I think we're all looking a little too much into the word "lady."
Do y'all refuse to use the "ladies" restroom because you don't like the connotation of the word? Unless you're a man and don't use the ladies restroom, then that makes sense.
Nope! But that doesn't stop me thinking it's a stupid loaded needlessly gendered word to use for a baby shower.
I think everyone is getting a little carried away. I think we all know @Jenna8984 well enough to know that she wouldn't intentionally use a belittling phrase.
I think everyone is getting a little carried away. I think we all know @Jenna8984 well enough to know that she wouldn't intentionally use a belittling phrase.
The thing is though, when someone's like "hey, you got some sexism going on here" you can either be like "oops my bad! Don't want to do that" OR "nuh-huh my middle of the night idea is obvi perfect how dare you you're wrong."
I think everyone is getting a little carried away. I think we all know @Jenna8984 well enough to know that she wouldn't intentionally use a belittling phrase.
This. And Jenna, I think it's cute, but I'm in the "OMG I want to have a baby" phase so I think anything remotely relating to babies is adorable. I don't think anybody you'd invite to your hypothetical baby shower would be offended by your use of the word "lady" in that context.
I think everyone is getting a little carried away. I think we all know @Jenna8984 well enough to know that she wouldn't intentionally use a belittling phrase.
The thing is though, when someone's like "hey, you got some sexism going on here" you can either be like "oops my bad! Don't want to do that" OR "nuh-huh my middle of the night idea is obvi perfect how dare you you're wrong."
Ok, I get that. But Jenna has said she was wrong. And you have educated her on the different uses of "lady." It seems like you are beating a dead horse.
I think everyone is getting a little carried away. I think we all know @Jenna8984 well enough to know that she wouldn't intentionally use a belittling phrase.
The thing is though, when someone's like "hey, you got some sexism going on here" you can either be like "oops my bad! Don't want to do that" OR "nuh-huh my middle of the night idea is obvi perfect how dare you you're wrong."
I never said it was a perfect idea, clearly by the responses most people don't like it. I also never said you're wrong, I said it has other meanings of which my intentions were.
I think everyone is getting a little carried away. I think we all know @Jenna8984 well enough to know that she wouldn't intentionally use a belittling phrase.
The thing is though, when someone's like "hey, you got some sexism going on here" you can either be like "oops my bad! Don't want to do that" OR "nuh-huh my middle of the night idea is obvi perfect how dare you you're wrong."
I never said it was a perfect idea, clearly by the responses most people don't like it. I also never said you're wrong, I said it has other meanings of which my intentions were.
I would assume it would be pretty clear when talking about a fetus that you're using "lady" as in female, as opposed to a submissive, dress-wearing, pearl-clutching doormat.
I think we're all looking a little too much into the word "lady."
Do y'all refuse to use the "ladies" restroom because you don't like the connotation of the word? Unless you're a man and don't use the ladies restroom, then that makes sense.
Seriously. We can't use the word lady now either. Give me a break.
Many people have started threads that say "Hey Ladies, what do you think about X?" Not sure why it's now a problem.
Jenna, I don't see it as any worse than some of the barf worthy things written on other baby shower invitations. PP gave reasons why it's probably best not to. You want sports related stuff over the necessities?
I think everyone is getting a little carried away. I think we all know @Jenna8984 well enough to know that she wouldn't intentionally use a belittling phrase.
The thing is though, when someone's like "hey, you got some sexism going on here" you can either be like "oops my bad! Don't want to do that" OR "nuh-huh my middle of the night idea is obvi perfect how dare you you're wrong."
I never said it was a perfect idea, clearly by the responses most people don't like it. I also never said you're wrong, I said it has other meanings of which my intentions were.
I thought it was funny. I also didn't even bat an eye at the term "lady," but the connotation is something to be aware of. As Lacquered pointed out, I generally associate "lady" with royalty, but it can certainly be condescending.
Back to OP's original point - If I received a shower invite like this in the mail, I would chuckle in that "oh god this is so cheesy but cute" way. It should probably be noted that I am a big fan of cheesy stuff.
ETA: The sports-themed invite would not make me buy sports-themed gifts, though. I'm not a sports person, so even though the invite was sports-themed, buying those kinds of gifts just wouldn't cross my mind.
I think we're all looking a little too much into the word "lady."
Do y'all refuse to use the "ladies" restroom because you don't like the connotation of the word? Unless you're a man and don't use the ladies restroom, then that makes sense.
Seriously. We can't use the word lady now either. Give me a break.
Many people have started threads that say "Hey Ladies, what do you think about X?" Not sure why it's now a problem.
Jenna, I don't see it as any worse than some of the barf worthy things written on other baby shower invitations. PP gave reasons why it's probably best not to. You want sports related stuff over the necessities?
Another thing to think about is that there is only so much sports related stuff for babies. I think you would get a ton of duplicates.
I think we're all looking a little too much into the word "lady."
Do y'all refuse to use the "ladies" restroom because you don't like the connotation of the word? Unless you're a man and don't use the ladies restroom, then that makes sense.
Seriously. We can't use the word lady now either. Give me a break.
Many people have started threads that say "Hey Ladies, what do you think about X?" Not sure why it's now a problem.
Jenna, I don't see it as any worse than some of the barf worthy things written on other baby shower invitations. PP gave reasons why it's probably best not to. You want sports related stuff over the necessities?
Good point. No, not at all. I just noticed most of the showers I attend people love giving clothes because they think they are so cute. So sure, I'd think a Patriots onesie is adorable but I'd in no way expect them or turn away other items, or be ungrateful for other items! Guess it is best to just leave that alone/in my head and buy a few for myself!
I think we're all looking a little too much into the word "lady."
Do y'all refuse to use the "ladies" restroom because you don't like the connotation of the word? Unless you're a man and don't use the ladies restroom, then that makes sense.
Seriously. We can't use the word lady now either. Give me a break.
Many people have started threads that say "Hey Ladies, what do you think about X?" Not sure why it's now a problem.
Jenna, I don't see it as any worse than some of the barf worthy things written on other baby shower invitations. PP gave reasons why it's probably best not to. You want sports related stuff over the necessities?
Good point. No, not at all. I just noticed most of the showers I attend people love giving clothes because they think they are so cute. So sure, I'd think a Patriots onesie is adorable but I'd in no way expect them or turn away other items, or be ungrateful for other items! Guess it is best to just leave that alone/in my head and buy a few for myself!
In my experience with attending baby showers, if people know you're a fan of a certain team, they'll get you stuff. Ridiculously adorable stuff. The last one I went to, the parents were fans of University of Wyoming and they got so many ridiculous items... including hand crocheted baby hockey skates in UW colors.
It's not weird to think about names. That's a pretty big and fun part of having a child. They will most likely have that name forever. Unless you name them la-a and they change it when they're older.
Thinking of shower invites (when you shouldn't even be planning your own shower) and then asking for opinions about it is weird. Sorry girl.
I had a bunch of boy baby names picked out from when I was in High School that I liked. We couldn't use any of them because they didn't got with FI's last name. The point is, you can plan all you want for a future child, but the reality may end up being completely different than you expect!
Guys. I've been looking at baby names since I was 13.
I am super thankful I'm a writer. I do not think my body could handle the number of babies I would have to pump out to be able to use all the names I love, even if I did names like Cora Elaine Nicolette Stella Kieran Michelle Lastname.
ETA I'm glad this took a turn I could comment on. Because I'm not a fan of poems in any situation, frankly. ...and the rhythm was off on the OP's poem. And it bothered me.
I think everyone is getting a little carried away. I think we all know @Jenna8984 well enough to know that she wouldn't intentionally use a belittling phrase.
You mean like those times that she made racist comments or classless suicide jokes?
Guys. I've been looking at baby names since I was 13.
I am super thankful I'm a writer. I do not think my body could handle the number of babies I would have to pump out to be able to use all the names I love, even if I did names like Cora Elaine Nicolette Stella Kieran Michelle Lastname.
ETA I'm glad this took a turn I could comment on. Because I'm not a fan of poems in any situation, frankly. ...and the rhythm was off on the OP's poem. And it bothered me.
This is 100% hypothetical since I'm not even pregnant. But when I am (hopefully) one day, I'd like to not find out the sex. I know how we feel about rhyming stuff being stupid, but how you do feel about something like this on a baby shower invitation?
Little lady or little man?
Either way- a Patriots/ Bruins fan!
I'd love if people got sports related stuff/clothes instead of the 2 generic options at baby stores. Or is that too tacky to write? Not even trying to get ahead of myself, I just think of really weird fucking shit when I can't sleep at 4am haha
You left out the Red Sox.
Make it lady and gentleman to even it up.
ETA I would not be offended that you suggested any sports related items for gifts because 1. guests aren't required to shop from the registry and 2. I would assume that you have purchased the necessities.
I'm not really a fan of poems like this. I know it's not exactly the same, but it's kind of akin to wedding shower invites where they try to come up with a cutesy way of asking for gift cards or lingerie or something.
You could do a sports team them, but as far as gifts, you'll probably want necessities. If/When you get pregnant. And if someone offers to throw you a shower. And if they ask for your input on a theme.
Guys. I've been looking at baby names since I was 13.
I am super thankful I'm a writer. I do not think my body could handle the number of babies I would have to pump out to be able to use all the names I love, even if I did names like Cora Elaine Nicolette Stella Kieran Michelle Lastname.
ETA I'm glad this took a turn I could comment on. Because I'm not a fan of poems in any situation, frankly. ...and the rhythm was off on the OP's poem. And it bothered me.
LOL omg you bully!!
(not really truly relevant but I DIED laughing at it so.)
I do think that "little lady" was a poor choice. All I can conjure up is some cowboy tipping his hat to the "little lady" he just saved. I would never, ever want my daughter relegated to "damsel" status. I don't think it's a problem to use "lady" in other situations (I love it when FI calls me "his lady") but I think it's just too heavily gendered, especially in that particular phrasing, to use flippantly. You know?
Jenna asked for our opinions. I gave my opinion. Call me a hairy legged man hating feminazi for it if you want, but it's my fucking opinion. Which is what she asked for.
My problem is not the world lady in and of itself. For instance using @laquredlover's post as an example had it said "Lord or Lady what will it be", wouldn't have had the same loaded meaning to me.
The problem is it's Lady vs. MAN. A girl is a lady. A boy is a man. That MEANS something. Little lady or little gentleman is on the way, less of a problem. Still weird cause they're babies and babies are not ladies or gentleman. Ladies and gentleman do not shit their pants at the dining table. Babies do.
But see if the baby is boy he gets to be a man. We all know what being a man in our society means. It means he can play sports, he can like cars, date girls, have any job he wants, have kids, or not have kids, get married, or stay single, earn more money, and in general be better. He is a man and the world is his oyster.
If the baby is a girl she is a lady. Ladies sit quietly, don't make a ruckus, look nice, behave themselves, marry nice boys, and have nice babies. Because they are ladies.
But see if the baby is boy he gets to be a man. We all know what being a man in our society means. It means he can play sports, he can like cars, date girls, have any job he wants, have kids, or not have kids, get married, or stay single, earn more money, and in general be better. He is a man and the world is his oyster.
If the baby is a girl she is a lady. Ladies sit quietly, don't make a ruckus, look nice, behave themselves, marry nice boys, and have nice babies. Because they are ladies.
Honest question, but can anything be said for the fact that she was musing over a sports-themed shower for her (admittedly nonexistent) child, whether or not it was a boy or girl? I think that itself shows that she isn't looking for her "little lady" to live in a word of bubblegum pink and daisies an unicorns.
Jenna asked for our opinions. I gave my opinion. Call me a hairy legged man hating feminazi for it if you want, but it's my fucking opinion. Which is what she asked for.
My problem is not the world lady in and of itself. For instance using @laquredlover's post as an example had it said "Lord or Lady what will it be", wouldn't have had the same loaded meaning to me.
The problem is it's Lady vs. MAN. A girl is a lady. A boy is a man. That MEANS something. Little lady or little gentleman is on the way, less of a problem. Still weird cause they're babies and babies are not ladies or gentleman. Ladies and gentleman do not shit their pants at the dining table. Babies do.
But see if the baby is boy he gets to be a man. We all know what being a man in our society means. It means he can play sports, he can like cars, date girls, have any job he wants, have kids, or not have kids, get married, or stay single, earn more money, and in general be better. He is a man and the world is his oyster.
If the baby is a girl she is a lady. Ladies sit quietly, don't make a ruckus, look nice, behave themselves, marry nice boys, and have nice babies. Because they are ladies.
I get that. So if it was "lady or gentleman," or "man or woman" or "boy or girl," that would mean something different to you?
LADIES! Lets not get carried away here. @Jenna8984 is a cool person. I understand getting ahead of myself when contemplating all the exciting things ahead, hell I do this all the freaking time (especially when I should be studying instead). She was just "thinking out loud", people do this on this forum all the time, no? Its not like she sent out these invitations last night.
Jenna, I'd probably agree that you'd want more practical stuff for your shower. The patriots onesie could be something you/ your husband/ close friends would get you "just because". Also, best wishes!
- The stars, like dust, encircle me in living mists of light. And all of space I seem to see in one vast burst of sight.
Re: Cute or tacky?
Ok, I get that. But Jenna has said she was wrong. And you have educated her on the different uses of "lady." It seems like you are beating a dead horse.
FWIW, I call my son Little Dude.
I would assume it would be pretty clear when talking about a fetus that you're using "lady" as in female, as opposed to a submissive, dress-wearing, pearl-clutching doormat.
haha