Chit Chat

Hair Length and Age

Backstory: I belong to this ridiculous group on facebook that talks about Bravo's reality shows (Real Housewives, etc.) where people sit all day and talk about Claudia's feet, Nene's hair and blah blah. They also get into legitimate e-fights over this shit because they have this idea that everything on reality tv shows are 100% real. I like to lurk sometimes (if anyone's interested in lurking, the group is called Get Real LOL Bravo).

Anyway, someone mentioned having really long hair after a certain age. Apparently Kyle Richards should cut her hair because it's too long for her age. I don't really get this school of thought and find it to be a bit outdated and rather ageist. She's also 46 and I don't consider that "older". I believe that women should make their own decisions regarding their hair and appearance and should not be pressured by society to look a certain way. Whether they are bald or have hair down their ankles, something as intimate as hairstyle should be left to that person without judgment from others. Also, I am 23 and a friend is in her 30s. We went to a boutique together and she said she was too old for everything in the store. The owner of the shop is in her 40s-50s and looks amazing! She is basically what I want to look like at her age. Who on earth made the decision that you have to look a certain way when you hit your 40s (or even your 30s)? Wtf?

What do you think? Perhaps my thoughts are a bit too "kumbaya camp fire circle". I am curious of what other people think about looking a certain way after you hit a particular age. 



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Re: Hair Length and Age

  • Also, I'm adding some pictures. Because Kyle's hair is amazing and THESE WOMEN ARE DRESSED SO FABULOUS

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    chibiyuivikinganna87
  • One of my advisors from grad school is I believe in her 60's. She has long, gorgeous gray hair. She looks like a goddess.

    I don't see the point in wasting energy trying to demand that people look or dress a certain way beyond a certain age. I have always felt I looked terrible with short hair and I don't see how I look with short hair will change once I start to wrinkle.
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  • chibiyuichibiyui The Boring Part of MD member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    I agree that the hair comments are ageist.

    As far as your friend, I kinda get that. I still get a lot of my clothing from juniors stores, but I get longer cuts, avoid almost everything with text, etc. Not necessarily because I want to dress my age, but because I don't want to dress like a high schooler.
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  • emmaaaemmaaa North Carolina mod
    Moderator 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    My mom always says this. She thinks she is too old (56) to have long hair. I think long hair can be beautiful at any age.

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I think how long your hair is, is really dependent on the quality of hair you have.  So if you have some awesome, thick and silky beautiful hair then rock a long length.  If your hair is better suited for a shorter hair style then cut that shit regardless of your age.

    I mean I do think that women who try to look like they are still in their 20's when they are actually 40 or 50 or older is just sad.  There isn't a way a certain age should dress, but I do think that people need to accept and own their age instead of trying to claim they are younger or act like they are younger when they clearly aren't.  I find that women who accept their age actually look a lot younger then those who are still wishing they were 21.

    But I do know that when I was in my early 20's I was reluctant to shop in the "older" section of the department stores.  I thought I was too young for that clothing, but in reality I was just in denial and had to realize that I wasn't 13 so the ultra low ride jeans just weren't going to fit or look good on my more mature body.

    Then again, I am not a fan of younger people showing off their body just because they are young so it is "okay."

    emmaaaPrettyGirlLost
  • fwtx5815fwtx5815 cowboys nation member
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    When I read the title of the post before I clicked on it, the first thing that popped into my head was Kyle Richards from RHOBH. I think she looks fucking fab. (I don't care for her long bangs though.)

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  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
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    I think if it looks nice, it is fine. Some styles age people and look dated. If you have super long hair that just hangs there limply, no shape or style to it, you'd be doing yourself a favor cutting it.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    I don't really believe that train of thoughts.  Although most of the women in RHW have so many extensions in order to look younger and often side eye in that way.   If you can grow your hair like Crystal Gayle, go for it, but excessive extensions do not look good to me.


    I'm in my 40's have medium to long hair.   I look horrible in short hair, been there done that.  But I don't look good in really long either.  I feel like I look my best with medium to med-long hair.   






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  • mikenbergermikenberger In a f'n cornfield member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    I'd only have shorter hair when I'm older because it's easier and I'll be damned if I'm going to be wasting my golden years flat ironing my hair. But if someone else wants to rock the long hair at 70, go for it. It's not my hair.

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    larrygaga
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I think it's ageist, but I think you also have to be realistic about how well you can pull off certain styles.  For example, my Mom lost a lot of hair during chemo and it never really recovered.  She doesn't have long hair because it simply wouldn't look good.  It's way too thin and would make her look more bald than she actually is.  Having shorter hair gives her more body and frames her face much better than long hair ever could.  But if she wanted long hair? Go for it, Mom. 

    I've seen older women with fabulous long hair.  And I've seen younger women with long hair who look terrible.  It shouldn't matter either way if that's what they want.  @lolo883 was spot on. 


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    larrygaga
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
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    I think Kyle's hair is awesome. And she's like 10 years older than me, so she is not old! 

    I'll rock my long hair for as long as I can, and as long as it looks nice and healthy. Fuck that noise about being too old. 

    larrygagaPrettyGirlLost
  • BlergbotBlergbot An enchanted land member
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    Before all that shit went down on THe Bump yesterday, my month board was discussing Mom Haircuts. I have long hair, and I intend to keep it that way...though things can change, so I guess I just don't plan on cutting my long, beautiful locks. I get that it can be more practical, but that's what ponytails are for.
    theartistformerlyknownas
  • larrygagalarrygaga Czechoslovakia member
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    edited January 2015
    People are allowed to look and dress anyway they want and anyone shaming then for it should be ashamed themselves. How can our society ever progress that women should look X way or have impossible standards if women can't even move past it.

    Personally, I think she should rock on with her bad self.
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  • Blergbot said:
    Before all that shit went down on THe Bump yesterday, my month board was discussing Mom Haircuts. I have long hair, and I intend to keep it that way...though things can change, so I guess I just don't plan on cutting my long, beautiful locks. I get that it can be more practical, but that's what ponytails are for.
    The last thing I'll want to do when I have a baby is cut my hair off. It takes SO much longer to style when it's shorter! High messy bun FTW.

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    Blergbotcharlottesmom0626JasperandOpalPrettyGirlLost
  • JCbride2015JCbride2015 Dirty Jerz member
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    Yeah, the "older women shouldn't have long hair rule" is absolutely wrong.  In fact, I think that Mom Haircut or Grandma Haircut 'do is the easiest way to make yourself look dated, way more than having long hair past when you "should" have it.

    I think the rule of thumb should just be what looks good on you, and looks current.  And you need to accept when maybe your hair quality is just not as nice as it used to be and long hair starts looking frizzy or dry.  My mom struggles with this.  She is only 53 but she has used at-home dye since she was 13, and never gets particularly great quality haircuts.  She held onto her long hair way longer than she should have.  It looked dry and overprocessed and it was aging her, but she kept saying she felt like once she cut her hair she would look old.  She got a bob recently and it looks SO.  MUCH.  BETTER.  With the dead nasty ends gone, her hair actually has shape and style now instead of just being long for the sake of being long.

    On the other end of the spectrum, I worry sometimes that my long hair makes me look too young at work.  I'm also just getting the itch to donate it again.  I can't wait to chop it all off after the wedding!
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    levioosalarrygaga
  • Preach. I agree with you all. You have to do what you feel is the most flattering. Right now my hair reaches my chest and that's "mid-length" for me. "Long" is like down to my butt. I've been told by a few people that length looks great on me, I shouldn't cut it, etc. But in the past few years I experimented with hair colors and lightened it a LOT. I dyed it black and cut off several inches and am now just trying to recover. Maybe I'll go back to long someday but right now it would not look good.

    Oh, and I definitely agree about the looking like a high schooler thing. I feel like most stores either have really matronly clothing that would look horrible on me or really weird neon graphic t-shirts and trendy stuff. I just want to look like someone my age D:


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  • @JCBride2015 I LOVE bobs. I think they're so gorgeous and fun. When I'm older, I'll hopefully get my hair like permanently straightened or something and cut like this:

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    God bless Amy Tan and her stunning hair.


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    JCbride2015
  • maeday2 said:
    I agree that it's all in how you style it. 

    Case in point. 


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    I heard Jim Bob was not feeling the new look. If I were her, I would've left it for a little while just so he would give me some peace and not knock me up. 


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    doeydo
  • plainjane0415plainjane0415 The hills of Tennessee member
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    I didn't realize age played a factor in hairstyles, but when this wedding is over, I'm chopping mine off, whether I'm the appropriate age to do so or not!  I can't decide between these two styles.

     

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    esstee33ashley8918cosenti7
  • Cookie PusherCookie Pusher Looking over your shoulder member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    My hair grows super fast, at least 1" per month. I have long hair out of sheer laziness. Upkeep on shorter styles is just... too much for me. I usually wear my hair in a braid, ponytail or bun for work since no one sees me in my cube anyway. If I need to look "done", I curl the ends a la Duchess Kate. Once every 12-18 months, I chop off a foot or two and donate it. I don't care if I'm 80 - if my hair still grows as quickly and nicely as it does now, I'm going to keep growing it out and donating it as often as I can.
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  • pinkcow13pinkcow13 The Concrete Jungle member
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    Like others said, it all depends on what looks good on the individual, regardless of age. I have seen older women with really long, gorgeous hair and it looks fabulous on them. My mom used to have really long, thick, hair years ago. It started thinning out though, so she has kept it short for years, and it suits her really well. 

    FMIL tends to dress "younger" for her age, but it suits her. She's not the "mom jeans" type, and that's fine. Plus, she used to be a shopaholic, and she has TONS of clothes, many never worn that she passes on to me, which is awesome as we have similar taste. In fact, I'm wearing one of the cute sweaters she recently gave me right now :)
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  • NowIamMrsKleinNowIamMrsKlein Cold Canadian North (British Columbia) member
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    Short hair on me is so much more of a pain in the ass.

    My hair is currently about an inch below the bra line and this is my most common length. My hair is thin and pin straight. If I cut it short it always looks so limp and lank. No oomph!

    Plus with long hair when im trying to get ready in 15 minutes every morning a quick run over my bangs with a flat iron and I'm good to go. With short hair I always tend to wake up with the stupidest bed head.

    I'll probably keep my long hair for quite awhile. I look super young as it is. I'm 28 and still get Id'D in a province where the drinking age is 18. So as long as I look super fabulous my hair will remain in the longer range.

    Although I'm totally doing the post wedding chop and donating my hair.



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  • MagicInks grandma sounds like the kind of lady I hope to be at 62!


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    plainjane0415VulgarGirlvikinganna87
  • amelishaamelisha Canadian Texas member
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    I understand that many older women get short haircuts out of ease or necessity (thinning hair, bad texture, whatever), but I don't think there's any reason older women shouldn't have long hair if it's nice hair. That goes for anyone though, as scraggly, thin, unkempt long hair doesn't look great on any age in my opinion. (However, I will get on my feminist soapbox for a sec and say that if society's approval of your looks isn't on your priority list, you do you and let that stuff run wild.)

    I think long hair can look great on any age as long as it fits your style. I had an amazing prof in university who was probably in her late fifties with totally grey hair who had this great, pin-straight 70s long middle-parted style and it suited her perfectly. I thought it made her look younger, not older, and it just went with her overall aesthetic perfectly. I also love those very elegant older women who wear long grey hair in fancy braids and buns and stuff, it is so classic and lovely.

    As long as it suits your fashion sense and your lifestyle, right? Like, I think older women with big ugly horse-y extensions look silly, but I also think that young women with that hair look foolish as well. Maybe it's worse with older women because you think they should be old enough to know better?

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  • Yeah, the "older women shouldn't have long hair rule" is absolutely wrong.  In fact, I think that Mom Haircut or Grandma Haircut 'do is the easiest way to make yourself look dated, way more than having long hair past when you "should" have it.

    I think the rule of thumb should just be what looks good on you, and looks current.  And you need to accept when maybe your hair quality is just not as nice as it used to be and long hair starts looking frizzy or dry.  My mom struggles with this.  She is only 53 but she has used at-home dye since she was 13, and never gets particularly great quality haircuts.  She held onto her long hair way longer than she should have.  It looked dry and overprocessed and it was aging her, but she kept saying she felt like once she cut her hair she would look old.  She got a bob recently and it looks SO.  MUCH.  BETTER.  With the dead nasty ends gone, her hair actually has shape and style now instead of just being long for the sake of being long.

    On the other end of the spectrum, I worry sometimes that my long hair makes me look too young at work.  I'm also just getting the itch to donate it again.  I can't wait to chop it all off after the wedding!
    I just cut off 6-8 inches and my hair now falls right above my shoulders... shortest I have had it in 15 years! Everyone keeps saying how it makes me look more my age (I am 28 and people often think I am 20-22. I work in corporate sponsorship sales and I do feel like looking young has made some sales harder as I don't feel like the client takes me seriously or thinks I don't know what I am talking about). My GM specifically said she thought it looked fantastic and that my long hair was making me look a lot younger. 


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