Im asking this on behalf of my MOH. I really didnt know the answer or what to expect from my one BM who is my FI bff and she is in the wedding I'm friends with her as well but shes not my BFF. So my shower is taking place in NY and the BM lives in Florida so she wont be attending mind you my one from Cali will be attending and helping out fully. My MOH asked if she thought the girl who wasnt coming was going to pitch in at least something...I really had no idea and my FI said good luck...to me if I was in a wedding and couldnt attend a shower I would still throw in at least 100 bux or at least offer up something. Mind you my MOH has email/FB messaged everyone all the same info asking for ideas and what everyones thoughts are and what have you and she hasnt even responded to anything. So i nicely just asked if she had gotten the messages just to be sure. I just found it kind of rude she couldnt even respond to anything. Thats besides the point question is woud you all chip in if you coukdnt go on something>? thoughts suggestions please? Im not sure if she has responded to the messages after i said anything...Im trying to stay out of things but its hard when you have people in different states and dont know one another.