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nwr...nervous as hell

Chipmunk415Chipmunk415 member
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in Chit Chat
Fucking hell, I think I might be pregnant.

I went off the pill for 2 months due to pharmacy screw ups. Dh and I havent exactly been careful. I'm 5 weeks post my last cycle.

Dont get me wrong, I want children and I have great respect for those ttc and those exploring additional options. but idk if I'm ready for this. And now we are getting ready to move and me getting a promotion at work in September. I'm terrified at the prospect of being a mom so soon.

Dh is aware of the possibility, and has admitted a hope that I'm in fact carrying. I want to give him children, but im afraid of being a poor parent. In the interim, any thoughts or hugs while I wait for proof as to whether I'm pregnant are appreciated.
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Re: nwr...nervous as hell

  • JaniV123JaniV123 member
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    relax and try not to loose your head. Breathe and go get a test at the pharmacy and/or go to get the urine test at the lab. Whatever the outcome it will be ok, and you have options and time to decide what is the best course of action. 

    lots of hugs and
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  • falsarafalsara member
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    It's perfectly natural to be nervous.  Take a breath and just calm down until you find out.  No matter what, you guys will handle everything together.  And I sincerely doubt that you could ever be a poor parent.

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  • chibiyuichibiyui member
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    Relax, breathe, and take a test. If the test is negative, have a drink, and test once a week until you get a positive or your period. 

    And if you are pregnant. You got this. And I for one welcome more evil chipmunks in the world.

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  • themuffinman16themuffinman16 member
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    jacques27 said:

    Chipmunk415 said:

    Fucking hell, I think I might be pregnant.

    I went off the pill for 2 months due to pharmacy screw ups. Dh and I havent exactly been careful. I'm 5 weeks post my last cycle.

    Dont get me wrong, I want children and I have great respect for those ttc and those exploring additional options. but idk if I'm ready for this. And now we are getting ready to move and me getting a promotion at work in September. I'm terrified at the prospect of being a mom so soon.

    Dh is aware of the possibility, and has admitted a hope that I'm in fact carrying. I want to give him children, but im afraid of being a poor parent. In the interim, any thoughts or hugs while I wait for proof as to whether I'm pregnant are appreciated.

    1.  There are also lots of things that can cause a not regular cycle.  Going off BC is one.  Stress is another (I had a freak out once when a particularly stressful time in my life resulted in being 10 days later than usual).  Granted, pregnancy is another.  Figure out which one it is before you put in too much time worrying.

    2.  Regarding the bolded - that's pretty normal.  I know there are people who are like "Yup, I always wanted to be a mom and knew that was going to happen."  But even of those people, I know of no one who went "I am totally going to rock this parent thing.  I've got this sh*t down cold."  No.  There's always the fear that you're not going to be good enough, or you're going to irreparably screw up your child, or that it's just going to be so freaking hard.  No amount of being ready is ever going to take that fear completely away.  That fear is a sign you care.  And caring is never a bad thing.  And if you are pregnant, then you'll figure it out along the way, just like everything else in life.  You weren't just born with the innate ability to ride a bike, drive a car, bake a cake, or do whatever your job is.  You learned how to do those things and figured it out along the way.  It's the same thing with parenting.

    SITB
    I don't think anyone could have put it better than you just did.

    @Chipmunk415 your cycle could be all wonky from switching up birth control. Breath, take the piss challenge. Whatever the results are, I believe you can handle it. You are very level headed, and even if you get pregnant a little earlier than anticipated , I think it will all work out.
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  • sarahuflsarahufl member
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    I hope you get the result you want, but "not being careful" isn't the best way to avoid pregnancy. 
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  • STARMOON44STARMOON44 member
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    Fingers crossed! And maybe once this is sorted ask yourself why, if you're terrified of being pregnant, you weren't careful.
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  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
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    Hugs Chipmunk. 
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  • luckya23luckya23 member
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    This sounds similar to the place I was in the last couple months.

    I'm sure you knew this was a possibility with the "not being careful" so I'm guessing you didn't mind the chance of being pregnant so much when it was not SO RIGHT THERE OMG MAYBE IT DID HAPPEN!  You probably knew it would be fine, and you're just having a bit of a freak out at the reality of the situation.  Totally normal, IMO!

    When I was off BC, I had bleeding days in the middle of the month, so the transition to being off is also very likely to screw with your cycle.  My doctor told me it was due to stress I was bleeding but whatever, at the time I wasn't very stressed at all!  He claims I just didn't realize it, and I was being completely irresponsible anyway and to get back on BC ASAP, because condoms "aren't at all reliable." 

    I'm sure it will be fine, but you can test now, right?



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  • sarahuflsarahufl member
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    Listen, I am not shaming people for having sex. Just saying that you had to know it was a possibility.

    If you weren't ready for that possibility, you need to plan accordingly.


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  • ChemFanatic25ChemFanatic25 member
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    Boy these threads seem to derail more quickly more often now. Need to slow that down a bit.

     

    **HUGS Chipmunk and thoughts!** My best friend got pregnant WAAAYYYY before they were planning on it because of a similar situation. She did not express fears like you did but it still was a bit scary for them. They now have a beautiful baby girl and although their life plan went off course they are still very happy. If you are pregnant, congratulations and I am sure you will be a wonderful parent. If you are not pregnant, congratulations, things will be a little bit more planned then a surprise pregnancy.

     

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  • littlepeplittlepep member
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    When I went off BC, my period got all wonky too. I had a few months where it would be late. 5 weeks isn't too long so there's still a possibility that you're just late. 

    If you are pregnant though, you will figure out the parenthood thing as you go. I totally get the scared feeling, and I think most people feel that way. TBH though no one knows what they are doing as a first-time parent. It's one of those things you learn by doing. 
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  • JCbride2015JCbride2015 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    Chipmunk, you totally got this. You are going to be an AWESOME mom, whether that happens this year or next year or five years down the road. And @luckya23 said it well: you probably knew you'd be an awesome mom when it was a little more abstract, you just need to adjust to it as a concrete idea. You're going to be fine.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments First Answer
    To add to my previous comment - FI and I got pregnant before we were engaged.  While I was on BC, it definitely wasn't planned. Our initial reaction was a mix of nerves, scared, and oh shit.

    After some time to digest, the nerves subsided and excitement set in.  

    A lot of parenting is experimenting to figure out what best meets the needs of your family.  Don't be too hard on yourself!  If anyone tells you they weren't nervous about becoming a parent, they're lying to you.

    Hugs, keep us posted!


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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    500 Comments 250 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    I agree with PPs, you might not be pregnant, but if you are you still have time to decide what is best for you. And it is TOTALLY normal to be scared. I can't speak from experience, but I can say that my parents did not even remotely plan on having kids at all until I gave them the surprise of their lifetime. I know they just about lost their shit, but I am supposedly the best surprise ever so...Sometimes things just happen. Even the most well-planned pregnancy will be scary. No matter what, I am sure you will be a wonderful mother when and if you decide to become one. 
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  • sarahuflsarahufl member
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    ashley8918 said:

    Appropriate response to a terrified woman who might be accident pregnant: "Breathe. It is okay. You can do this. But if you don't want to do this, you have options."


    Inappropriate response to a terrified woman who might be accident pregnant: "Well, it's your own damn fault, stupid!"

    You are entitled to your thoughts as I am entitled to mine. And I never called her stupid.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
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    edited June 2015
    .
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  • sarahuflsarahufl member
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    pinkrevenge said:

    sarahufl said:

    ashley8918 said:

    Appropriate response to a terrified woman who might be accident pregnant: "Breathe. It is okay. You can do this. But if you don't want to do this, you have options."


    Inappropriate response to a terrified woman who might be accident pregnant: "Well, it's your own damn fault, stupid!"

    You are entitled to your thoughts as I am entitled to mine. And I never called her stupid.
    No, you just implied it with your "That's what you get" tone, which OMG that's how babby is formed? Thanks, Captain Obvious. So helpful!
    Wait, it isn't how babies are formed? Now I am all confused.
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  • ashley8918ashley8918 member
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    sarahufl said:

    ashley8918 said:

    Appropriate response to a terrified woman who might be accident pregnant: "Breathe. It is okay. You can do this. But if you don't want to do this, you have options."


    Inappropriate response to a terrified woman who might be accident pregnant: "Well, it's your own damn fault, stupid!"

    You are entitled to your thoughts as I am entitled to mine. And I never called her stupid.
    Sure, but like, maybe keep those thoughts to yourself if they serve no purpose but to belittle someone who is scared?

    You don't need to say the word "stupid" in order for the implication to be loud and clear. Pointing out a totally fucking obvious thing, that the OP is pretty clearly not unaware of serves no purpose but to tell her that she is stupid/what she did is stupid. She knows how babies work. Hop off.
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