How should I have responded?

wandajune6 · April 2015

I work in a huge building on a floor that holds at least 150 companies (most of which are tiny), split across 4-5 offices. Today, I was stopped in the restroom by a woman I've seen before but doesn't share our office. She told me "you'd be pretty if you just wore some makeup."

I didn't know how to respond and just kinda nodded and ran away.

Admittedly, I don't always spend a lot of time on things like hair and makeup. Today, I just wore tinted sunscreen and hair in a ponytail. Given the casual atmosphere of my office, this works and is very common. This is how I usually look, though I clean myself up a lot more when there's a need.

She made me feel horrible. I feel hideous and also angry at myself for not putting her in her place. I'm also now wondering if I should be wearing a lot of makeup. I used to wear a lot when I had lots of skin issues. Now that my skin is clear (albeit freckles and kinda pink), I don't feel the need to cover myself. I'm not someone who takes joy in hair or makeup.

I told DH and he said the right things (I'm beautiful, she's an evil bitch) and my sister said the same.

How should I have responded? Are my feelings reasonable or should I treat this as useful feedback?

kmmssg · April 2015

How about, "what is wrong with the way I REALLY look?" Evil bitch.

theartistformerlyknownas · April 2015

"You'd be nice if you just kept your mouth shut."

Seriously though, people like that can't be helped. Just ignore her. You don't need makeup!

buttercup1958 · April 2015

Just ignore her! I bet you look awesome, people just love hearing themselves.

FiancB · April 2015

lolo883 said:
"You'd be nice if you just kept your mouth shut."

Seriously though, people like that can't be helped. Just ignore her. You don't need makeup!

Beat me to it. Or maybe you'd actually have friends if you kept your thoughts to yourself.

WTF is wrong with people? Stuff like this I just don't see how it could be a case of bad filter or foot-in-mouth, I think they generally have to be trying to be mean and they're unhinged.

I'm sure you look fine and that she would've said something similar if it had been Adriana Lima or whomever that ran into her at that moment.

beethery · April 2015

"The fact that you are a sagging anus would be a secret if you hadn't just told me."

blabla89 · April 2015

My response?

Do you wear glasses? The director of my department has this way of looking over her glasses and saying I beg your pardon and it can shut down anyone. That has become my go-to response when someone says something rude to me.

wandajune6 · April 2015

You're wonderful. All of you!

I know that it's horrible to say shit like that but it also gets under my skin.

Thank you for making me feel better- and validating my feelings.

And I'm so sad I didn't think of any of these responses at the time!

lurkergirl · April 2015

Just kidding

Violence is never the answer. Lolo's answer was perfect. I feel that's one of those perfect comebacks that pops into your head like 10 minutes after the insult.

KatieinBkln · April 2015

And you're an asshole. Oh, sorry, were we NOT playing the "cruel and obvious facts about strangers" game? My mistake.

MairePoppy · April 2015

'Makeup? Really? It doesn't do a thing for you.'

She'd probably spend the rest of the day checking herself in the mirror.

littlepep · April 2015

Don't let anyone tell you otherwise!

doeydo · April 2015

What a bitch. You're perfectly fine without makeup, just like any other person out there.

littlepep · April 2015

In all seriousness I probably would have said something like, I feel beautiful without makeup but thanks for your unwanted opinion.

KatieinBkln · April 2015

MairePoppy said:
'Makeup? Really? It doesn't do a thing for you.'
She'd probably spend the rest of the day checking herself in the mirror.

I LOVE THIS.

Wanda, I saw your AW photos--you're pretty full stop. Additionally, you are bomb.com, and you'd be 100 times the person this shallow turd is even if you had Sylvester Stallone's face.

JCbride2015 · April 2015

Ugh, what a gross human being.

"WHY would you say something like that?" probably would have popped out of my mouth. Not as eloquent as Lolo's response but gets the "You're a bitch" point across.

theartistformerlyknownas · April 2015

There's always "maybe if you ate some, you wouldn't be ugly on the inside."

arrippa · April 2015

Honestly, I probably wouldn't have said anything because of shock or humiliation but I would be thinking "'you are rude and then it would escalate to "you are such a bitch'' and then finally to "it sucks you need make up because I am fabulous without it.''

huskypuppy14 · April 2015

lolo883 said:
There's always "maybe if you ate some, you wouldn't be ugly on the inside."

I was thinking something similar. "Can't cover up ugly on the inside".

daria24 · April 2015

I probably wouldn't be able to stop myself from just blurting out "twatwaffle."

climbingsingle · April 2015

What a rude asshole! Screw her. I would have said, "Really? I think I look fantastic without it."

sophhabobopha · April 2015

EDITED TO FIX PIC

flutteringinfl · April 2015

Ugh I'm sorry you had to deal with that. If it had been me, I probably also would have been too shocked to say anything, because who the hell thinks that's an appropriate way to talk to people?

emmaaa · April 2015

It always amazes me what people think is okay to say to others.

No one should be made to feel like they need to wear make uP. I think it says more about her low self confidence than anything else since she thinks wearing make up is what can "improve" beauty.

novella1186 · April 2015

I'm sorry that woman was such a bitch to you, but she's 100% wrong. And while you could always apply make-up if you felt like it (you DO NOT NEED TO, you're gorgeous!) there's not a damn thing she can do to fix her ugly soul. So she's screwed.

I'm like you; I get caught off guard and can't think of what to say till later when it's too late. But it's a waste of time to anything to people like that anyway. But... maybe keep some of the PP's comebacks in mind JUST in case

wandajune6 · April 2015

You're all right. I'm still kicking myself a bit for not saying anything. I'm awful at quick comebacks.

She really was a bitch.

novella1186 · April 2015

wandajune6 said:
You're all right. I'm still kicking myself a bit for not saying anything. I'm awful at quick comebacks.

She really was a bitch.

I would honestly recommend writing her a super mean nasty letter with everything you want to say back to her, and then throw it in the garbage. Really.

I did in the past when someone was really mean to me and I never said anything back to them, and regretted not sticking up for myself. It gave me a huge sense of relief. I re-read the mean stuff I had written to them and it made me laugh, and I felt so much better.

TrixieJess · April 2015

My comeback would have been: "and you were so much smarter and prettier before you opened your mouth..."

Find her car and a tube of long wear lipstick in a garish colour and go to town...or not, I'm a bit of a vindictive bitch.

[Deleted User] · April 2015

Wowza. I do not understand why people feel the need to express their unwanted opinions, but like you, I wouldn't have been able to come up with anything to say, either.

Seriously, she was probably just annoyed that you looked perfectly beautiful without makeup, and wanted to make you question whether or not she was right. And she WASN'T. And like others have said, no amount of makeup can cover up her shitty attitude.

levioosa · April 2015

WTF is wrong with people. Lolo beat me to the response although I'm a huge fan of Marie Poppy's comeback too.

She's a bitch, don't listen to her and continue rocking your beautiful makeup-less self. It's not your fault she's so insecure about her own appearance she has to project the need for makeup on everyone else. And, um, rock that clear skin. I really wish my skin was clear enough to go without makeup (why, adult acne, why?!).

sophhabobopha · April 2015

lolo883 said:
There's always "maybe if you ate some, you wouldn't be ugly on the inside."

Damn that's good.

How should I have responded?

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