You know, I think we have all met someone like this. They are so insidious, aren't they? I believe they are called narcissists. They are just completely unaware that other people have feelings....
You're busy between now and eternity when it comes to these people. Never, ever give them the time of day.
Also, this woman seems really far up her own ass and it sounds like the Groom couldn't even stand up to her.
I'm so sorry your FI feels this way, but that dinner was very valuable because you got your answer. Your lives will be richer without them.
I'm so sorry for your and your FI! These people are ridiculous! I hope that FI makes it clear to Jack why he's cutting off the friendship (and if Jack still intends to be BM, it's going to come up again). I hate it when people to do atrocious things like this and are completely unaware of how much they've fucked up.
Seriously though; I hope the two of you aren't too upset.
Forgive me I'm on mobile. Okay so after we left we received a string of text messages. One said we were very rude and inconsiderate that left them at dinner with the whole bill. That's just bull, since we paid for our meals plus the tip. Then one mentioned how we should understand since we are getting married and it would've be OUR day. We should be bappy at their wedding instead of "hating on them".
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
Forgive me I'm on mobile. Okay so after we left we received a string of text messages. One said we were very rude and inconsiderate that left them at dinner with the whole bill. That's just bull, since we paid for our meals plus the tip. Then one mentioned how we should understand since we are getting married and it would've be OUR day. We should be bappy at their wedding instead of "hating on them".
So much GIRL BYE to these people. GIRL BYE. SO MUCH.
Forgive me I'm on mobile. Okay so after we left we received a string of text messages. One said we were very rude and inconsiderate that left them at dinner with the whole bill. That's just bull, since we paid for our meals plus the tip. Then one mentioned how we should understand since we are getting married and it would've be OUR day. We should be bappy at their wedding instead of "hating on them".
Don't even dignify this with a response! That is so ridiculous and as someone else said- narcissistic. How far off is your wedding? Have you already sent out STD/Invitations? I think it is pretty clear that this guy is not a friend and therefor has no place being your Best Man.
I wouldn't even reply to any of these texts. At this point, even if they apologized I wouldn't respond. They've made some friendship ending moves and they are going to have to deal with the consquences.
The mentioned the bill thing twice? That's absolutely insane! Thats ridiculous to not notice you two paid your portion, or wait, did they expect you to pay the whole bill? Geez.
Forgive me I'm on mobile. Okay so after we left we received a string of text messages. One said we were very rude and inconsiderate that left them at dinner with the whole bill. That's just bull, since we paid for our meals plus the tip. Then one mentioned how we should understand since we are getting married and it would've be OUR day. We should be bappy at their wedding instead of "hating on them".
Don't even dignify this with a response! That is so ridiculous and as someone else said- narcissistic. How far off is your wedding? Have you already sent out STD/Invitations? I think it is pretty clear that this guy is not a friend and therefor has no place being your Best Man.
We had to move our wedding back due to fmil being sick and the troubles his family was having back in Japan. We did send out information to all in invitees letting them know in advanced. We did sent std to guests but we want to reconsider them in our wedding.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
Their thing about the bill is making me wonder if the server pocketed the money you gave him, and still billed them for the whole thing. Do you think that's possible? Aside from that, these people seem crazypants and you are probably better off without them. Even more crazypants if they are lying about the bill, as it appears they are.
Ditto gmcr78. I would probably respond to the sticking them with the bill complaint. Maybe the waiter did pocket the money or applied your money to the wrong check. If you are ready to end the friendship, just do that, them being in your wedding will fall by the wayside when you end the friendship.
"Jack, I don't know why you keep mentioning that I stuck you with a dinner bill. We paid the waiter directly our portion of the bill. If he did not credit the bill, go see the restaurant. Please stop contacting me. I have decided to re-evaluate our friendship and I realize that we are different people than from when the friendship started. I wish you nothing but the best in the future."
Their thing about the bill is making me wonder if the server pocketed the money you gave him, and still billed them for the whole thing. Do you think that's possible? Aside from that, these people seem crazypants and you are probably better off without them. Even more crazypants if they are lying about the bill, as it appears they are.
We have a receipt and a copy that we signed while we were on the way out (The Point of Sale computer is located by the wine rack that is on display). When we were walking out our Server was by the POS and we told him can we pay for our meals right now because we need to leave. So I they may feel like we didn't pay at first and then they got their bill for their bottle of Moet(they brought to toast and it had a 25.00 uncorking fee) and their meals. I guess they expected us to pay for their meal at least that is what FI thinks. We didn't drink the champange because we left before they were about open it.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
Forgive me I'm on mobile. Okay so after we left we received a string of text messages. One said we were very rude and inconsiderate that left them at dinner with the whole bill. That's just bull, since we paid for our meals plus the tip. Then one mentioned how we should understand since we are getting married and it would've be OUR day. We should be bappy at their wedding instead of "hating on them".
Don't even dignify this with a response! That is so ridiculous and as someone else said- narcissistic. How far off is your wedding? Have you already sent out STD/Invitations? I think it is pretty clear that this guy is not a friend and therefor has no place being your Best Man.
We had to move our wedding back due to fmil being sick and the troubles his family was having back in Japan. We did send out information to all in invitees letting them know in advanced. We did sent std to guests but we want to reconsider them in our wedding.
You're a saint for "reconsidering." I would consider them just plain Dead To Me.
Is it possible they think they were doing a huge favor by having dinner and celebrating with a bottle of champagne they brought? They possibly don't see what they did and just see that you didn't give a gift-- not that anyone ever has to give a gift, left early and didn't even offer to split the wine uncorking? They are for sure crazy and incredibly rude, just trying to figure out why they think their behavior is acceptable for grown adults (for anyone).
The mentioned the bill thing twice? That's absolutely insane! Thats ridiculous to not notice you two paid your portion, or wait, did they expect you to pay the whole bill? Geez.
I think they wanted us to pay for dinner. They chose the restaurant, which was very pricey. They invited us to dinner. SO I do not get Jack and Jill's problem. Also I can update you more:
He left a voice mail saying he hope their marriage doesn't cause problems with their friendships. He is still his bestfriend and sorry that everything turned out, wasn't trying to offend anybody. They wanted a private wedding and to keep it small.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
The mentioned the bill thing twice? That's absolutely insane! Thats ridiculous to not notice you two paid your portion, or wait, did they expect you to pay the whole bill? Geez.
I think they wanted us to pay for dinner. They chose the restaurant, which was very pricey. They invited us to dinner. SO I do not get Jack and Jill's problem. Also I can update you more:
He left a voice mail saying he hope their marriage doesn't cause problems with their friendships. He is still his bestfriend and sorry that everything turned out, wasn't trying to offend anybody. They wanted a private wedding and to keep it small.
Hmm... Sounds like someone told them what asses they're being.
The mentioned the bill thing twice? That's absolutely insane! Thats ridiculous to not notice you two paid your portion, or wait, did they expect you to pay the whole bill? Geez.
I think they wanted us to pay for dinner. They chose the restaurant, which was very pricey. They invited us to dinner. SO I do not get Jack and Jill's problem. Also I can update you more:
He left a voice mail saying he hope their marriage doesn't cause problems with their friendships. He is still his bestfriend and sorry that everything turned out, wasn't trying to offend anybody. They wanted a private wedding and to keep it small.
And it would have been so difficult to call up his best friend and explain that prior to posting wedding pics on FB? If they wanted a small, private wedding how does he account for the bride's friends being there?
AlexisA01 said:
BrandNewJ said:
The mentioned the bill thing twice? That's absolutely insane! Thats ridiculous to not notice you two paid your portion, or wait, did they expect you to pay the whole bill? Geez.
I think they wanted us to pay for dinner. They chose the restaurant, which was very pricey. They invited us to dinner. SO I do not get Jack and Jill's problem. Also I can update you more: He left a voice mail saying he hope their marriage doesn't cause problems with their friendships. He is still his bestfriend and sorry that everything turned out, wasn't trying to offend anybody. They wanted a private wedding and to keep it small.
That is just such bullshit. Their marriage isn't the problem. The problem is the way they treated all of their loved ones. If they didn't want a huge wedding then they shouldn't have planned one and sent out STDS, asked people to be in their wedding, and then done a complete 180 without notifying anyone or apologizing.
Him saying that he hopes their marriage doesn't cause problems makes it crystal clear these people have no idea how rude they've been.
Forgive me I'm on mobile. Okay so after we left we received a string of text messages. One said we were very rude and inconsiderate that left them at dinner with the whole bill. That's just bull, since we paid for our meals plus the tip. Then one mentioned how we should understand since we are getting married and it would've be OUR day. We should be bappy at their wedding instead of "hating on them".
Don't even dignify this with a response! That is so ridiculous and as someone else said- narcissistic. How far off is your wedding? Have you already sent out STD/Invitations? I think it is pretty clear that this guy is not a friend and therefor has no place being your Best Man.
We had to move our wedding back due to fmil being sick and the troubles his family was having back in Japan. We did send out information to all in invitees letting them know in advanced. We did sent std to guests but we want to reconsider them in our wedding.
You're a saint for "reconsidering." I would consider them just plain Dead To Me.
I mean it as My FI is reconsidering of him as best man. He will not replace anybody as BM and his groomsmen are like just invite them to be a guest, instead of the title as best man since he ruined the friendship. We are trying to be as pleasant as possible without looking a like an asswipe.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
I didn't think anything on here could surprise me anymore but these people did. I can't believe the gall that these people have. They were rude, they need to own it.
Forgive me I'm on mobile. Okay so after we left we received a string of text messages. One said we were very rude and inconsiderate that left them at dinner with the whole bill. That's just bull, since we paid for our meals plus the tip. Then one mentioned how we should understand since we are getting married and it would've be OUR day. We should be bappy at their wedding instead of "hating on them".
Don't even dignify this with a response! That is so ridiculous and as someone else said- narcissistic. How far off is your wedding? Have you already sent out STD/Invitations? I think it is pretty clear that this guy is not a friend and therefor has no place being your Best Man.
We had to move our wedding back due to fmil being sick and the troubles his family was having back in Japan. We did send out information to all in invitees letting them know in advanced. We did sent std to guests but we want to reconsider them in our wedding.
You're a saint for "reconsidering." I would consider them just plain Dead To Me.
I mean it as My FI is reconsidering of him as best man. He will not replace anybody as BM and his groomsmen are like just invite them to be a guest, instead of the title as best man since he ruined the friendship. We are trying to be as pleasant as possible without looking a like an asswipe.
I don't think it's possible for you and your FI to look like an asswipe in this situation.
Forgive me I'm on mobile. Okay so after we left we received a string of text messages. One said we were very rude and inconsiderate that left them at dinner with the whole bill. That's just bull, since we paid for our meals plus the tip. Then one mentioned how we should understand since we are getting married and it would've be OUR day. We should be bappy at their wedding instead of "hating on them".
Don't even dignify this with a response! That is so ridiculous and as someone else said- narcissistic. How far off is your wedding? Have you already sent out STD/Invitations? I think it is pretty clear that this guy is not a friend and therefor has no place being your Best Man.
We had to move our wedding back due to fmil being sick and the troubles his family was having back in Japan. We did send out information to all in invitees letting them know in advanced. We did sent std to guests but we want to reconsider them in our wedding.
You're a saint for "reconsidering." I would consider them just plain Dead To Me.
I mean it as My FI is reconsidering of him as best man. He will not replace anybody as BM and his groomsmen are like just invite them to be a guest, instead of the title as best man since he ruined the friendship. We are trying to be as pleasant as possible without looking a like an asswipe.
I don't think it's possible for you and your FI to look like an asswipe in this situation.
Don't worry about how you look. They will say what ever they want to say and you can't control that. All you can do is follow etiquette and ignore them. Even if people believe them at first, they'll eventually realize you guys were in the right as the couple continues to be rude. Just focus on being the bigger people here and remember:
When is your wedding scheduled? If you have time before invites go out, I would definitely let this marinate before doing anything. It never hurts to sleep on a decision, regardless of how obvious it may seem at the time.
About the post-dinner Facebook message - did they send this privately or did they actually post it on your wall? (Not that it makes any difference regarding how douchey their behaviour was, though.)
I just caught up on this and wow. These people sound terrible. Yeah if I were your FI I wouldn't have him as the best man anymore. Fuck they wouldn't even be invited to the wedding.
Honestly, while they sound really selfish and shitty, I'd talk to the husband if I was your FI. If you're close enough that this dude was your best man them I think he at least deserves to hear your end of things.
Re: We walked out
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
I'm the fuck out.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
Aside from that, these people seem crazypants and you are probably better off without them. Even more crazypants if they are lying about the bill, as it appears they are.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
That is just such bullshit. Their marriage isn't the problem. The problem is the way they treated all of their loved ones. If they didn't want a huge wedding then they shouldn't have planned one and sent out STDS, asked people to be in their wedding, and then done a complete 180 without notifying anyone or apologizing.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
I didn't think anything on here could surprise me anymore but these people did. I can't believe the gall that these people have. They were rude, they need to own it.
Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.
Ugh.