Too cold for outdoor ceremony???

MobKaz · October 2014

pinkrevenge said:

The logistical nightmare of having a comfortable outdoor ceremony that your guests will not hate you for will cost you a fortune.

You will need to rent many outdoor heaters, more than they recommend (because it's never enough, the wind carries the heat away).
Then because outdoor heaters are incredibly noisy, you will need a good sound system if anyone is going to hear your music or your vows.
It would be in your best interests to cut out all readings, unity ceremonies, and rose ceremonies. You will have to run a bare-bones ceremony.
You will have to pay for an insert in your invites that let's people know that the ceremony will be outside and they need to dress for that. There will be some ugly coats in your photos.
It would be in your best interest to provide a small thing of spare blankets, scarves, gloves, pocket warmers (both hand and feet).
It would also be in your best interest to provide a hot drink station, such as mulled cider and hot cocoa.
Be aware that people with young children and the elderly will likely skip the ceremony no matter how many provisions you take.
And also consider that wind could blow away programs, cups from the drink station, the basket of warm items, and people's hair, so it's in your best interest to find a way to block / counter / fight the wind as best you can.

With all that in mind, I really don't see why you would even have an outdoor ceremony that late in the year.

Guests should be honored to share in the day. I want my theme and vision at all costs. Guests can manage because they are used to the cold. They should all be fine because it will not be unbearable since it will only be a 10 minute ceremony. It is my day and I can go for it. None of your scenarios will happen because my day will be perfect.

Does that about cover it?

[Deleted User] · October 2014

[Deleted User] · October 2014

beethery · October 2014

I wouldn't make my grandparents stand outside in s temperature below 70 for any amount of time beyond them leaving their car and entering the building. Be nice to your old folks if you have a relationship with them. They'll appreciate your concern for their comfort on 'your big special day.'

klk111415 · October 2014

Viczaesar said:

kk111415 said:

I'm not sure what you mean by "NY Metro" area but I live in the Bronx and work in Manhattan. Have you felt it outside today? I had my AC on last night. You can't say that it's too cold. It's been in the 70's and wearing a light jacket is even unbearable. Yes it's mid October but the weather is all over the place. You can't predict anything.

September 5th is still summer. Children won't even be back in school yet. Labor day is the 7th. My friend got married on August 31st and wanted a fall theme but it was 90 degrees and so humid that a bridesmaid passed during the ceremony from the heat. She decided against the fall theme. Fall doesn't even begin until September 21st. Although I would love to say that you can start white girl freaking out about fall on September 1st- you can't. The leaves are still green, fall favorites aren't even out. I couldn't even get a darn pumpkin beer a few days before the official start of fall- and I live for pumpkin everything.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/laraparker/things-all-basic-white-girls-do-during-the-fall#4ih516l

If you choose the 5th you will get the added benefit of having an extra day off from work (on the 7th) but on the other hand you may have friends and family traveling for the holiday. The sun will still be high in the sky and it will be warm. The sun sets at 7:23pm that day.

If you choose the October date, you would get the added benefit of it actually feeling like fall. Travel for your guests is much cheaper (it won't be a holiday weekend). You can run with your fall theme with apples, pumpkins, mums, gords, fall colors and leaves. The sun will be setting at the most beautiful time of day and it's the best time to take pictures. See how you feel in a couple of weeks and check the temperature. You may be surprised that it's not as cold as people say it's going to be. And I don't get why people think your guests are going to be suffering. You aren't making them sit outside in subzero weather. Maybe a slight chill to the air but nothing unbearable. YOU might be cold, but hell- you are marrying the love of your life- I think you will be so excited you won't even notice. Leave a note in your invitation that tells your guests you will be having an outdoor ceremony. They will come prepared and if they don't you can have a back up plan by offering pashminas. Or look into renting propane heaters. There are so many solutions that will allow you to have what you want and make your guests comfortable. Be creative.

What the fuck? "White girl freaking out"? HATE.

It was a joke based on the buzzfeed article I posted which I find extremely funny... and it's totally making fun of myself. Calm yourself, darling.

klk111415 · October 2014

This discussion had nothing to do about me, and everything to do with the girl who started the discussion because she wanted to know if she could have her outdoor ceremony in late October. Can she? Sure. I find a ceremony where everyone is bundled up for a short time, (the same amount of time some people have to stand outside waiting for their train in their work clothes) not that different than forcing your guests to sit outside in the unbearable heat because you wanted your perfect summer outdoor ceremony. I was at a wedding where a bridesmaid literally passed out during a 30 minute ceremony. I spent another ceremony getting a nasty burn on my shoulder from being outside in the sun for just 15 minutes in early May. You can all complain and tell me off for putting my guests need second- but I'm not. And the girl who started this discussion also wouldn't be putting her guests needs second. My guests as I said a million times, will be well informed. They aren't going to show up in short cocktail dress with nothing to cover them. And from the guests I have already spoken to, including family and friends, they all are fine with it. I will consider my options and choose the most appropriate one when the time comes. But thanks for all of your concern!

Maggie0829 · October 2014

kk111415 said:

This discussion had nothing to do about me, and everything to do with the girl who started the discussion because she wanted to know if she could have her outdoor ceremony in late October. Can she? Sure. I find a ceremony where everyone is bundled up for a short time, (the same amount of time some people have to stand outside waiting for their train in their work clothes) not that different than forcing your guests to sit outside in the unbearable heat because you wanted your perfect summer outdoor ceremony. I was at a wedding where a bridesmaid literally passed out during a 30 minute ceremony. I spent another ceremony getting a nasty burn on my shoulder from being outside in the sun for just 15 minutes in early May. You can all complain and tell me off for putting my guests need second- but I'm not. And the girl who started this discussion also wouldn't be putting her guests needs second. My guests as I said a million times, will be well informed. They aren't going to show up in short cocktail dress with nothing to cover them. And from the guests I have already spoken to, including family and friends, they all are fine with it. I will consider my options and choose the most appropriate one when the time comes. But thanks for all of your concern!

We would tell any bride that wants to have their wedding in the dead of summer outside because it is their "vision," but they live in AZ to take it inside. If you live in an area where it gets fucking hot as hell then you need to realize that an outside wedding is not possible. Same if you are having a fall wedding and live where it gets pretty darn chilly. I live in MD and woke up to frost on the ground and 37 degree temperatures. It would still be too damn cold at 11:30 to have a wedding outside. So needless to say it will be too damn cold in mid-November to have a wedding outside in MD let alone in NY. Suck it up and move everything inside.

And if I have to stand around for train in the cold for work I deal with it because that job is giving me a paycheck. Your wedding is not funding my livelihood.

climbingsingle · October 2014

kk111415 said:

This discussion had nothing to do about me, and everything to do with the girl who started the discussion because she wanted to know if she could have her outdoor ceremony in late October. Can she? Sure. I find a ceremony where everyone is bundled up for a short time, (the same amount of time some people have to stand outside waiting for their train in their work clothes) not that different than forcing your guests to sit outside in the unbearable heat because you wanted your perfect summer outdoor ceremony. I was at a wedding where a bridesmaid literally passed out during a 30 minute ceremony. I spent another ceremony getting a nasty burn on my shoulder from being outside in the sun for just 15 minutes in early May. You can all complain and tell me off for putting my guests need second- but I'm not. And the girl who started this discussion also wouldn't be putting her guests needs second. My guests as I said a million times, will be well informed. They aren't going to show up in short cocktail dress with nothing to cover them. And from the guests I have already spoken to, including family and friends, they all are fine with it. I will consider my options and choose the most appropriate one when the time comes. But thanks for all of your concern!

Yes, and you chimed in saying you were forcing your guests to sit outside in mid-November.

Just because people have been rude to their guests before does not make it OK. I'd be telling a bride having an August wedding the same thing. Your guests' comfort should come first. They shouldn't be suffering through extreme temperatures just because you have some silly vision of how your ceremony needs to go.

No one is going to tell you to your face that plan is terrible. You're getting 100% real and honest advice here. And I'm telling you (as other people are too), you will have pissed off guests.

beethery · October 2014

kk111415 said:

This discussion had nothing to do about me, and everything to do with the girl who started the discussion because she wanted to know if she could have her outdoor ceremony in late October. Can she? Sure. I find a ceremony where everyone is bundled up for a short time, (the same amount of time some people have to stand outside waiting for their train in their work clothes) not that different than forcing your guests to sit outside in the unbearable heat because you wanted your perfect summer outdoor ceremony. I was at a wedding where a bridesmaid literally passed out during a 30 minute ceremony. I spent another ceremony getting a nasty burn on my shoulder from being outside in the sun for just 15 minutes in early May. You can all complain and tell me off for putting my guests need second- but I'm not. And the girl who started this discussion also wouldn't be putting her guests needs second. My guests as I said a million times, will be well informed. They aren't going to show up in short cocktail dress with nothing to cover them. And from the guests I have already spoken to, including family and friends, they all are fine with it. I will consider my options and choose the most appropriate one when the time comes. But thanks for all of your concern!

Friends and family will blow smoke up your ass because they love you. We, strangers on the internet (who you didn't want input from but then posted your plan on the internet for critique, lol that's a good one!), do not love you, so we will not be participating in smoke signals up your b-hole.

Get with the fuckin' program or mosey.

klk111415 · October 2014

Alright, alright. Calm yourselves. Some of you girls are already happily married and still lurking on here to give every last bit of input into something because you have nothing better to do. It's kind of funny.

As I said a million and ONE times, I will make the appropriate decision the day of my wedding. I'm not counting on the outdoor ceremony, and not planning the indoor ceremony. I'm still over a year away and I think I can figure all those details out once I'm a little closer to that date. I'm just excited to have a lot of stuff already checked off my list and really can't wait to marry my wonderful fiance. Can we all agree that THAT's the most important part? The wedding is going to be just one day, the marriage is for the rest of your life. I have way more to worry about in my life than a 10 minute ceremony. It will all come together in the end.

climbingsingle · October 2014

kk111415 said:

Alright, alright. Calm yourselves. Some of you girls are already happily married and still lurking on here to give every last bit of input into something because you have nothing better to do. It's kind of funny.

As I said a million and ONE times, I will make the appropriate decision the day of my wedding. I'm not counting on the outdoor ceremony, and not planning the indoor ceremony. I'm still over a year away and I think I can figure all those details out once I'm a little closer to that date. I'm just excited to have a lot of stuff already checked off my list and really can't wait to marry my wonderful fiance. Can we all agree that THAT's the most important part? The wedding is going to be just one day, the marriage is for the rest of your life. I have way more to worry about in my life than a 10 minute ceremony. It will all come together in the end.

Yes, there are lots of us old married hags still here. Imagine that. Would you rather get advice from someone who hasn't been through all of it yet, or advice from someone that planned their wedding and had it already happen? Say you're traveling to Italy. Would you like travel tips from someone that's been to Italy, or someone that has never left the country?

Maggie0829 · October 2014

kk111415 said:

Alright, alright. Calm yourselves. Some of you girls are already happily married and still lurking on here to give every last bit of input into something because you have nothing better to do. It's kind of funny.

As I said a million and ONE times, I will make the appropriate decision the day of my wedding. I'm not counting on the outdoor ceremony, and not planning the indoor ceremony. I'm still over a year away and I think I can figure all those details out once I'm a little closer to that date. I'm just excited to have a lot of stuff already checked off my list and really can't wait to marry my wonderful fiance. Can we all agree that THAT's the most important part? The wedding is going to be just one day, the marriage is for the rest of your life. I have way more to worry about in my life than a 10 minute ceremony. It will all come together in the end.

Wow, never heard that one before. You sure are original in your snide comments.

You still aren't putting the comfort of your guests first. Yes, you are marrying the man of your dreams and that is the most important part...to YOU. But you need to consider those that you are inviting to see this wonderful occassion. They should be comfortable, not shivering in their coats for 30 minutes (yes, 30 since you can't just count the length of your ceremony...you also need to take into account that people will arrive 15+ minutes prior the start time).

If you had really wanted an outdoor ceremony then you should have picked a date in late spring, early summer or super early fall. But any time past mid-October and the wedding needs to be inside (unless of course you live in the South or elsewhere whether the weather is gorgeous at that time of year).

beethery · October 2014

kk111415 said:

Alright, alright. Calm yourselves. Some of you girls are already happily married and still lurking on here to give every last bit of input into something because you have nothing better to do. It's kind of funny.

As I said a million and ONE times, I will make the appropriate decision the day of my wedding. I'm not counting on the outdoor ceremony, and not planning the indoor ceremony. I'm still over a year away and I think I can figure all those details out once I'm a little closer to that date. I'm just excited to have a lot of stuff already checked off my list and really can't wait to marry my wonderful fiance. Can we all agree that THAT's the most important part? The wedding is going to be just one day, the marriage is for the rest of your life. I have way more to worry about in my life than a 10 minute ceremony. It will all come together in the end.

Not married yet, don't get it twisted. Also a mod, so I have to spend time on these boards, got it?

The most important thing besides you getting married on your wedding date, is that if you invite people, you have to accommodate them correctly and make sure they're comfortable. How many times do WE need to repeat that? Fuck's sake.

For someone who doesn't care ~~~soooooo much, you seem to spend an awful lot of time responding to input you don't care about on a post you didn't even write (and therefore aren't getting notifications about)

Be nice to your god damn guests or don't have any. It is super simple.

klk111415 · October 2014

Well, I think you all have done a good job, and have made very valid points. I am definitely taking your suggestions into consideration. Sorry for the dumb comments I made- I guess it's hard when you have this vision and you realize it's not going to work as planned. I just didn't think that playing it by ear is such a bad idea. Yes, I might need to have an indoor ceremony, and I'm coming to terms with that. I chose the month I did for the reason that Octoberfest goes on at the park near my location and it's a mad house (I'm taking pictures there and it's so packed that the traffic could be back up for over an hour). I also got the most amazing deal for putting off my wedding a month. Travel for my guests will also be significantly cheaper.

klk111415 · October 2014

esstee33 · October 2014

kk111415 said:

Well, I think you all have done a good job, and have made very valid points. I am definitely taking your suggestions into consideration. Sorry for the dumb comments I made- I guess it's hard when you have this vision and you realize it's not going to work as planned. I just didn't think that playing it by ear is such a bad idea. Yes, I might need to have an indoor ceremony, and I'm coming to terms with that. I chose the month I did for the reason that Octoberfest goes on at the park near my location and it's a mad house (I'm taking pictures there and it's so packed that the traffic could be back up for over an hour). I also got the most amazing deal for putting off my wedding a month. Travel for my guests will also be significantly cheaper.

All anyone is trying to do is help you to maintain your "vision" without forgetting that this is an event you are hosting people at and, as such, you need to remember that even though your wedding is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING EVRRRRR for you, it's not for them. It's 10 minutes that they might have to sit outside in the cold because you think they should be fine. That's not your call to make. It's good that you'd be prepared with heaters, but even so, I know which heaters you're talking about, and I've been cold on restaurant patios in the fall even when I was sitting immediately next to one.

I think it was @AprilH81 who said somewhere earlier in the thread that an outdoor ceremony is still totally possible, but that needs to be your Plan B in case of perfect weather. Plan A should be to have it inside, because more likely than not it's going to be way too cold to have it outside. Sorry, toots.

esstee33 · October 2014

kk111415 said:

Viczaesar said:

kk111415 said:

I'm not sure what you mean by "NY Metro" area but I live in the Bronx and work in Manhattan. Have you felt it outside today? I had my AC on last night. You can't say that it's too cold. It's been in the 70's and wearing a light jacket is even unbearable. Yes it's mid October but the weather is all over the place. You can't predict anything.

September 5th is still summer. Children won't even be back in school yet. Labor day is the 7th. My friend got married on August 31st and wanted a fall theme but it was 90 degrees and so humid that a bridesmaid passed during the ceremony from the heat. She decided against the fall theme. Fall doesn't even begin until September 21st. Although I would love to say that you can start white girl freaking out about fall on September 1st- you can't. The leaves are still green, fall favorites aren't even out. I couldn't even get a darn pumpkin beer a few days before the official start of fall- and I live for pumpkin everything.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/laraparker/things-all-basic-white-girls-do-during-the-fall#4ih516l

If you choose the 5th you will get the added benefit of having an extra day off from work (on the 7th) but on the other hand you may have friends and family traveling for the holiday. The sun will still be high in the sky and it will be warm. The sun sets at 7:23pm that day.

If you choose the October date, you would get the added benefit of it actually feeling like fall. Travel for your guests is much cheaper (it won't be a holiday weekend). You can run with your fall theme with apples, pumpkins, mums, gords, fall colors and leaves. The sun will be setting at the most beautiful time of day and it's the best time to take pictures. See how you feel in a couple of weeks and check the temperature. You may be surprised that it's not as cold as people say it's going to be. And I don't get why people think your guests are going to be suffering. You aren't making them sit outside in subzero weather. Maybe a slight chill to the air but nothing unbearable. YOU might be cold, but hell- you are marrying the love of your life- I think you will be so excited you won't even notice. Leave a note in your invitation that tells your guests you will be having an outdoor ceremony. They will come prepared and if they don't you can have a back up plan by offering pashminas. Or look into renting propane heaters. There are so many solutions that will allow you to have what you want and make your guests comfortable. Be creative.

What the fuck? "White girl freaking out"? HATE.

It was a joke based on the buzzfeed article I posted which I find extremely funny... and it's totally making fun of myself. Calm yourself, darling.

This is bullshit racism just like any other stereotype, and it's not funny. Just because it's against yourself doesn't make it not racist, and lots of other people don't appreciate being pigeonholed into racist stereotypes.

klk111415 · October 2014

Thanks, @esstee33 . I totally get it and all I can do now is wait to see what happens the day of. I won't be making anyone suffer, that's not what I'd like to do. I'm going to talk to the catering manager about all of the options for ceremony. I saw that one couple had their ceremony under the heated tent structure I had mentioned. It's where the cocktail hour is held (and it's weather proof so it's used year round and can be totally heated even in a snow storm).

To give you an idea of the area I'm working with: the venue was features on the show Four Weddings.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zdMSSt--v98

The open area for cocktail hour would have walls rather than being open, but I don't have pictures with the walls in place.

esstee33 · October 2014

kk111415 said:

Thanks, @esstee33 . I totally get it and all I can do now is wait to see what happens the day of. I won't be making anyone suffer, that's not what I'd like to do. I'm going to talk to the catering manager about all of the options for ceremony. I saw that one couple had their ceremony under the heated tent structure I had mentioned. It's where the cocktail hour is held (and it's weather proof so it's used year round and can be totally heated even in a snow storm).

To give you an idea of the area I'm working with: the venue was features on the show Four Weddings.

The open area for cocktail hour would have walls rather than being open, but I don't have pictures with the walls in place.

I can't watch the video at work, but I'll check it out later.

If the tent is well-heated and protected from the elements, that seems like a fair compromise.

Knottie30291358 · October 2014

I'd say there are certain points where guests have certain expectations and adults. Being able to dress oneself is one of those points. If it's too cold to be outside in a coat, the region clearly isn't habitable and I have no idea how you found a venue.

Maggie0829 · October 2014

Knottie30291358 said:

I'd say there are certain points where guests have certain expectations and adults. Being able to dress oneself is one of those points. If it's too cold to be outside in a coat, the region clearly isn't habitable and I have no idea how you found a venue.

And as an adult who can dress herself just fine in cold weather, I do still expect to not have to stand outside for a period of time just because you had a vision of an outdoor wedding in November in NY. Just because I may love you does not mean that I will be happy with you because you made me stand outside when it was cold for your wedding ceremony.

And sorry to say it can get to the point that just a coat is not enough to keep me feeling warm when it is super cold outside, especially when I am in a cocktail dress with my bare legs out in the air..you know a typical dress worn to a wedding.

climbingsingle · October 2014

Knottie30291358 said:

I'd say there are certain points where guests have certain expectations and adults. Being able to dress oneself is one of those points. If it's too cold to be outside in a coat, the region clearly isn't habitable and I have no idea how you found a venue.

This doesn't even make any sense. I have lots of warm coats. That doesn't mean I want to have to sit outside in my coat and dress for 20 minutes when it's 45 degrees. Unless you're telling me I should wear my ski pants and a hat.

klk111415 · October 2014

Ski pants in 45 degrees is a little overkill. I'm an avid skier and I would be sweating in that. I was outside yesterday in upstate New York (almost near Albany) and it was 52 and with the sun shining it was actually beautiful in a pair of leggings and a sweater. Once the sun set though, and I was back in NYC, I found 50 degrees to be a little too chilly if you don't have a pair of jeans on and a jacket (I was in a leather jacket, though and I felt fine). It's all relative though, of course and everyone is different. Most of my fiance's family are smokers so they will end up spending much longer than 10 minutes outside at a time, as they usually do during family events. And having the heaters might be necessary anyway if they are outside getting away from the music to socialize.

beethery · October 2014

Knottie30291358 said:

I'd say there are certain points where guests have certain expectations and adults. Being able to dress oneself is one of those points. If it's too cold to be outside in a coat, the region clearly isn't habitable and I have no idea how you found a venue.

I live in New England. I am not native to the area. I do not hang out outdoors unless it's over 70. If I'm outside, I'm walking from my car to wherever I drove out for, or my house/place of work is on fire. Alright? I don't do cold well but by golly, here I am.

I am getting married at 5pm on 10/10/15. This year, on that date, the high was 65 degrees F, the leaves were gorgeous, and it was bright and breezy all day. It was 45 degrees at 9am that day. and obviously significantly cooler that evening.

My grandparents can't deal with the cold. I would be a fucking douchebag if I made them dick around for my ~*special day*~ just because I want to have my ceremony surrounded by natures bounty out in the gorgeous leaves and shit. My pictures and the magical fucking atmosphere are not more important than the comfort of the people I care about since I invited them to come all the way up from GA to watch me get married.

That's nice and all, but if I want to have people at my wedding, I need to make sure they're comfortable. What part of this is so hard to understand?

For the record, I got a really nice town hall with humongous windows and really nice views for any guests who want to look at the leaves and enjoy the heated fucking room. BE NICE TO YOUR GUESTS OR DON'T HAVE ANY.

klk111415 · October 2014

beethery said:

Knottie30291358 said:

I'd say there are certain points where guests have certain expectations and adults. Being able to dress oneself is one of those points. If it's too cold to be outside in a coat, the region clearly isn't habitable and I have no idea how you found a venue.

I live in New England. I am not native to the area. I do not hang out outdoors unless it's over 70. If I'm outside, I'm walking from my car to wherever I drove out for, or my house/place of work is on fire. Alright? I don't do cold well but by golly, here I am.

I am getting married at 5pm on 10/10/15. This year, on that date, the high was 65 degrees F, the leaves were gorgeous, and it was bright and breezy all day. It was 45 degrees at 9am that day. and obviously significantly cooler that evening.

My grandparents can't deal with the cold. I would be a fucking douchebag if I made them dick around for my ~*special day*~ just because I want to have my ceremony surrounded by natures bounty out in the gorgeous leaves and shit. My pictures and the magical fucking atmosphere are not more important than the comfort of the people I care about since I invited them to come all the way up from GA to watch me get married.

That's nice and all, but if I want to have people at my wedding, I need to make sure they're comfortable. What part of this is so hard to understand?

For the record, I got a really nice town hall with humongous windows and really nice views for any guests who want to look at the leaves and enjoy the heated fucking room. BE NICE TO YOUR GUESTS OR DON'T HAVE ANY.

You need to calm down a bit, there's no need to talk trashy like that to people you don't even know. You can get your point across without cursing and being rude- and people will take you much more seriously. But your response is laughable.

I really hope for your sake you aren't staying in New England. I'm a true native and I strongly appreciate all that it has to offer. The seasons are what makes it such a wonderful place to live in. But if you can't handle it, I would try to move south where you can enjoy yourself a little more. You are pretty much saying you are stuck inside between October and May. This isn't the place for you. That's in no way an insult or me trying to be mean, just the truth.

That being said, you aren't the best person to reply on this topic since you have such an extreme view. I'm personally working with a bunch of New England natives who don't experience the high sensitivity to mildly cold temperatures like you do. If I was inviting a bunch of people from the South, I would totally be sympathetic to the temperature change for them.

lyndausvi · October 2014

I dreamed of a beach wedding. It's what I always wanted. I was even living in the islands at the time. We choose to have our wedding in Sept on a beach in NJ to both make it easier on our families and to avoid hurricanes.

Guess what hit on my wedding day? In NEW JERSEY!!! Yep, a fucking storm. Everything had to moved inside a tent. A tent only rated for up to 65 mph winds (winds were up to 60mph). A tent that collapsed the morning of the wedding. Now because I'm realistic everything was great. I didn't cry or get upset. No need I had a back-up plan in case something like this happened.

I'm all for outdoor weddings, but one needs to realistic in those plans. The weather the first week of Nov in NYC is a crap shoot. It can be 80 or 40. It can be sunny or a nor'easter can hit. It's one of those times of year that is hard to predict. By choosing that time of year you have to be flexible. You need to have a backup plan. You need to be realistic that those plans might have to be used.

klk111415 · October 2014

lyndausvi said:

I dreamed of a beach wedding. It's what I always wanted. I was even living in the islands at the time. We choose to have our wedding in Sept on a beach in NJ to both make it easier on our families and to avoid hurricanes.

Guess what hit on my wedding day? In NEW JERSEY!!! Yep, a fucking storm. Everything had to moved inside a tent. A tent only rated for up to 65 mph winds (winds were up to 60mph). A tent that collapsed the morning of the wedding. Now because I'm realistic everything was great. I didn't cry or get upset. No need I had a back-up plan in case something like this happened.

I'm all for outdoor weddings, but one needs to realistic in those plans. The weather the first week of Nov in NYC is a crap shoot. It can be 80 or 40. It can be sunny or a nor'easter can hit. It's one of those times of year that is hard to predict. By choosing that time of year you have to be flexible. You need to have a backup plan. You need to be realistic that those plans might have to be used.

So sorry to hear that a storm hit, but you have an amazing attitude! Yeah, you really can't predict the weather and being prepared with back up plans is a must. Just a couple of years ago I attended a wedding in late October when we had that freak snow storm that took branches (with leaves!) down and made a huge mess. The bride totally kept her cool throughout the day.

esstee33 · October 2014

kk111415 said:

beethery said:

Knottie30291358 said:

I'd say there are certain points where guests have certain expectations and adults. Being able to dress oneself is one of those points. If it's too cold to be outside in a coat, the region clearly isn't habitable and I have no idea how you found a venue.

I live in New England. I am not native to the area. I do not hang out outdoors unless it's over 70. If I'm outside, I'm walking from my car to wherever I drove out for, or my house/place of work is on fire. Alright? I don't do cold well but by golly, here I am.

I am getting married at 5pm on 10/10/15. This year, on that date, the high was 65 degrees F, the leaves were gorgeous, and it was bright and breezy all day. It was 45 degrees at 9am that day. and obviously significantly cooler that evening.

My grandparents can't deal with the cold. I would be a fucking douchebag if I made them dick around for my ~*special day*~ just because I want to have my ceremony surrounded by natures bounty out in the gorgeous leaves and shit. My pictures and the magical fucking atmosphere are not more important than the comfort of the people I care about since I invited them to come all the way up from GA to watch me get married.

That's nice and all, but if I want to have people at my wedding, I need to make sure they're comfortable. What part of this is so hard to understand?

For the record, I got a really nice town hall with humongous windows and really nice views for any guests who want to look at the leaves and enjoy the heated fucking room. BE NICE TO YOUR GUESTS OR DON'T HAVE ANY.

You need to calm down a bit, there's no need to talk trashy like that to people you don't even know. You can get your point across without cursing and being rude- and people will take you much more seriously. But your response is laughable.

I really hope for your sake you aren't staying in New England. I'm a true native and I strongly appreciate all that it has to offer. The seasons are what makes it such a wonderful place to live in. But if you can't handle it, I would try to move south where you can enjoy yourself a little more. You are pretty much saying you are stuck inside between October and May. This isn't the place for you. That's in no way an insult or me trying to be mean, just the truth.

That being said, you aren't the best person to reply on this topic since you have such an extreme view. I'm personally working with a bunch of New England natives who don't experience the high sensitivity to mildly cold temperatures like you do. If I was inviting a bunch of people from the South, I would totally be sympathetic to the temperature change for them.

Hahahahaha. Oh sweet Jesus.

Lady, you need to calm the fuck down and stop telling people how to post. You also need to stop assuming that just because YOU would be fine with a certain temperature / weather whatever, that every single one of your guests will also be. You were doing SO WELL there for a second. I really thought you were starting to understand that it's not all about you.

Just because @beethery is from the South and finds New England weather too cold for her liking doesn't mean she's the only one. I would be MISERABLE in the conditions you're probably going to end up having, patio heaters or not. And I've lived in Ohio my entire life, excluding one summer in Wyoming. It's like mid-50s outside right now and I'm FUCKING FREEZING MY TITS OFF. And I'm dressed appropriately for the weather! Stop this horseshit.

ETA: there's a big goddamn difference between living in a climate that doesn't suit you and being forced to sit out in the cold because some pretty princess needs her special outside wedding in November, for fucks sake.

sophhabobopha · October 2014

kk111415 said:

beethery said:

Knottie30291358 said:

I'd say there are certain points where guests have certain expectations and adults. Being able to dress oneself is one of those points. If it's too cold to be outside in a coat, the region clearly isn't habitable and I have no idea how you found a venue.

I live in New England. I am not native to the area. I do not hang out outdoors unless it's over 70. If I'm outside, I'm walking from my car to wherever I drove out for, or my house/place of work is on fire. Alright? I don't do cold well but by golly, here I am.

I am getting married at 5pm on 10/10/15. This year, on that date, the high was 65 degrees F, the leaves were gorgeous, and it was bright and breezy all day. It was 45 degrees at 9am that day. and obviously significantly cooler that evening.

My grandparents can't deal with the cold. I would be a fucking douchebag if I made them dick around for my ~*special day*~ just because I want to have my ceremony surrounded by natures bounty out in the gorgeous leaves and shit. My pictures and the magical fucking atmosphere are not more important than the comfort of the people I care about since I invited them to come all the way up from GA to watch me get married.

That's nice and all, but if I want to have people at my wedding, I need to make sure they're comfortable. What part of this is so hard to understand?

For the record, I got a really nice town hall with humongous windows and really nice views for any guests who want to look at the leaves and enjoy the heated fucking room. BE NICE TO YOUR GUESTS OR DON'T HAVE ANY.

You need to calm down a bit, there's no need to talk trashy like that to people you don't even know. You can get your point across without cursing and being rude- and people will take you much more seriously. But your response is laughable.

I really hope for your sake you aren't staying in New England. I'm a true native and I strongly appreciate all that it has to offer. The seasons are what makes it such a wonderful place to live in. But if you can't handle it, I would try to move south where you can enjoy yourself a little more. You are pretty much saying you are stuck inside between October and May. This isn't the place for you. That's in no way an insult or me trying to be mean, just the truth.

That being said, you aren't the best person to reply on this topic since you have such an extreme view. I'm personally working with a bunch of New England natives who don't experience the high sensitivity to mildly cold temperatures like you do. If I was inviting a bunch of people from the South, I would totally be sympathetic to the temperature change for them.

Hahahahahahahahahaha, fucking really?

Too cold for outdoor ceremony???

Re: Too cold for outdoor ceremony???

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