Wedding vision

JoanE2012 · November 2014

AddieCake said:

I had one and didn't have to make any cuts to achieve it. The day was exactly what we wanted.

This. I think most people have a vision. Most people here say it's that your guests are treated well, etc. In my eyes, that's a given. But beyond that.....the actual day, how things are going to look.....the venue, the decor, the music, the food, etc......yeah, I had a vision. If I didn't, I'm quite sure the planning process wouldn't have gone as smoothly. (Or maybe it would've gone better since I wouldn't have had any preferences, who knows!) Fortunately, through proper planning, we were able to make it all work. I had exactly what I had envisioned. And the guests were treated well and had a kickass time.

mrs4everhart · November 2014

We had a vision: tropical beach, close family and friends, laid back, chill, great food, even better tequila, Cuban cigars, dancing, laughter.

All were achieved. Nothing was "cut" to make way for anything else. We prioritized so that wasn't an issue. It was perfect and probably better in a lot of ways than we could have planned for.

Hosting people properly and showing them a great time does not have to run counter with executing one's vision/theme/ideas/whatever-you-label-it. Sure, we could get caught up in words but I think this whole theme/vision thing is really about a couple applying their personal style to their wedding. Some people are fussy, some people not so much. There's outdoorsy types and city dwellers and a million other types of people. And if they weren't all making their weddings as much of a personal reflection as possible weddings would become extremely boring pretty quickly.

snarkymaid · November 2014

beethery said:

I also had to give up my vision of having Latrice Royale officiate the ceremony as I don't think it would be feasible to get her certified in my state.

I think it's time to test just how far "Live Free or Die" goes...

Signed,
A former New Hampshirite

ETA: Not trying to be a creepy stalker - I'm a lurker and have seen you reference NH several times.

beethery · November 2014

snarkymaid said:

beethery said:

I also had to give up my vision of having Latrice Royale officiate the ceremony as I don't think it would be feasible to get her certified in my state.

I think it's time to test just how far "Live Free or Die" goes...

Signed,
A former New Hampshirite

ETA: Not trying to be a creepy stalker - I'm a lurker and have seen you reference NH several times.

If she's got a church affiliation she could do it here without having to get a separate state certification. I've looked into it.

I also already booked an officiant for, what I imagine to be, considerably cheaper than what Miss Royale would cost. I would LOOOOOOOOOOVE to have her do it, I'd just have to make cuts on other things. I'll see her next time she comes to Boston.

CMGragain · November 2014

Interesting! My only vision was to get married in a white dress in a church. My mother chose my colors. My FMIL chose almost everything else. I just tried to duck and keep out of the line of fire.

beethery · November 2014

CMGragain said:

Interesting! My only vision was to get married in a white dress in a church. My mother chose my colors. My FMIL chose almost everything else. I just tried to duck and keep out of the line of fire.

I'm not about to become part of the pavement to pacify others, and that mindset applies to everything, not just the wedding.

CMGragain · November 2014

beethery said:

CMGragain said:

Interesting! My only vision was to get married in a white dress in a church. My mother chose my colors. My FMIL chose almost everything else. I just tried to duck and keep out of the line of fire.

I'm not about to become part of the pavement to pacify others, and that mindset applies to everything, not just the wedding.

Yes, I agree. If I had really let everybody have their way, the wedding would have been cancelled. My FMIL was trying her best to bring that about, She found out she was gaining a daughter-in-law who was stronger than she was. I pick my battles.

VulgarGirl · November 2014

First I have to say, everytime I hear "wedding vision" I think of when Phoebe on Charmed would get her "visions" and picture brides touching something wedding related and having a flash a demon attacking if they use that thing.

Second, we had a vision for our wedding. Or, what did I use a lot, feel. We wanted a "feel" or a "vibe", and I think we pulled it off. Colors we liked, food we loved, booze, a big kick ass party. We were the ones writing the checks so we got to pick what we wanted and where we wanted to spend our money.

I knew I really wanted an evening wedding. That cost more, but I didn't give a shit about a fancy dress, so I spent less there. Give and take, it's all part of being a grown up.

ETA: Third, (I remebered the third thing!) I get super pissed about the "bride's vision". Excuse me, but there is a second person getting married. Shall we not consult them? Be they the other bride or the groom? Or two grooms? My guy friends are way more into getting married then my girl friends. It's not just about one person here, even if she's in the big white dress, the other person gets to weigh in too.

lacqueredlover · November 2014

@beethery if RuPaul would officiate my wedding, I think I would die of happiness. I love me some Latrice Motherfucking Royale though!

VulgarGirl · November 2014

@lacqueredlover and @beethery we came thisclose to have one of favorite local drag queens (who si also a friend) officiate our wedding. She was totally down with it, but ended up just being really busy leading up to our wedding and didn't think she could give it the attention it deserved.

She did give an AMAZING toast though.

So moral of the story, if you can invite a drag queen, do. Invite several.

lacqueredlover · November 2014

MagicInk said:

@lacqueredlover and @beethery we came thisclose to have one of favorite local drag queens (who si also a friend) officiate our wedding. She was totally down with it, but ended up just being really busy leading up to our wedding and didn't think she could give it the attention it deserved.

She did give an AMAZING toast though.

So moral of the story, if you can invite a drag queen, do. Invite several.

SITB Damnit!

My one drag queen friend kinda fell out of my life (a straight male drag queen, it was interesting) but I seriously wish I had more drag queen friends. I think they are amazing

CMGragain · November 2014

My daughter had her bachelorette party at a drag queen bar in DC. I wasn't invited. (Sigh!) I understand she passed for one of them, given that she is six feet tall, and wore a scarf around her neck. She gave herself away when she ordered a cosmopolitan. The ladies were very nice to her, invited her up on stage, and congratulated her.

mikenberger · November 2014

CMGragain said:
Interesting! My only vision was to get married in a white dress in a church. My mother chose my colors. My FMIL chose almost everything else. I just tried to duck and keep out of the line of fire.

Reading this and "knowing" you from your postings on the boards... I can't believe you'd ever be a pacifist lol

abbyj700 · November 2014

We formed a vision throughout our planning and very much reached it - sacrificing nothing when it comes to the comfort of our guests. Actually - one of the things I'm known for is how over the top my parties typically are. So in my true style - we had too much booze and way too much food. We had a very classy event with foods from around the world - offset by center pieces made from recycled Jack Daniels bottles. Country and 80's rock rang from the venue as half the guests smoked out on the cigar lounge veranda.

There seriously isn't a thing I would change. And our vision and "theme" was to be nothing more than us- a little country, a little trashy, a little fancy - and WAY TOO MUCH! It was one hell of a party! :-)

d&bbride2015 · November 2014

beethery said:

Yeah. Big drunk dance party with good food, tons of booze, handheld serious business confetti poppers, and good music.

As long as everyone shows up, shouldn't be an issue. Confetti poppers are getting purchased in a couple weeks.

I had to forgo the champagne bottle-shaped poppers for regular ones so that I would not feel like a dick about the cost efficiency of radness.

my Dj offers confetti blast!. I called the venue to make sure it was all good to have it and the woman said absolutely not!!! WHAT?? Blasphemy! I bet you get amazing photos when you start popping confetti!!! your wedding sounds like its going to be awesome!!!!

CMGragain · November 2014

mikenberger said:

Interesting! My only vision was to get married in a white dress in a church. My mother chose my colors. My FMIL chose almost everything else. I just tried to duck and keep out of the line of fire.
Reading this and "knowing" you from your postings on the boards... I can't believe you'd ever be a pacifist lol

My FMIL was doing everything possible to stop the wedding from happening at all. She offered me money to not marry her son. DH was 1100 miles away, and had no idea how much drama was happening. I almost jumped on a plane and eloped. I did stick it out. I won.
I didn't really get to do much planning on my own wedding, and I really enjoyed helping daughter with hers (which was drama free). Maybe that is why I hang out and try to help you younger ladies on The Knot.

beethery · November 2014

Danielle0413 said:

beethery said:

Yeah. Big drunk dance party with good food, tons of booze, handheld serious business confetti poppers, and good music.

As long as everyone shows up, shouldn't be an issue. Confetti poppers are getting purchased in a couple weeks.

I had to forgo the champagne bottle-shaped poppers for regular ones so that I would not feel like a dick about the cost efficiency of radness.

my Dj offers confetti blast!. I called the venue to make sure it was all good to have it and the woman said absolutely not!!! WHAT?? Blasphemy! I bet you get amazing photos when you start popping confetti!!! your wedding sounds like its going to be awesome!!!!

I feel like carpeted venues, or places where they do the cleanup are the ones who aren't down with that. Makes sense, if it is a bit of a downer!

CMGragain · November 2014

Confetti clogs and breaks the vacuum cleaners. That is why so many venues don't allow it.

beethery · November 2014

CMGragain said:

Confetti clogs and breaks the vacuum cleaners. That is why so many venues don't allow it.

Makes sense.

Ima be in my venue after everyone leaves just running around with one of those big ass push brooms.

holyguacamole79 · November 2014

I had a vision of love, and it was all that you've given to me.

JennyColada · November 2014

I don't think I had any vision at all. It actually kind of made planning stressful because anything from florist to cake design I honestly had no clue what I wanted.

Honestly, I just wanted someone else to plan every aspect of my wedding and to just show up and have a good time.

pinkcow13 · November 2014

You know, I had a vision of me being in a fabulous white princess ball gown with a tiara. I was going to have about 16 bridesmaides, a bachelorette party in Miami, and a tiara because I'm a princess. And then I outgrew being 16 . I totally had these crazy wedding visions until I was engaged , sad to say lol!

raissyrais · November 2014

I never dreamed about my wedding like it seems a lot of girls do or have done. I never thought about the dress or cake etc during my whole lifetime until FI proposed. Even then, I held off a bit. But after watching some wedding shows, going on TK and reading magazines, I guess I started getting in the mood more.

However I don't think I have a vision really. I just want everything to be elegant, classic and simple. When I think about the wedding, the two things I think about the most is the vows with FI and everybody dancing on the dance floor. Weird.

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