PPD Rage

luckya23 · July 2015

NavyBlue143 said:

Apparently they did it because their venue charges less for just a celebration, so they had to prove they were married before they could use the property for their party.

Hopefully they live in a speedier county than mine, because I still haven't received my marriage certificate!

pinupbride6189 · July 2015

lyndausvi said:

Why the rush for the legal ceremony?

And who has a PPD on a Wednesday?

My sister is having her PPD on a Thursday. St. Patrick's Day actually. Not because it's St. Patrick's Day, but because the venue is cheaper during the week than on the weekend.

MobKaz · July 2015

beachyone15 said:

NavyBlue143 said:

Apparently they did it because their venue charges less for just a celebration, so they had to prove they were married before they could use the property for their party.

So not only are they liars, they're CHEAP liars. Nice.

How lovely they are willing and able to lie and deceive to save THEMSELVES money, but don't give a damn that their friends and family will be wasting hard earned money and time to attend a non-event. Awesome couple.

MobKaz · July 2015

pinupbride6189 said:

lyndausvi said:

Why the rush for the legal ceremony?

And who has a PPD on a Wednesday?

My sister is having her PPD on a Thursday. St. Patrick's Day actually. Not because it's St. Patrick's Day, but because the venue is cheaper during the week than on the weekend.

What am I missing? Why are they not just having the actual ceremony and reception on St. Pat"s day?

lyndausvi · July 2015

MobKaz said:

pinupbride6189 said:

lyndausvi said:

Why the rush for the legal ceremony?

And who has a PPD on a Wednesday?

My sister is having her PPD on a Thursday. St. Patrick's Day actually. Not because it's St. Patrick's Day, but because the venue is cheaper during the week than on the weekend.

What am I missing? Why are they not just having the actual ceremony and reception on St. Pat"s day?

All 8 of my great-grandparents came from Ireland. That reception better have a full open bar or there would be a riot in my family.

Pockets143 · July 2015

ChemFanatic25 · July 2015

NavyBlue143 said:

I would love to cancel, but we made travel plans with another couple, so we have to take that into consideration. The other couple is pretty pissed as well, but they don't want to cancel. I have half a dozen places I'd rather put that money we're spending to go, but it's not solely up to me.

**SITB - grr!**
Okay, so I normally don't mind PPD's - like as long as you're upfront about everything and tell everyone. In this case I can see why you are very hurt. So what do the other couple and you have planned? Could you guys go somewhere else with them? Like, what do you have planned that is dependent on the other couple - staying in a hotel room together? If it really bothers you (which it seems like it does and I totally understand) - I'd really consider changing your plans cause you're not going to be happy at this 'wedding.' Maybe instead of attending you guys could visit NYC. Also a lot of hotels allow you to cancel with full refund up to a week before, some are 24 hours before. If this is the only thing you are sharing in regards to cost with the couple - I'd opt with changing your plans.

LondonLisa · July 2015

Yeah, I would cancel. Even with this other couple. Maybe throw some money at them to cover a shared hire car or whatever you agreed to if you want to assuage any guilt (which you shouldn't be feeling).

At least save the money you would spend on meals out, petrol, etc. Hotel would most likely give you a refund, see if the flights can be transferred to another time. Definitely don't take a week off.

Not going at this point would save you at least a few hundred dollars and a week off. Seems like a no-brainer to me!

MegEn1 · July 2015

Cancel -- and tell them why! I say as I have my own posts on this site about not being able to confront crazies. BUT STILL.

fyrchk · July 2015

If it were me and I had to go because of this other couple (understand that your stuff is linked and for whatever reason you don't feel comfortable canceling on THEM), I'd pull the old, "My gift to you is my presence because I spent so much on plane fare, etc." But that's because I'm a vengeful person like that.

[Deleted User] · July 2015

C-A-N-C-E-L. They spelled out for you and the other guests that your time, money, and presence on their special day doesn't mean jack. Spell out for them you have better things to do.

NavyBlue143 · July 2015

Sorry guys, between a computer issue and TK being weird about letting me log in, I haven't been able to update.

For extra fun, the bride deleted all of our comments asking if they had gotten married already. I think a bunch of people were mad and asking questions.

H still wants to go. We had planned to go to Niagara Falls and Rochester while there, and H still wants to do those things. So we're going. I don't much want to, but we'll still have a good time, and get to travel with our best friends, and see some cool stuff we otherwise probably wouldn't see, so, I guess it'll be alright. The relationship with these people has definitely been damaged though, and I doubt they'll ever understand why exactly this was upsetting.

pinupbride6189 · July 2015

lyndausvi said:

MobKaz said:

pinupbride6189 said:

lyndausvi said:

Why the rush for the legal ceremony?

And who has a PPD on a Wednesday?

My sister is having her PPD on a Thursday. St. Patrick's Day actually. Not because it's St. Patrick's Day, but because the venue is cheaper during the week than on the weekend.

What am I missing? Why are they not just having the actual ceremony and reception on St. Pat"s day?

All 8 of my great-grandparents came from Ireland. That reception better have a full open bar or there would be a riot in my family.

@MobKaz I posted a thread about a week or so ago that my sister got married and didn't tell me until afterward (small ceremony on the pier conducted by my mom's long time friend, with parents in attendnace), but told me not to worry because they would still be having everything they were planning in March.

@lyndausvi The bar will be open, but I'm not sure about full. I was already kind of planning on it, but at this point I'll definitely be heading out afterward since the B&B where this massive lie is going down is downtown and walking distance from good bars.

OP, I'm sorry you're having to put up with the shit-tornado that is a PPD, but I'm glad you and your H will still be able to go and have fun doing other things.

Maggie0829 · July 2015

NavyBlue143 said:

Sorry guys, between a computer issue and TK being weird about letting me log in, I haven't been able to update.

For extra fun, the bride deleted all of our comments asking if they had gotten married already. I think a bunch of people were mad and asking questions.

H still wants to go. We had planned to go to Niagara Falls and Rochester while there, and H still wants to do those things. So we're going. I don't much want to, but we'll still have a good time, and get to travel with our best friends, and see some cool stuff we otherwise probably wouldn't see, so, I guess it'll be alright. The relationship with these people has definitely been damaged though, and I doubt they'll ever understand why exactly this was upsetting.

IMO, I would go and do the fun things you had planned but I would still skip the "wedding." I would just enjoy this nice vacation with your H and your friends, but I would not be going to this PPD.

julieanne912 · July 2015

I'd go, and gift them a card full of glitter.

cupcait927 · July 2015

NavyBlue143 said:

Sorry guys, between a computer issue and TK being weird about letting me log in, I haven't been able to update.

For extra fun, the bride deleted all of our comments asking if they had gotten married already. I think a bunch of people were mad and asking questions.

H still wants to go. We had planned to go to Niagara Falls and Rochester while there, and H still wants to do those things. So we're going. I don't much want to, but we'll still have a good time, and get to travel with our best friends, and see some cool stuff we otherwise probably wouldn't see, so, I guess it'll be alright. The relationship with these people has definitely been damaged though, and I doubt they'll ever understand why exactly this was upsetting.

Off topic, but where is the wedding located? You'll be in my neck of the woods so hence the curiosity.

paperpusher · July 2015

I would give them a card. No gift.

Liatris2010 · July 2015

If there is no way of not going, how about just showing up for the reception? It's not like you'd be missing their wedding ceremony.

sassercake12 · July 2015

cupcait927 said:

NavyBlue143 said:

Sorry guys, between a computer issue and TK being weird about letting me log in, I haven't been able to update.

For extra fun, the bride deleted all of our comments asking if they had gotten married already. I think a bunch of people were mad and asking questions.

H still wants to go. We had planned to go to Niagara Falls and Rochester while there, and H still wants to do those things. So we're going. I don't much want to, but we'll still have a good time, and get to travel with our best friends, and see some cool stuff we otherwise probably wouldn't see, so, I guess it'll be alright. The relationship with these people has definitely been damaged though, and I doubt they'll ever understand why exactly this was upsetting.

Off topic, but where is the wedding located? You'll be in my neck of the woods so hence the curiosity.

Seconding this.

luckya23 · July 2015

sassercake12 said:

cupcait927 said:

NavyBlue143 said:

Sorry guys, between a computer issue and TK being weird about letting me log in, I haven't been able to update.

For extra fun, the bride deleted all of our comments asking if they had gotten married already. I think a bunch of people were mad and asking questions.

H still wants to go. We had planned to go to Niagara Falls and Rochester while there, and H still wants to do those things. So we're going. I don't much want to, but we'll still have a good time, and get to travel with our best friends, and see some cool stuff we otherwise probably wouldn't see, so, I guess it'll be alright. The relationship with these people has definitely been damaged though, and I doubt they'll ever understand why exactly this was upsetting.

Off topic, but where is the wedding located? You'll be in my neck of the woods so hence the curiosity.

Seconding this.

I'll third that!

randomslove · July 2015

If you go pleeeeeaaaassseeee tell me you aren't bringing a gift. I mean, buying a present costs money and this just a generic celebration/party.

NavyBlue143 · July 2015

Definitely no gift. We were planning on a pretty generous check, but not anymore. I'm sure that seems petty to some, but whatever. I love the card with glitter idea. I might seriously consider it.

The wedding will be in Sterling.

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