wedding from hell

mschristie123 · August 2014

I am so annoyed with DH's friend. This guy is one of DH's best friends. He's getting married next weekend, and we're very happy for him... except that literally everything about his wedding sucks.

He and his FI are very over the top people. First- they made it clear early on what OTT trips they wanted for their bachelor/bachelorette party. Obviously, DH could have declined, but he felt obligated to his friend to show him a good time for his Bach party. Their honeyfund is super important to them. Is has little tidbits about all their "experiences." It says cute things like, "For $2,000- Please help us sit first class on our way to the Caribbean!! No one wants to be cranky in coach!" Whatever. We're getting a you a check. Blegh..... So much blegh.

When we got our invitation, guess what was the top insert, front and center when you open up the invitation??-- you guessed it! Registry card with honeyfund information! What sweethearts. They knew that their honeyfund website address would be more important to me than knowing WHEN and WHERE their fucking wedding is. Oh and "formal attire" requested.

Final straw is that today DH received an email with a list of stipulations regarding the limo bus taking pictures before the ceremony. I was going to go with them until I learned no beverages are allowed on the bus, and dates are not allowed to leave the bus for the whole 3 hours.

Seriously. What. the. Fuck.

Edited to take out some specifics about the couple

mysticl · August 2014

I suggest a flask.

mysticl · August 2014

I guess the no drinks on the bus will help with the no bathroom breaks though.

JCbride2015 · August 2014

Well, at least they're keeping your best interests at heart by not allowing drinks if you've got to go three+ hours with no bathroom break.

hikebikebemerry · August 2014

Can this fit under your dress?

sarawifenow · August 2014

Oh hell no! They would get nothing from me.

daria24 · August 2014

This bride is in for a rude awakening. Staying hydrated is the friggin key to getting through your wedding day. I hope she enjoys fainting at the altar.

THREE HOURS of photos? How many Pinterest must haves are they going to do?!?!

JCbride2015 · August 2014

mysticl said:

I guess the no drinks on the bus will help with the no bathroom breaks though.

Great minds!

CMGragain · August 2014

mschristie123 said:

I am so annoyed with DH's friend. This guy was a groomsmen in our wedding and one of DH's best friends from college. He's getting married next weekend, and we're very happy for him... except that literally everything about his wedding sucks.

He and his FI are very snobby, pretentious people. First- they made it clear early on what trips (New Orleans-her and Vegas-him) they wanted their bridal parties to throw for their bachelor/bachelorette party (Thursday--Sunday extravaganzas with no regard paid to people's salaries). Obviously, DH could have declined, but he felt obligated to his friend to show him a good time in Vegas.

They have pimped their honeyfund to anyone that listen, whining on and on about how they just don't need anything except a nice vacation. So about the honeyfund, I've never seen any other ones, and I'm not sure if this is normal, but they have a little blurb about each "experience" along with a total price for each thing they want you to chip in for. Things like, "For $2,000- Please help us sit first class on our way to Fiji!! No one want's "Jane" being a cranky pants on the airplane!" "For $1,000- Help us upgrade to a private villa. So romantic for our special trip!" Whatever. We're getting a you a check. Blegh..... So much blegh.

Invitations went out about a month ago, and guest what was the top insert, front and center when you open up the invitation??-- you guessed it! Registry card with honeyfund information! What sweethearts. They knew that their honeyfund website address would be more important to me than knowing WHEN and WHERE their fucking wedding is. Oh and "formal attire" requested.
guest what was the top insert, front and center when you open up the invitation??-- you guessed it! Registry card with honeyfund information!
Final straw is that today DH received an email from this guy with the following stipulations regarding the limo bus taking pictures before the ceremony. I was initially planning on accompanying him around town for the pictures until this.
- Dates are allowed to accompany the bridal party but all dates MUST stay on the bus at all times.
- Dates must get to the church by 1pm or will be left at the church.
- No drinks (water or otherwise) are permitted on the bus.
- There is STRICT 3 hours time frame for pictures, so we're very sorry, bathroom breaks are not permitted. Please keep that in mind.

Just seriously. What. the. Fuck.

There have been two posts in the past 24 hours from speshul snowflake brides who are furious that we all told them that honeyfunds are RUDE!

holyguacamole79 · August 2014

StitelME · August 2014

This is ridiculous. It sounds like these people have a serious case of wedding blinders -> they don't see that, while this day is important for them and about them, they are still supposed to think of the guests too! My bachelorette is at VA Beach (not the nicest beach around but I went to high school there) and we are staying at my mom's house to save some money for everyone instead of splurging on a hotel in prime beach season. Demanding the things they are demanding is soo inconsiderate and out-of-touch.

manateehugger · August 2014

thisismynickname2 · August 2014

Helllllllllllll no.

I don't know a single person besides maybe a parent of a bride or groom that would give $1,000 as a gift, let alone $2,000. (Not even $500!) If you can't afford Fiji out of your own salary, you don't get to go to fucking Fiji.

StitelME · August 2014

And can we discuss the icky captions they posted for each of the items they requested as a gift? Seriously?

wandajune6 · August 2014

Why are you friends again?

I'd want nothing to do with this.

buttercup1958 · August 2014

StitelME said:

This is ridiculous. It sounds like these people have a serious case of wedding blinders -> they don't see that, while this day is important for them and about them, they are still supposed to think of the guests too! My bachelorette is at VA Beach (not the nicest beach around but I went to high school there) and we are staying at my mom's house to save some money for everyone instead of splurging on a hotel in prime beach season. Demanding the things they are demanding is soo inconsiderate and out-of-touch.

Really? What high school? I went to kellam!

StitelME · August 2014

buttercup1958 said:

StitelME said:

This is ridiculous. It sounds like these people have a serious case of wedding blinders -> they don't see that, while this day is important for them and about them, they are still supposed to think of the guests too! My bachelorette is at VA Beach (not the nicest beach around but I went to high school there) and we are staying at my mom's house to save some money for everyone instead of splurging on a hotel in prime beach season. Demanding the things they are demanding is soo inconsiderate and out-of-touch.

Really? What high school? I went to kellam!

Cox ... LOL. small world.

mysticl · August 2014

StitelME said:

buttercup1958 said:

StitelME said:

This is ridiculous. It sounds like these people have a serious case of wedding blinders -> they don't see that, while this day is important for them and about them, they are still supposed to think of the guests too! My bachelorette is at VA Beach (not the nicest beach around but I went to high school there) and we are staying at my mom's house to save some money for everyone instead of splurging on a hotel in prime beach season. Demanding the things they are demanding is soo inconsiderate and out-of-touch.

Really? What high school? I went to kellam!

Cox ... LOL. small world.

I just moved back to VB a couple of weeks ago.

buttercup1958 · August 2014

StitelME said:

buttercup1958 said:

StitelME said:

This is ridiculous. It sounds like these people have a serious case of wedding blinders -> they don't see that, while this day is important for them and about them, they are still supposed to think of the guests too! My bachelorette is at VA Beach (not the nicest beach around but I went to high school there) and we are staying at my mom's house to save some money for everyone instead of splurging on a hotel in prime beach season. Demanding the things they are demanding is soo inconsiderate and out-of-touch.

Really? What high school? I went to kellam!

Cox ... LOL. small world.

Ha it is! Btw have you heard of the new kellam that was built? That thing is crazy, it's almost like a community college. I didn't enjoy kellam that much when I went.

StitelME · August 2014

@buttercup1958 , No i haven't. My little sisters just graduated from Cox recently but other than that I haven't been paying much attention to the area beyond making sure the bad storms didn't affect my family.

sarahufl · August 2014

Nope. Nope. Nope. Not enough nopes.

buttercup1958 · August 2014

StitelME yeah my family still lives around there so they keep me informed. It has 2 football fields, three stories, solar panels, a courtyard with recyclable rain water, ect. Basically the exact opposite of the old school.

KatieinBkln · August 2014

These people suck, and you should give them near-empty gift cards to stores that aren't in their area.

StitelME · August 2014

sarahufl said:

Nope. Nope. Nope. Not enough nopes.

WinstonsGirl · August 2014

I'm impressed that you're still giving them a cheque.

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 · August 2014

"For $2,000- Please help us sit first class on our way to Fiji!! No one want's "Jane" being a cranky pants on the airplane!"

Oh, honey, ball gags are waaaaaay cheaper than that.

beethery · August 2014

mysticl said:

I suggest a flask.

THREE HOUR PHOTO THING????

Oh holy lord, you're going to need more than that. My bestie's boyfriend has dubious taste in friends, and they treat my bestie like shit. BF has all of the shitty friends over for July 4th every year. Here's how I dealt with it last year:

(Links to follow)

Get a hydration backpack. (Like a camelbak) Or just a regular backpack that has a laptop sleeve built in. Get a hydration reservoir too. Then get two REALLY BIG cold packs. I like the ginormous PEAS ones that you can get at CVS. They hold a shape better than the liquid gel ones. Make sure you have iced tea or cokes cold and ready. Maybe put a bottle of rum or vodka in the fridge overnight too.

The night before this shitshow, put the cold packs in the freezer, and fill the hydration pack with a simple mixed drink. Booze + soda or whatever.

Bring that motherfucker with you and you'll be in good shape.

mschristie123 · August 2014

beethery said:

mysticl said:

I suggest a flask.

THREE HOUR PHOTO THING????

Oh holy lord, you're going to need more than that. My bestie's boyfriend has dubious taste in friends, and they treat my bestie like shit. BF has all of the shitty friends over for July 4th every year. Here's how I dealt with it last year:

(Links to follow)

Get a hydration backpack. (Like a camelbak) Or just a regular backpack that has a laptop sleeve built in. Get a hydration reservoir too. Then get two REALLY BIG cold packs. I like the ginormous PEAS ones that you can get at CVS. They hold a shape better than the liquid gel ones. Make sure you have iced tea or cokes cold and ready. Maybe put a bottle of rum or vodka in the fridge overnight too.

The night before this shitshow, put the cold packs in the freezer, and fill the hydration pack with a simple mixed drink. Booze + soda or whatever.

Bring that motherfucker with you and you'll be in good shape.

Psssh I'm not fucking going to this thing. I'm gonna let DH handle that. Me and two other wives of the groomsmen bailed on the 3 hour photo tour after that bullshit email. One of them is pregnant and her and her H were pretty pissed about the strict bathroom break rule.

Oh and I almost forgot! Best (worst?) part from the email:

"Now, once we get to the church, we'll be escorted to our section to cool down, get ready again (gotta look fresh) and then we'll have the ceremony. Dates aren't allowed to come with us so they will need to go around to Starbucks or somewhere else nearby to wait until 4:30 or so when guests can come into the church for the ceremony."

smalfrie19 · August 2014

i seriously cant get past "dates"...from what you are saying, most of you are SPOUSES!

mschristie123 · August 2014

thisismynickname said:

Helllllllllllll no.
I don't know a single person besides maybe a parent of a bride or groom that would give $1,000 as a gift, let alone $2,000. (Not even $500!) If you can't afford Fiji out of your own salary, you don't get to go to fucking Fiji.

Well I think the point is that you can chip in whatever you want to go towards that experience. I was just blow away by how tacky it was to put the prices for each experience on there! Like I said, I don't know if this is normal, but it didn't take DH's friends too long to add up how much their honeymoon would be..... Somewhere in the ballpark of $30,000. Funded by their friends.

beethery · August 2014

What a MESS.

wedding from hell

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