Wasn't sure what category to post this in, but since it's a sensitive subject I figured this was a good place to start.
I really want to honor my baby sister at my wedding in July. She passed sometime during my mom's third trimester due to a heart complication. I was only five at the time, and while she did live for a couple of hours after the c-secrion, I was never blessed with the opportunity to meet her or even lay eyes on her in person. Even though I was so young and it was almost 20 years ago, I have always felt very sad about her passing and very connected to her. Especially knowing that she would have be standing with my other sisters as a bridesmaid, I want to make sure that she is remembered.
Here are the problems I am having with this. Obviously, infant death is a very tragic thing and I want to honor the spirit of her memory and who she is to me without making people very sad or upset. So tact is definiely an issue.
The other thing is that I don't have any photos of her alive. I have seen a lot of great ideas for memorializing loved ones with photos, but I feel that her casket photos are very personal and sad, and don't represent her in a joyful way.
I am planning on having silver pendants made with her initials on them for my mother and sisters to carry on their bouquets and for my father and brother to wear on their boutinierres, and I am going to wear opals which are her birth stone. But those are both things that are for me/family and I want something that will be noticeable for our guests as well.
I've seen a lot of great ideas for those who have lost their own children, but many of them don't translate well for a deceased infant who is a sibling, so I don't really know where to go.
Any help much appreciated!