k.

kenzo24 · March 2015

AlexisA01 · March 2015

kenzo24 said:
I'm getting married in 6 months. We just found out my fiance's dad has a new girlfriend. He just got divorced from his 3rd wife and only one is invited (future MIL). I don't think the new GF should sit in the front row because I won't meet her until the wedding day. Why would I want a stranger sitting in the most important row? My FH says she should sit up front because it's his dad's date. I'm even thinking of doing engaged/married couples only (thought of this before the new GF). So I don't know if I should make her sit in the back, not invite her or just let her sit in the front row. What do you ladies think?

Jic
Don't seperate her. That is rude. She is his SO they are a social unit, you have to invite her. PP will explain honestly that not only is this super judgey of you but how against etiquette and a trainwreck this will be.

AlexisA01 · March 2015

Your fi is right, listen to him.

mlg78 · March 2015

This is incredibly rude. Don't do this. Also, just engaged or married couples is quite rude as well. Wouldn't you have been upset to have been invited to a wedding but not allowed to bring your fiance when you two were just dating?

Viczaesar · March 2015

kenzo24 said:
I'm getting married in 6 months. We just found out my fiance's dad has a new girlfriend. He just got divorced from his 3rd wife and only one is invited (future MIL). I don't think the new GF should sit in the front row because I won't meet her until the wedding day. Why would I want a stranger sitting in the most important row? My FH says she should sit up front because it's his dad's date. I'm even thinking of doing engaged/married couples only (thought of this before the new GF). So I don't know if I should make her sit in the back, not invite her or just let her sit in the front row. What do you ladies think?

1. All couples should be allowed to sit together.
2. You need to invite everyone in a relationship, no matter whether they're engaged, married, living separately, have been together for two months, whatever. All couples.
3. Of the three bolded possibilities, the only non-incredibly rude one is the third.

banana468 · March 2015

Viczaesar said:

kenzo24 said:
I'm getting married in 6 months. We just found out my fiance's dad has a new girlfriend. He just got divorced from his 3rd wife and only one is invited (future MIL). I don't think the new GF should sit in the front row because I won't meet her until the wedding day. Why would I want a stranger sitting in the most important row? My FH says she should sit up front because it's his dad's date. I'm even thinking of doing engaged/married couples only (thought of this before the new GF). So I don't know if I should make her sit in the back, not invite her or just let her sit in the front row. What do you ladies think?
1. All couples should be allowed to sit together.
2. You need to invite everyone in a relationship, no matter whether they're engaged, married, living separately, have been together for two months, whatever. All couples.
3. Of the three bolded possibilities, the only non-incredibly rude one is the third.

All of this.

To add, do you really want to start your marriage with your first action as a member of your FI'S family like this? That's a great way to have them hate you before you open your mouth in front of them.

Lissa1213 · March 2015

Personally it doesn't matter if you know her, hate her, love her or any other emotion or feeling you have towards her. She is your future FIL's significant other and deserves to be seated next to him.

Personally I HATE my birth mothers husband, the sight of him makes me sick to my stomach even. However he will be seated right next to her in the front row. It's etiquette, I don't care for the scenario but I figure I'll be preoccupied by getting MARRIED that I probably won't even notice.

mikenberger · March 2015

kenzo24 said:
I'm getting married in 6 months. We just found out my fiance's dad has a new girlfriend. He just got divorced from his 3rd wife and only one is invited (future MIL). I don't think the new GF should sit in the front row because I won't meet her until the wedding day. Why would I want a stranger sitting in the most important row? My FH says she should sit up front because it's his dad's date. I'm even thinking of doing engaged/married couples only (thought of this before the new GF). So I don't know if I should make her sit in the back, not invite her or just let her sit in the front row. What do you ladies think?

Make that bitch sit in the back row or buy a seat to the front row with the good view. How dare she date your future FIL.

mlg78 · March 2015

Is this really the impression you want to make with your future in-laws? And possibly your future stepmother in-law?

Maggie0829 · March 2015

kenzo24 said:
I'm getting married in 6 months. We just found out my fiance's dad has a new girlfriend. He just got divorced from his 3rd wife and only one is invited (future MIL). I don't think the new GF should sit in the front row because I won't meet her until the wedding day. Why would I want a stranger sitting in the most important row? My FH says she should sit up front because it's his dad's date. I'm even thinking of doing engaged/married couples only (thought of this before the new GF). So I don't know if I should make her sit in the back, not invite her or just let her sit in the front row. What do you ladies think?

Your FI is right. His Dad should sit with his current GF. It doesn't matter if you haven't met her. This person is your FFILs SO and she should be given the courtesy of sitting with her BF.

As for the bolded, anyone in a relationship should be invited with their SO. So that includes married couples, engaged couples, and couples who have deemed themselves to be in an exclusive relationship regardless of the length they have been together. By your silly rule that would have meant that my H and I would never have been invited to a wedding together for the 8 years we were together before we were engaged. Do you see how insulting that is?

pegasuskat · March 2015

Everybody above is correct, you invite people with their SO's. But, you also need to keep in mind that this a wedding for two, you say his opinion but then say what YOU are going to do, he should have 50/50 decision making choices, just saying.

lovegood90 · March 2015

Sorry, but you don't really get to decide this. Yes it's your wedding, but once you invite guests, it ceases to be all about you. That means that the following non-negotiable, Etiquette 101 "rules" come into play:

- You must seat all SOs together for the ceremony, regardless if you like them or not (so YES, the GF must sit with her SO in the front row. Suck it up).

- You must invite all SOs together on the invitation, regardless if they are married or not, engaged or not, or living together or not. If they are in a relationship for a day or a year, they get invited together or neither gets invited. Again, suck it up and stop being rude by putting arbitrary insulting "rules" in place to determine if your guests' relationships are "worthy" enough of an invite.

novella1186 · March 2015

It doesn't matter if you know the GF or not. You're being extremely petty. I don't know any of FI's relatives; they live far away so I haven't gotten the opportunity to meet them yet. Should I be rude/judge them and make them move back a few rows just cuz I don't' know them? The answer is no. A huge resounding no.

Let her sit where she wants, and absolutely let her sit with your FI's dad, or you're gonna show everyone what a bridezilla you are. Cuz that's a total dick move.

And if anyone pulled this crap with me, like if we attended something and FI was asked to sit in the front row but I was told I couldn't sit with him and had to move back a row or two because the person didn't know me or whatever bullshit reason, guess what? FI wouldn't sit in the front row either. He'd be pissed to see me treated that way, he'd judge the shit out of whoever did that to us, and he'd sit with me a few rows back. Because we're a social unit. Some judgmental rude person doesn't get to separate us.

[Deleted User] · March 2015

kenzo24 said:
I'm getting married in 6 months. We just found out my fiance's dad has a new girlfriend. He just got divorced from his 3rd wife and only one is invited (future MIL). I don't think the new GF should sit in the front row because I won't meet her until the wedding day. Why would I want a stranger sitting in the most important row? My FH says she should sit up front because it's his dad's date. I'm even thinking of doing engaged/married couples only (thought of this before the new GF). So I don't know if I should make her sit in the back, not invite her or just let her sit in the front row. What do you ladies think?

I wouldn't be invited with my FH if someone we knew pulled the "no ring, no bring" rule. We've been dating for six and a half years, have lived together for five and a half, just bought a house together, are discussing what kind of wedding we'd like, but he hasn't gotten down on one knee with a ring. I wouldn't be friends with someone who didn't invite us together. Really? You want me to go somewhere to celebrate your relationship when you're shitting all over mine? No thanks.

levioosa · March 2015

What you want to do is rude, OP. PPs have it covered. You need to invite ALL significant others, regardless of the length of the relationship, and you need to let them sit together.

sarahufl · March 2015

lol at making her sit in the back.

That is ruder than not inviting her at all. Shame on you.

bethsmiles · March 2015

Just no. Invite her, seat her with her date, and move on with your life. This is not even something you should be worrying about.

And like PPs said you should absolutely be inviting ALL SOs. Not doing so would be incredibly rude.

Liatris2010 · March 2015

Agree with everyone else.

Your wedding is a big deal for you parents too. FFIL wants to share this special moment with his gf, which is totally reasonable. If you treat her badly, you are slighting them both. Why reduce FFIL's enjoyment of the day by sening his gf to sit in the back row like a naughty child? What does that accomplish, other than hurting FFIL and his gf?

ShesSoCold · March 2015

kenzo24 said:
I'm getting married in 6 months. We just found out my fiance's dad has a new girlfriend. He just got divorced from his 3rd wife and only one is invited (future MIL). I don't think the new GF should sit in the front row because I won't meet her until the wedding day. Why would I want a stranger sitting in the most important row? My FH says she should sit up front because it's his dad's date. I'm even thinking of doing engaged/married couples only (thought of this before the new GF). So I don't know if I should make her sit in the back, not invite her or just let her sit in the front row. What do you ladies think?

Everyone else has this pretty well covered but I want to know why the fuck the bolded matters? "the most important row"? What does that even mean? Does the first row get Oscar-caliber swag bags? Will they be interviewed by the press? Do they get individual butlers?

FWIW, I have no idea who sat in the first rows at our wedding. I knew I wanted my MOH and H's BM in the first seat on either side (they didn't stand) because she'd be holding my bouquet and he had the rings.

[Deleted User] · March 2015

Aww, that's cute. You deleted your post. Too bad Alexis quoted you so everyone can still see what you said. People will continue to respond. Even more so now that you did the DD (dirty delete). It's basically a bat signal to knotties everywhere. Nice try though.

Dreamergirl8812 · March 2015

Came for the bat signal.

novella1186 · March 2015

No, don't take our advice and constructive criticism-- on a question YOU asked-- to heart and re-think your plan. Don't do a bit of reflection and maybe realize you were mistaken here. Nope. Stomp your feet and run away. JFC.

AlexisA01 · March 2015

I came back to check on this. A simple "k" wow really...It's rude to delete your post and before we get the rude or our special day comments, nobody was mean or rude. It's the etiquette board where we give out sound etiquette advice OP instead of validation for rudeness.