Wedding Party

Adult Flower Girls?

My sweet little nieces are actually adults. By the time my wedding date rolls around they will be 25, 23, and 19 years old. But I really want them to be my flower girls... flower ladies... pedal attendants. The girls are actually excited and want to be pedal attendants but I'm wondering how incredibly odd it will really look. Obviously they aren't going to be dressed up like little girl flower girls. 
Thoughts?
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Re: Adult Flower Girls?

  • Two thoughts:
    1).  It sounds a bit like you're b-listing them from being bridesmaids. 
    2).  If they wear a dress that compliments the colors in the wedding, and simply walk down with petals, it could be fun. 


  • At my friend's AHR, she jokingly said that she should have made me her flower girl. I would have loved that.
  • My sweet little nieces are actually adults. By the time my wedding date rolls around they will be 25, 23, and 19 years old. But I really want them to be my flower girls... flower ladies... pedal attendants. The girls are actually excited and want to be pedal attendants but I'm wondering how incredibly odd it will really look. Obviously they aren't going to be dressed up like little girl flower girls. 
    Thoughts?
    Ditto Sarahbear.  You walk a fine line with having "flower girls" who are older than say 10.  
  • This sounds super weird to me, but I also attended a wedding last year with a 20 year old flower girl (the wedding was overseas, maybe it was cultural).  I think its a very fine line about what's ok and what's not...definitely don't call them or list them as flower "girls".
  • I would seriously side eye this if I ever witnessed it at a wedding. Fuck no.
  • I personally think it's super weird.  But if they're comfortable with it (which i can't imagine they would honestly be) then I suppose it's not horrible. 
  • Our flower girls are our 18 year old cousins (one from each side) who both feel it is their greatest disappointment in life that they've never been one before, and are ridiculously excited.  They chose what they're wearing together (strapless blue with a fluffy skirt), and jump up and down squealing every time we talk about the wedding.

    They're going to be tossing petals down the aisle, but we'll have regular bouquets waiting for them at the front to swap out the baskets for once they get there.  Most of this has been their brainchild - the only thing I added was the bouquets.

    **The OMH formerly known as jsangel1018**
  • Our flower girls are our 18 year old cousins (one from each side) who both feel it is their greatest disappointment in life that they've never been one before, and are ridiculously excited.  They chose what they're wearing together (strapless blue with a fluffy skirt), and jump up and down squealing every time we talk about the wedding.

    They're going to be tossing petals down the aisle, but we'll have regular bouquets waiting for them at the front to swap out the baskets for once they get there.  Most of this has been their brainchild - the only thing I added was the bouquets.

    Can you skip the petals? I'm sorry, I just think this is so absurd and childish. To each his own, I suppose but you would get a serious eyeroll from me. 
  • I really feel the only way this will work is if your entire family has a sense of humor and they overact their part.

    Adult flower girls acting all graceful looks strange. Let's be honest; flower girls and ring bearers are really just an excuse to parade small children in front of people to go "awwwww". It's not a real job or a very important thing for a wedding.

    I agree with others in making them bridesmaids, although I still like the idea of the three of them wearing a complimentary color to the other bridesmaids just because it's nice to break up the monotony of most wedding color themes.
  • My sweet little nieces are actually adults. By the time my wedding date rolls around they will be 25, 23, and 19 years old. But I really want them to be my flower girls... flower ladies... pedal attendants. The girls are actually excited and want to be pedal attendants but I'm wondering how incredibly odd it will really look. Obviously they aren't going to be dressed up like little girl flower girls. 
    Thoughts?
    At that age there is no way in hell I'd agree to be a "flower girl" and drop petals down the aisle for you.  I'd be happy to be a bridesmaid like all of the other adults, but not a flower girl which is a role reserved for a child.

    As a guest I would feel embarrassed for your nieces and I'd side-eye the hell out of you for not making them bridesmaids if you wanted to include them in your wedding.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • Sorry, I'm not a fan. And as a guest, I would think it's really weird. Just make them bridesmaids if you want to include them. 
  • geekykitties I was a flower girl for my younger brother's wedding (I was 21).  We had a blast with it! I jokingly said when he got engaged that I volunteer for flower girl because him and my SIL weren't having any female attendants (3 men standing, everyone in uniform except the bride, looked great).  I guess a week or so when going over the ceremony the officiant asked about a flower girl and SIL was like let's let your sister do it.  I got a text saying the bought my basket and needed a dress in one of 3 colours.  We had a good laugh at the whole thing and my family thought it was hilarious.
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  • If the rest of the wedding was properly hosted, grown women as flower girls wouldn't leave a bad taste in my mouth.  However, if your nieces are going to walk down the aisle scattering petals, why not have them walk down the aisle holding bouquets?  It looks more age-appropriate.
  • I have a friend who wanted to do this. She ended up not doing it, and I was secretly relieved b/c I thought it was just silly, but I would never have told her so unless she directly asked me what I thought.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • Our flower girls are our 18 year old cousins (one from each side) who both feel it is their greatest disappointment in life that they've never been one before, and are ridiculously excited.  They chose what they're wearing together (strapless blue with a fluffy skirt), and jump up and down squealing every time we talk about the wedding.

    They're going to be tossing petals down the aisle, but we'll have regular bouquets waiting for them at the front to swap out the baskets for once they get there.  Most of this has been their brainchild - the only thing I added was the bouquets.

    Can you skip the petals? I'm sorry, I just think this is so absurd and childish. To each his own, I suppose but you would get a serious eyeroll from me. 


    They've asked for the petals - so if they want to, they can.  The only reason they're not walking with the bouquets is so that they don't have to juggle a bouquet and a basket at the same time.  They'll be standing with the rest of the bridesmaids with their bouquets once they get to the front.

    And honestly - I got them the bouquets so that if they decide day of that they don't want to do petals, we're covered and they won't have nothing.

    **The OMH formerly known as jsangel1018**
  • I honestly love this! Our wedding is more fun and outside of the box - so we could get away with something like this as well. Have fun with your day - and as long as the ladies are in to it and aren't dressed like 5 year olds - this is a part of it!
  • Our flower girls are our 18 year old cousins (one from each side) who both feel it is their greatest disappointment in life that they've never been one before, and are ridiculously excited.  They chose what they're wearing together (strapless blue with a fluffy skirt), and jump up and down squealing every time we talk about the wedding.

    They're going to be tossing petals down the aisle, but we'll have regular bouquets waiting for them at the front to swap out the baskets for once they get there.  Most of this has been their brainchild - the only thing I added was the bouquets.

    Seriously!? Their greatest disappointment in life?! First world problems! Maybe at 18 they should realise that you do not get everything you feel you are entitled to and that they should focus on more productive things. 


    Not that it matters, because you don't know these girls - but I tend to be a bit heavy on the sarcasm side of things.  These girls work hard.  They're allowed to be excited about things.

    Cousin #1 (his) has just started grade 12, and works so much after school and during weekends that she was able to pay cash for her new car, on her own.  She's also heavily involved in sports, and maintains a high GPA.

    Cousin #2 (mine) has just started her first year of university, full ride, after graduating with honours from an IB high school.  She's taking psychology, science strain.

    So yes, first world problems. 

    **The OMH formerly known as jsangel1018**
  • edited September 2014
    My 18 y/o niece was the ring bearer in my brothers wedding last year. Their wedding was very small, only family, so I think everyone saw the humor in it and she was happy. She wore a lighter blue dress from the bridesmaids, carried the rings in a little pearl purse, had a pretty corsage, and stood between my brother and his Best Man. The Best Man was our older brother, her dad. The three of them were sweet standing together.
  • Slightly off subject, but our venue (church) allowed no real or synthetic petals in the church. Outside, yes to real petals only. Just advice here to check with your venue.
  • This kind of weirds me out. The only thing that is more uncomfortable than this is the pinterest-y trend of having grandmothers be flower girls. Ugh.
  • samanthab90, you didn't feel out of place? I'd feel insulted that the bride wants me to be a 'flower girl' throwing petals for her instead of having me as a bridesmaid. Especially with her having no bridesmaids to begin with. 
  • samanthab90, you didn't feel out of place? I'd feel insulted that the bride wants me to be a 'flower girl' throwing petals for her instead of having me as a bridesmaid. Especially with her having no bridesmaids to begin with. 
    No I didn't feel out of place at all.  We had a blast, it didn't mean I was treated like a child I was still treated like an adult.  If I wasn't a flower girl I wouldn't have been in the wedding since it was originally 2 men standing (one on each side) then it changed to 3 men.  There was also no one at the "flower girl" ago whatsoever. I would have felt off as a bridesmaid because I only met the bride a handful of times before the wedding.

    Also a bonus for them, they didn't have a flower girl have a meltdown/tantrum in the middle of the processional/ceremony.  *Yes, I know most people do not mind this and most flower girls don't lose their sh*t,but I'm not having a flower girl for this exact reason.
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  • Adult women are sad that they were never flower girls?

    Of all the wierd-ass shit to cling to.
    It's all kind of  a weird-ass concept, really. Adults assuming children's roles, when they could have perfectly reasonable counterpart adult roles- bridesmaids.

    Honestly, if anyone said "Petal Attendant" to me in serious conversation, it would be a laugh milk out my nose moment. Because there is enough contrived silliness in the wedding world; there is no need to make up silly names for sillier positions. 

    I vote for dignity. An adult is a bridesmaid, or attendant. A flower girl is a child. 

    Petal Attendants, Flower Maidens, Petal Princesses, Weed Walkers- why would anyone make up a really dumb pretend title when a perfectly good real one exists? Why? 
  • LondonLisaLondonLisa member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited September 2014
    Adult women are sad that they were never flower girls?

    Of all the wierd-ass shit to cling to.
    I see this as sad, sad women who were see it as "their greatest disappointment in life" that were they never got to play the angel in the school Nativity play. Would you condone they get their teacher friend to push aside some young student so a grown adult could wear fairy wings and a white dress in the school gymnasium???  It is just strange.
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