SPINOFF FROM PET PEEVE: What's your weirdest idiom???

beethery · August 2014

slothiegal said:

beethery said:

I say holy bananas all the time. A friend's wife used it a lot and somehow I ended up using it. My phrases find their way into others' mouths a lot.

FI says, "We good," and "Trying it" all the time. I find when he says "Tryin' it" particularly hilarious because I got that from a drag queen. I have funnier ones but I can't think of any right now. Still pissing me off!

SIB

"Not today, Satan" and "If it's right, it's right" are part of my daily repertoire. H loves saying, "Don't be jelly of my boogie" whenever I call him out on something.

I've been saying 'What the problem is????" a la

for MONTHS now.

theartistformerlyknownas · August 2014

I think the farting through silk thing means advancing your lot in life/rags to riches kind of thing. Instead of farting into denim you're farting through silk? Idk.

garnetandgold60 · August 2014

My family uses a crazy number of idioms. DH thinks everything I say now is made up (like the word "ragamuffin," no sweetie it's a real word!)

"He don't know me from Adam's house cat."

"That's about as welcome as a hair on a biscuit."

"Good Lord willing, and the creek don't rise."

"No one will notice on a dancing zebra."

"The devil's beating his wife with a frying pan." (In reference to when it's raining but sunny outside)

"It's feezledusting." (When it's raining too lightly for there to be raindrops, but it's too heavy for it to be mist. LONG family story behind that one.)

Inkdancer · August 2014

CaitTDid23 said:

MagicInk said:

My personal favorite "Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya" and my grandma always says "Stick with me kid and I'll have you farting through silk",which...what does that even mean? Is silk really hard to fart through?

It means you'll be rich enough to wear silk underpants!

Inkdancer · August 2014

I say "peachy keen" about everything that is good, or when I am in a good mood. I do not mean it sarcastically. When we're really having a great day, mom and I say "I'm so peachy I'm fuzzy!"

chasseuse · August 2014

I'm not sure these are technically idoms...that said:

Up shit creek without a paddle--in trouble
Freeze your lips and give you tongue a sleigh ride--stop talking

There are more but my brain is fried!

beethery · August 2014

I stole 'Pardon me while I play the grand piano' from Sophia Petrillo. I say it in reference to hearing about people doing fancy/expensive shit. My mom loves it for some reason.

Also, I say "blow it out your ass" ALL THE TIME. And "Pound Sand," short form for "pound sand up your ass."

ShesSoCold · August 2014

I too am a big fan of "blow it out your ass". When I have a good idea or something like that, I'll say "not just a hat rack!". Some people in my office have started saying it too.

hikebikebemerry · August 2014

In my family we often say, "let's blow this Popsicle stand".

Some that I use the most:

"Chafes my knickers"

"Holy Moses on a Poptart"

"Who forgot to dry their underpants today"

ShesSoCold · August 2014

My family like to use weird phrases for being upset. That really grinds my gears, gets my goat, chaps my ass and frosts my ass are my favorites.

Inkdancer · August 2014

OH! I forgot... when someone is needlessly grumpy, I love asking "Who peed in your Cheerios?"

steph861 · August 2014

When my mom thinks somebody is really ugly, she says they look like a bulldog that licked piss off a bramble bush. She got it from a British friend.

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

garnetandgold60 said:

My family uses a crazy number of idioms. DH thinks everything I say now is made up (like the word "ragamuffin," no sweetie it's a real word!)

"He don't know me from Adam's house cat."
"That's about as welcome as a hair on a biscuit."
"Good Lord willing, and the creek don't rise."
"No one will notice on a dancing zebra."
"The devil's beating his wife with a frying pan." (In reference to when it's raining but sunny outside)
"It's feezledusting." (When it's raining too lightly for there to be raindrops, but it's too heavy for it to be mist. LONG family story behind that one.)

OH MY GOD I've heard the Adam's housecat one all my life. The devil beating his wife - when it rained in the sunshine my Mawmaw used to tell us to go stick a pin in the ground and we could hear him.

I'm stealing feezledusting. I love it. It makes me happy that such a fun word exists.

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

chasseuse said:

I'm not sure these are technically idoms...that said:

Up shit creek without a paddle--in trouble
Freeze your lips and give you tongue a sleigh ride--stop talking

There are more but my brain is fried!

...I said this one time to my mom when I was a kid. That was ... an interesting experience. I SWORE she was saying shit every time she used that phrase. Guess what she was ACTUALLY saying? "Chit Creek." No. No mom. Changing the first letter doesn't really make it any more appropriate to say if you don't want your sponge of a child spitting it back out at you....

ETA: the thing I said... I forgot to bold. I have to be at work in 6.5 hours. I need to go to sleep.

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

Inkdancer said:

OH! I forgot... when someone is needlessly grumpy, I love asking "Who peed in your Cheerios?"

I ACTUALLY SAW THIS TODAY! Bossman got peeved about something and called the person he was peeved at "Chicken shit" in an email, and they emailed him back asking him that. It made me gleeful and also wary - I don't want him if someone peed in his cheerios...

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

This is officially my favorite thread ever. It's the bee's knees.

KytchynWitche · August 2014

lolo883 said:

My dad likes to say "whatever blows your skirt up" in reference to whatever makes you happy. I get the strangest looks whenever I use it!

And I'm always a fan of "sweating like a sinner in Church."

I like to say "whatever salts your peanuts". Can be a little tricky when talking to people with less than perfect hearing though...

Edited because forgot to bold, and also: I like to say "grates my tits" for annoys/riles. e.g. "What really grates my tits about living in a tourist town is that visitors think locals have nothing to do all day but wait on/for them."

lovesclimbing · August 2014

CaitTDid23 said:

Y'all y'all y'all humor me and give me the weirdest idiom you've ever heard.

Mine: You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose. (I don't even know where this came from, but my dad says this any time we bitch about friends/family/whatever.)

Ooh, my dad said this one too! My grandpa always said "like stink on a dead horse" in reference to sticking close to someone.

I frequently say "happier than a clam at high tide."

I also quite like "They've got a face for radio," "fell out of an ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down" and "hit by an ugly stick" in reference to ugly people. (Note, I do not trash talk people or call them ugly. This is usually in reference to a celebrity with too much plastic surgery, or rando people who hit on me. They deserve it, and no, I don't say it to their face.)

garnetandgold60 · August 2014

CaitTDid23 said:

garnetandgold60 said:

My family uses a crazy number of idioms. DH thinks everything I say now is made up (like the word "ragamuffin," no sweetie it's a real word!)

"He don't know me from Adam's house cat."
"That's about as welcome as a hair on a biscuit."
"Good Lord willing, and the creek don't rise."
"No one will notice on a dancing zebra."
"The devil's beating his wife with a frying pan." (In reference to when it's raining but sunny outside)
"It's feezledusting." (When it's raining too lightly for there to be raindrops, but it's too heavy for it to be mist. LONG family story behind that one.)

OH MY GOD I've heard the Adam's housecat one all my life. The devil beating his wife - when it rained in the sunshine my Mawmaw used to tell us to go stick a pin in the ground and we could hear him.

I'm stealing feezledusting. I love it. It makes me happy that such a fun word exists.

I use the all the phrases above probably more than I should, which does earn me some strange looks on occasion. I've never heard sticking a pin in the ground, that's too funny! I'll have to add that to my sayings.

Please steal feezledusting! My grandma will get a kick out of the fact others will use it. Her grandfather owned a commercial fishing company and had some random guy following him around to all his spots. Great great grandpa got pissed and called him up on the radio and was telling him to get back to the dock because "Don't you know about feezledust! It means a huge storm is coming in!" (totally made it up, just wanted to get the guy off his butt, but damn if it didn't really storm later that day). Sorry, family story time over now.

emmaaa · August 2014

My dad always says, "don't put green beans in your nose," meaning stay out of trouble. I have caught myself saying all the time.

My aunt used to say, "Don't make me get the fly swatter," in reference to us acting up and that was her way of spanking. She also used to try to call our names and she would go through everyone's name before she got to who she originally meant it for and would, "Oh Lord, I'm calling the role."

I say, "I swaney" a lot which means "I'll be darned." I also just Well, I'll be" too.

FI's favorite is "shit or get off the pot" meaning "either do it or move on."

"Older than Methuselah"

"Fixin' to"

"Colder than a witch's tit in a brass brassiere"

"Sweating like a whore in church"

"Slower than molasses running up in the winter time"

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

emmaaa said:

My dad always says, "don't put green beans in your nose," meaning stay out of trouble. I have caught myself saying all the time.

My aunt used to say, "Don't make me get the fly swatter," in reference to us acting up and that was her way of spanking. She also used to try to call our names and she would go through everyone's name before she got to who she originally meant it for and would, "Oh Lord, I'm calling the role."

I say, "I swaney" a lot which means "I'll be darned." I also just Well, I'll be" too.

FI's favorite is "shit or get off the pot" meaning "either do it or move on."

"Older than Methuselah"
"Fixin' to"
"Colder than a witch's tit in a brass brassiere"
"Sweating like a whore in church"
"Slower than molasses running up in the winter time"

I HAVE LITERALLY HEARD EVERYONE OF THESE except the green bean one. My grandfather used to say "Keep your nose clean, even if it takes both sleeves."

I also say "fixin' to" a whole lot more than I should.

We do tend to say "slower than Christmas" around here instead of "slower than molasses" but I'm noticing as I get older that Christmas is not as slow as it used to be. So I may change that one up.

steph861 · August 2014

CaitTDid23 said:

emmaaa said:

My dad always says, "don't put green beans in your nose," meaning stay out of trouble. I have caught myself saying all the time.

My aunt used to say, "Don't make me get the fly swatter," in reference to us acting up and that was her way of spanking. She also used to try to call our names and she would go through everyone's name before she got to who she originally meant it for and would, "Oh Lord, I'm calling the role."

I say, "I swaney" a lot which means "I'll be darned." I also just Well, I'll be" too.

FI's favorite is "shit or get off the pot" meaning "either do it or move on."

"Older than Methuselah"
"Fixin' to"
"Colder than a witch's tit in a brass brassiere"
"Sweating like a whore in church"
"Slower than molasses running up in the winter time"

I HAVE LITERALLY HEARD EVERYONE OF THESE except the green bean one. My grandfather used to say "Keep your nose clean, even if it takes both sleeves."

I also say "fixin' to" a whole lot more than I should.

We do tend to say "slower than Christmas" around here instead of "slower than molasses" but I'm noticing as I get older that Christmas is not as slow as it used to be. So I may change that one up.

I like "slower than molasses in January." There's an interesting (but tragic) story behind that idiom.

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

steph11814 said:

emmaaa said:

My dad always says, "don't put green beans in your nose," meaning stay out of trouble. I have caught myself saying all the time.

My aunt used to say, "Don't make me get the fly swatter," in reference to us acting up and that was her way of spanking. She also used to try to call our names and she would go through everyone's name before she got to who she originally meant it for and would, "Oh Lord, I'm calling the role."

I say, "I swaney" a lot which means "I'll be darned." I also just Well, I'll be" too.

FI's favorite is "shit or get off the pot" meaning "either do it or move on."

"Older than Methuselah"
"Fixin' to"
"Colder than a witch's tit in a brass brassiere"
"Sweating like a whore in church"
"Slower than molasses running up in the winter time"

I HAVE LITERALLY HEARD EVERYONE OF THESE except the green bean one. My grandfather used to say "Keep your nose clean, even if it takes both sleeves."

I also say "fixin' to" a whole lot more than I should.

We do tend to say "slower than Christmas" around here instead of "slower than molasses" but I'm noticing as I get older that Christmas is not as slow as it used to be. So I may change that one up.
I like "slower than molasses in January." There's an interesting (but tragic) story behind that idiom.

Really? I just always thought because molasses is like super-syrupy syrup that when it got cold it turned into something only slightly runnier than concrete. TO THE GOOGLEMACHINE!

ETA: Oh. Oh my.

emmaaa · August 2014

CaitTDid23 said:

steph11814 said:

emmaaa said:

My dad always says, "don't put green beans in your nose," meaning stay out of trouble. I have caught myself saying all the time.

My aunt used to say, "Don't make me get the fly swatter," in reference to us acting up and that was her way of spanking. She also used to try to call our names and she would go through everyone's name before she got to who she originally meant it for and would, "Oh Lord, I'm calling the role."

I say, "I swaney" a lot which means "I'll be darned." I also just Well, I'll be" too.

FI's favorite is "shit or get off the pot" meaning "either do it or move on."

"Older than Methuselah"
"Fixin' to"
"Colder than a witch's tit in a brass brassiere"
"Sweating like a whore in church"
"Slower than molasses running up in the winter time"

I HAVE LITERALLY HEARD EVERYONE OF THESE except the green bean one. My grandfather used to say "Keep your nose clean, even if it takes both sleeves."

I also say "fixin' to" a whole lot more than I should.

We do tend to say "slower than Christmas" around here instead of "slower than molasses" but I'm noticing as I get older that Christmas is not as slow as it used to be. So I may change that one up.
I like "slower than molasses in January." There's an interesting (but tragic) story behind that idiom.

Really? I just always thought because molasses is like super-syrupy syrup that when it got cold it turned into something only slightly runnier than concrete. TO THE GOOGLEMACHINE!

ETA: Oh. Oh my.

I remember learning that in elementary school...so tragic.

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

emmaaa said:

CaitTDid23 said:

steph11814 said:

emmaaa said:

My dad always says, "don't put green beans in your nose," meaning stay out of trouble. I have caught myself saying all the time.

My aunt used to say, "Don't make me get the fly swatter," in reference to us acting up and that was her way of spanking. She also used to try to call our names and she would go through everyone's name before she got to who she originally meant it for and would, "Oh Lord, I'm calling the role."

I say, "I swaney" a lot which means "I'll be darned." I also just Well, I'll be" too.

FI's favorite is "shit or get off the pot" meaning "either do it or move on."

"Older than Methuselah"
"Fixin' to"
"Colder than a witch's tit in a brass brassiere"
"Sweating like a whore in church"
"Slower than molasses running up in the winter time"

I HAVE LITERALLY HEARD EVERYONE OF THESE except the green bean one. My grandfather used to say "Keep your nose clean, even if it takes both sleeves."

I also say "fixin' to" a whole lot more than I should.

We do tend to say "slower than Christmas" around here instead of "slower than molasses" but I'm noticing as I get older that Christmas is not as slow as it used to be. So I may change that one up.
I like "slower than molasses in January." There's an interesting (but tragic) story behind that idiom.

Really? I just always thought because molasses is like super-syrupy syrup that when it got cold it turned into something only slightly runnier than concrete. TO THE GOOGLEMACHINE!

ETA: Oh. Oh my.

I remember learning that in elementary school...so tragic.

I'd never heard that before. What a weird bit of trivia to learn in elementary school though. Wow.

Now I want to know all the idiom origins though. Why brain? Why?

theartistformerlyknownas · August 2014

@CaitTDid23 best discovery in my mom's basement EVER.
http://www.amazon.com/Why-Do-We-Say-Expressions/dp/1555210104

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

lolo883 said:

@CaitTDid23 best discovery in my mom's basement EVER.
http://www.amazon.com/Why-Do-We-Say-Expressions/dp/1555210104

OH OH OH OH OH MAI GAWD.

timewellwasted93 · August 2014

CaitTDid23 said:

blabla89 said:

Cold as a witch's tit and cold as a grave digger's ass (both courtesy of my late grandfather)

Oooh, yeah, I've heard a variation of this one: "Cold as a witch's brass brassiere." I NEVER understood this as a kid. I had no idea what a "brassiere" was.

chrisandcait said:

Old family sayings:
"Now get out, and never darken my bathtub again!" = it was lovely to see you at my home
"I need to go blow the stink off myself" = I'm going stircrazy, and would like an outing

Also: "Don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you."

I am LOVING the number of "dadioms" coming up too. For some reason, my dad is especially fond of saying, "If a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his ass all the time" when we say something about if we had this or that. Seriously my dad is just weird.

SITB
I've hear it as "If only a toad had wings, it wouldn't bump it's ass on the ground!" whenever someone says "if..."

In my family, we say "the devil's beating his wife" whenever the sun is shining and it's raining.

Not quite an idiom, but we point out "the silver" on the trees. It's not always true, but when the underside of silver maple trees show (which are a lighter green that we call silver), it means there's a storm coming.

hellosweetie1015 · August 2014

timewellwasted93 said:

CaitTDid23 said:

blabla89 said:

Cold as a witch's tit and cold as a grave digger's ass (both courtesy of my late grandfather)

Oooh, yeah, I've heard a variation of this one: "Cold as a witch's brass brassiere." I NEVER understood this as a kid. I had no idea what a "brassiere" was.

chrisandcait said:

Old family sayings:
"Now get out, and never darken my bathtub again!" = it was lovely to see you at my home
"I need to go blow the stink off myself" = I'm going stircrazy, and would like an outing

Also: "Don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you."

I am LOVING the number of "dadioms" coming up too. For some reason, my dad is especially fond of saying, "If a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his ass all the time" when we say something about if we had this or that. Seriously my dad is just weird.

SITB
I've hear it as "If only a toad had wings, it wouldn't bump it's ass on the ground!" whenever someone says "if..."

In my family, we say "the devil's beating his wife" whenever the sun is shining and it's raining.

Not quite an idiom, but we point out "the silver" on the trees. It's not always true, but when the underside of silver maple trees show (which are a lighter green that we call silver), it means there's a storm coming.

I ALWAYS WONDERED WHAT THAT MEANT. I love the Dark Is Rising sequence, and the last book is called Silver On the Tree. And, of course, the last book has the most drama ("storms"). Clever titling.

beethery · August 2014

timewellwasted93 said:

CaitTDid23 said:

blabla89 said:
Cold as a witch's tit and cold as a grave digger's ass (both courtesy of my late grandfather)
Oooh, yeah, I've heard a variation of this one: "Cold as a witch's brass brassiere." I NEVER understood this as a kid. I had no idea what a "brassiere" was.

chrisandcait said:
Old family sayings:
"Now get out, and never darken my bathtub again!" = it was lovely to see you at my home
"I need to go blow the stink off myself" = I'm going stircrazy, and would like an outing

Also: "Don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you."

I am LOVING the number of "dadioms" coming up too. For some reason, my dad is especially fond of saying, "If a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his ass all the time" when we say something about if we had this or that. Seriously my dad is just weird.

SITB
I've hear it as "If only a toad had wings, it wouldn't bump it's ass on the ground!" whenever someone says "if..."

In my family, we say "the devil's beating his wife" whenever the sun is shining and it's raining.

Not quite an idiom, but we point out "the silver" on the trees. It's not always true, but when the underside of silver maple trees show (which are a lighter green that we call silver), it means there's a storm coming.

My great grandma used to tell us it was going to rain if the leaves were upside down! I've never talked to anybody else before who'd heard of that.

SPINOFF FROM PET PEEVE: What's your weirdest idiom???

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