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FRIDAY

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Re: FRIDAY

  • edited April 2015
    @eilis1228 I totally would have reacted the same way to the invitation. Who the hell sends an invitation 7 months in advance?? Use a STD if you want people to put it on their calendar and then send an invite at the appropriate time. I'm a total Judgy McJudgerson bitch and I tell myself I need to be a nicer person. And then I'm still just mean.

    @lilackk28 I feel like I have so much to do too and I must be missing things that aren't on "the lists"! I went through every aspect of the wedding in my mind and thought of related things and made a list (I'm still farther out than you are). Like ceremony: I need to email officiant ideas for readings, DJ: pick first dance song, ceremony music, etc, Reception: look for guest book ideas, etc. Seems like you've got mostly everything!

    @phira I always get so overwhelmed doing major cleaning because I feel the same exact way! FI can't understand why all rooms are torn apart when I only planned on cleaning one room. The struggle is real.


    edit because I can never type correctly on TK!
     




  • @speakeasy glad to hear the surgery went well and I hope she is doing much better afterwards

    @lillack28 yeah I think 12 weeks is early but 7 months is WAY worse! There's just no need. We wanted people to be able to book rooms early too so we emailed, messaged, etc people to let them know about the block and how long it was good for. @eilis1228's friend could have sent STDs. There's no need for invites going out 7 months before the wedding. I hadn't even picked my invites out yet! I'm curious what this couple's RSVP date it.
     




  • @speakeasy14 - I'm glad your mom seems to be doing well!  Hope she has an easy recovery.
  • lilacck28lilacck28 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited April 2015
    @lavenderfields13 I was talking to @twodimes and realized that I know what song I want to walk down the aisle to (Pachebel's Canon in D), what song we want for first dance (Dream a little Dream by Mama Cass), and the song my dad wants for father/ daughter... but that's it! We haven't really picked music! Other than songs for the reception... I know I need to pick a recessional song. Are there other songs I've forgotten about? Anyone have good recessional song ideas? Preferably Upbeat classical/ instrumental? 

    OMHs.... did you guys do a seperate song for you (the bride) walking down the aisle than for the rest of the wedding party? Or just one song? 
  • A lot of people have such fun plans, yea!!

    We have nothing planned, I didn't even have to work but my mom asked me to go to the restaurant tonight and check in before close since we are having major staff issues. I swear the kids these days....Augh. So, I will bribe BF to take me and in return make him his favorite milkshake.

    Tomorrow is supposed to be gorgeous so I think we might take a walk along the river or drive to Lake Harriet in Minneapolis.

    Other than that, I plan to sleep and do whatever the eff I feel like! Woo hoo!

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  • @lavenderfields13 @eilis1228 WOA. Yeah. I totally missed the 7 months part of that. That's crazy. That's when we sent Save the Dates. 
  • RE: early invitations

    They definitely should have sent STDs. I didn't even mention the other things they had on there, including an RSVP deadline of August 31st for a Thanksgiving weekend wedding and a typed note with registry information and a gofundme for their honeymoon in Japan. My jaw dropped when I saw it. I tried to explain to FI that I've spent A LOT of time on TK researching how to properly host an event like this, so I do get a little catty when I see people blatantly disregard etiquette. He really had a good point though in not immediately being such a bitch about it. Their etiquette mistakes don't affect my life, and wedding planning is not a competition. At the end of the day, they're two socially awkward people who are happy and will be getting married regardless of their etiquette errors. We'll send a nice gift, laugh a bit to ourselves about it all, and decline the invitation since it's across the country 2 weeks after we get back from our honeymoon. 

    @speakeasy14 I'm so glad your mom is doing so well! 


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  • @eilis1228 WOW! I have seen some tacky stuff but that is right up there....
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  • lilacck28 haha judgment was for the ridiculously early invites (6+ in advance).  You're in the clear :)


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  • labrolabro member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    @eilis1228 We just got an invitation for a wedding at the end of July, with an RSVP date in late May. Definitely way too early on both counts....but I definitely feel like there is a lot of pressure from people to just send the invites out whenever (especially if you're having a lot of long-distance family attend) and there isn't a ton of support for waiting for the 6-8 weeks ahead of the event like etiquette says you should do. So I guess I can't really get mad at that part. I can feel annoyed with other faux pas though (like weird dress codes, cash bars, pleas for money, etc.).



  • edited April 2015
    @eilis1228 I wish I could take your FI's advice and just be nice but that's a whole lot of awful in one envelope!

    @lilacck28 I think those are all the major things you'd need to pick songs for. Is your Fi dancing with anyone? Are you having a big introduction- would you need a song for that? I've seen it suggested to pick songs for before the ceremony/cocktail hour but I don't have time for that- that's what I'm paying my DJ for. We haven't picked ANYTHING yet. I've had some ideas but I don't want traditional music for the processional and I don't know if it will be weird to have like..regular music..idk..
     




  • @bethsmiles haha I just sent her that cartoon, even if she is too loopy to see it right now
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  • lilacck28lilacck28 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited April 2015
    @lavenderfields13 FMIL is really... unsentimental. I've asked FI to ask her if she wants to do a dance. But he hasn't really gotten around to it because she gets snippy like "ugh, so annoying" about most wedding related things. Not in an awful rude way, just in a... she's not that interested way. It doesn't bother me the way it did at the beginning of the process, because now things are set in stone and I'm not worrying if she thinks its overkill to have a wedding party. 

    My dad thinks they're going to do their dance at the same time as we are (in his words: "The lyrics are perfect! We can start, and then M can start dancing with his mom, and then more people can join! It's the perfect song!" He wants to dance to "Sunrise, Sunset" from fiddler on the roof. And he wants the broadway version, because the other versions I found that I think sound a little less cheesy "are trully awful in comparison".... oh padre.... ), so there's always that option. 

    We're definitely avoiding a big introduction. 

    And I don't think it's weird to pick "regular" music for walking down the aisle. Just make sure to listen to the lyrics! There ARE some songs that are just... bad choices for happy occassions! Like, way back when, my parents told the band at their wedding that they liked the Beatles. So the band played "Yesterday" as their first dance song. OUCH.  
  • @Dignity100 - I LOVED Kinky Boots! Hope you guys have a blast!

    @speakeasy14 - I'm so glad to hear your mom's surgery went well!

    @bethsmiles - I'm not sure I've ever found a gall bladder adorable before. I can check that off the list now.

    -------------------------------------------

    I did not enjoy myself last night. Remember me being all stoked that my BF had FINALLY okayed a vacation package to Costa Rica? Well, I called the agent to see if we could get some cheaper rooms or something to save on cost. She sent me a modified itinerary that cost 400 bucks less per person. I was really happy with it and went to show BF. All of a sudden he claims that he didn't know I was booking anything, he didn't know it was so expensive, and he never gave me the go ahead on anything...... Ladies, I literally looked him right in the eye and asked "So you're saying that you're willing to spend the money on this? Cuz I'll book it if you are." To which he said "Yes."..... I was furious when he took it back, and got super upset because it feels like he's never willing to help plan the stuff, but won't agree with stuff I plan either. And then, apparently, when he does agree, he's not actually listening. I don't think this is the quitting smoking making me grumpy. I think he's just been a dick about the whole thing.

    This morning he asked me to e-mail him the new itinerary though. I think he's trying to get more involved. Even if just for a day.

    I get to spend tonight by myself, luckily. BF's grandma is in his hometown. We were supposed to spend the weekend with his family, but I tested my dog and found out he has giardia, so I'm not going to take him anywhere he'd be around other dogs. Tomorrow I'll head up in the morning, spend the day going to some NW Wildlife park with his family, and then a tulip farm. Sunday, I will probably be lazy.

  • @AlPacina - You can buy a little stuffed Gallbladder from their (awkward yeti) site. And I have been tempted to! He's so cute.


  • @lillack28 FI has an OVERLY sentimental mom lol and definitely wants to dance with him and will be a big blubbery mess the whole day. If your FI isn't too interested either than that works!
    My dad wants a sappy song to dance to with me. I am very emotional but I just don't want a super emotional song. He likes "My Little Girl" by Tim McGraw. I like the song, and no offense to anyone using it but it just feels so played out to me. I like "In my Life" by the Beatles- my dad loves the Beatles or "Wildflowers" by Tom Petty. My mom said those songs don't have enough meaning in the lyrics. Ugh. I don't know what I'll end up using- I do want my dad to like the song so I'll probably compromise.

    @alpacina sounds like your BF is being a dick. My FI gets the same way. He won't give a straight answer on something or he changes his mind all the time. Like he'll like an idea I have and agree to it and then the next week it's an awful idea and he's not doing it. Drives me nuts. He has issues.
     




  • @Swazzle AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH That's awesome! TAKE SO MANY PICTURES! and, of course, AW them all! 
  • @swazzle That sounds like an amazing trip!
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  • labrolabro member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    @Swazzle YAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!! Share ALL the details when you know more! Are you going to go on another safari???? The lions of SA miss you!



  • @swazzle that sounds like an awesome deal and vacation! I am going to live vicariously through you now.
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  • @Bethsmiles I love that cartoon! I got my gallbladder out around this time last year. Too funny!!

    @Swazzle Color me jealous! I so want to go there some day. I will have you be my travel agent at said time!
    friends tv show funy
  • @swazzle that's so exciting!!! I'm super jealous! I can't wait to hear more details!
  • @allusive007 - That is SO nice! You are absolutely adorable :)



  • AuroraRose41AuroraRose41 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited April 2015
    @Imcooper86 your centerpieces look gorgeous! 

    @allusive007 I hope your baby shower is wonderful! 

    @eilis1228 I had a similar revelation this week. I'm doing this new thing where I try not to snark as much as I possibly can even if there are glaring etiquette issues. I might tell someone politely (either online or in real life) how guests reacted to an etiquette issue at a wedding I have attended in hopes of changing their mind, but I am going to try to be less judgy overall. But I still slip sometimes, and sending invitations 7 months in advance is uncalled for. 

    @swazzle that's amazing! I cannot wait to hear all about it! 

    Re: early invitations on a semi related note. I know this is technically against etiquette, but I have so many people asking me about the date of our wedding that I am considering sending out StD's a bit early. I'm really trying to wait until 12 months out at the earliest (what etiquette dictates), but I feel like everyone will know the date already by that point anyways the way things are going. Is it really that much of a faux pas to send them out early? We have everything set in stone. Invitations will be sent at a reasonable time (8 ish weeks out), but we have people traveling from all over and I want to give them plenty of notice. 

    ETF: poeple (fixed it to people).....I'm dying. I'm not sure why that is so funny but it is (probably has something to do with lack of sleep). Anyways, I feel like sending out StD's early is rather victimless, but I am not sure.

  • Oh my gosh @allusive007 it looks like it was great! And I second @swazzle's comment :)

  • eilis1228eilis1228 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited April 2015
    @AuroraRose41 I totally understand. It's hard not to get judgey, especially after hanging on TK for so long and being immersed in etiquette, but I think FI made a good point. He also told me to put myself in their shoes and think about how I would feel if someone were making fun of my wedding. I really did feel like such a jerk. As for your STDs, I don't really think it's a huge issue to send more than a year out, but I'd be more afraid that people would lose them/forget the date. I'd either wait for the one-year mark, or wait and send them when airlines publish flights for your wedding weekend. 

    @allusive007 OH MY GOSH! That is so sweet of your coworkers! What a fun shower!


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