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Pre-Wedding Festivities

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Re: Pre-Wedding Festivities

  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    It is rude to host any of these parties in your own honor or to have any fundraisers for yourself - regardless of what is "common" or "expected" in your area.
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  • happybridetobe1987happybridetobe1987 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper

    I live in Toronto, and here is what we are doing:

    Engagement party- Not having one of these. Our engagement is quite "short" (under a year) and I just feel it would be too much for our nearest and dearest. If someone wanted to throw us one, we wouldn't object. But we certainly did not expect one and I'm quite relieved nobody asked! :)

    Bridal Shower- FI's aunt is throwing me one I think, and my bridal party are throwing another.

    Jack and Jill- I'm sorry if you take offence to what people have said on here about these kinds of parties. But I do echo what they've said. I know you never said you're planning to have one! And if everyone in your area of Ontario has one, then it's only natural for it to be on your radar. but take it from somebody who has been invited to a TON, not only for weddings I was invited to but for weddings I wasn't even on the guest list for. You pay a ticket to go, pay for your own booze, put money into games and other things for the B&G, and then sometimes you aren't even invited to the party you helped them throw! In my head, that's totally nuts. Even the weddings I was invited to in add'n to the Jack and Jill, it's so weird to me that the couple is fundraising for their wedding and then I'm expected to pitch in a shower gift, wedding gift, and money for hotel, travel etc. That all being said (apologize for my long-winded-ness, over-caffeinated!), they are common in the more rural areas around Toronto but many people I know still don't like them.

    Bachelor/Bachelorette- my FI and I are each having our own little night out with our friends. For mine, we are doing spa and girly things. FI may do something up at the cottage with the boys.

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  • snakeyladysnakeylady member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its
    Engagement party - I'm not sure how common engagement parties are in my area, as not too many of our friends are married yet, and only one other couple had one. They are pretty common in my family though, at least on my mom's side. We had one, and it was hosted by our parents. Our moms are very good friends, and so they planned out who to invite and what they wanted to do for it. It was a nice backyard party at my parents' house and our local family and friends came.

    Bridal Shower - I know our moms want to host one together and my mom has reached out to my MOH about it. It will also probably be at my parents' house.

    Bachelor/Bachelorette - I know our guy friends are throwing fiance a bachelor party which will probably be meeting up at someone's apartment, drinking, and playing elaborate board games all weekend. As for a bachelorette, no one has said anything about one to me yet, so I don't know.
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  • notdoingitbythebooknotdoingitbythebook member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper

    We've had a lot of people ask us if we're having an engagement party. As of now we're not but if they would like to treat our next big party as such, go for it. It's just not an engagement party. We're too far into the whole planning thing for an engagement party... we're just having people over next month for the first big party of the season.

    My FMIL is hosting the shower. It will be very traditional (really the only traditional thing in the whole wedding adventure) so that will be interesting. Estrogen hell I'm sure.

    Jack and Jills (or Stag and Does) are just tacky. They are the norm in this area but I think it's gross to be asked to fundraise for someone else's wedding. Can't afford it? Don't have it. Don't force me to pay more money for your wedding. Tacky. Rude. I don't really care if that opinion is offensive... it's the truth.  

    I'm lucky that by having a Man of Honour I get out of the tacky stagette stuff. I think we're going camping for a "stagette" kind of thing but it's not going to be the typical penis/getting drunk/making an ass out of ourselves kind of thing.

     We'll probably host the rehearsal dinner since I promised my dad that we'd have a pig roast when I got married. Rehearsal dinner seems to be the best option!

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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Knottie62810702 said:

    We've had a lot of people ask us if we're having an engagement party. As of now we're not but if they would like to treat our next big party as such, go for it. It's just not an engagement party. We're too far into the whole planning thing for an engagement party... we're just having people over next month for the first big party of the season.

    My FMIL is hosting the shower. It will be very traditional (really the only traditional thing in the whole wedding adventure) so that will be interesting. Estrogen hell I'm sure.

    Jack and Jills (or Stag and Does) are just tacky. They are the norm in this area but I think it's gross to be asked to fundraise for someone else's wedding. Can't afford it? Don't have it. Don't force me to pay more money for your wedding. Tacky. Rude. I don't really care if that opinion is offensive... it's the truth.  

    I'm lucky that by having a Man of Honour I get out of the tacky stagette stuff. I think we're going camping for a "stagette" kind of thing but it's not going to be the typical penis/getting drunk/making an ass out of ourselves kind of thing.

     We'll probably host the rehearsal dinner since I promised my dad that we'd have a pig roast when I got married. Rehearsal dinner seems to be the best option!

    Hey you!  Yeah, you, KnottieNumbers.  I think you might be cool.  Can you change your screen name to something recognizable, so I can decide if you are, indeed, cool?
    Report Reply
  • notdoingitbythebooknotdoingitbythebook member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    adk19 said:

    Knottie62810702 said:

    We've had a lot of people ask us if we're having an engagement party. As of now we're not but if they would like to treat our next big party as such, go for it. It's just not an engagement party. We're too far into the whole planning thing for an engagement party... we're just having people over next month for the first big party of the season.

    My FMIL is hosting the shower. It will be very traditional (really the only traditional thing in the whole wedding adventure) so that will be interesting. Estrogen hell I'm sure.

    Jack and Jills (or Stag and Does) are just tacky. They are the norm in this area but I think it's gross to be asked to fundraise for someone else's wedding. Can't afford it? Don't have it. Don't force me to pay more money for your wedding. Tacky. Rude. I don't really care if that opinion is offensive... it's the truth.  

    I'm lucky that by having a Man of Honour I get out of the tacky stagette stuff. I think we're going camping for a "stagette" kind of thing but it's not going to be the typical penis/getting drunk/making an ass out of ourselves kind of thing.

     We'll probably host the rehearsal dinner since I promised my dad that we'd have a pig roast when I got married. Rehearsal dinner seems to be the best option!

    Hey you!  Yeah, you, KnottieNumbers.  I think you might be cool.  Can you change your screen name to something recognizable, so I can decide if you are, indeed, cool?
    How's that?
    Report Reply
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    notdoingitbythebook said:

    adk19 said:

    Knottie62810702 said:

    We've had a lot of people ask us if we're having an engagement party. As of now we're not but if they would like to treat our next big party as such, go for it. It's just not an engagement party. We're too far into the whole planning thing for an engagement party... we're just having people over next month for the first big party of the season.

    My FMIL is hosting the shower. It will be very traditional (really the only traditional thing in the whole wedding adventure) so that will be interesting. Estrogen hell I'm sure.

    Jack and Jills (or Stag and Does) are just tacky. They are the norm in this area but I think it's gross to be asked to fundraise for someone else's wedding. Can't afford it? Don't have it. Don't force me to pay more money for your wedding. Tacky. Rude. I don't really care if that opinion is offensive... it's the truth.  

    I'm lucky that by having a Man of Honour I get out of the tacky stagette stuff. I think we're going camping for a "stagette" kind of thing but it's not going to be the typical penis/getting drunk/making an ass out of ourselves kind of thing.

     We'll probably host the rehearsal dinner since I promised my dad that we'd have a pig roast when I got married. Rehearsal dinner seems to be the best option!

    Hey you!  Yeah, you, KnottieNumbers.  I think you might be cool.  Can you change your screen name to something recognizable, so I can decide if you are, indeed, cool?
    How's that?
    Yep, and that screen name you chose makes me think Again that you might be cool.
    Report Reply
  • notdoingitbythebooknotdoingitbythebook member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    adk19 said:

    notdoingitbythebook said:

    adk19 said:

    Knottie62810702 said:

    We've had a lot of people ask us if we're having an engagement party. As of now we're not but if they would like to treat our next big party as such, go for it. It's just not an engagement party. We're too far into the whole planning thing for an engagement party... we're just having people over next month for the first big party of the season.

    My FMIL is hosting the shower. It will be very traditional (really the only traditional thing in the whole wedding adventure) so that will be interesting. Estrogen hell I'm sure.

    Jack and Jills (or Stag and Does) are just tacky. They are the norm in this area but I think it's gross to be asked to fundraise for someone else's wedding. Can't afford it? Don't have it. Don't force me to pay more money for your wedding. Tacky. Rude. I don't really care if that opinion is offensive... it's the truth.  

    I'm lucky that by having a Man of Honour I get out of the tacky stagette stuff. I think we're going camping for a "stagette" kind of thing but it's not going to be the typical penis/getting drunk/making an ass out of ourselves kind of thing.

     We'll probably host the rehearsal dinner since I promised my dad that we'd have a pig roast when I got married. Rehearsal dinner seems to be the best option!

    Hey you!  Yeah, you, KnottieNumbers.  I think you might be cool.  Can you change your screen name to something recognizable, so I can decide if you are, indeed, cool?
    How's that?
    Yep, and that screen name you chose makes me think Again that you might be cool.
    Awesome! And I'm already getting shit for not being by the book on another thread. It amuses me greatly.
    Report Reply
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