Picking Engagement Rings and Frustrated with My Pickiness

cu97tiger · June 2015

CMGragain said:

I never intended to "put down" anyone's choice of an engagement ring. I worked for one of the largest jewelry companies in the USA for a couple of years before I married. My advice is not just subjective. I think most jewelers would agree with it.
However, sentimental value cannot be quantified. My mother's rings had absolutely no sentimental value. It did not bother me to have them reset into other jewelry. I do not look on them sentimentally. I envy those of your who have pieces, costume or otherwise, that have sentimental value. There is nothing like that in my family.
We are not talking about sentiment here, though. We are talking about the complete practicality of choosing a ring you will hopefully wear for a lifetime. The simple fact is that natural stones will hold their value over treated stones or lab created stones. Moissanite is very new, and nobody knows how it will hold it's value. As for morganite, I don't recommend it for vey practical reasons - it is fragile. I don't recommend opals, turquoise, or pearls, either, for the same reason, though I love them for their beauty. Same with morganite or emeralds. I seldom wear my emerald ring because it has several noticeable chips in the emerald stone from wear over the years.
No one can place a value on the sentiment that you will have for your ring. That would be silly. To say that one ring has more sentimental value than another because it is bigger, more valuable, or more unusual is silly, too. I would never say this.

Wait, are we talking about practicality of a ring we'll wear for a lifetime, or the value of the ring? Because you're talking about both, but making it really obvious that you only care about the value of the ring.

klk111415 · June 2015

Moissanite might be lab created now, but it was discovered in meteorites as silicon carbide in 1893 when at that time it was mistaken for diamonds. Scientists have been studying it ever since and have been able to figure out it's chemical structure and how to replicate it in a lab. It's science.

eilis1228 · June 2015

I just want to reiterate that my post was not meant to put down diamonds or say that you should not get a diamond. If you want a diamond, get a diamond. The article I linked explains that diamonds are by no means the ONLY stone for an engagement ring, which many people mistakenly believe thanks to DeBeers and market manipulation. I don't agree with the title of that article. Diamonds are not bullshit.

Furthermore, the idea that this ring is something you'll be wearing forever is also false. You can change your ring at any time. You can opt to only wear your wedding band. You can do whatever you want. The rings are merely symbols of your commitment to one another, they aren't going to be welded to you forever. If you want to wear it forever, awesome! If not, that's also awesome!

There's an episode of Parks & Rec that relates to this. Two of the characters have decided to get married a few months after finding out they're going to have a baby together. They go to a jeweler, and they spend HOURS going back and forth on a ring, whether or not it's even necessary, etc. They end up deciding on an engagement necklace because it fit their personalities and their relationship better.

The point to all of this is that you should get whatever piece of jewelry you want. There is no right or wrong answer. No one stone is better or worse than any other stone. Some stones may not be as well suited for every day wear and tear as others, but who cares? It's your ring.

I've seen gorgeous pearl, opal, and emerald engagement rings. I've seen beautiful moissanite and morganite rings. I've seen stunning diamond rings. Don't even get me started on classic sapphire rings... Diana/Kate's ring is just gorgeous! Most people here will agree that just about every ring is beautiful. There are very few stone snobs on these boards.

bethsmiles · June 2015

@eilis1228 - Love the Parks & Recs reference! That was a great scene.

All that matters is that you and your SO (but really mostly you) love the ring or no ring or necklace or whatever. If you want a diamond get a diamond, if you want something else then get something else. No choice is more valid than any other choice.

ETA: @CMGragain - Your advice is completely subjective because it's all relative to what you think an engagement ring should be which doesn't have shit to do with what someone else wants.

[Deleted User] · June 2015

*mod hat*

Simmah down, y'all.

jenjen047 · June 2015

im gonna file this thread under "why do you care about choices other people make that have literally zero impact on you or your life".

if you want a diamond, great. if you want a ruby, great. hell....if you want a gold plated dog turd, go for it.

Picking Engagement Rings and Frustrated with My Pickiness

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