We are planning our wedding and will be paying for the majority of it ourselves. I have a couple of etiquette questions and I'm a little afraid to ask because I see some people get taken to the cleaners, but I am in need of help and would prefer asking you all as opposed to asking friends and possibly offend someone without meaning to.
1. I am from another state but have lived in Colorado for 7 years. FI has lived here most of his life. We had planned on having a small wedding with mostly just people from Colorado attending. (If I start inviting people from out of state it will be a ridiculous number and I don't want anyone to feel obligated to try to fly out here, rent a car, rent a hotel, etc.) However, people are now mentioning that they can't wait to come to my wedding. I don't discuss it on facebook and have asked my bridesmaids not to do so either. How do I politely say, "We're keeping it small and in-state."
2. The venue is not actually a hotel but a time-share. We live in Denver but are getting married in Estes Park so most people will want to get rooms. We were only able to secure ten rooms (which includes ours) at the venue. Should I block another set of rooms at another hotel and hope that people fill them? Or just give out names of hotels in the area?
3. The dreaded cash bar...we were thinking of hosting a cocktail hour (which apparently is very much the norm here) and then either going cash bar or hosting a wine/beer bar and guests can pay for alcohol beyond that. My question is: should we not host the cocktail hour at all? Is it worse to host for a short period of time or have no bar at all?
4. Is a candy bar considered enough of a favor for guests? Or should I also do favors?
I feel like my head is spinning from too much etiquette reading. I don't want to offend and have found that I may be offending people without realizing it. *sigh*