.

misshart00 · January 2015

I thought you were leaving.

[Deleted User] · January 2015

climbingsingle · January 2015

You've gotten advice. You just don't want to take it.

Start saving. Get married when you can afford to pay for everything.

lyndausvi · January 2015

Honest question. What do you want?

I'm gathering you want to still get married in June. How many people do you plan on inviting? Do you want a religious ceremony? What?

It's hard to help when the only details we have is you thought you had a venue and now you don't and you don't have any money saved?

You can get married in a park. Have a cake and punch wedding. Have a brunch wedding. You can wait longer to save.

Knottie92656739 · January 2015

I definitely want to get married in June. I just want a little wedding in a building with about 50-75 people. It is hard trying to explain when you don't want things on social networks or when you are constantly being criticized over a suggestion. I have never been through this before that's why I was seeking advice from people who may have dealt with this before. I have never posted a discussion like this before and it has been the worst experience ever. I was told by my parents that I would have a budget of $5000, but as I started planning...all of that started changing. No one would pay for anything. It is confusing to me too. We thought we were getting help with the wedding and it turns out that we were not. $5000 was for suppose to be for everything, like the food, venue, reception, etc. I am not a big flashy person who want an expensive wedding. I understand that with the little information that I have given you all, it may come off like I am just begging for help, but that really isn't the case.I have not received money from anyone. Not from GOFundMe, family members, or friends and I would NEVER ask for money. I just wanted to know what I should do. Me and my fiance' are not in a rush. I never cared about spending a fortune on my wedding because it is not about how much you spend; it is about saying "I do" to the person you love. We may just wait a little longer to save.

beethery · January 2015

Knottie92656739 said:

I definitely want to get married in June. I just want a little wedding in a building with about 50-75 people. It is hard trying to explain when you don't want things on social networks or when you are constantly being criticized over a suggestion. I have never been through this before that's why I was seeking advice from people who may have dealt with this before. I have never posted a discussion like this before and it has been the worst experience ever. I was told by my parents that I would have a budget of $5000, but as I started planning...all of that started changing. No one would pay for anything. It is confusing to me too. We thought we were getting help with the wedding and it turns out that we were not. $5000 was for suppose to be for everything, like the food, venue, reception, etc. I am not a big flashy person who want an expensive wedding. I understand that with the little information that I have given you all, it may come off like I am just begging for help, but that really isn't the case.I have not received money from anyone. Not from GOFundMe, family members, or friends and I would NEVER ask for money. I just wanted to know what I should do. Me and my fiance' are not in a rush. I never cared about spending a fortune on my wedding because it is not about how much you spend; it is about saying "I do" to the person you love. We may just wait a little longer to save.

Nobody has to pay for any of your plans except you. Don't count money until it's in your hand, and do not plan anything you couldn't afford to take over yourself.

Knottie92656739 · January 2015

I know that? I am saying in general... That is why we were trying different things. I never expected anyone to pay for my wedding! That would be ridiculous...We were just told that we would get help...big difference. You are excused...there are plenty of discussions you can entertain. If you are not given suggestions then your comment isn't needed.

flantastic · January 2015

Knottie92656739 said:

I know that? I am saying in general... That is why we were trying different things. I never expected anyone to pay for my wedding! That would be ridiculous...We were just told that we would get help...big difference. You are excused...there are plenty of discussions you can entertain. If you are not given suggestions then your comment isn't needed.

You asked one question in your OP. People have the right to respond to your original question, and that's what they did. It didn't take away from a "discussion" about how to solve your wedding because there was nothing else to discuss - you gave no other information and asked no other questions until now, and all of us agreed upon the answer to your original question. People even did throw out suggestions, but pretty much all we could suggest was save your money and pay for a wedding when you can.

I can appreciate that you don't want much for your wedding - but what money do you and your fiance have? How much per month do you think you can save? Since that's the only money you can count on, if you give us that budget figure we can probably help with suggestions for a simple wedding in June.

manateehugger · January 2015

Knottie92656739 said:

I know that? I am saying in general... That is why we were trying different things. I never expected anyone to pay for my wedding! That would be ridiculous...We were just told that we would get help...big difference. You are excused...there are plenty of discussions you can entertain. If you are not given suggestions then your comment isn't needed.

And again, you don't think it's embarrassing and shameful to beg money for a party? I think people use Go Fund Me for all sorts of shameful things, but a wedding ranks high on the list. I don't understand how you think your wedding is a "cause" when lots of people desperately crowdsource for things like medical emergencies.

Either plan a beautiful simple wedding (one of the best weddings I have ever been to was a BBQ in a public park on a lake shore - probably cost the couple less than $2K) or do what every one else does for life's luxuries and save up for it.

[Deleted User] · January 2015

lyndausvi · January 2015

The easiest thing to do it figure out how much money you have now and how much money you can save by June. Then start doing research on where you can get married based on the budget.

Being June it will be harder, but with a small guest list opens you up to restaurants with private rooms. If funds are really low then just to a simple wedding in a park and serve cake and punch afterwards. If you have more try a brunch meal at a local restaurant. Work your way up.

Food and beverage will cost the most. As it should. Cuts should be made with invitations, decor, flowers, stuff like that.

The thing is YOU have to doing the planning. You have to do the leg work. It will not just be handed to you.

Knottie92656739 · February 2015

Thank you everyone for your suggestions and advice. Also, I would like to apologize if I offended anyone today.

If we get married in June, we can have at least $3000 saved. I found a building today that will allow us to have both ceremony & reception for $2000. It comes with linens, tables, & chairs. Do any of you have any ideas/suggestions for inexpensive decorations? Favors? Food? I have my dress, the cake and Dj already. I am not sure of anything else I am missing.

lyndausvi · February 2015

$2000 is too much for your budget for a building without food. That would only leave you with $1000. Which comes to $13 a person if you have 75 people. That is not a whole lot for everything that is left.

I would keep looking around for a place. Try community centers and places like that.

For food, try restaurants who cater. BBQ and Italian are often good on budgets.

Then check out decorations.

Favors are not necessary, so I would nix it altogether with your budget. If you want something try something edible.

Knottie92656739 · February 2015

I didn't even think about that, thanks. I will start looking for different places now.

AddieCake · February 2015

I'm gonna need some clarification on,"I've done my research, and some people on here are known for being rude." You've researched us? And did you seriously tell another poster, "You are excused" ? Good grief.

jenna8984 · February 2015

Knottie92656739 said:

Thank you everyone for your suggestions and advice. Also, I would like to apologize if I offended anyone today.

If we get married in June, we can have at least $3000 saved. I found a building today that will allow us to have both ceremony & reception for $2000. It comes with linens, tables, & chairs. Do any of you have any ideas/suggestions for inexpensive decorations? Favors? Food? I have my dress, the cake and Dj already. I am not sure of anything else I am missing.

Required- officiant, marriage license, meals for all in attendance appropriate for time of day (may be just cake & punch in the afternoon, and includes vendors such as DJ)

Optional- Rings, photography, bouquets, invitations & thank you cards, hair & makeup, small gifts for bridal party, your fiance's outfit

Like Lynda said- your best bet is going to be to rent a hall that is generally free or a couple hundred dollars and get bbq or Italian catering.

ohannabelle · February 2015

Knottie92656739 said:

Obviously it is no point in talking about this anymore because you all do not know the whole story and I will not explain it to a stranger. Thank you for the suggestions. Bye everyone

Again.

jacques27 · February 2015

Knottie92656739 said:

Thank you everyone for your suggestions and advice. Also, I would like to apologize if I offended anyone today.

If we get married in June, we can have at least $3000 saved. I found a building today that will allow us to have both ceremony & reception for $2000. It comes with linens, tables, & chairs. Do any of you have any ideas/suggestions for inexpensive decorations? Favors? Food? I have my dress, the cake and Dj already. I am not sure of anything else I am missing.

You need to start with what is absolutely mandatory to get married. That means you, a person to marry, a license, and an officiant of some sort (who you have to pay, by the way). So, deduct the total cost of that from your $3000 immediately.

If you want people to attend your ceremony, then what do you absolutely need? A place to hold that many people and enough chairs that every butt has a seat. You need a way to convey the information to them. So ceremony site, chairs, and invites.

If people attend a ceremony, they must be thanked immediately afterwards with a reception, so then what do you absolutely need? A place to hold the reception, enough chairs that every butt has a seat, and food, drink, and dinnerware appropriate to the time of day and venue.

Everything else on top of that - decorations, bouquets, favors, professionally done hair and make-up, photos are gravy on top. Your guests don't care if your flowers are pretty or your hair professionally styled or if your venue has any sort of sentimental meaning to you - they care about having a comfortable place to sit, enough food to eat, and something to drink. So the bulk of your budget needs to be devoted to providing that.

You also need to keep in mind that if you want a photographer, they are expensive and will greatly eat into your $3000 budget. Alcohol can be another budget buster.

The easiest ways to bring down costs are to either cut the guest list or change the wedding to a less expensive time of day where a full dinner is not expected. Either luncheon with less formal food or a wedding/reception during a non-meal time (say 2-5pm) where you serve cake and punch and maybe a few other nibbles so everyone can be on their merry way to grab dinner somewhere else.

ohannabelle · February 2015

jenna8984 said:

Knottie92656739 said:

Thank you everyone for your suggestions and advice. Also, I would like to apologize if I offended anyone today.

If we get married in June, we can have at least $3000 saved. I found a building today that will allow us to have both ceremony & reception for $2000. It comes with linens, tables, & chairs. Do any of you have any ideas/suggestions for inexpensive decorations? Favors? Food? I have my dress, the cake and Dj already. I am not sure of anything else I am missing.

Required- officiant, marriage license, meals for all in attendance appropriate for time of day (may be just cake & punch in the afternoon, and includes vendors such as DJ)
Optional- Rings, photography, bouquets, invitations & thank you cards, hair & makeup, small gifts for bridal party, your fiance's outfit

Like Lynda said- your best bet is going to be to rent a hall that is generally free or a couple hundred dollars and get bbq or Italian catering.

There you go! So much better. That's the polite and correct way to ask for suggestions and get them.

I'm in favor of afternoon weddings. A non meal time that doesn't require you to give everyone a meal. Cake, maybe a few cheese and fruit and vegetable trays for the non-sweet eaters.

flantastic · February 2015

jacques27 said:

Knottie92656739 said:

Thank you everyone for your suggestions and advice. Also, I would like to apologize if I offended anyone today.

If we get married in June, we can have at least $3000 saved. I found a building today that will allow us to have both ceremony & reception for $2000. It comes with linens, tables, & chairs. Do any of you have any ideas/suggestions for inexpensive decorations? Favors? Food? I have my dress, the cake and Dj already. I am not sure of anything else I am missing.

You need to start with what is absolutely mandatory to get married. That means you, a person to marry, a license, and an officiant of some sort (who you have to pay, by the way). So, deduct the total cost of that from your $3000 immediately.
If you want people to attend your ceremony, then what do you absolutely need? A place to hold that many people and enough chairs that every butt has a seat. You need a way to convey the information to them. So ceremony site, chairs, and invites.
If people attend a ceremony, they must be thanked immediately afterwards with a reception, so then what do you absolutely need? A place to hold the reception, enough chairs that every butt has a seat, and food, drink, and dinnerware appropriate to the time of day and venue.
Everything else on top of that - decorations, bouquets, favors, professionally done hair and make-up, photos are gravy on top. Your guests don't care if your flowers are pretty or your hair professionally styled or if your venue has any sort of sentimental meaning to you - they care about having a comfortable place to sit, enough food to eat, and something to drink. So the bulk of your budget needs to be devoted to providing that.
You also need to keep in mind that if you want a photographer, they are expensive and will greatly eat into your $3000 budget. Alcohol can be another budget buster.
The easiest ways to bring down costs are to either cut the guest list or change the wedding to a less expensive time of day where a full dinner is not expected. Either luncheon with less formal food or a wedding/reception during a non-meal time (say 2-5pm) where you serve cake and punch and maybe a few other nibbles so everyone can be on their merry way to grab dinner somewhere else.

You may look around for invites and reply cards and find that all of the advertised invitation suites on the internet seem really expensive, which they are. Stamps are part of that budget too. It's not a bad thing to just buy some cardstock and print your own simple invites at home or FedEx Office, and it's usually the cheapest way.

CMGragain · February 2015

OK, priorities:

1. To have a wedding, you need a couple who is legally able to getr married, an officiant, a license, and witnesses. This is how thousands of brides get married every year.

2. You want more? OK. You already have a wedding dress. If you have any guests, you must have a reception for the after the ceremony. This means cake and punch. This kind of reception iis best held during the afternoon. Dancing and DJs are not expected. You must also have invitations. (Try Vistaprint.) Bridesmaids and groomsmen are optional. My own wedding was like this.

3. More? Serve a brunch. This kind of wedding is usually in the late morning. DJ and dancing are optional, but you won't have as much dancing participation.

4. Dinner reception with alcohol? You can't afford this.

Fire the DJ. You don't need him. If you want dancing, use an ipod loaded with your favorites. Alcohol is completely optional. You don't need it, especially in the daytime. A big expense is often photography' Have your nerdy camera geek relative take pictures for you with his fancy digital camera,

Other ideas: Have an outdoor wedding in a city park. (Get your park reservation in writing!) Serve picnic food. My sister's wedding was like this.

.

Re: .

Choose Another Board

Search Boards