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mrsr101214 · September 2014

This post has been twisted to make me sound like a crazy person. My fiancé's father and his father's wife mentioned that "this year is about [us])... We did not say that. Don't waste your time typing comments here-I am not interested in hearing comments that are based on misinterpretations. Decision has been made.

MNVegas · September 2014

cbroyland said:

My fiancé's father just remarried at the end of July (totally spur of the moment-they have us 8 days notice). We do not approve of this new marriage and don't really know her (she lives 13+ hours away and we had only spent 5 days with her before they got married). Are we supposed to get her a corsage now that they're married? We're a little annoyed at the whole situation because we had been told since they got engaged (5 months before) that they wouldn't even be taking about their wedding until after we for married (10/12/14) because this year is about us; however, at obviously didn't happen. This is his dad's wife, not his step-mom and she has no relationship with is. We are getting my fiancé's Godmother (his mom's sister) a corsage as his mom passed away 8 years ago and his aunt is doing the "mother-son" dance with him. I don't think we have to get her a corsage-and my fiancé does not want to get her one-just want everyone's opinion! Thank you!

To answer your question, no you don't NEED to get her a corsage.

To the bolded: you do need to adjust your attitude. NO you don't get a year, or a month or a week. You get one day and one day only!

AddieCake · September 2014

This YEAR is about you? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahha! I would get her a corsage.

mrsr101214 · September 2014

No attitude adjustment needed. I should've put that in quotes-that was a direct quote from her... That "this year" is about is. We are both the most down to earth about the whole wedding planning and process, but thanks for your concern..... @AddieCake‌ @MNVegas‌

banana468 · September 2014

I'd get her a corsage. She is married to the father of the groom!

Of all the battles to pick, a corsage costs what, $20? Just do it and be gracious.

misshart00 · September 2014

Came for the "..." That was tame. Why the DD OP?

huskypuppy14 · September 2014

Came for the bat signal. Thanks for quoting MNvegas.

I don't think you need to get her a corsage, those are supposed to be reserved for the VIPs, which she is not.

My sister and her husband didn't get a a corsage for her FIL's girlfriend.

You don't get a corsage just because you are married to the FOG, IMHO.

However, OP you get one day for your wedding, not a whole year- that's absurd. I was engaged and married in under a year.

mrsr101214 · September 2014

Thank you all, I understand that... My fiancé's father and his wife were the ones that said that this was our year.... We do not feel that way. But thanks for everyone's unnecessary scolding....

holyguacamole79 · September 2014

cbroyland said:

My fiancé's father just remarried at the end of July (totally spur of the moment-they have us 8 days notice). We do not approve of this new marriage and don't really know her (she lives 13+ hours away and we had only spent 5 days with her before they got married). Are we supposed to get her a corsage now that they're married? We're a little annoyed at the whole situation because we had been told since they got engaged (5 months before) that they wouldn't even be taking about their wedding until after we for married (10/12/14) because this year is about us; however, at obviously didn't happen. This is his dad's wife, not his step-mom and she has no relationship with is. We are getting my fiancé's Godmother (his mom's sister) a corsage as his mom passed away 8 years ago and his aunt is doing the "mother-son" dance with him. I don't think we have to get her a corsage-and my fiancé does not want to get her one-just want everyone's opinion! Thank you!

Agree with flantastic. Nobody needs a corsage. And OP, you don't get a whole year for your wedding. You get a day.

misshart00 · September 2014

I think FFIL's wife said the whole year thing.

huskypuppy14 · September 2014

cbroyland said:

Thank you all, I understand that... My fiancé's father and his wife were the ones that said that this was our year.... We do not feel that way. But thanks for everyone's unnecessary scolding....

We can only go by what you said. And you gave no indication until this post above that you understood that this year is not all about you.

No one was mean, just matter of fact.

mrsr101214 · September 2014

Thank you @misshart00‌ , you are correct!

mrsr101214 · September 2014

I had edited my question, but people were only reading what was quoted.... So I edited the info I provided...

perdonami · September 2014

@cbroyland: I'm glad that you are taking a relaxed approach to your wedding planning because it can get stressful sometimes. Im also glad to see that you know you only get one special day. But as you can already see from this one little issue involving your FFIL's new wife, its easy to get carried away. Try not to worry so much about what other people are doing and know that they are not too worried about your wedding either. Most of the time, us brides care more about our wedding than our guests. Take the high road and buy her a corsage if you think its appropriate but don't feel like your obligated too. Just make sure that whether you choose to buy her one or not, that you are not making a point of giving one only to your FI's father and not her. There really is no need to hurt her feelings unecessarily. ETA: Tried adding paragraphs but theknot wouldn't let me.

holyguacamole79 · September 2014

I didn't see the other posts regarding the year thing when I posted.

Also, OP, be sure to include her in family pictures. He is your FI's dad's wife and belongs in family photos.

chibiyui · September 2014

sarahbear31 said:
I didn't see the other posts regarding the year thing when I posted.

Also, OP, be sure to include her in family pictures. He is your FI's dad's wife and belongs in family photos.

Speaking of unwanted family in pics, it's totally cool to get pictures with just dad as well, just make sure you get pics with dad and the new wife.

climbingsingle · September 2014

She's married to your FFIL now. Why not be nice and start out a relationship with her on the right foot? Get her a corsage. She'll probably really appreciate it.

Liatris2010 · September 2014

They are adults, they do not need you to approve of their marriage. She doesn't need a corsage, but the reasons you've given (we don't approve, they didn't make an ENTIRE YEAR about us) are petty. As penance for your attitude, I think you should give her a corsage. Maybe if you start behaving graciously your attitude will improve.

mrsr101214 · September 2014

@Liatris2010‌ you are so wrong about me. Hahahahaha..... Wow! Penance for my attitude?! Should I mention that I have been nice to her-I took her for her pre wedding mani and pedi-treated her as well. Did their ceremony and reception music. Etc. Jeeze! The first time and last time I ever try to get help here! I NEVER said that our wedding was an entire year celebration, my fiancé's father and his father's wife said that.... So thanks for your "help" but next time, no thanks!

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 · September 2014

This is your FFIL's wife. Get her the friggin' corsage. Maybe you'll be friends after all. If not, you're being nice. Is anyone else getting a corsage? I think she'll notice if other people get them and she doesn't. It could make things worse.

holyguacamole79 · September 2014

Liatris2010 said:

They are adults, they do not need you to approve of their marriage. She doesn't need a corsage, but the reasons you've given (we don't approve, they didn't make an ENTIRE YEAR about us) are petty. As penance for your attitude, I think you should give her a corsage. Maybe if you start behaving graciously your attitude will improve.

I snorted when I read this.

The more I think about it, I agree that nobody necessarily needs a corsage ... but, if I went to a wedding and saw that the father of the groom's wife didn't have a corsage, but his aunt did, I'd raise an eyebrow and wonder why she got slighted. Cost-benefit analysis - it'll cost you max $20 and will just keep the peace.

Liatris2010 · September 2014

sarahbear31 said:

Liatris2010 said:

They are adults, they do not need you to approve of their marriage. She doesn't need a corsage, but the reasons you've given (we don't approve, they didn't make an ENTIRE YEAR about us) are petty. As penance for your attitude, I think you should give her a corsage. Maybe if you start behaving graciously your attitude will improve.

I snorted when I read this.

The more I think about it, I agree that nobody necessarily needs a corsage ... but, if I went to a wedding and saw that the father of the groom's wife didn't have a corsage, but his aunt did, I'd raise an eyebrow and wonder why she got slighted. Cost-benefit analysis - it'll cost you max $20 and will just keep the peace.

Especially from me right?

LDay2014 · September 2014

OP, it's $20 to keep the peace. Give her a corsage, as respect to your FFIL and call it a day. Done

holyguacamole79 · September 2014

Liatris2010 said:

sarahbear31 said:

Liatris2010 said:

They are adults, they do not need you to approve of their marriage. She doesn't need a corsage, but the reasons you've given (we don't approve, they didn't make an ENTIRE YEAR about us) are petty. As penance for your attitude, I think you should give her a corsage. Maybe if you start behaving graciously your attitude will improve.

I snorted when I read this.

The more I think about it, I agree that nobody necessarily needs a corsage ... but, if I went to a wedding and saw that the father of the groom's wife didn't have a corsage, but his aunt did, I'd raise an eyebrow and wonder why she got slighted. Cost-benefit analysis - it'll cost you max $20 and will just keep the peace.

Especially from me right?

You make me so proud.

mrsr101214 · September 2014

@sarahbear31 and you make me wanna vomit

holyguacamole79 · September 2014

oh calm down. The back & forth between me & @Liatris2010 regarding penance is based on conversations she & I have had regarding religion.

slothiegal · September 2014

cbroyland said:

@sarahbear31 and you make me wanna vomit

Certainly seems like an overreaction to someone who wasn't commenting to you (and when she was, was giving you calm, rational advice).

wrigleyville · September 2014

cbroyland said:

@sarahbear31 and you make me wanna vomit

Are you 13?

Because seriously.

beethery · September 2014

OP, If the vomit thing had gone down with a clever gif usage (like below), I would have silently lauded you. Even if you were in the wrong.

However, you went about it in a lame way, and I remain unimpressed with your actions. Good day, madame.

holyguacamole79 · September 2014

Shit, even I couldn't resist a good Bea Arthur gif.

beethery · September 2014

sarahbear31 said:

Shit, even I couldn't resist a good Bea Arthur gif.

Swear to god, someone ever comes for me with a Bea Arthur gif, I'm going to repent.

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