Older bridesmaid post mastectomy/reconstruction

Re: Older bridesmaid post mastectomy/reconstruction

• littlestmonkey member

  

  June 2014

  I'd probably leave this up to her - if she's your only attendant, I'd probably just say to her please find something in navy that you're comfortable with. While the majority of bridesmaids obviously wear dresses, in this situation I'd probably say to her a pant suit would be fine if that's what she's most comfortable in.

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• emmyg65 member

  

  June 2014

  ^ This.

  
  

  Just tell her you'd like her to wear something navy.

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• lilacck28 member

  

  June 2014 edited June 2014

  Yeah. Leave it up to her. Its going to be hard enough for her to figure it out dealing with a major body change without the pressure of someone sending clothing "suggestions." I'm sure you would mean them kindly, but they do add pressure whether or not that was your intention. If she ASKS for suggestions: 

  
  

  My mom had a double mastectomy and reconstructive surgery. Instead of bras, she had to wear camisoles for a long time (per the doctor, for comfort and not damaging the work that was done.) She didn't really go out much during her healing time, but when she did, she preferred loose fitting clothes. Again, for comfort, but also because she felt a bit exposed wearing just a camisole. After a year though, she was fine with wearing whatever again. She was inwardly self conscious, because she missed her "working breasts" (her words), but her style really didn't change much. Don't assume your sister will be self conscious, or about what areas she will be self conscious.

  
  

   If she asks, I personally love boat neck dresses for all ages.  Maybe find some links of those, but wait until she asks for suggestions to send them to her. 

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• MairePoppy mod

  

  June 2014 edited June 2014

  My friend had a double mastectomy and several follow up surgeries for reconstruction and infections. She prefers soft, loose fitting knits because her implants are hot and cause her to sweat in the breast area. She also has discomfort in the under arm area, so nothing restrictive there. 

  
  

  This is a style my friend prefers, in a soft jersey knit. I would tell your sister to find something comfortable, in navy, and not worry about the color matching the bms exactly. @CMGRagain may may have some suggestions.
  

  
  

  
  

                     

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• lilacck28 member

  

  June 2014 edited June 2014

  Yeah, the under arm lymph nodes get REALLY screwy and painful. It took a very long time for my mom to be able to lift her arm properly. We have a ton of tiny 1-5 pound weights around the house that she used to get her muscles back into shape. 

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• BMoreBride6 member

  

  June 2014

  I also think you should leave this one 100% up to her and assure her that she will look beautiful in anything she is comfortable in.  One of my good friends went through the same thing and reconstruction is no joke.  She had a lot of lingering pain as many have stated above and had a lot of tactile issues in that area for a long time (she was super sensitive to lots of traditional "fancy" fabrics as they would feel very hot, itchy, constricting, etc.).  Also, one of my bridesmaids was in the middle of her 5th year of chemo and she had a port scar.  She ended up liking halter styles the best.  Again, I'd leave this one totally up to her. 
  

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