I need to vent about my FMIL.

jdluvr06 · August 2014

I seriously love all of FI's family (there are only four of them including FI so not much room for a crazy relative in there). FI jokes that FMIL loves me more than him. They even get along with my family. Like my FILs come to my family's holiday things (my aunt's idea) and they just melded right in. It is like they were always part of the family. FI and I are so incredibly lucky when it comes to our relatives that it is a little scary. We are waiting for the other shoe to drop. Lmao.

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 · August 2014

My FMIL is 50 and insists on talking like a stuck up teenager. I'll talk about something of interest ("We saw a Delorian on the way over here!" etc) and she'll go "Omg SHUT UP! You didn't!" I HATE when people say "SHUT Uuuuuuup!!" in response to something.

That and she loves saying "Livin' La Vida Loca" all the time: "See the new deck? I'm just Livin' La Vida Loca, now." "We're always up to somethingm Livin' La Vida Loca!!"

Bitch, Ricky Martin isn't even livin' la vida loca. GET OUT OF THE 90s!!!

I'm okay....I'm okay..

mysticl · August 2014

goldchocobo said:

My FMIL is 50 and insists on talking like a stuck up teenager. I'll talk about something of interest ("We saw a Delorian on the way over here!" etc) and she'll go "Omg SHUT UP! You didn't!" I HATE when people say "SHUT Uuuuuuup!!" in response to something.

That and she loves saying "Livin' La Vida Loca" all the time: "See the new deck? I'm just Livin' La Vida Loca, now." "We're always up to somethingm Livin' La Vida Loca!!"

Bitch, Ricky Martin isn't even livin' la vida loca. GET OUT OF THE 90s!!!

I'm okay....I'm okay..

My step-father's first wife is in her 70s. She tries to act like she's current. The teenagers will talk about video games and she'll pretend she knows what they are talking about. Or she'll throw out pop culture references only they just don't quite fit what we are talking about.

wandajune6 · August 2014

@DanikaMarie0227 - Thanks for the perspective check on that! FI's 2 (Mexican) brothers are married to (Puerto Rican) sisters who follow the same patterns so I sometimes can't tell where it's all coming from!

Peaseblossom55 · August 2014

I feel so blessed I love MIL, FIL, & SIL. H's entire family including his extended family has never been anything but loving and kind. I really feel so lucky. I have not a bad thing to say about any of them.

jdluvr06 · August 2014

Lol all the traditional gender role stories remind me of my great grandmother. When she found out I wasn't taking FI's last name and in fact that he is changing his to mine, she said "if I didn't think enough of a man to take his name I certainly wouldn't think enough of him to marry him,". Now before you guys jump all over my great grandma she followed that up by shaking her head saying "young people" and then offered me some cake. So it was all good.

banana468 · August 2014

I've had my issues with MIL but one of the biggest things she refuses to do is "fix a plate" for FIL. She grew up very old school Italian and hated the idea that the women didn't eat until they fixed their husbands a plate.

theexactlee · August 2014

So you are complaining that your FMIL takes an interest in your life? I realize it is a bit overbearing with her asking so many questions but it could be much worse. She could not like you at all and make your relationship impossible to deal with. It sounds like she likes you very much which is a blessing. As far as her touching you and invading your personal space that is tricky. You probably don't want to be confrontational and tell her to back her shit up. But you also don't want to be groomed like a monkey. Probably a polite but dramatically pointed "Oh, okay thank you I've got this." is in order.

theexactlee · August 2014

@goldchocobo I just laughed so loud my 6 year old is all like "What, what are you laughing about?" Living La Vida Loca!!! My MIL is wonderful. I mean obviously she gets on my nerves about things, she isn't my own mom. But she home schools my son, will babysit almost any time I need her and just in general is wonderful. But she does sometimes try to be "hip" and it makes me laugh. She's so not hip. But I think it's great that at 62 years old she tries. She's a music teacher so for example if we are at a place that has pop music playing or something like that and she hears it she'll start trying to dance like "the kids these days". I just shake my head and look at my husband. But I love her. She's mine.

steph861 · August 2014

@goldchocobo I could seriously listen to your FMIL stories all day. They're amazing.

climbingsingle · August 2014

You guys. She's on the phone with FI right now asking him if I'll have my period on the wedding day. And explaining to him how I can skip my period if I am. Lmao.

mysticl · August 2014

ClimbingBrideNY said:

You guys. She's on the phone with FI right now asking him if I'll have my period on the wedding day. And explaining to him how I can skip my period if I am. Lmao.

Um, yeah, I can't form a thought over that one.

hikebikebemerry · August 2014

I feel like I've said this before, but my FMIL is AWESOME.

I call her when I'm upset rather than my own mother. And she adores me. (Seriously, my BIL's parents are close with her, so I hear it through the grapevine.. and she tells me). I actually love all of FI's family.

However, she only has one volume- and it is LOUD. I come from a pretty loud family, so it takes a lot for me to notice that someone is loud. And when FI is around her, he gets really loud too.

steph861 · August 2014

ClimbingBrideNY said:

You guys. She's on the phone with FI right now asking him if I'll have my period on the wedding day. And explaining to him how I can skip my period if I am. Lmao.

I can't even.

theexactlee · August 2014

I retract every single thing I said. Get your climbing gear and get the hell outta dodge. You can try to take FI with you but at this point he may be collateral damage. Don't look back there are plenty of fish in the sea.

afox007 · August 2014

I may just strangle FMIL one day. She has zero filter and since I'm not the junkie ex wife I'm clearly an awful person. Some favorite gems from her:

I needed to dye my blonde hair it's natural color (dark brown) ASAP since she doesn't like blonds...I fucked with her and did almost an even split of dark with tons of highlights.

She told my BFF she was "a bad Jew" for eating shellfish when she came over for Christmas. I laughed so hard when my friend replied I'm here celebrating Christmas clearly I'm a bad Jew.

Recently she complained to me it wasn't fair I spend so much more time with FSS than she does; she is his family and I never will be so she should get priority.

She also lost her shit when she heard I had made bacon and eggs for breakfast for the boys before we went over to her house for Passover. It was bad enough not eating kosher but I should be ashamed since it was Passover. I just rolled my eyes and grabbed wine since no one there her included was actually Jewish, bacon is clearly a good group, and Passover wa technically the next week.

alpacalunch · August 2014

These stories are making me feel so blessed. I mean, FMIL is a wee bit crazypants, but she's very nice. And has told me several times I'm the prettiest girl her son ever brought home- "not like some of the trolls he's dated". So that made me feel good, and weird.
FFIL's brother, I may murder. We're very far apart on the political spectrum, but I keep my opinions to myself generally. However, when he originally found out I was from Toronto, he asked my opinion on Rob Ford (pre-crack). I told him I was not a fan, he went on a 15 minute tirade about how the 'liberal media is trying to bring a good man down'. Took all of my strength not to send him a link to a dozen articles when all the hilarious nastiness started coming to light.

Edit: TK, why you so paragraph hungry these days?

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 · August 2014

chrisandcait said:

These stories are making me feel so blessed. I mean, FMIL is a wee bit crazypants, but she's very nice. And has told me several times I'm the prettiest girl her son ever brought home- "not like some of the trolls he's dated". So that made me feel good, and weird.
FFIL's brother, I may murder. We're very far apart on the political spectrum, but I keep my opinions to myself generally. However, when he originally found out I was from Toronto, he asked my opinion on Rob Ford (pre-crack). I told him I was not a fan, he went on a 15 minute tirade about how the 'liberal media is trying to bring a good man down'. Took all of my strength not to send him a link to a dozen articles when all the hilarious nastiness started coming to light.

Edit: TK, why you so paragraph hungry these days?

****************************************************************************
Shit, and IM STUCK IN DA BOX!!!!

My FMIL hates Rob Ford but has no idea why. She just thinks he 'looks like a big fat sleaze bag." Ummmm, okay. Not valuable. FI cannot talk politics with her and avoids it at all costs. She didn't vote in the last election anyway, so it's not like she helped us all out any!

To the first bolded: Awwww, that's so cute!! Totally blush worthy (and points for her using the word troll)

This isn't about my mother in law, but my grandfather in law calls me sexist names when no one is listening and I can only blink and studder after the fact.. Because in his mind I look like a hooters girl (I prefer the term 'Budget Megan Fox' but to each their own) and so I get cute little convos like this:

"Wench, do you have a registry?"

"Huh? What? Uhhhh...yes.....(wench? WENCH????)"

beethery · August 2014

ClimbingBrideNY said:

You guys. She's on the phone with FI right now asking him if I'll have my period on the wedding day. And explaining to him how I can skip my period if I am. Lmao.

oh my fucking god

Chipmunk415 · August 2014

The ONE time we involved my SMIL in wedding planning, (dress shopping), she called my mom a bitch to her face and tried to act like she was joking. Never apologized to my mom or I after seeing the offended looks on our faces. Did act embarrassed in front of FIL a week later when DH brought it up (he witnessed it too) and told FIL what she'd said.

She's lucky she's still walking- you don't go at my mom like that and expect no consequences. But mom's opinion of her factors that incident in greatly.

Dh is now not talking with his folks over their botched handling of obtaining copies of BIL's autopsy report, the toxicology report, and investigation report. Long story short, bil took something he should not have, accidentally overdosed, and the medical examiner ruled it a suicide. SMIL has been pestering the hell out of the investigators (to the point they dont want to work with her) trying to get the classification of death changed to accident. BUT she doesnt have a single copy of any report to use in making her arguments.

She lost it when DH said he'd contacted the proper authorities about getting copies, saying "she's the MOTHER" (shes the stepmother who happened to adopt bil when he was a teenager, or so we were told) and DH has no right to any information pertaining to his little brother's death. At this rate, we won't know exactly what happened to bil without a court order for records.

Fil is standing by his wife- he's been content to let her be in contact with the investigators as its too painful for him to do it.

Yay for inlaw drama.

kmmssg · August 2014

Chipmunk415 said:

The ONE time we involved my SMIL in wedding planning, (dress shopping), she called my mom a bitch to her face and tried to act like she was joking. Never apologized to my mom or I after seeing the offended looks on our faces. Did act embarrassed in front of FIL a week later when DH brought it up (he witnessed it too) and told FIL what she'd said. She's lucky she's still walking- you don't go at my mom like that and expect no consequences. But mom's opinion of her factors that incident in greatly. Dh is now not talking with his folks over their botched handling of obtaining copies of BIL's autopsy report, the toxicology report, and investigation report. Long story short, bil took something he should not have, accidentally overdosed, and the medical examiner ruled it a suicide. SMIL has been pestering the hell out of the investigators (to the point they dont want to work with her) trying to get the classification of death changed to accident. BUT she doesnt have a single copy of any report to use in making her arguments. She lost it when DH said he'd contacted the proper authorities about getting copies, saying "she's the MOTHER" (shes the stepmother who happened to adopt bil when he was a teenager, or so we were told) and DH has no right to any information pertaining to his little brother's death. At this rate, we won't know exactly what happened to bil without a court order for records. Fil is standing by his wife- he's been content to let her be in contact with the investigators as its too painful for him to do it. Yay for inlaw drama.

You should go evil Chipmunk all over her. I will help you, no problem.

I have to say I had the 2 best MILs on the freaking planet. My first one was already ill when I met her. She had hardening of the arteries to the brain and it was kinda like pre-alzheimer's for a long time. She was the sweetest, kindest lady ever. Loved her to death and hated giving her up in the divorce but ex-h wouldn't let me have her (that is seriously a joke, but I did love the heck out of her).

My second MIL became my role model for how to be a MIL. She was a proper Catholic bride of the 50's, had 6 kids in under 7 years and was an elementary teacher. DH remembers the day his parents told all of them that if they chose to live with a SO outside of wedlock they would disown them.

20 some years later we were the only ones to live together outside of marriage and that woman was so kind, gracious, and loving towards me it wasn't funny. We were also the only ones to conceive a child out of wedlock. Not a peep, just tons of love and acceptance.

She never got in our business, never gave unsolicited advice, and was always great to have around. We had a deal that we wouldn't draw in each other's dust because neither of us were white glove type housekeepers.

I try really hard to zip my lip with the adult kids and follow their rules for their children. So far so good.... I had the best role models ever.

Kauris · August 2014

Honestly, I have to say I am very jealous of all of the FMIL stories, good or bad. I never got to meet FI's parents. His mom passed away two weeks before he started trying to get back together with me (at her prompting, so I'm thankful for her in my own way). His father passed away three weeks before we got engaged. They were living in Spain and we planned to make the trip, we didn't make it in time. So, maybe I'm a little bitter, no, actually, I'm a lot bitter.

I will never hear any stories of his childhood the way parents can tell it. I'll never know if they would have liked me or hated me. I guess I'm being an asshole, I'm done with my pity party, jerk face rant. Sorry. Who knows, it might make you a better MIL one day.

But yes, her asking about your cycle is way over the line.

itsrandiyo · August 2014

We're paying for our wedding and she has literally asked 4 separate times how much our food costs per plate.. Now a couple months later (closer to the wedding) she stopped asking that but she asked (NO JOKE); "so do you guys have to pay per plate?"

She just doesn't get stuff sometimes. Its frustrating. Also, shes like crazy about the guest list and thinks that its her wedding, I swear. For example, we don't have room for anymore people in the church (literally) and she was talking about how we should have invited HER cousins children and their children the other day. I MEAN COME ON....its not my Fiances cousins children its HERS.

climbingsingle · August 2014

My FMIL unfortunately doesn't really have boundaries. Her and FI have always had a very close relationship. FI tells her just about everything. And I get it because I am the same way with my mom. I tell her everything too. However, my period is definitely something I don't want to talk about with her. And shit, I'm 33 years old. I know all about my period. I've had it for 22 years and I've been on the pill for a very long time.

But regardless of all this, I still consider myself lucky to have the FMIL I do. She may annoy me sometimes, but she really is great to me and she loves me.

lovemyrunner · August 2014

Not my FMIL, but maybe someday. BF's mom has been super nice to me and is pretty funny. Sometimes, she's a little rigid about her standards of behavior, so I feel like I have to reign in my dirty jokes, but no big deal. The one thing she does that I hate is call BF out about money. For some reason, he allows her to have access to his checking account, so she's always checking his balance and calling him about certain charges. It's nice that she immediately catches things when charges are wrong, but she'll also make comments about what he chose to spend his money on. He's a grown man who is gainfully employed, so what he spends on is his business, not hers. She will also announce to him in front of others, that she feels he's spending too much or if his balance is low. This weekend she quoted his balance in front of his entire extended family. I always feel bad for him when she does that, but if it bothered him as much as it bothers me, he can just take her off the account. I have already told him that if we ever get married, she will not have access to any joint accounts as that's our business and I don't want her input on it.

I need to vent about my FMIL.

Re: I need to vent about my FMIL.

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