Okay so I have been engaged for about 16 months... (we wanted a long engagement so that I can graduate college first). Anyways, my parents have been involved in my wedding from the very start. In fact they are paying for just about everything, his parents on the other hand, not so much. The keep saying they will help out, and then back out. They have done this at least three times now. For most of the engagement they actually never really had any in put in the wedding details, and when they did, it would be a few quick questions and then quickly change the subject like they never mentioned it.
Well now we are a few months away from the wedding and they are making my life a living hell. They now want to have a say in things and have opinions about stuff that I have already taken care of. And then they get nasty when I have done something that they don't agree with (theme, venue, photographer, the registries, etc.). IN fact they call my fiancé (their son) a lot of times and make statements about different aspects of the wedding, and it normally ends in an argument, again might I add, they have not pitched in a single penny. But yet they have strong feelings about the wedding that we have been planning.
Things have been really tough between his family and mine lately because my parents are paying for 100% of the wedding, and his family is now telling them how to spend their money. I have many times, told my fiancé it's not even worth it anymore, I can take the cut downs, the verbal abuse or even the attitude that they constantly have against me and my parents. Now the closer we get to the wedding the worst it gets. We have decide to pay for all of the bridal parties attire (my parents are very traditional) and his mom started complaining to him about where we are getting the tuxes and that we need to keep in mind that is brother is a very large man and that we need to make sure he is taken care of. Constantly treating us like we are stupid and small children (he's 31 and I'm 25, we are not children by any means).
I don't know what to do. I am extremely nervous about the wedding and how they are going to act around my family. I feel like I wont ever win when it comes to them and that sometimes they think i'm not good enough for their son. It's hard, really hard to try and be nice. But I'm at the edge of a cliff right now, and i'm just seconds away from falling over. :-(