresses soon. What if sizes change? There are plenty of places that will let you order a lot closer to the wedding. I can't imagine being stressed about that at 7 months out.

    What does the bridal party have to fight about? Heck they don't even have to be in the same room until the rehearsal dinner.  I picked my nearest and dearest and expect them to act like adults. If they can't do so, I don't want to hear it. I don't care who did what to who, I'm not going to hear petty arguments. 



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  • Wait, her wedding is in 2015, I don't think she needs to hurry on that. I can't believe that they would need to order dresses soon. What if sizes change? There are plenty of places that will let you order a lot closer to the wedding. I can't imagine being stressed about that at 7 months out.

    What does the bridal party have to fight about? Heck they don't even have to be in the same room until the rehearsal dinner.  I picked my nearest and dearest and expect them to act like adults. If they can't do so, I don't want to hear it. I don't care who did what to who, I'm not going to hear petty arguments. 

     
    STIB
    This is exactly what my FI and I discussed when he was having a hard time choosing between two GMs that had recently had a huge falling out.  I told him that he should choose who he wants, and if that is both of them, then he should ask them both.  They are adults, and I don't see any reason why they can't get along.
     
    As for you OP, please don't have back-up bridesmaids.  And please listen to what these ladies say.  They have helped many brides avoid making some pretty embarassing mistakes (even some little ones that I almost made!) 

  • MagicInk said:
    Oh no, no it's not rude to tell someone their rude idea is in fact rude. You have been horribly misinformed. I'm an artist. Do you know how many time in my life I have had people tell my idea for an art project is shitty and exactly why it is shitty? I listen to those people because they know more then I do and I make appropriate changes. Learning to accept criticism is part of being a grown up. 

    SITB:

    ME TOO! HI!! 
    That is all. Not touching the rest of this, entertaining as it is. 
  • are you guys still going on about this? get over yourselves
  • Marzipan13Marzipan13 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited May 2014
    Crossmyheartxoxo said:
    are you guys still going on about this? get over yourselves
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ETF: SITB
    These are forums, that's what happens.  You asked us.
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  • lilacck28 said:
    Yay two artists! Or maybe more! But for sure, two!!!
  • Marzipan13Marzipan13 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited May 2014
    MagicInk said:
    Yay two artists! Or maybe more! But for sure, two!!!
    Composer / musician here!  I know those artist feels.

    (etf: can't spell today)
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    jerkyanne said:


    Uh oh, I think you burst her bubble....

    Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww....
  • MagicInk said:
    Yay two artists! Or maybe more! But for sure, two!!!

    MagicInk said:
    Yay two artists! Or maybe more! But for sure, two!!!
    I love you artist folk and have complete respect because I could not do what you do, but can someone please tell the teacher in middle school to be nice to art students? We were required to take art and I tried my best, I just had no ability. I have an eye for art and I know what looks wrong, I have no ability to teach it. My art teacher, in 7th grade, told me that I best never try to create anything because I was a terrible artist and I would never make anything worth looking at. :( I tried so hard, I just sucked at it, but I hated everything to do with art until I went to college and realized that most artists weren't that way.

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  • Composer / musician here!  I know those artist feels.

    (etf: can't spell today)
    Performance art counts! It's got art right in there! I'm a dancer too. I can play piano and guitar, but I have great respect for composers, because I couldn't write a jingle if my life depended on.
  • Composer / musician here!  I know those artist feels.

    (etf: can't spell today)
    Graphic designer/watercolor painter here!
    --

    I'm the fuck
    out.

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