Is this rude? Receiving line question

Jen4948 · May 2015

thisismynickname said:

Jen4948 said:

japlanet said:

lovegood90 said:

japlanet said:
Ok, I get why my original idea is not appropriate. There is no 'exit' to our ceremony space, it is one and the same (garden) as the space for the cocktail hour.

I don't like the idea of artificially lining up my guests for a receiving line, and I also don't want to stand between them and the food/drinks. Table visits don't work because our tables are three long harvest tables, and walking between them will be awkward and we will get in the way of our serving staff. Just visiting the ends of each table (20 people long) mean that we will miss most of the people in the middle of the tables.

Any other ideas how we can be sure to greet and thank each of our guests?
I don't see at all how table visits would be awkward. Just wait until people have been served and go up to them. This doesn't have to be complicated.
Because the tables are 20 people long and we can't walk between them without blocking everyone else from serving the food or getting up to walk to the bathroom etc. Also we are doing a 5 course meal so there is no 'when everyone has been served' since there are 5 courses to be served.
Just tell the staff not to serve while you are doing table visits. Then wait for them to serve the main course, and do table visits then.
Ooo, I wouldn't do that. People don't want to sit and starve. Just navigate around the wait staff.

I think you misread. My suggestion was that the OP and her FI should do the table visits after the main course is served, not before, during which time there's no reason why guests can't eat what they've been served. However, the staff would be asked to not serve the next course to whichever table is being visited at any given moment. As soon as the couple moves on from that table, the staff would then resume service to that table.

thisismynickname2 · May 2015

Jen4948 said:

thisismynickname said:

Jen4948 said:

japlanet said:

lovegood90 said:

japlanet said:
Ok, I get why my original idea is not appropriate. There is no 'exit' to our ceremony space, it is one and the same (garden) as the space for the cocktail hour.

I don't like the idea of artificially lining up my guests for a receiving line, and I also don't want to stand between them and the food/drinks. Table visits don't work because our tables are three long harvest tables, and walking between them will be awkward and we will get in the way of our serving staff. Just visiting the ends of each table (20 people long) mean that we will miss most of the people in the middle of the tables.

Any other ideas how we can be sure to greet and thank each of our guests?
I don't see at all how table visits would be awkward. Just wait until people have been served and go up to them. This doesn't have to be complicated.
Because the tables are 20 people long and we can't walk between them without blocking everyone else from serving the food or getting up to walk to the bathroom etc. Also we are doing a 5 course meal so there is no 'when everyone has been served' since there are 5 courses to be served.
Just tell the staff not to serve while you are doing table visits. Then wait for them to serve the main course, and do table visits then.
Ooo, I wouldn't do that. People don't want to sit and starve. Just navigate around the wait staff.
I think you misread. My suggestion was that the OP and her FI should do the table visits after the main course is served, not before, during which time there's no reason why guests can't eat what they've been served. However, the staff would be asked to not serve the next course to whichever table is being visited at any given moment. As soon as the couple moves on from that table, the staff would then resume service to that table.

Oh, gotcha.

But still, it depends on the number of courses. I think the OP said 5 courses? So salad, soup, intermezzo, main, dessert (if it's like mine). I was able to visit tables after salad and soup. I don't think table visits would start after the main course if it's second to last. Also, if they're having a choice of entrees, the wait staff shouldn't just stand there waiting for the happy couple to leave. They're not going to turn around and find someone else who needed the steak. In many places wait staff are highly coordinated. If my steak arrived a little colder or I just sat there seeing my dish was almost in front of me because someone at my table wouldn't stop yapping to the bride, I'd be rather annoyed.

I see what you're saying, but still don't think it's a good idea. I think OP can navigate around wait staff if she needs to.

Jen4948 · May 2015

thisismynickname said:

Jen4948 said:

thisismynickname said:

Jen4948 said:

japlanet said:

lovegood90 said:

japlanet said:
Ok, I get why my original idea is not appropriate. There is no 'exit' to our ceremony space, it is one and the same (garden) as the space for the cocktail hour.

I don't like the idea of artificially lining up my guests for a receiving line, and I also don't want to stand between them and the food/drinks. Table visits don't work because our tables are three long harvest tables, and walking between them will be awkward and we will get in the way of our serving staff. Just visiting the ends of each table (20 people long) mean that we will miss most of the people in the middle of the tables.

Any other ideas how we can be sure to greet and thank each of our guests?
I don't see at all how table visits would be awkward. Just wait until people have been served and go up to them. This doesn't have to be complicated.
Because the tables are 20 people long and we can't walk between them without blocking everyone else from serving the food or getting up to walk to the bathroom etc. Also we are doing a 5 course meal so there is no 'when everyone has been served' since there are 5 courses to be served.
Just tell the staff not to serve while you are doing table visits. Then wait for them to serve the main course, and do table visits then.
Ooo, I wouldn't do that. People don't want to sit and starve. Just navigate around the wait staff.
I think you misread. My suggestion was that the OP and her FI should do the table visits after the main course is served, not before, during which time there's no reason why guests can't eat what they've been served. However, the staff would be asked to not serve the next course to whichever table is being visited at any given moment. As soon as the couple moves on from that table, the staff would then resume service to that table.
Oh, gotcha.
But still, it depends on the number of courses. I think the OP said 5 courses? So salad, soup, intermezzo, main, dessert (if it's like mine). I was able to visit tables after salad and soup. I don't think table visits would start after the main course if it's second to last. Also, if they're having a choice of entrees, the wait staff shouldn't just stand there waiting for the happy couple to leave. They're not going to turn around and find someone else who needed the steak. In many places wait staff are highly coordinated. If my steak arrived a little colder or I just sat there seeing my dish was almost in front of me because someone at my table wouldn't stop yapping to the bride, I'd be rather annoyed.
I see what you're saying, but still don't think it's a good idea. I think OP can navigate around wait staff if she needs to.

She probably could, but it seems easiest to just ask wait staff to hold off on serving any table for the few minutes she and her FI are visiting that table, and then resume after she and her FI move on.

japlanet · May 2015

Thanks everyone.

Tables have 2 sides, so 20 people long = 40 people per table, about 120 guests total plus BP+dates who will be at the head table.

I am meeting with the caterer this weekend again and I will see what they and the venue coordinator think about table visits. If they advise against them (the venue set up looks not unlike the dining hall at Hogwarts if that helps to see why it may not work), we will just have to make the effort to ensure that we greet/thank all the guests with a combination of receiving line and visits at cocktail hour.

ETA: Here is a pic of the venue set up similar to what ours will be

Jen4948 · May 2015

Ok, yeah, I can see why you wouldn't want to do table visits.

But then you need to do a receiving line. The only thing is that you have to stand up to greet your guests, not sit on a couch while your guests have to stand on line.

lyndausvi · May 2015

japlanet said:
Thanks everyone.

Tables have 2 sides, so 20 people long = 40 people per table, about 120 guests total plus BP+dates who will be at the head table.

I am meeting with the caterer this weekend again and I will see what they and the venue coordinator think about table visits. If they advise against them (the venue set up looks not unlike the dining hall at Hogwarts if that helps to see why it may not work), we will just have to make the effort to ensure that we greet/thank all the guests with a combination of receiving line and visits at cocktail hour.

ETA: Here is a pic of the venue set up similar to what ours will be

I worked a wedding with a similar setup. They also had a lounge area setup. I would say they had about 110-130 guests.

I observed the bride and groom walking around the tables talking to people. Talking to people in lounge area. They had a buffet I saw the groom talking to people over there too. Bars area always good spots to greet people.

Again, it's your responsibility to greet ALL of your guests. How you accomplish that task is up to you. Most people (including myself) end up doing various different ways to greet them all.

SP29 · May 2015

I would still do a receiving line at the end of the ceremony service. When you recess out you can pick a spot to stand in the cocktail space and guests will come to you.

Wait- if your ceremony and cocktail reception are in the same space, what is happening to the chair set up from the ceremony? If there is a period of time where guests need to stay out of the way for a few minutes while chairs get moved, this is an excellent time to create a receiving line off to the side of the space, and guests will get it. Standing between the ceremony space and the bar/ food tables is also a good option, as people will generally navigate that way.

Is this rude? Receiving line question

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