Budget Weddings Forum

Mountain Wedding Success!

We cut costs wherever possible, and we had the most amazing wedding. We are a same sex couple, she wore a suit we had tailored and I bought a dress on ebay that was new in the box, and had it fit to size. We carried bouquets of daisies and had friends make centerpieces with mason jars, babies breath, eucalyptus and wildflowers. Instead of a cake, we had a pie bar, our guests brought 60 amazing home made pies! we decorated the aisle with stumps, topped with white candles, leaves and pine sprigs. A friend who DJ's on the side ran the sound and music, and the whole thing was gorgeous and incredible. Friends did our hair and makeup and my sister did THE WORST nail painting job the morning of the wedding. A sweet gesture and enjoyable time between us. The weather held and the BBQ was great.
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Re: Mountain Wedding Success!

  • congrats






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I would have LOVED that wedding. Sounds like you know how to throw a party and make every guest feel special. Much luck for a wonderful life together.
  • emandmeg said:
    We cut costs wherever possible, and we had the most amazing wedding. We are a same sex couple, she wore a suit we had tailored and I bought a dress on ebay that was new in the box, and had it fit to size. We carried bouquets of daisies and had friends make centerpieces with mason jars, babies breath, eucalyptus and wildflowers. Instead of a cake, we had a pie bar, our guests brought 60 amazing home made pies! we decorated the aisle with stumps, topped with white candles, leaves and pine sprigs. A friend who DJ's on the side ran the sound and music, and the whole thing was gorgeous and incredible. Friends did our hair and makeup and my sister did THE WORST nail painting job the morning of the wedding. A sweet gesture and enjoyable time between us. The weather held and the BBQ was great.
    You asked your guests to supply your food? 
  • dontthinkflydontthinkfly member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
    edited August 2014
    it sounds like they did ask them to bring pies, they brought them, they were delicious, and everyone had fun! please, don't start this conversation (which will... cause an argument). no one here cares.
  • it sounds like they did ask them to bring pies, they brought them, they were delicious, and everyone had fun! please, don't start this conversation (which will... cause an argument). no one here cares.
    I care.  A lot of us care, in fact.  Potlucks for weddings are horribly rude.



  • thelastdreamer it sounds like a beautiful day!
  • I'd love to contribute a baked good for a wedding...because I'm a show-off.  ;-)

    Seriously, though...it would make me feel even more part of the day.  That could be an interesting tradition, especially in cases where the couple is "grown" enough to not need another coffee maker!  Maybe you've started a new thing here!

    T.

    P.S.  Congrats!  I'm so happy to be an ally during this part of history where *ALL* of my friends will probably soon have the right to marry.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Congratulations! It sounds so lovely and personal and special!
  • haha! i totally agree! i am a baking show-off when i want to be. it would be awesome to have the most delicious pie at the wedding... 
  • I'd love to contribute a baked good for a wedding...because I'm a show-off.  ;-)

    Seriously, though...it would make me feel even more part of the day.  That could be an interesting tradition, especially in cases where the couple is "grown" enough to not need another coffee maker!  Maybe you've started a new thing here!

    T.

    P.S.  Congrats!  I'm so happy to be an ally during this part of history where *ALL* of my friends will probably soon have the right to marry.
    Apparently, in some cultures, this is a tradition. One of my friends had a cookie table at her wedding reception. The cookies were all made by various female members of her family. We were all expected to fill little boxes to take home. There was much coordination among the women over who was baking which family recipe! (And no, these were not considered the favors, nor were they a replacement for cake!)
  • Sounds like you all had a relaxed and fabulous day. Just the feel I would like to create. Congrats! 
  • chasseuse said:
    Apparently, in some cultures, this is a tradition. One of my friends had a cookie table at her wedding reception. The cookies were all made by various female members of her family. We were all expected to fill little boxes to take home. There was much coordination among the women over who was baking which family recipe! (And no, these were not considered the favors, nor were they a replacement for cake!)
    It is here. There is ALWAYS a cookie table. No one is asked to do anything, those who want to make cookies, offer. People enjoy showing off their baking skills. You fill a box to take home at the end of the night.

    We DJ'd many weddings back in the day. There was one incredible spread of cookies that were all made by the bride's father. Gorgeous little cookies, it must have taken him weeks.

    It sounds like a lovely day! Congratulations, I wish you both much happiness.
  • CONGRATULATIONS!! I'm so happy for you both!! So glad your wedding was everything you dreamed it would be!! PS I too am a baking show off lol I would LOVE to bring something to a wedding and would feel more included! PLUS how awesome would it be to taste other people's baking AND get recipes ;)
    image
  • edited August 2014
    Every time I see a comment like this on these boards it is the same person.  You seem to have a lot of negative opinions that you are all too happy to share.  I think I speak for a lot of people on here when I remind you that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.  I, like lots of others here am a total baking show-off and I love feeling included in an event when asked to bring something.  Sounds like your wedding was a lovely intimate affair.  Congratulations! 
    Viczaesar said:
    it sounds like they did ask them to bring pies, they brought them, they were delicious, and everyone had fun! please, don't start this conversation (which will... cause an argument). no one here cares.
    I care.  A lot of us care, in fact.  Potlucks for weddings are horribly rude.

  • Every time I see a comment like this on these boards it is the same person.  You seem to have a lot of negative opinions that you are all too happy to share.  I think I speak for a lot of people on here when I remind you that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.  I, like lots of others here am a total baking show-off and I love feeling included in an event when asked to bring something.  Sounds like your wedding was a lovely intimate affair.  Congratulations! 
    Viczaesar said:
    it sounds like they did ask them to bring pies, they brought them, they were delicious, and everyone had fun! please, don't start this conversation (which will... cause an argument). no one here cares.
    I care.  A lot of us care, in fact.  Potlucks for weddings are horribly rude.


    I'll speak my mind whenever and wherever I damn well want to.  If you want to do something rude, I am going to tell you it's rude.  Don't like it?  Tough titties.  If you think I'm the only person here who voices the fact that potluck weddings are rude then I double dog dare you to start a thread asking people's opinions on potluck weddings.

    Guess what?  I'm also a total baking show off!  I'm told all the time that I should open a bakery.  I bring baked goods to gatherings all the time when I know that they're appreciated.  I bake goods for the meetings I call and have people come just for the goodies.  I bake treats for the grad lounge just because, and when it's been a while since I brought something in I get people asking when I'm bringing something and talking about their favorite thing I've baked.  But none of that is relevant.  A wedding is a hosted event.  You invite guests to witness your wedding ceremony, and then you host them with appropriate beverages and food items for the time of day as a thank you to your guests.  It is absolutely inappropriate and rude to ask/demand that your guests host themselves.  This is truly one of the rudest things you can do at a wedding.



  • Viczaesar  ``A wedding is a hosted event.  You invite guests to witness your wedding ceremony, and then you host them with appropriate beverages and food items for the time of day as a thank you to your guests.``

    You are wrong. A wedding is two people getting married. How they celebrate depends entirely on how they and their families and friends feel about it.
    In my circles wedding parties are NOT to thank the guests for watching our ceremonies. A lot of my friends and myself didn´t  even have ceremonies since we are not religious. Are you to tell me that non religious people are not allowed to celebrate? Or is it up to you to tell us how exactly to celebrate?

    If emandmeg is from circles who celebrate weddings with potlucks , your opinion of their way of celebration is irrelevant.  I have never heard of potluck weddings until this forum and yet apparently this is a common practice in some circles.
    It may have been rude to you, if you were invited , but luckily for them and you, you were not invited. Whoever was invited actually liked to participate and enjoyed it.

    To be rude by definition means to offend somebody. If nobody is offended and that is the common practice , it is not rude. Like when you wrote  ``Tough titties.`` , to me it is rude. To you it obviously is not. Maybe thats how you talk to eachother in your family and with your friends.

    Emandmeg, congratulations! Your wedding sounds great. I have helped friends with hair, makeup and decorations and loved it. I also loved the compliments for what I did , so I am sure that your guests were not offended and truly enjoyed themselves
  • Some people are just miserable individuals who take satisfaction from making others miserable too.  This board is not for that, sorry you'll have to find another outlet for your misery.  Your "tough titties" mentality does nothing but make me pity you and those who have to be around you.  Good luck with your sad self... 
    Viczaesar said:
    Every time I see a comment like this on these boards it is the same person.  You seem to have a lot of negative opinions that you are all too happy to share.  I think I speak for a lot of people on here when I remind you that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.  I, like lots of others here am a total baking show-off and I love feeling included in an event when asked to bring something.  Sounds like your wedding was a lovely intimate affair.  Congratulations! 
    Viczaesar said:
    it sounds like they did ask them to bring pies, they brought them, they were delicious, and everyone had fun! please, don't start this conversation (which will... cause an argument). no one here cares.
    I care.  A lot of us care, in fact.  Potlucks for weddings are horribly rude.


    I'll speak my mind whenever and wherever I damn well want to.  If you want to do something rude, I am going to tell you it's rude.  Don't like it?  Tough titties.  If you think I'm the only person here who voices the fact that potluck weddings are rude then I double dog dare you to start a thread asking people's opinions on potluck weddings.

    Guess what?  I'm also a total baking show off!  I'm told all the time that I should open a bakery.  I bring baked goods to gatherings all the time when I know that they're appreciated.  I bake goods for the meetings I call and have people come just for the goodies.  I bake treats for the grad lounge just because, and when it's been a while since I brought something in I get people asking when I'm bringing something and talking about their favorite thing I've baked.  But none of that is relevant.  A wedding is a hosted event.  You invite guests to witness your wedding ceremony, and then you host them with appropriate beverages and food items for the time of day as a thank you to your guests.  It is absolutely inappropriate and rude to ask/demand that your guests host themselves.  This is truly one of the rudest things you can do at a wedding.

  • Some people are just miserable individuals who take satisfaction from making others miserable too.  This board is not for that, sorry you'll have to find another outlet for your misery.  Your "tough titties" mentality does nothing but make me pity you and those who have to be around you.  Good luck with your sad self... 
    Viczaesar said:
    Every time I see a comment like this on these boards it is the same person.  You seem to have a lot of negative opinions that you are all too happy to share.  I think I speak for a lot of people on here when I remind you that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.  I, like lots of others here am a total baking show-off and I love feeling included in an event when asked to bring something.  Sounds like your wedding was a lovely intimate affair.  Congratulations! 
    Viczaesar said:
    it sounds like they did ask them to bring pies, they brought them, they were delicious, and everyone had fun! please, don't start this conversation (which will... cause an argument). no one here cares.
    I care.  A lot of us care, in fact.  Potlucks for weddings are horribly rude.


    I'll speak my mind whenever and wherever I damn well want to.  If you want to do something rude, I am going to tell you it's rude.  Don't like it?  Tough titties.  If you think I'm the only person here who voices the fact that potluck weddings are rude then I double dog dare you to start a thread asking people's opinions on potluck weddings.

    Guess what?  I'm also a total baking show off!  I'm told all the time that I should open a bakery.  I bring baked goods to gatherings all the time when I know that they're appreciated.  I bake goods for the meetings I call and have people come just for the goodies.  I bake treats for the grad lounge just because, and when it's been a while since I brought something in I get people asking when I'm bringing something and talking about their favorite thing I've baked.  But none of that is relevant.  A wedding is a hosted event.  You invite guests to witness your wedding ceremony, and then you host them with appropriate beverages and food items for the time of day as a thank you to your guests.  It is absolutely inappropriate and rude to ask/demand that your guests host themselves.  This is truly one of the rudest things you can do at a wedding.

    time for another round of BiNGO!!
  • TiaTea said:
    Viczaesar  ``A wedding is a hosted event.  You invite guests to witness your wedding ceremony, and then you host them with appropriate beverages and food items for the time of day as a thank you to your guests.``

    You are wrong. A wedding is two people getting married. How they celebrate depends entirely on how they and their families and friends feel about it.
    In my circles wedding parties are NOT to thank the guests for watching our ceremonies. A lot of my friends and myself didn´t  even have ceremonies since we are not religious. Are you to tell me that non religious people are not allowed to celebrate? Or is it up to you to tell us how exactly to celebrate?

    If emandmeg is from circles who celebrate weddings with potlucks , your opinion of their way of celebration is irrelevant.  I have never heard of potluck weddings until this forum and yet apparently this is a common practice in some circles.
    It may have been rude to you, if you were invited , but luckily for them and you, you were not invited. Whoever was invited actually liked to participate and enjoyed it.

    To be rude by definition means to offend somebody. If nobody is offended and that is the common practice , it is not rude. Like when you wrote  ``Tough titties.`` , to me it is rude. To you it obviously is not. Maybe thats how you talk to eachother in your family and with your friends.

    Emandmeg, congratulations! Your wedding sounds great. I have helped friends with hair, makeup and decorations and loved it. I also loved the compliments for what I did , so I am sure that your guests were not offended and truly enjoyed themselves
    A wedding stops being all about the two people getting married when those two people invite other people to attend. Then the two people getting married also become two people hosting a party. When you ask people to spend their time celebrating you, you must host them appropriately. It is not appropriate to ask people to spend their time and money celebrating you, and also to spend their time and money providing refreshment for you and your other friends.

    image
  • ... since when did this site become about raining on someone else's (already past) parade?  
    The fact that anyone would make someone want to question what I'm sure was one of the happiest days of her life is just mean spirited.  Come on people.
  • TiaTea said:
    Viczaesar  ``A wedding is a hosted event.  You invite guests to witness your wedding ceremony, and then you host them with appropriate beverages and food items for the time of day as a thank you to your guests.``

    You are wrong. A wedding is two people getting married. How they celebrate depends entirely on how they and their families and friends feel about it.
    In my circles wedding parties are NOT to thank the guests for watching our ceremonies. A lot of my friends and myself didn´t  even have ceremonies since we are not religious. Are you to tell me that non religious people are not allowed to celebrate? Or is it up to you to tell us how exactly to celebrate?

    If emandmeg is from circles who celebrate weddings with potlucks , your opinion of their way of celebration is irrelevant.  I have never heard of potluck weddings until this forum and yet apparently this is a common practice in some circles.
    It may have been rude to you, if you were invited , but luckily for them and you, you were not invited. Whoever was invited actually liked to participate and enjoyed it.

    To be rude by definition means to offend somebody. If nobody is offended and that is the common practice , it is not rude. Like when you wrote  ``Tough titties.`` , to me it is rude. To you it obviously is not. Maybe thats how you talk to eachother in your family and with your friends.

    Emandmeg, congratulations! Your wedding sounds great. I have helped friends with hair, makeup and decorations and loved it. I also loved the compliments for what I did , so I am sure that your guests were not offended and truly enjoyed themselves
    LMFAO this is fucking hysterical. Between you @TiaTea and you, @Bahamabride2015, I can't think of anyone more absurd that I've seen posting this week.

    image

    I hope your crappily-hosted parties were a blast. And I hope you both get new reading glasses soon, and have some money saved up to pay the jeweler when you bust your pearls from clutching them so hard.

    Vic educated you on how not to be a shitty host. She didn't try to educate you on how not to be rude on the internet because that isn't the focus of this fucking board. Have fun, all the best to you both, etc etc.

    @Viczaesar god bless you for making the effort. Some brick walls just won't accept the teachings of good hosting.
    --

    I'm the fuck
    out.

    image
  • Wow.. classy.  Checking out of this conversation now as so people clearly have no tact.  All I can say is to each their own and emandmeg, I hope you had the best day of your life full of happiness and no regrets.  Something I think everyone deserves. xo

    beethery said:
    TiaTea said:
    Viczaesar  ``A wedding is a hosted event.  You invite guests to witness your wedding ceremony, and then you host them with appropriate beverages and food items for the time of day as a thank you to your guests.``

    You are wrong. A wedding is two people getting married. How they celebrate depends entirely on how they and their families and friends feel about it.
    In my circles wedding parties are NOT to thank the guests for watching our ceremonies. A lot of my friends and myself didn´t  even have ceremonies since we are not religious. Are you to tell me that non religious people are not allowed to celebrate? Or is it up to you to tell us how exactly to celebrate?

    If emandmeg is from circles who celebrate weddings with potlucks , your opinion of their way of celebration is irrelevant.  I have never heard of potluck weddings until this forum and yet apparently this is a common practice in some circles.
    It may have been rude to you, if you were invited , but luckily for them and you, you were not invited. Whoever was invited actually liked to participate and enjoyed it.

    To be rude by definition means to offend somebody. If nobody is offended and that is the common practice , it is not rude. Like when you wrote  ``Tough titties.`` , to me it is rude. To you it obviously is not. Maybe thats how you talk to eachother in your family and with your friends.

    Emandmeg, congratulations! Your wedding sounds great. I have helped friends with hair, makeup and decorations and loved it. I also loved the compliments for what I did , so I am sure that your guests were not offended and truly enjoyed themselves
    LMFAO this is fucking hysterical. Between you @TiaTea and you, @Bahamabride2015, I can't think of anyone more absurd that I've seen posting this week.

    image

    I hope your crappily-hosted parties were a blast. And I hope you both get new reading glasses soon, and have some money saved up to pay the jeweler when you bust your pearls from clutching them so hard.

    Vic educated you on how not to be a shitty host. She didn't try to educate you on how not to be rude on the internet because that isn't the focus of this fucking board. Have fun, all the best to you both, etc etc.

    @Viczaesar god bless you for making the effort. Some brick walls just won't accept the teachings of good hosting.

  • Stay pressed :D
    --

    I'm the fuck
    out.

    image
  • TiaTea said:
    Viczaesar  ``A wedding is a hosted event.  You invite guests to witness your wedding ceremony, and then you host them with appropriate beverages and food items for the time of day as a thank you to your guests.``

    You are wrong. A wedding is two people getting married. How they celebrate depends entirely on how they and their families and friends feel about it.
    In my circles wedding parties are NOT to thank the guests for watching our ceremonies. A lot of my friends and myself didn´t  even have ceremonies since we are not religious. Are you to tell me that non religious people are not allowed to celebrate? Or is it up to you to tell us how exactly to celebrate?

    If emandmeg is from circles who celebrate weddings with potlucks , your opinion of their way of celebration is irrelevant.  I have never heard of potluck weddings until this forum and yet apparently this is a common practice in some circles.
    It may have been rude to you, if you were invited , but luckily for them and you, you were not invited. Whoever was invited actually liked to participate and enjoyed it.

    To be rude by definition means to offend somebody. If nobody is offended and that is the common practice , it is not rude. Like when you wrote  ``Tough titties.`` , to me it is rude. To you it obviously is not. Maybe thats how you talk to eachother in your family and with your friends.

    Emandmeg, congratulations! Your wedding sounds great. I have helped friends with hair, makeup and decorations and loved it. I also loved the compliments for what I did , so I am sure that your guests were not offended and truly enjoyed themselves
    No, actually, you are wrong, in more ways than one.  A phrase is not inherently rude, and you being offended by it does not make it rude.  You do not get to control what other people say.  A wedding ceremony is about two people getting married.  If you invite anybody to be a guest for that event then you are committing yourself to hosting them properly.  No ifs, ands, or buts.  To do anything else is rude.  There is no time that it is okay to ask your guests to provide the food or beverages for your event.  Ever.  The entire purpose of a reception is to receive your guests - hence the name.



  • Some people are just miserable individuals who take satisfaction from making others miserable too.  This board is not for that, sorry you'll have to find another outlet for your misery.  Your "tough titties" mentality does nothing but make me pity you and those who have to be around you.  Good luck with your sad self... 
    Oh, that is just too funny.  Sorry, sweetcheeks, you still don't get to tell me where and how to post.

    You know what makes me miserable?  People breaking etiquette and treating me like crap.  That sucks.  And that's exactly what I'm trying to help others avoid doing.  If me telling you that you must treat your guests well or not invite any guests at all makes you miserable then clearly you need some misery in your life.  You feel sorry for me?  Well, I feel sorry for your guests.  Clearly you DGAF about their comfort.



  • @TiaTea, this makes no sense to me. You don't have ceremonies?

    "You are wrong. A wedding is two people getting married. How they celebrate depends entirely on how they and their families and friends feel about it.
    In my circles wedding parties are NOT to thank the guests for watching our ceremonies. A lot of my friends and myself didn´t  even have ceremonies since we are not religious. Are you to tell me that non religious people are not allowed to celebrate? Or is it up to you to tell us how exactly to celebrate? "
  • @TiaTea, this makes no sense to me. You don't have ceremonies?


    "You are wrong. A wedding is two people getting married. How they celebrate depends entirely on how they and their families and friends feel about it.
    In my circles wedding parties are NOT to thank the guests for watching our ceremonies. A lot of my friends and myself didn´t  even have ceremonies since we are not religious. Are you to tell me that non religious people are not allowed to celebrate? Or is it up to you to tell us how exactly to celebrate? "
    I was wondering about this too. How does one not have a ceremony?
  • ok, this will invite the wrath of some posters here.   The definition of a reception is the "The action or process of receiving something sent, given, or inflicted." The definition on the Oxford English Dictionary (http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/us/definition/american_english/reception)  goes further to say, with respect to weddings: "A formal social occasion held to welcome someone or to celebrate a particular event:"

    Since the reception is an action or a process, it implies a relationship. So while it is true the party is coordinated by the couple, it can also be seen as their community recognizing them as a new family unit.

    That has been the long-standing purpose of a marriage act. Not only an expression of love (which can take many forms) but a public declaration of their commitment. The reception is for their community (social, religious, political, cultural) to recognize that union.

    It's about the sharing and recognition not about who is hosting over whom. Your community traditions will define the acceptable practices of how that's accomplished.

  • Congrats on your wedding success! It sounds lovely :) Honestly, I think it's silly that some have turned your thread to celebrate a success into a debate but... it doesn't really matter now does it?! I'm new to theknot so IDK if we can, but I'd love to see some pics!
  • Other than the pie thing, it sounds really cool. Do you have any photos? I'd love to see the aisle stump and flower decorations!
    "There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." -Friedrich Nietzsche, "On Reading and Writing"
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