Organizing Escort Cards, Help Please!

starkas23 · July 2014

Hi! So we are down to 20 days before the big day and I am trying to figure out how to organize the escort cards. We will be listing our guests alphabetically by last name but that is where my confusion starts. I have some families whose spouses and children have different last names. Do they go under their own last name or are they put under the original invitee's last name? What about guests' bringing their significant other with a different last name or no last name provided?

Also, we have two unknown "guests". We have been trying to find out their names through all means but have been unable to do so. Do they get an escort card that says "Guy Lastname's Guest" or is it better to not give them one at all? I do not want to be rude to them, but we live internationally and had even the hardest time finding an address to send to these 2 family members.

We are using luggage tags placed inside an old luggage and using mini signs with letters for the alphabetical order, not sure if this changes anything since it isn't cards laid out side by side on a table.

BMoreBride6 · July 2014

starkas23 said:

Hi! So we are down to 20 days before the big day and I am trying to figure out how to organize the escort cards. We will be listing our guests alphabetically by last name but that is where my confusion starts. I have some families whose spouses and children have different last names. Do they go under their own last name or are they put under the original invitee's last name? What about guests' bringing their significant other with a different last name or no last name provided?

Also, we have two unknown "guests". We have been trying to find out their names through all means but have been unable to do so. Do they get an escort card that says "Guy Lastname's Guest" or is it better to not give them one at all? I do not want to be rude to them, but we live internationally and had even the hardest time finding an address to send to these 2 family members.

We are using luggage tags placed inside an old luggage and using mini signs with letters for the alphabetical order, not sure if this changes anything since it isn't cards laid out side by side on a table.

Sorry I'm a little bit confused, are they all just laying in a pile in the luggage?

ahyatt87 · July 2014

I have a different last name from DH, as I chose to keep my maiden name. I would expect to find my escort card under my last name, not my husband's. People expect to search for their own name, so I would not go about putting them under different people. That would just be confusing IMHO.

offensivekitten2 · July 2014

Make everyone's life easier and just stick to alphabetical order.

starkas23 · July 2014

Thank you, that's what I figured since they chose to keep their name but wasn't too sure about what to do about the kids. I'll keep everyone with their own name in alphabetical order.

And I'm not very good at explaining, sorry! This is a very rough picture of me trying different lettering for the sign. But the luggage tags will be laid out as pictured, and separated by last name alphabetically. The guests' names will be written on the little paper tag with the airplane and their table name/number will be found on the actual luggage tag.

saacjw · July 2014

ahyatt87 said:

I have a different last name from DH, as I chose to keep my maiden name. I would expect to find my escort card under my last name, not my husband's. People expect to search for their own name, so I would not go about putting them under different people. That would just be confusing IMHO.

I want to emphasize this and agree. I also chose to keep my maiden name, but have been to a few weddings where the couple has chosen to ignore that fact and it is really rude.

Most recently it was at a wedding where the bride contacted me for our new address, and since I knew some people assume I changed my name, I said My firstname lastname and Husband firstname lastname at our address. The invitation was addressed to Mr and Mrs Husband's Name. I sent back the RSVP as My firstname lastname and Husband firstname lastname and the place card was written as Mr and Mrs Husband's name. It's just so disrespectful and can't be taken as a mistake, so I'm really glad you're being so aware and polite about it!

Conversely, I've been to many other weddings where my name was right and the place cards were combined (by families), so my husband and I just knew to look for a card that said either my name and his name or his name and my name.

mysticl · July 2014

starkas23 said:

Hi! So we are down to 20 days before the big day and I am trying to figure out how to organize the escort cards. We will be listing our guests alphabetically by last name but that is where my confusion starts. I have some families whose spouses and children have different last names. Do they go under their own last name or are they put under the original invitee's last name? What about guests' bringing their significant other with a different last name or no last name provided?

Also, we have two unknown "guests". We have been trying to find out their names through all means but have been unable to do so. Do they get an escort card that says "Guy Lastname's Guest" or is it better to not give them one at all? I do not want to be rude to them, but we live internationally and had even the hardest time finding an address to send to these 2 family members.

We are using luggage tags placed inside an old luggage and using mini signs with letters for the alphabetical order, not sure if this changes anything since it isn't cards laid out side by side on a table.

Not giving them an escort card makes it look like they don't have a seat. If you absolutely cannot find out their name I would go with "Guest of Mr. Lastname" and put it with his escort card so they will see it.

melbenso · July 2014

I agree with PP. I also didn't take DH's last name and would be annoyed if someone knew my last name (would put on RSVP) and listed me under his. If escort cards were for couples, I would expect the card to list Melbenso Mylastname and DH Hislastname and would look for it under either one of our last names alphabetically.

Also, regarding unknown guest names, call or email the known guests and ask who they are bringing, so you can make an escort card with the guest's actual name: "Hi, Guest, I was wondering who you are bringing to the wedding. I'm working on seating for the reception and I would like to make sure his/her name is on an escort card." It's pretty unlikely that that three weeks out, they don't know who their date will be. If they still don't know, and still plan to bring someone, see PP suggestions re: name on escort card.

Edit: spelling

ashleyep · July 2014

ahyatt87 said:

I have a different last name from DH, as I chose to keep my maiden name. I would expect to find my escort card under my last name, not my husband's. People expect to search for their own name, so I would not go about putting them under different people. That would just be confusing IMHO.

So you expect your own escort card?

I did one escort card per couple whether married or not.

I don't know, and my mom won't find out the name of one of my grandparent's friend's guest. I ended up just putting Mr. His Name and Guest. I didn't know what to do.

[Deleted User] · July 2014

My sister's wedding was average to small in size. She also had luggage tags as escort cards. She actually connected the tags to one another for the couples or families. It probably took a bit of looking for personal tags anyway since a full third of the guest list had the bride's last name and several other groups of people shared last names. Pretty sure everyone found their tables without much issue.

ahyatt87 · July 2014

ashleyep said:

ahyatt87 said:

I have a different last name from DH, as I chose to keep my maiden name. I would expect to find my escort card under my last name, not my husband's. People expect to search for their own name, so I would not go about putting them under different people. That would just be confusing IMHO.

So you expect your own escort card?

I did one escort card per couple whether married or not.

I don't know, and my mom won't find out the name of one of my grandparent's friend's guest. I ended up just putting Mr. His Name and Guest. I didn't know what to do.

At all the weddings I've been to I've always had my own escort card. It didn't occur to me format them by couple. That is interesting! Did you write them out like you did your wedding invitations Mr and Mrs Smith or Mr Smith and Mrs Johnson? It wouldn't offend me if I was still properly addressed in my name, like I said, I have just never it saw it done like this before. Maybe it is because most of time DH and I choose different meal options and the escort cards have been used to indicate the meal choice as well. I'm just curious, how does that work then for meal options?

Cookie Pusher · July 2014

Every wedding I've been to, when I was invited with a date/SO/FI/H, we were listed on the same escort card.

gothic_fairy60 · July 2014

I plan to address mine and Mr. & Mrs. HisFirst HisLast for married couples (all of them verified sharing last name)

For couples not married each will get their own escort card (or not sharing last name if that was the case)

For married and bringing kids Mr. & Mrs. HisFirst HisLast and Family (FI and I have large families, so the same that name comes up several times). Too many family units share the same last name to fit at one table. Thought putting first names would clear it up.

starkas23 · July 2014

I will be doing one per guest as the escort cards double as favors.

We do not have phone numbers or email addresses for those 2 guests. They are FI's uncles who like to fall off the face the of the earth at random times and my MIL somehow found 2 addresses. We could send them snail mail to ask but international mail would take too long to arrive and then receive a response.

I think I will go with @mystic suggestion of labeling the cards or join the two tags as @adk19 sister did. I hadn't thought of joining them. Sounds cute! Thanks everyone!

ETA: I had paragraphs I swear

ashleyep · August 2014

ahyatt87 said:

ashleyep said:

ahyatt87 said:

I have a different last name from DH, as I chose to keep my maiden name. I would expect to find my escort card under my last name, not my husband's. People expect to search for their own name, so I would not go about putting them under different people. That would just be confusing IMHO.

So you expect your own escort card?

I did one escort card per couple whether married or not.

I don't know, and my mom won't find out the name of one of my grandparent's friend's guest. I ended up just putting Mr. His Name and Guest. I didn't know what to do.

At all the weddings I've been to I've always had my own escort card. It didn't occur to me format them by couple. That is interesting! Did you write them out like you did your wedding invitations Mr and Mrs Smith or Mr Smith and Mrs Johnson? It wouldn't offend me if I was still properly addressed in my name, like I said, I have just never it saw it done like this before. Maybe it is because most of time DH and I choose different meal options and the escort cards have been used to indicate the meal choice as well. I'm just curious, how does that work then for meal options?

This is a very late response, but I did basically what I did on the invites - Mr. and Mrs. His Name for the older couples, Mr. and Mrs. His and Her Name for the younger, and couples that had different last names (married or not) went on two lines. The Mr. and Mrs. wrapped on to two lines as well.

Kids got their own card.

I stuck two stickers on the escort card for meal choices - in most cases, they didn't follow the instructions of initializing entree choice on the RSVP card anyway so I didn't know who got what. I figured they could figure that out between themselves.

Organizing Escort Cards, Help Please!

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