FI's ex invited herself to wedding

Re: FI's ex invited herself to wedding

• kitsunegari89 member

  

  May 2014

  They've got a kid together. You 'verbally' invited her. It's kindof a done deal, and it's a nice thing to do.
  

  My colors are "blood of my enemies" and "rage".
  

  
  

  

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• BlackLace2015 member

  

  May 2014

  I really just cant imagine that she is really happy for us. Yes I accepted her FB friend request, because I have nothing to hide and she can "stalk" me all she wants, especially since I am in her son's life. However I never expected her to be commenting on every single post regarding our relationship. Its just very awkward to me. My FI had a very tumultuous 6(ish,I think) relationship with her and this was many years ago (as I stated their son is now 13).His next relationship lasted about 9 years and was also extremely rocky. We are very happy together and communicate extremely well. We all went to high school together and I knew her as a very tough and sometimes nasty girl and I'm just having a hard time accepting that she is so enthusiastic about our happiness? I tried not to get into this because I was asking from a purely etiquette point of view. She has a very off-putting demeanor and I don't like the way she talks in front of the kids, tbh. We attended a bday party for their son and she was in the waiting area of the restaurant talking about how "white is right" and she would never have kids with someone who wasn't white! This was in front of 5 or 6 kids. FI doesn't seem to have a problem with her behavior, just saying that's just the way she is, but I just don't care for it.

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• huskypuppy14 member

  

  May 2014

  You don't have to answer everything on facebook either. Someone comments, and you don't know what to say, say nothing.  I have no idea why you said "of course' if this woman is so horrible.

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• vt&dt member

  

  May 2014

  OP, you do need to send her an invite (her and her SO) since you said you would.

  
  

  But know that if she says snarky things about you and your FI, or stupid things in general at the wedding, that will make her look bad, not you.  I don't know her, but I'd be very surprised if she did say anything negative about you guys there - the WHOLE group will be your family and friends who are genuinely happy and supportive of your marriage.  

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• HisGirlFriday13 member

  

  May 2014 edited May 2014

  BlackLace2015 said: I really just cant imagine that she is really happy for us. Yes I accepted her FB friend request, because I have nothing to hide and she can "stalk" me all she wants, especially since I am in her son's life. However I never expected her to be commenting on every single post regarding our relationship. Its just very awkward to me. My FI had a very tumultuous 6(ish,I think) relationship with her and this was many years ago (as I stated their son is now 13).His next relationship lasted about 9 years and was also extremely rocky. We are very happy together and communicate extremely well. We all went to high school together and I knew her as a very tough and sometimes nasty girl and I'm just having a hard time accepting that she is so enthusiastic about our happiness? I tried not to get into this because I was asking from a purely etiquette point of view. She has a very off-putting demeanor and I don't like the way she talks in front of the kids, tbh. We attended a bday party for their son and she was in the waiting area of the restaurant talking about how "white is right" and she would never have kids with someone who wasn't white! This was in front of 5 or 6 kids. FI doesn't seem to have a problem with her behavior, just saying that's just the way she is, but I just don't care for it.
  
  Not having anything to hide doesn't mean you have to let her in your life. I get FB friend requests all the time from people I went to high school with. I don't dislike them, and I don't have anything to hide, but I also don't have any reason to want them to see what's going on in my life. If I haven't talked to you in the 15+ years since HS graduation, we're unlikely to have much in common now.

  
  

  ETF: WTF, boxes?

  

  
  

  
  

  I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'

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• singinchick13 member

  

  May 2014

  I think you should invite her but then in front of her describe your wedding to be very "diverse". See how she replies. At least that's what I would do, as my stepmother is from Jamaica and a lot of her family will be there, so it really is not the place for someone who has those views.

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